Talo Segura

Forbes estimated in 2016 that Queen Elizabeth has an estimated private wealth of $530 million.

"If you leave your bandmate behind, you won’t finish the journey together." Isn't this a metaphor that describes Danny and Jake? But what? But... I love you? “I love you, Jacob,” he whispered to me in the silence. “I’ve always loved you.” Danny always has, he perhaps wasn't certain about how far, he wasn't sure of himself and his feelings. Maybe he didn't want to say "I love you," to Jake because maybe he's never said those words to anyone, maybe he had to be certain. The worst feelings are Jake's guilt, it has to be in there somewhere, all mixed up with his father, the divorce, the cheating, and Ryan. Lots of you hate... and that is really hate this idea of "cheating." There's no denying that aspect, but there's a lot of love in here, all mixed up between Jake, Danny, Ryan, and not forgetting Mr Reilly! Judgements are two a penny, I wouldn't make a judgement call.

You have me hooked. I'm eager to see how this develops, I have the feeling it might be a long story?

"... How will you react when someone else has what you want?” The reactions in the comments put a lot of emphasis on sex and less on relationships. Danny and Jake have been best friends forever, but Jake and Ryan shared first love and lots of time (and sex) together. The difficult thing is how will Jake tell Ryan. Will he? How will Ryan react? Where does this leave the three of them? How much can you share? And finally back to that first question, how will you react? My opinion: I thought it was beautiful, Danny wanted it and so did Jake. Does Ryan get hurt? I don't know, probably a bit, maybe a lot. How much I guess depends if Ryan and Jake stay together and I kind of think they will, but I don't really know.

Yeah, I'd go to Nifty for an orgasm Perhaps being more serious for a moment, members only loses a lot of readers. Only members can comment and like, but in readership numbers I think I'm right in saying there are way more non-members, readers who don't want to join for whatever reason, but still read here.

Nice beginning, it's very cold and there is something familiar about the plot, but then there are a lot of prison planets.

I'm sorry, four chapters in, and this has nothing to do with the writing, I don't know how the story will pan out, it's good so far, but I am too curious: why is it rated - Mature - Member Only I feel like I entered a private members only strip club, but I don't see any pole dancers or hustlers. I can't help wondering when does it turn XXX? It's fine how it is, but I'm bugged (bugged, I said) by this rating.

I just want to take time out from discussing the storyline, which is great and has been well commented on. I believe at the start of this you pretended you were simply throwing it together and seeing how it went, haha, what an understatement. Let me say that I have immense admiration for you as an author, for something thrown together it's an incredible recipe. There are things to be learned from you for all us would be authors, one of which is the way these chapters are each scenes from the life story. It's evident with the jump in time from chapter nine to ten, there was no need to progress (as many stories do) all the way along the linear time track. It was enough to tell us Jake and Ryan got it together. Pushing the scenes along like this makes the story run with a tremendously exciting pace. Far too many stories get bogged down in the hum drum. It's a lesson I will take away from this. It is the only story at the moment that I genuinely look forward to reading, both for the characters and story, but also because it is so well put together, so well written.

No, a Silver Ghost! https://www.levencarcompany.co.uk/news/rolls-royce-silver-ghost-now-available-in-stock/

Luc Besson might have been thinking about those anthropologists listening to the song when he used the name for his film 'Lucy'

Reading this is like a see-saw, a balancing act between getting into the story and trying to understand exactly what is being described. You have a brilliant imagination and creativity, I find it sometimes hard to follow though, as if you are expelling the story from your mind to the keyboard too quickly. There are lots of little errors and lots of descriptions that don't seem to spend enough time being shown to the reader. It makes it hard going for what is a good creative story. An editor, or someone to read it through and make suggestions, would improve this. If you think you don't know what I'm talking about, take the final paragraph: - The wind seemed to make the rings throughout the woods around him dance and bounce. - What does that mean? What are you describing? What rings? The sin eaters, they are described, but giving only the vaguest idea of who or what they might be. A smoky and cloudy-white chunk of quartz seemingly floated, interlaced by string, orbited by a wicker halo, a fountain of crow and crimson montawk feathers draping in the wind. That is a detailed description, but of what? For me it's too difficult to follow.

Everything, from the books on the shelves to the plagues on the wall, were carefully arranged. Plaques - I wouldn't usually bother to highlight an error, except it cracked me up, and I know it's a little thing that slipped in, that you ought to correct. Least ways you see I read every word! Good story, getting interesting.

Jake and Danny have a complicated relationship which I would not begin to try and interpret, because every reader sees that relationship in terms of their own life experiences. Sure there will be similarities in there, possibly very similar, but Jake is Jake and Danny is Danny, they both have their good points and neither is perfect. Pity Jake doesn't feel anything much for Ryan, because they get on well in an easy relaxed way without all the tensions between him and Danny. My only thought, given how tightly strung Jake is, it is good he never let Danny do more than sixty-nine, had he, it might have been devastating.

