Poor Man's Son - 24. Chapter 23

July 25, 2000

Paris, France

Will

I’d stayed upstairs for another half an hour or so after Gathan left, just enjoying being in this city surrounded by millions of people, yet still refreshingly alone. The solitude was soothing and let me calm my mind. My happiness was diminished by the hunger pangs that kept getting stronger. How typical, I thought, that for every pleasant thing in my life, there has to be a counter-irritant. I surrendered to the hunger and went downstairs to eat.

I wasn’t expecting the scene that awaited me when I got there. Everyone looked worried except John, who looked pissed off. “What’s going on?” I asked, as they all stared at me.

“Kristin is on her way back home,” John said to me rudely.

“Why?” I asked naively.

“It seems she went up to the patio and found you and Gathan making out. That bothered her just a little bit. I can’t imagine why,” he snapped, then pushed past me and out of the kitchen.

I just stared at everyone. I didn’t know what to think. It had just been a kiss. It wasn’t entirely innocent, but it wasn’t like I was sucking his dick. Then it dawned on me what this meant. Gathan was obviously head over heels in love with her. He’d just been dumped by the woman he loved, and it was my fault. “Kristin saw us and she left?” I asked, hoping it wasn’t true.

“Dude, you were making out with her boyfriend,” Darius said in a scolding way. “How slutty is that?”

“Fuck you,” I shot back. “It was just a kiss. He was being nice to me. It was a friendly gesture.”

“Did you use your tongue?” he taunted.

“Enough!” Robbie said. “We have enough to worry about without you two bickering.”

“I wasn’t bickering,” I said curtly. All of these people were pissing me off, and the primary reason for that was that they were right. “Fuck this,” I said, and stormed back to my room. Only it wasn’t my room, it was ‘our’ room, and the other half of ‘us’ was in there, waiting for me.

“So much for being together when we’re together,” John said in a bitchy way as soon as I walked in the room.

“You’re the one who didn’t want to be boyfriends,” I snapped at him. We glared at each other, but I was getting better at understanding myself, and I was entering a very dangerous phase. I was starting to really lose my temper, and that could be scary. I felt the control slipping away, and rather than make a scene, I just stormed out of the room, out of the apartment, and out of the building.

I started running, running as fast as I could, with no particular direction, no plan, I just needed to escape and burn off steam. I ran and ran, until I found myself at the Hotel des Invalides. I turned around and started to walk back, my head considerably clearer, only to find two of our guards breathlessly trying to catch up to me. I had to wait about five minutes for them to reach me.

“You must not run off and leave us like that,” one of them said, scolding me.

I regarded him coldly. “You are out of shape.” He got all pissed off, but that was fine, because I was in a mood to piss them off. I walked back at a brisk pace, with the two of them panting as they strode after me. I could feel their glares on my back. I tried to decide how I felt about this whole thing, but just tapping into it was painful. I’d ruined Gathan’s relationship, his birthday, his vacation, and possibly his life, over one stupid-ass kiss.

I heard the guard’s phone ring, and I heard him talking to Stefan, complaining about how I’d tried to ditch them, and whining to him like JJ used to whine to Mom when he was seven and being a tattletale. He was talking to Stef like I wasn’t there, and making all this shit up about how I was dodging through alleys trying to lose them. I turned around and grabbed the phone from his hand, glaring at him.

“Stef, it’s me. Look, I’m sorry I vanished.”

“You scared me to death,” he started.

“I know, but I was starting to lose it, and I needed to burn off some steam. I did not run down alleys, and I didn’t try to lose these idiots. If they weren’t so old, fat, and out of shape, they could have kept up with me.” I said this as I was staring the guy right in the face.

“Are you on your way home?” he asked.

“We’re going as fast as these two can go,” I told Stef. I hung up the phone and handed it back to them. “Come on guys; let’s see if you can beat me back.” They tried to stop me, but I tore off running, with them trailing behind me, trying to catch up. I stayed within range of them, so they didn’t lose sight of me, but what saved them was that I was laughing so hard at them, I kept running out of breath too. I was in a much better mood by the time we got back, although I was dripping with sweat, so I probably smelled considerably worse.

I got upstairs and found everyone in the salon, only this time they were totally freaking out. “What did I miss now?” I asked my dad.

He looked really upset and really worried. “The Concorde crashed on take-off. Kristin was booked on that flight.”

“No,” I said to him, shaking my head. Holy shit. Not only was I responsible for ruining their relationship, I was responsible for killing her.

“Will, calm down,” he said firmly. “Stef is trying to get in touch with Gathan.”

July 25, 2000

Paris, France

Gathan

She was walking toward the gate. I was about to lose her. I didn’t know what to do. Tears started streaming down my face, and I knew I was making a scene, but I couldn’t help it. My whole world was falling apart in front of me. I saw her get to the Jetway and stop. She turned and looked back at me, and for the first time, I thought I might have a chance. “Come on Kristin. You can’t leave me today. It’s my birthday, for Christ’s sake.”

“Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the final boarding call for Air France Flight 4590, service to New York,” the announcement boomed through the almost empty lounge. I looked at the clock and it was 2:25pm. Kristin stared at me, and then seemed to find some resolve, but it was the wrong kind. She turned away from me and walked down the Jetway.

I felt a hand on my shoulder, an unfriendly gesture. “You will have to leave,” a voice said. It was the haughty guy that Stef had helped me bully my way past in the first place. I thought about fighting him, but that wouldn’t do any good. I nodded in defeat and turned to leave, letting him escort me away from the gate. I’d lost her. She was gone. Once we were out of the Concorde lounge, I shook him off. “You will have to leave,” he said, this time referring to me leaving the terminal.

“I have a ticket on another flight,” I said, waving it at him. “Fuck off.” He glared at me, but left me alone. I went over to a bench and sat down, and put my head in my hands. How do you stop this kind of pain? How do you deal with the ache that won’t go away?

My phone rang, and I didn’t want to answer it, but I did anyway. “Gathan, are you alright?” Ella asked.

“Not really, El,” I said, trying not to sob on the phone. “She left. She got on the plane.”

“I’m so sorry,” she said. “Come back to the condo. We’re all here for you.”

“I know,” I said. “I just need to hang out here for a little bit and get myself together, alright?”

“Alright,” she said reluctantly. I got up and went to the bathroom and snagged a stall. I sat there, crying my eyes out, and then finally pulled myself together. As I washed the salty tears from my face I realized I had been sitting around feeling miserable for over a half hour. I walked out and started to head out of the terminal when I noticed pandemonium seemed to be gripping the airport. There were people standing near the Concorde lounge in a panic.

I saw the haughty gate agent, tears streaming down his face, so I steeled myself to go over to him. “What happened?”

“You do not know?” he asked.

“No. I was in the bathroom. What happened?”

“The Concorde crashed on takeoff. It was a fireball. There can surely be no survivors,” he said, sobbing. I stared at him, stunned. Not only had I lost Kristin as my girlfriend, I’d lost her for good. She was dead.

“No!” I heard myself scream. This man, who had been such an asshole before, guided me over to a seat and sat me down. He put his arm around me warmly, and we cried together. Kristin was dead. Such an amazing young woman, such a wonderful person, wiped out by the aberrant hand of fate.

“I am so sorry,” he said.

“I loved her,” I told him, babbling like an idiot. “I loved her so much. And I only realized it when it was too late.”

“At least you got a chance to tell her,” he said. It sounded lame, but he was trying to help. “I had several friends on that plane, the entire flight crew.”

I tried to think of something to say to comfort him, but there was nothing. “I don’t know what to say,” I said lamely.

“There is nothing to say, or do,” he said.

My phone rang, and it was Stefan. “Thank God you are alright!” Stefan exclaimed as soon as I answered. “I was so worried you would get on that flight.”

“I tried to stop her,” I told him. Talking to him about it, telling him started the tears again. “I told her, Stef. I told her that I loved her, and I begged her to stay, but she got on the plane anyway. I should have tried harder. I should have done something, anything, to make her stop.”

“There was nothing you could have done,” he said, even though he didn’t know that. “She was a gifted and charming woman. Her loss is a tragedy.” I heard his phone clunk as it hit the table, and heard him crying in the background.

“I stayed like you asked me to,” a familiar voice said. I looked up to see Kristin looking down at me, smiling, but only slightly, as seemed to befit the sadness of the moment.

“You’re alive!” I said. I jumped up and hugged her. I’m not sure she was ready for that much closeness, but that was too fucking bad. I held her so tightly I probably was hurting her. “You’re alive. I thought my world was over. I love you so much. I love you so much,” I kept rambling over and over again.

“It’s alright, Gathan,” she said soothingly. “It’s alright.” I couldn’t talk, I was just a mess. All I could do was hold her tightly and cry. “You have to let go of me. I promise I won’t run away. I promise.”

“I don’t want to,” I said.

“It’s alright,” she said again, and finally it got through. I let her go and she grabbed my phone. “Stefan?” she asked loudly. “Stefan!”

Someone must have picked up the phone, and she finally peeled herself away from me to talk to them. I looked at the Air France agent, who stood there, staring at us, totally dumbfounded. “I’m sorry you didn’t get a happy ending,” I told him. He nodded, but then started really crying, so I hugged him again, letting him cry on my shoulder. At some point, he got his emotions under control. “Thank you,” he said simply.

“Thank you,” I replied. He nodded, and walked off. Kristin looked at me, a question on her face. “He was the guy I had to argue with to get into the lounge. All of the members of the flight crew were his friends.”

