xander

But then when you roll around and move it moves too....that would get annoying fast. lol

Uhh...what link are we talking about?

Merry Christmas Everyone!!! Hope everyone has a great Christmas and can spend it with their loved ones. Xan

Hehe, my dad was telling me a story one day about when he was growing up on my grandparents farm in Minnesota. Apparently his cousins came over and the one was being a real asshole to my dad so my dad told him to go piss on the electric fence, it'd be cool. He's like, "I aint pissin on that", "Why not, its not plugged in" and then he touched it to show him. So my dads cousin starts pissing on the fence, and my dad went around the corner and plugged it in.... :nuke: .... to say the least.... My grandma came outside and asked my dad what was wrong with his cousin, who was now on the ground holding himself in pain...."Oh, he insisted on peeing on the fence, I told him not to." lol

Traveling back to my 7th and 8th grade years, back to middle school, and into science class we find the best, most inspirational teacher that I have had in my whole life. That would be Mrs. G. I was kinda teachers pet but she, in a way, treated everyone like that, but me a touch more. Anyway, I've kept in touch with her and talk to her every so often (she's Xander's friend Moses' owner...the teachers house that I went to that day, yea). Getting back to that in a moment....Tis the season to be jolly....I made gingerbread cookies and gave them to my teachers as a little Christmas gift and I of course had to give Mrs. G some. After school, after I had delivered all the cookies, I drove over to the middle school and waited for her to get out of a meeting with the principal. She lets me in from the outside door that's sposed to be exit only, but hey, I'm teachers pet lol. I give her the cookies and say Merry Christmas and we start talking...we talked about a bunch of stuff and I had told her a few times about what Whorena has done between Justin and I, and she asks me how things are with Justin. I told her the little cable station/Justin's mom story and she kept looking at me like she was trying to pull something out of me, before she eventually changed the subject. I think she knows that I'm gay....I think she was trying to pull it out of me, and that one of the main reasons I get so hurt when something bad happens with him is that I love him...Justin was in my 7th grade science class and she knew we are best friends...always sat next to each other and worked together and stuff. I think she would be a good person to come out to because she's one of the few adults that I'm really close to and I know she would never think anything less of me, heck I think she's waiting for and wants me to tell her. Just a thought, but to be honest, I have trouble giving a speech in front of a few people, I don't know how I'd ever tell someone I'm close to that I'm gay.

He's still my same little buddy!! He seems just a bit calmer but otherwise he's my baby boy guys...his wound looks kinda weird....yea..

Happy Birthday Kitty!

Yea, 7/8 labrador and 1/8 golden retriever. You would never tell that he isnt purebred, unless you looked for the small amounts of white on his belly and by the tips of his paws.

Well I hated that I had to do it, but today I took Xander to the vet to get his "testiculars" removed . I didn't want to, believe me...I wanted to let him be a little naughty at least once in his life, but sadly, all he got was to hump the air above his friend Moses' leg. I knew this was coming when we kept Xander, because obviously animals are animals and we didnt want any inbred puppies. I tried sticking up for Xander a few times by saying 1) that it's my dog house and kennel, and 2) for that reason, my dog shouldnt have to get fixed, Jayne should get fixed, because 3) where we're living now, we wouldnt be able to let Jayne have the puppies, because our landlord was kinda hesitant about letting us keep Xander because we hadnt let him know about him, only Jayne and Oreo ... BUUUUUT, they brought up an interesting point that even if Jayne couldnt get pregnant, that getting the male fixed makes them lose interest, and it would still be nasty if he was humping his mommy... Anyway, I took him there this morning, gave him a bunch of hugs and kissies and told him good bye until tomorrow after school. I hope he's still the same little loveable pup that I fell in love with ...oh I remember when he could fit in the palms of my hands....I used to go steal him from Jayne and let him sleep on my bed while I was on my computer....he knew his name before his eyes were even open...I would lay him on his back on my bed covered up and he would fall asleep...then I would say "Xander!" in a high pitched voice and he would roll over onto his stomach and try to sniff for me since he couldnt see yet... Oh I hope he still acts the same and is always glad to see me like he is now...my little buddy.... Here's a picture of him for those who've never seen him: Xander at 3 and a half months... I snuck out the backdoor and got this awesome picture of him sleeping...it was after a long day of humping the air above Moses' leg and going to see Justin and stuff...

