In love with my brother - 18. Chapter 18 - Nothing like home

The drive home was strangely quiet. I was looking out through the window, watching the rainfall. So much had changed in such a short time. I wondered if my life would go back to the way it was before all this. I was afraid to confront my issues, afraid to put words to them. The accident had left me scared and unsure of myself. It had been easy when I was bedridden in the hospital, but the rehabilitation had been the first step to begin my life again and something had been triggered along the way.

“Are you all right, Dom?” Anikin suddenly asked.

“No,” I choked. Anikin didn’t answer. He changed lanes and took the exit to the next rest area.

Anikin parked the car and turned towards me. His voice was very gentle when he said, “Talk to me, Love.”

I was silent for a long while before I finally found the words to describe how I felt.

“I’m broken,” I whimpered. “I feel broken, both mentally and physically. I’m a nervous wreck on the inside and — I’m handicapped.” My voice became mushy and tears started to press against the back of my eyes. With the heels of my hands pressed against my burning eyes, I continued, “I don’t think I can be fixed.” I wasn’t able to speak anymore. Anikin reached over and took me in his arms and let me cry. He didn’t speak ‘till I had run out of tears.

“No matter what happens, I won’t love you less. You are perfect to me in any way, in any condition. I’ll be here, you won’t have to go through this alone.” I nodded against his shoulder before pulling back. I felt better after having cried.

“Come here.” Anikin pulled me close again and pressed his lips against mine. “I love you.” I smiled. I loved hearing him say that.

“I love you too. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Good thing you won’t have to find out. You okay now? Then let’s get home.” Anikin started the car and drove back onto the highway.

“Can we go by the agency on the way?” I asked after a while.

“Sure.” He didn’t ask why, and I was grateful for that.

***

After fighting my way out of the car I made my way to the entrance where Anikin let us in. I slowly made my way to the right, towards the staircase.

Anikin had followed me at a distance and stood a little behind me when I stopped. I glanced up at the stairs. It all looked so much different from down here. I leaned on my crutches and closed my eyes, recalling the scene from the day of the accident.

My heart was beating like crazy in my chest just by being here. I forced myself to think of this place as safe to be. I loved working at the agency and there was no way I was going to let some crazy bitch ruin my life. I had asked for Anikin to take me here. Now I was going to face this fear of mine and get over it.

Grabbing tight onto my crutches and gritting my teeth, I let the anger burn away the fear. After a moment I felt my heartbeat begin to slow down.

“Will you tell me about it?” Anikin asked in a low voice. I took a deep breath and opened my eyes, clear resolution in my heart. Somehow, here in the dark and silence, I found the strength to let the words over my lips.

“Crazy bitch. She believed you were sexually interested in her.” I huffed with disgust.” There must have been something seriously wrong with her.” I took another deep breath and felt my muscles release the tension. I looked back up the stairs, somewhat surprised that the fear I felt just a moment ago, had faded into an indefinite emotionlessness. “She wanted me to give her your number, believing she could become closer with you. I told her off and she pushed me — What happened afterwards?” I craned my neck to look at Anikin.

“I was on my way to the elevator when I heard her scream. I found you at the bottom of the stairs —” It sounded like something caught in his throat and he had to stop.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for you to live through it again.” Anikin gave me a wistfully smile.

“I probably need the therapy as much as you.” He walked up behind me and took me in his arms. “After we’d gone to the hospital, the security personnel checked the camera recordings. The police were contacted and Tina was arrested. She was convicted shortly afterwards, although she never admitted to anything. But with the incident caught on tape, she didn’t have to.” I couldn’t help but snicker.

“You have surveillance on the stairs?” I asked against his chest.

“I have surveillance everywhere. Except for the toilets and dressing rooms of course.” No wonder everyone at work knew about us, they’d probably seen us making out in a corner somewhere. “Anyway, you won’t have to worry about her again. She’s behind bars and I cut off her parents.”

“I’m sorry,” I grumbled

“What for?”

“Because of me, you have to lay your modeling aside and work in the office for a very long time.” Anikin grabbed my shoulders, pushed me back and locked his gaze on mine, looking very serious.

“Don’t ever be sorry, none of this was your fault. The only one to blame is her. Agreed?” I couldn’t do anything but nod. “Good. Let’s go home.”

***

Anikin was very careful when he helped me out of the car back home in the driveway.

“Anikin?” I stopped halfway to the door and Anikin turned around. “Can… uhm… would you…” I don’t know why, but I needed one last confirmation that things were all right, that we were alright before I went into the house and began getting my life back to normal.

“Of cause,” he said. I looked up in surprise, how did he always seem to know what I was thinking, even before I’d said anything.

He leaned down and pressed his lips against mine. For the first time since I woke up from the coma, he held me close and kissed me with the passion I loved so much. I let go of my crutches and grabbed on to him.

“I love you,” I whispered against his lips when he pulled back.

“And I love you,” he answered as he touched his forehead against mine. He bent down and picked up my crutches, before helping me up the steps to the front door. He locked us in and we entered the house.

I didn’t make it further than the end of entrance hall before I almost fell on my ass with surprise.

A loud “Welcome home!” greeted me as everyone I knew jumped out and yelled. For a moment, I was mentally frozen. I looked around at everyone. Familiar, smiling faces reflecting nothing but love and care, surrounded me. Even so, I had to fight with feelings of anger and disappointment. All I wanted was to be alone with Anikin, I’d missed him so much. He was the only person I wanted at the moment, the only one I needed. I wasn’t even sure I could endure so many people at the same time.