Suddenly, the reality of what happened seemed to strike her. “All those people, those nice Germans. They’re all dead?”

“It looks that way,” I said. Now I was the calm one, and she was inconsolable. I led her out of the terminal, to find a very upset, but then relieved, Gilles waiting for us. “Can you take us back to the apartment?”

“But of course,” he said.

“You saved my life,” Kristin said to me after we got in.

“I almost cost you your life,” I said glumly.

“You should just agree that you saved her life,” Gilles said. “Then as your reward, you can ask her to take you back.”

I looked at her, and remembered that it wasn’t a given that she’d forgive me for not telling her about my sexual encounters with other men. “That won’t work,” she said. “I don’t think I officially broke up with you.”

I grinned, I couldn’t stop it. “So we’re still together?” I asked.

“We’re still together,” she affirmed.

“And you still want to have sex with me?” I asked playfully.

“I still want to have sex with you,” she joked back.

“Now that is certainly a bonus,” Gilles said, cracking us up.

“Gilles,” Kristin asked, getting his attention.

“Oui, mademoiselle,” he answered in French, cracking us up.

“Have you ever fooled around with another guy?” she asked. It was funny to see him get all nervous and uncomfortable.

“Fooled around?” he asked.

“You ever get off with another guy?” I asked, interpreting the slang.

“You are asking me, why?” he queried.

“That’s why she was mad at me,” I said. “She found out I’d messed around with guys.” I found that it really wasn’t all that hard to admit, but it was still uncomfortable.

“Possibly,” he said, getting even more uncomfortable than I was.

“I guess if such a handsome ladies man like Gilles can have sex with a man, it must not be all that horrible,” she said.

“You are possibly the most extraordinary woman I have ever met,” Gilles said, cracking me up.

“I couldn’t agree more,” I told her. We got back to the apartment in good spirits, and braced ourselves for the hugs and tears of everyone else as they welcomed us back into the fold.

July 25, 2000

Paris, France

Will

I stood off to the side when Kristin and Gathan got back. I’d escaped from the scene in the salon to take a shower, but I’d been worried shitless about going back into the living area. It seemed like every time I did, I’d fucked something else up, and things were worse than they were before. When we’d found out Kristin was alright, I just about shit with happiness, but it seemed like the mood of the group was that this was still my fault. They looked at me like I was a homewrecker, although maybe I was just thinking that because that’s how I felt.

They were all absorbed in this big happy reunion, but finally the initial euphoria passed, and Gathan and Kristin seemed to notice me. Kristin came over to me first. “I’m so sorry,” I said, and felt tears start to form in my eyes.

“Will, it’s alright. Don’t worry about it. We’ll talk later, alright?”

I just stared at her, amazed. “You don’t hate me?”

“Of course I don’t hate you,” she said. I didn’t get why she wouldn’t.

Gathan pulled me into a big hug too. When I didn’t respond, he pulled away. “You’re not happy to see me?” he teased.

“I’m happy to see you. I just don’t want to get you in any more trouble.”

“Let’s not make out, then,” he said. Then he whispered in my ear: “even if it was fucking hot.”

“Knock it off,” I said playfully, and pushed him away.

“I would like your attention,” Stef said loudly. We all shut up and looked at him. “This trip has not turned out like I had planned. I did not plan for an abduction, and I did not plan for a near death experience.” We all kind of chuckled at his tone, even though the referenced things weren’t funny. “I did plan on a lot of drama from young couples,” he joked. I rolled my eyes at him. “I am thinking a change in venue would be good, so I have booked us into a fabulous suite in Rome for a few days.”

Dad spoke first. “Stef, that sounds fantastic, but I think Robbie and I are going to head back. We’re going to stop in Palo Alto for a day, then head home.” They’d go see David the shrink.

“I’d like to go with you,” John said, flashing me a dirty look. “There’s a lacrosse practice I should go to.”

“I almost gave my poor father a heart attack,” Kristin said. “I think we should head back as well, if that works for you.” She shot that last question to my dad, who nodded.

“We’re up for Rome,” Darius said. “I’ll bet it’s even more romantic than Paris.”

“I doubt it,” Gathan said, gazing at Kristin.

Part of me wanted to go back, to get back to Malibu and into my familiar milieu: the surf. But to do that, I’d have to fly back with John, and deal with his shit, and with Robbie, and deal with all of his emotional drama. “I’d like to go to Rome too,” I announced. I braced myself for an argument from Dad, but he just looked at me thoughtfully and nodded.

“Dude, you’ll be like a fifth wheel,” Darius said rudely. He and Ella were still pissed off at me over the whole thing with Kristin and Gathan. It was reassuring that both of them gave him dirty looks.

“Good,” I said in a smarmy way.

