Graeme

Unfortunately, it appears that a lot of husbands coming out to their wives is due to being found out after cheating on them. This immediately puts the relationship on rocky ground even before the shock of finding out about the husband's sexual orientation hits. But the orientation is still an issue. My wife's counselor told her about a woman who had been to several counselors about her husband's infidelity, but nothing was resolved because she had never told them the gender of who the husband had had an affair with. That one point matters, because it complicates an already volatile situation. One of the other books recommended by my wife's counselor is an Australian study call She's My Wife, He's Just Sex by Sue Joseph. The title says it all; it's a look at married men who would have anonymous sex on the side. I started reading this one, too, but I couldn't finish it. It scared me too much because I could see myself in the men described in the book. The desire for gay sex, the pressure building up...I understood it too well. That may, to some extent, explain why so many married men are outed by having gay affairs. They start by needing to know, to needing to find out, and then they need the release from time-to-time...and sooner or later they get caught. What I found, though, was by not hiding from my wife, the pressure was reduced. I can remember talking to her after a wedding about wanting to tell my friends that I'm gay, and she said it was okay if I did. That was enough to take off the pressure -- I didn't need to tell them anymore.

Congratulations, Ron! This is very much deserved You have a great collection of stories at your website, and I look forward to seeing them here, too.

If only it were that simple... As a married man with children who came out to his wife and whose marriage has survived for more than 12 years since I did so, I can say with some authority that it takes someone special for that to happen. Every relationship relies on compromise. A relationship where one party doesn't compromise is one-sided, because the other party is doing all the work to keep them together. When my wife was undergoing counseling after I came out to her, her counselor warned her that if she wanted to keep her marriage together she would have to compromise...but the danger was compromising herself out of existence. She needed to work out what boundaries she would accept and what actions would cross those boundaries and be unacceptable. For my wife, the boundary was clear: I needed to stay true to my marriage vow of monogamy. That's a boundary that I've accepted. No threesomes, no boyfriend on the side, none of that sort of thing. On her side, she accepted that I needed an outlet and that outlet is the Internet and my writing. She doesn't just tolerate what I do online, she supports it. She's read most of what I've written and commented on early versions at times to make them stronger. I've had readers comment that I have strong female characters in my stories. They can thank my wife for that Sadly, finding an acceptable compromise to keep a marriage together is difficult. I found out after I came out to my wife that 90% of marriages where one partner comes out fail. I'm one of the lucky 10%. At the time, I was assisted by two other married men in a similar situation -- both of their marriages failed. Their wives couldn't accept that they were gay. Since I know the struggles my own wife went through to accept it, I can appreciate why it was difficult for them to do so. There was pain experienced by all concerned, with little in the way of good news to counter that pain. There's an old book called Uncommon Lives by Catherine Whitney about people like the couple in the story. It was one of the books that was recommended to my wife by her counselor, but the level of compromise that those women have agreed to was more than my wife was willing to do. It's not for everyone. It's not a question of honesty -- it's a question of personal self-worth and integrity. Some people...maybe even most people...aren't willing or able to open up their relationships like that couple did. Where honesty comes into play, though, is that a couple in that situation need to talk. They can't hide away or pretend it's not happening. My wife's counselor made it quite clear to her what could happen, up to and including talking about anonymous sex in toilets, etc, and the risk of HIV. She wouldn't let my wife pretend that it couldn't happen. If my wife was going to stay with me (which is what I wanted), then she needed to do so with both eyes open. That's where honesty comes into play. That's where I had to tell her about my sexual encounters with men from before we were married (those anonymous sexual encounters that her counselor had told her about). That's where I told her about how the pressure would build up and I needed a release, because without it I would almost certainly do something stupid and wrong by cheating on her. By being honest with each other, we were able to find a compromise that both of us are happy with. I came out to my wife early 2004. We weren't sure if we would make it to our 15th wedding anniversary. Last year we celebrated our 25th... Mixed orientation marriages can work, but they're not easy and they're prone to failure...and every one that works is unique because in something like this there's no answer that fits everyone., or even most.