I have never seen that one before, that was a good shivery one tho... I am completely against drinking and drugs and stuff, so I don't ever have to worry, except maybe like the girl in this poem... Death of an Innocent I went to a party, Mom, I remembered what you said. You told me not to drink, Mom, So I drank soda instead. I really felt proud inside, Mom, The way you said I would. I didn't drink and drive, Mom, Even though the others said I should. I know I did the right thing, Mom, I know you are always right. Now the party is finally ending, Mom, As everyone is driving out of sight. As I got into my car, Mom, I knew I'd get home in one piece. Because of the way you raised me, So responsible and sweet. I started to drive away, Mom, But as I pulled out into the road, The other car didn't see me, Mom, And hit me like a load. As I lay there on the pavement, Mom, I hear the policeman say, "The other guy is drunk," Mom, And now I'm the one who will pay. I'm lying here dying, Mom... I wish you'd get here soon. How could this happen to me, Mom? My life just burst like a balloon. There is blood all around me, Mom, And most of it is mine. I hear the medic say, Mom, I'll die in a short time. I just wanted to tell you, Mom, I swear I didn't drink. It was the others, Mom. The others didn't think. He was probably at the same party as I. The only difference is, he drank And I will die. Why do people drink, Mom? It can ruin your whole life. I'm feeling sharp pains now. Pains just like a knife. The guy who hit me is walking, Mom, And I don't think it's fair. I'm lying here dying And all he can do is stare. Tell my brother not to cry, Mom. Tell Daddy to be brave. And when I go to heaven, Mom, Put "Daddy's Girl" on my grave. Someone should have told him, Mom, Not to drink and drive. If only they had told him, Mom, I would still be alive. My breath is getting shorter, Mom. I'm becoming very scared. Please don't cry for me, Mom. When I needed you, you were always there. I have one last question, Mom. Before I say good bye. I didn't drink and drive, So why am I the one to die? I'm pretty sure a lot of you have seen this one...I've seen it all over, it was even in our town paper one day.

It's always sad to see someone out in the cold, but what made it even sadder was that he was willing to give up his warmth for his dog . I would do the same thing for Xander, but I don't think that would be necessary, considering he's got a bunch of loose skin covered with a thick layer of a nice soft winter coat. I'm guessing that it was a small dog tho. Aww .... poor guys .... I wish I could help them out... Lol, toe socks....never worn them...my mom's gotten them for gift but she dint wear them either...

Are you talking about the Ms. Grinch thingy? If so, it's true! Lol...Ron White quote again..."things that make ya go 'bahhaah' "... Xan

Happy Birthday Dave! Hope it's a great one.

I got another "gives you the shivers" poem...this one I found at the hospital one night on the waiting room table..someone had gotten it emailed to them and left the print-out there...you'll find that kinda ironic after you read it. Mommy's Little Angel Unknown Author There came a frantic knock at the doctor's office door, a knock, more urgent, than he had ever heard before. "Come in, come in," the impatient doctor said. "Come in,come in, before you wake the dead." In walked a frightened little girl, a child no more than nine. It was plain for all to see, she had troubles on her mind. "Oh doctor, I beg you, please come with me, my mother is surely dying, she's as sick as she can be." "I don't make house calls, bring your mother here." "But she's too sick, so you must come or she will die I fear." The doctor, touched by her devotion, decided he would go, she said he would be blessed, more than he could ever know. She led him to her house, where her mother lay in bed. Her mother was so very sick she couldn't raise her head. But her eyes cried out for help and help her the doctor did, she would have died that very night had it not been for her kid. The doctor got her fever down, and she lived through the night. And morning brought the doctor signs, that she would be all right. The doctor said he had to leave but would return again by two, and later he came back to check, just like he said he'd do. The mother praised the doctor for all the things he'd done. He told her she would have died, were it not for her little one. "How proud you must be of your wonderful little girl, it was her pleading that made me come, she is really quite a pearl!" "But doctor, my daughter died over three years ago, is the picture on the wall of the little girl you know?" The doctors legs went limp for the picture on the wall, was the same little girl for whom he'd made this call. The doctor stood motionless, for quite a little while, And then his solemn face, was broken by his smile. He was thinking of that frantic knock heard at his office door, And of the beautiful little angel that had walked across his floor. I love poems like these, if anyone can find more like it (sends a shiver down your back), let me know.