It's common practice in France, one of the reasons so many medical personnel are need. It takes five people to turn a patient who is being incubated.

There are lots of observations about the characters, but they don't seem to lead anywhere or give any depth, simply observations. Emily pops gum, strawberry gum, uses coconut shampoo, changes her hair colour every week, doesn't like public displays of affection. That's a lot of information, but I still don't feel I know who she is, just a picture in a magazine, without any emotion or feeling. Perhaps Emily is just this superficial girlfriend, she is afterall bedazzled by an IPhone! Then again, Finn says she has ambition to be a Senator before forty which lends itself to showing a person as having depth of character. Maybe not in America, where movie stars and business tycoons seemingly lacking in depth of character get elected? The story is interesting, it can be difficult to read and hard to follow in places.

Me too! Funny how an iconic little machine can have that effect.

They're selling a different version of the Easter bunny here (laugh or cry, I'm not sure which!).

That song was released with an accompanying psychedelic cartoon, like Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds was supposedly about LSD, although Lennon said his son Julian came home from school one day with a picture he'd painted of a friend called Lucy, which had sparkling stars in the sky. Whatever, the sixties were an interesting period of sex, drugs, and music (not just rock n roll... lol!). I digress from the story, but I blame you @jkwsquirrel for putting so much interesting background stuff in there.

That is a great insight, I never thought about it that way, but I think you are spot on.

The story is interesting and pretty well set out with nice pacing, but there are some issues. What does: "the fountain began to profound the pair," mean? I think that is one of a few little errors? Least ways, I don't understand that statement. I hesitated between reactions and settled on simply: I read it, but I didn't dislike it and am going to read chapter two.

There is no mention of other friends, there's Jake and his best friend Danny, but surely at fifteen (at any age) both boys would have a bunch of guys they were friends with and hung out together? Do they really only have each other? If there were other friends there would be other people (their own age) to share with and talk to, not a detailed exposé of their relationship, but for a broader picture and others to hang out with. Neither Jake nor Danny seem complete loners, proof Danny knows quite a few girls that seem to like him. Supposing Danny likes both guys and girls, where does that leave Jake?

Doing a search for Sci-fi novels to read (Genre = Sci-fi) it throws up stories tagged were-creatures. Do you count were-creatures as Sci-fi or fantasy or maybe both?

You do realise that string can be the stuff that holds everything together? Just saying 😊

I see you wrote a whole load of other stories and this one you said is be written off the cuff as you go. My appreciation just changed from liking it to loving it and that's not because you did did anything different in his chapter, but to show you how good you are as an author in constructing a story that lives off the pages. You can't help but get close to these characters and they just grow on you. All I can add, is that you obviously learnt a lot from your previous writing that you fall into narrating this like fish in water. You also managed to describe a teenage sexual encounter in an almost perfect way, that was very believable and well balanced. Super ☺️

Richie Tennyson's take on Cinderella is cleverly surreal in its interpretation of this classic story. Fairy tales by their very nature are unreal, strange, even dream like, but this goes one step further. By a clever twist of the imagination, the author mixes reality with make believe and brings the tale alive by putting a real life human inside the book. And take note, he finds he is not the only real person trapped inside the pages playing out the tale, which strives to arrive at a happy ever after ending. Back in the real world personal relationships amongst the hard working employees of the company responsible for delivering the story, have their own drama and intrigue. Tension reaches a critical point as Dave attempts to rescue his newly introduced friend Ryan, the one chosen to replace the missing fairy tale Prince in the story book. The unknown second human also there, is a saboteur, and added to all this, the problem for the story is that Ryan is gay and not particularly attracted to the opposite sex! How will they ever arrive at a happy ever after ending? With so much going on the pace is fast and the story addictive. There is, you might say, never a dull moment. Plenty of twists and unpredictable turns leave the reader guessing as to what exactly is going on and what will happen next. Turning a well known story into an excitingly different read is no easy feat, and Mr Tennyson manages this with some aplomb. This was clearly not a story thrown together, but thought out and planned. It also, along the way, poses a very pertinent question about how we might all be to some extent programmed by society in our life expectations. Every little boy to grow up and become a Prince, who will fall in love with and marry his Princess, or visa versa, but with the same result, they (we) live happily ever after. An excellent book which I would recommend anyone to read and which is refreshingly different. Possibly if you are looking for simply another gay romantic life drama, you might find you are disappointed, but if you want to be entertained by a story with a gay theme and lots of intrigue, you will enjoy the ride.