Zac's pains and fears are coming through clearly. At least his self-hatred hasn't (so far) turned to homophobia or suicide. I think that knowing that his younger brother is gay will stop both of those possiblities (he can't hate his brother, and he won't hurt his brother by leaving him alone), but that means Zac has to find another way out. Things have just become more complicated, now that he knows that Adrian isn't able to come out because of his father. If they get together, both of them are going to have to hide deep in the closet, and that can be a challenge. As for Kenny, we're going to have to wait and see. I'm sure we'll find out soon enough what Rachel told Alise, and what Alise then told Kenny.

I agree that an epilogue is a good idea. The problem with having this chapter from Jacob's point of view is that we've missed all the drama that would've occurred if we still had Josh's point of view. However, knowing what Jacob was going through was important, too, so you were in an unenviable position in deciding what to do there. I'm really glad that something appears to be resolved regarding Josh -- his grandmother was adamant that he won't be going back to his parents. However, she also said that Jacob's parents would explain the rest...and they didn't. The epilogue will hopefully clear that up. One thing I will say is that while this chapter felt a little dead from the point of view of drama and excitement, given Jacob's exhaustion, that's exactly how it should've felt from his point of view. The feeling of I-don't-care-anymore came across strongly in the early part of the chapter, though he still had that edge of independence that is Jacob. Well done with that bit of characterisation!

I first stumbled across this story at Nifty, and was more than pleased when it started posting here. It's one of the most enjoyable and memorable stories that I've read in recent years -- it's that good. It really stands out from the crowd and I hope having it featured this month will encourage another wave of fans.

Thank you! In some ways, this was one of the more challenging chapters to write. The major events were not a surprise to the readers, so to keep it interesting I needed to get the personalities and reactions spot on. Thanks for letting me know that you thought I succeeded.

Thank you. I pondered the issue for months before including it. Ultimately, it felt wrong to ignore the tragedy in a story where I have been trying to stick to real events as much as possible.

Let's start at the end...yes! A happy ending to this chapter, and the sign of a new chapter opening up in Toph's life. Now, onto other matters. I can really appreciate why Steve reacted the way he did. He's not used to money and it scared him. I really like how Toph recognises what happened and believes Steve's story. While he doesn't say it, it also strengthens his relationship with Gary because money will never be scary for Gary. Ultimately, money is just a tool, but for those who are not used it it can be a frightening tool. At least Steve didn't become greedy and covet the money Toph's mother had given him. Now onto the upcoming confrontation with Toph's mother. I wouldn't be surprised if she claims to not realise what she's been doing. After all, if you've always had money and always used money to solve problems, giving it to 'people you care about' isn't nefarious at all. She deposited money into Toph's account and she gave money to Steve when she thought he was Toph's boyfriend. I'm sure she'll say that she didn't mean any harm by doing so; she was just being generous. That doesn't mean that she's innocent, just that she'll try to claim that she is. We don't really know that much about her. Most of our perceptions have come from Toph, with only Gary's comments about how she appeared to have a mini-breakdown when Toph walked out on the family as a counter. It's the latter that gives rise to the possibility that Toph's mother isn't as bad as he fears. However, we'll all just going to have to wait and see...

As usual, there's way too much for me to comment on But, thanks Tim and don't change. I always enjoy reading your comments, both here and in the forums. As indicated in an earlier chapter, most (if not all) of the AFL clubs have their own media divisions. You can pretty much guarantee that all draftees (especially a first round pick) will be interviewed by the club's media division and the video placed on their website. A few draftees (eg. the number one draft pick and maybe a handful of the others in the top ten) will also be interviewed by the AFL's media team and/or the mainstream media. A press conference to present the players drafted isn't normal.