Okay, as you all know, I'm in love with my best friend Justin....and you all know that even if I could get up enough courage to tell him at least that I'm gay, he's been seduced by an evil siren whore aka Whorena. But then theres still the chances that he's not gay :( ... well last Friday and up until today, our chorus class has been excused from regular classes for our christmas concert rehearsal. There's this kid that sits next to me named Brandon and he's kinda cute and over the past couple days we've kinda became in a way friends. If you just heard some of the shit he said, you would swear he's gay...he like refers almost everything back to "cock"..."god that smells like cock"...."that stuff tastes like cum"...he says it most likely, kiddingly, but it's as if he was trying to hint to me that he's gay or something. And he kept wanting me to get up and go to the pop machines with him, so I have been and stuff. We were talking about Ron White and I was repeating his homophobe story thing...for your ammusement, goes something like this... This one guy I know is like a huge homophobe, and let me tell you that's like one of the stupidest things you can be. I say to him, "we're all gay, its just to what extent are you gay" "I aint gay!" "Okay then. Tell me something, do you like porn? "Yea, I love porn, why?" "Well do you only like scenes with two women?" "No, I like seeing a man and a woman making love" "Well do you like the man to have a small, semi-flaccid penis?" "No, I like big, hard, throbbin COCK! ......... I did not know that about myself..." And then after him saying all the stuff he had said, he's like (before I told the whole story, he interupted me at "homophobe"), "I'm a huge homophobe" And I thought Justin sent weird vibes... That was today during rehearsal, then tonight at our concert, he was saying more stuff like that, and he was saying that different things were making him horny ... oo la la ... lol .... if anything I think he's bi because he, I can tell, definately likes girls too...but I'd like to get to know some other gay guys at school and stuff...theres for sure one openly gay guy at my school, but I've never talked to him, he's always hanging around girls and stuff, and he seems like a cool guy to get to know...I kinda made one of my kinda-friends look like an asshole one day about him...the gay guy is in his genetics class and he was saying something about getting partnered up by the teacher for something and he says, "I'm glad I wasnt his partner". I say with a completly smirk-less face, "Why?"...he's like, after a few seconds pause, "I'm not a homophobe, its just that..its...yea.." and he shut up, realizing he had already made an ass of himself. Then there's this RJ (like 18-19 I think) I used to work with at KFC...he was sooo cute and had a great smile. I never found out if he was gay, a few people had said he was, and I had kinda suspected it, but its not like I was gonna go and ask him. I find out the other night that he lives two blocks down from me, and I had seen him outside and he told me to come over sometime...I'd like to, but we used to live in the apartment building he lives in, and it used to have roaches and that is not a memory I want to relive...lol.. So I guess the point of all my jumbling is what if Justin isnt gay ? I've kinda been reserving myself incase he is, and I think I've hurt a few people in the process , and I dont want to do that anymore. But I guess I need to consider if he isnt .....yea...just thinkin and confused guys...

This one might get you teary, I'm not sure though...It will definately give you the chills though (in a good way, lol)...it's a poem by Ruth Gillis... The Wreck on Highway 109 A drunk man in an Oldsmobile they said had run the light that caused the six-car pileup on 109 that night. When broken bodies lay about and blood was everywhere, the sirens screamed out eulogies, for death was in the air. A mother, trapped inside her car, was heard above the noise; her plaintive plea near split the air: "Oh, God, please spare my boys!" She fought to loose her pinioned hands; she struggled to get free, but mangled metal held her fast in grim captivity. Her frightened eyes then focused on where the back seat once had been, but all she saw was broken glass and two children

Happy Birthday Patrick! Xan

Well yea, you see, the Grinch's socks were too tight....with Whorena, its probably her pants because she's getting fat, and when she wears a shirt that's too short, her rolls with stretch marks on them hang out .... Just thought I'd share some pleasant imagery ...that I was unfortunate enough to have to witness last year during english....