“We should get going, then,” Robbie said.

“I need to talk to Gathan first,” JP said. We all looked at Gathan nervously, but he took it in stride.

“And I need to talk to you,” Kristin said, dragging me into the study. I expected her to be all pissed off, to yell at me, despite the nice things she’d said before. Instead, she came up and gave me a really nice hug.

“I’m so glad you’re alright. I don’t think I could have lived with myself if you’d been hurt,” I babbled.

“This wasn’t your fault, it was Gathan’s fault,” she said.

“It takes two to make out,” I said.

“That’s not what upset me,” she said firmly, then got playful. “Although for the record, keep your hands off my man.”

“Yes ma’am,” I said, and smiled at her.

“I didn’t know he’d been with other guys. He should have told me.”

“So you thought he was gay,” I concluded for her.

“I did. I really love him, and I thought he was playing me.”

“He wasn’t,” I said, coming to his defense. “That’s not how he rolls.”

“I know that now.” She took my hand to walk me out of the study. “I like you. You are smart, and you’re passionate. You actually remind me a lot of Gathan.”

“Hitting on me won’t work,” I teased, getting my game back. “I am gay.”

“I wonder...” she said, raising her eyebrow as she looked at me. We walked out of the study, laughing hysterically, and getting some weird looks from Ella and Darius. She went over to talk to them, while I went to talk to John. I found him in our room, packing.

“I’m sorry I stormed out on you,” I said.

“You don’t have a right to be pissed off about this,” he said, refusing to give any ground.

“I know,” I said as I sat on the bed next to his suitcase. “The guilt was overwhelming me, and it was the only thing I could do to save my sanity. I’m really sorry.”

That finally did it, calmed him down. “This is why I didn’t want to be your boyfriend anymore. It’s too intense.” I nodded. “Do you still love me?”

“Dumb ass,” I said, and got up to give him a big hug. “I will always love you.”

“I’ll always love you too,” he promised. “I guess I could go to Rome with you.” I could tell he didn’t want to.

“Dude, go do your thing. I’ll be fine. Remember I’m spending a bunch of time in Paly when Grand gets out of the hospital. We’ll have time then.” I found that I didn’t want him to be in Rome with me either.

“Cool,” he said. He zipped up his bag, gave me one last kiss, and then headed out the door.

July 25, 2000

Paris, France

Gathan

“I’m sorry to delay your departure,” JP said stiffly as we took adjoining chairs on the patio.

“It’s no problem, JP. What did you want?”

“I wanted to ask you a favor,” he said. Stef chose that moment to come gliding up the stairs. He took a chair across from me.

“Anything,” I said.

“They are working on my house, and it is pretty far along, but I’d like you to stay there when you’re in Claremont. I don’t want to interfere with your relationship with Wally and Clara, but it would make me feel better to know someone was there.”

That was a bunch of shit, and he knew it. The house had a state-of-the-art security system, and none of the stupid criminals in Claremont were smart enough to figure out a way around it. “Thanks for that, JP,” I said, letting him know that I got his game. “That was a pretty awkward scene with Wally and Clara. I don’t think I’d feel real comfortable just moving back in there.”

“That was on my mind,” he said, smiling slightly.

“You will still have to put up with construction crews,” Stef said, jumping in. “Since the room you have been using is finished, though, that should give you a sanctuary.”

“I hope you’re not offended that we’re not going to Rome.”

“Not at all,” Stef said with a smile.

“I don’t think it could measure up to Paris anyway.”

“You may be surprised,” JP said.

“I fell in love in Paris,” I told him. “It will always be special.”

“And that is perhaps the best birthday present ever,” Stef said.

“There is one more thing,” JP said, stopping me as I got ready to leave. He waited until he had my attention. “You’ve expressed quite an interest in politics.”

“I plan to major in it,” I told him.

He nodded. “You’re young and just starting college, so it’s quite possible that may change.” He held up his hand to stop my objections. “I have done this for many years, and it is not uncommon for young men to become passionate about something else. That is what the first two years of college is all about...exploring those options.”

“You make it sound so sexual, JP,” I said, flirting with him. Stef giggled.

“At any rate,” he said, brushing my playfulness aside, “Nick sees your potential, as do I. He can see you as his successor; I can see you going further.”

I stared at him, dumbfounded. “Thanks,” I said lamely. These guys had that much confidence in my abilities?

“You are an 18–year-old young man who will be living in a mansion. Remember that, for your future, you need to exhibit decorum. In fact, you need to think about that as you move forward. Some things will be forgiven; some things can sink future political aspirations.”

That made a lot of sense. I guess if I made politics my life, I’d have to be careful about my personal life. I thanked him and Stef, gave them both hugs, and then headed out of the apartment, feeling both flattered and a little overwhelmed. Living up to their expectations was going to be a challenge.