Important stuff first: Happy Birthday! All the clubs get a first round pick, but as you indicated, the Bulldogs traded theirs away. So did Carlton, but they traded to get one back again (the last pick in round one, as it turns out), leaving them with a pick before the Bulldogs. Peter wasn't able to convince Jason that having a pick before Carlton should be a priority. That's what Peter was referring to. I so much wanted a few more players to be drafted, but the problem is always that there are so many more capable players than there are spots in the AFL. Someone always misses out. This time it was Ross, though Charlie also had his second chance fail.

Getting two people drafted from the same VFL club is exceptional by itself. If you go back to Leopard Spots chapter 18, Paddy mentioned that he thought the Leopards looked like Frankston from 2012 (one player drafted in the main draft and two in the rookie draft) or Bendigo from 2011 (one and three). Having two players drafted in the main draft already puts the Leopards above those prior examples. Have a great time at the wedding and party!

Paddy's one of my favourite characters And knowing Ty, unless something goes badly wrong, yes, his success will be rubbed into his father's face on a regular basis And that will be a good thing

I think with enough characters anxious about the draft, there was enough there for whole chapter Admittedly, I also had to use the incident with Phil Hughes, but that allowed me to re-introduce Ty's father, too... And on that subject, my beta-reader also worried that Ty was going to hit his old man, so you're no alone in that respect.

Sorry to come in late, but... :wizard: Happy Birthday! :wizard:

Charlie had just finished packing his backpack when he heard the knock at his bedroom door. He wasn’t surprised to see Dave standing there. “G’day.” “Morning, Charlie.” Dave nodded his head towards Charlie’s bag. “Heading out somewhere?” “Our classes are over for the year, but Karen and Stacey are going back into the city, anyway. Karen has an appointment regarding a tutoring job for next year, and one of the clubs Stacey’s in has organised an end-of-school social event she wants to attend.”

Wow...thank you! This is the first story I ever wrote, so I really appreciate the great comments. I've always tried to give each character their own personality, and not make them stereotypes, so thank you for letting me know that I succeeded.

Oh, wow... Thank you! I like interesting characters, and while I don't always succeed, I also like to make each character different. Indeed, making and keeping characters distinct is one of the pleasures I get from writing.

And continuing the Syrian theme: Syrian refugee helps Canadian bride with her wedding dress

Zac's fears and worries felt so real, which is a sign of great writing. I also liked how the chapter started with Zac's humorous problem of how to get some condoms. That was fun to read, even if it was embarrassing for Zac. Zac is afraid of being gay. That's why he reacted as he did to Adrian in the bathroom. It is all too common, unfortunately. What I did like, though, is how he apologized before he left. That show a lot of character, and I hope Adrian interprets it correctly.

Zac's confusion continues and he's struggling to work out what to do. In that situation, even ideas he knows are bad can look good. Billy and Lonnie is an interested development. I can't help wonder if in previous times when they've played basketball with Zac that they were also that physical, but Zac hadn't noticed. As he's realised, his perceptions of other guys has altered, and maybe he's now more aware of things that passed him by previously. Otherwise, it's a remarkable coincidence that Lonnie became physical with Zac on just that day.

:joe: Happy Birthday! :joe: :music: :music:

Things are sounding more hopeful for Jackson, at least on the swimming front. If he's managing borderline decent times with a poor technique, then he has a lot of potential. On the personal front, however, there is still a lot of angst. Things will explode there eventually, but I hope Jackson and Luke get through it relatively unscathed.

:wizard: Happy Birthday, Steve! :wizard: :Steve2: :Steve2:

Thank you! Regarding those two bedrooms, we don't know the exact shades of blue and pink. When we bought our current home, our bedroom was a rather overpowering blue. We told ourselves we'd repaint it, but we never did (we added an extension to the house to make a new master bedroom instead). We got used to the colour and it didn't make as much of an impact after awhile as it did initially. If the second bedroom was a soft pink, I can see someone getting used to it quickly. And, in case it wasn't obvious, the end of this chapter, the day Cricket Australia made their press release, is the day of the AFL national draft.