Happy Birthday Kat!

All I got read was the first chapter (i gotta get to bed, like bad..its 1:46 ), but I dint cry yet...surprised though....what a sad way to begin a story ..... Say slaveboy.... I've always liked finding things that make me cry too...i wonder wats up with us... lol

Wow Viv...lol, funny story about the sweet potatoes...I know what you mean about doing like 500 things at once...I pretty much made the whole dinner by myself and I for once wanted to eat at a normal time, because when my mom makes the holiday meal, we're lucky if we get to eat by 4:00. So I wanted to eat around 12:30 - 1:00 and I was starting to get my nerves hyped up because do you think my brother or dad could do anything helpful like set the table? No...heaven forbid . The only catastrophies we had were a few minor burns... when I was taking something out of the oven, the brown and serve rolls that were in a glass cake pan fell on my arms and burned my right arm (not that bad but it hurt for a while). Then I had gotten the potatoes done a bit early so they were about lukewarm by time we ate and to my mom they would have been "ice cold"....she used to be a dishwasher in a restaurant, and I dont know if you know any ex-dishwashers, but they like loose a lot of nerve endings, and apparently in there mouth too....anyway, I put them in the oven on about 150-200 to warm em up a bit and kinda forgot about em for about 5-10 min so they were fine but the bowl was really hot....I take it out and set it on the counter....my brother goes up to our counter/bar to dish up and lifts the potato bowl and f**king burns his hands ...kinda mean to laugh but he had it coming for not doing anything I asked him to do that day...plus he's just a general asshole so yea... Good to hear that your little piggy did a good job with her song...I want so bad to be in plays but I havestage fright... ...it's good that she dont...hey, maybe she'll become and outstanding actress! lol, hey it can happen... Wow, no offense guys, but was I the only one who wasnt blonde about the Manwich? lol, I've never touched the stuff, but I know what it is . Funny joke too .... I had heard simalar but dont think I've heard that one specifically. Xan

Yea, it sends both names...that way, she convienently recieves the name of the person who fell for it and the name(s) of their crush(es). Otherwise, if it just sent the names of the crushes, she wouldnt know who liked who. Yep.

Well you said the only one I could think of....Concrete Angel......that song is soooo sad! The music video is even sadder!! I cry like everytime I see that...

Well as all of you know, Lorena is a decietful bitchy whore. Well even though she hates me like I hate her, she always has me on her list of people to send random crap or links to. Today, I get an email from her that was also addressed to like 20 other people to a crushcalculator.com. I didn't think anything of it, and when ever I come across those, I check to see how much the logic in the html code feels Justin and I are compatible. Well this particular one claims that it can tell you compatibility ratings for up to 3 people at a time, but I didnt think much of that, or that there was a number combo in the url. I type in my name and Justin's name and am about to click go when I decide to see how compatible it says Justin and Lorena are first, because those two are like the least compatible couple I've ever seen. So I type in her name as "my name" and Justin's name as the crush's name. I click go and it says: Ha! You've been fooled by Lorena! Your crushes' names have been sent to Lorena's email: lorenasemail@emailhost.com! !!!!!! Can you imagine what would have happened if I had typed in Justin's name under my name!!! OMG!! GEEZ...She hates me and tries her best as it is to break up me and his bond, and believe me that would not be my favorite way to come out to my best friend that I love . I guess I could have tried to say something like I had done it before and just typed that in to mess with Lorena's head, but I dunno.. Yup, God is with me.... I'm gonna send the webmaster of that site a piece of my mind, believe me!

Happy 20th Birthday Julien ! Xan