I felt a hand against the lower of my back and next, Anikin’s hot breath and soft voice in my ear.

“I’m right here with you. It’ll be all right.” He kissed the edge of my ear and guided me forward. The first one to come forward and hug me was Sean, tears of happiness running down his cheeks. And then I realized, my time in the hospital had been just as hard for everyone else as it had been for me.

***

The evening went on forever. Everyone wanted to talk to me, wanted to know if I was fine, how my recovery was going. I felt somewhat grateful that so many cared about my well-being, but I didn’t have the energy to worry about everyone else’s needs. I tried to move from corner to corner, hoping to blend in with the background, but I never got more than a short minute’s break before someone else was over me.

“Are you all right, Honey? Come have a seat, you must be exhausted.” I gratefully took Mom’s help when she came to my aid. She led me to the corner with the Japanese table and helped me down so I could sit on the edge. “I’m so happy that you’re out of the hospital and in better health. I was so worried.” She was stroking my head while she talked. I leaned my head on her shoulder and closed my eyes. I was so tired and it felt so nice.

“Maybe you should come home with us for a while,” she suddenly suggested.

“No,” I answered with a smile on my lips, “I want to stay here. This is my home now, Mom. We already discussed this.”

“But I can take better care of you at home. You’ll have a better recovery there.” She kept stroking my hair. My brows furrowed, I didn’t have the energy to have this discussion with her now—again.

“Mom, I’m not going home with you,” I sighed, “I like it here where I live. And Anikin is perfectly able to take care of me.” I straightened and moved away from her.

“But he has so much work…” She reasoned.

“No. I didn’t try to stop you from being happy when you married Tom. Even though I despised him at the time, so don’t you dare try to take away my happiness.”

“Dominic, you’re brothers. It’s not natural,” she said. She didn’t seem disgusted, just sad.

“We’ve been together for almost a year and it’s not going to change just because you keep claiming we’re brothers — we’re not, not anymore. We’re lovers. And by the way, it’s none of your fucking business.” I clumsily fought to get back on my feet.

“Dom!” Mom stood to help me but I pushed her away.

“Get off of me!” When I finally got up I made my way back to the others and ran into Tamaki.

“Dom, you don’t look so good. Are you all right?”

“Can you please tell people to go home?” I asked and limped on without expecting an answer. I knew he would do as I’d asked, and already before I reached the bedroom, people were beginning to leave.

I finally closed the bedroom door behind me. The frustration almost made me scream. I threw my crutches on the floor in need to vent some of the anger. I wobbled and almost fell, but managed to grab the wall to steady myself.

Braced on one leg, I tried to unbutton my shirt, but my fingers were shaking. Angrily I started to pull it, causing myself to lose balance again, this time falling on my ass.

“Argh!!” The outburst helped somewhat, only now I just felt like crying. With the shirt pulled halfway over my head, I sat there in the middle of the floor rocking back and forth, not knowing what to do with this feeling of despair.

I heard the door creak open.

“Dominic, what are you doing?” Anikin gasped in concern. He kneeled in front of me and gently pulled my shirt off the rest of the way. He carelessly tossed it aside and pulled me into his arms. As soon as I was there the tears started to fall. I nuzzled further into his embrace, wiping my eyes on his shirt, just wanting him to hold me tighter.

“Now what? Everyone went home,” he finally said.

“Good,” I grumbled in satisfaction. I didn’t care a dime.

“At least let me take you to bed,” Anikin said and pulled back, I pouted not wanting to move.

“Mmh, fine.” Anikin helped me up and took me to the bathroom. When I was refreshed and clean he took me back to the bedroom and slowly stripped me of the rest of my clothes.

“You enjoy this a lot, don’t you?” I asked amused when he was on his knees undoing my pants, while I was holding the top of his head for balance.

“Of course, I do,” he answered looking up at me as he pulled my sweats down, he leaned forward and placed a heated kiss on my hipbone over the edge of my boxer shorts.

“Mmmmh,” I moaned, wanting him to continue, he didn’t.

“I always enjoy undressing you.” His gaze was flirty but not sexually insinuating. He looked down, his smile faltering. “Does it hurt?” he ran his fingers along the fifteen-centimeter-long surgery scar on my thigh.

“No, just sore.” He looked back up at me shortly, before sitting back on his heels, still caressing my leg. “Let’s not dwell on it anymore, Anikin. I just want to feel happy being with you tonight.” I grabbed his hand and pulled him up. I smiled and looked at his t-shirt, then back up at his face.

“My turn?” I asked quietly.

“Help yourself.” I slowly and clumsily pulled his t-shirt up. He assisted me in pulling it over his head and as soon as it was off I leaned in. Closing my eyes I breathed in the smell of him. My arms went around his waist as I kissed his chest, then I hugged him tight and relished in the feeling of his bare skin against mine. Anikin pulled me towards the bed and onto his lap as he sat down. He tugged me into a tight embrace and buried his face at the nape of my neck.

“I missed you so much,” he mumbled against my skin. “Thank you, for not leaving me.” He held me tighter. I equally hugged him to me, wishing to comfort him.

“How could I ever?” We sat there for a while without saying anything. “Can we go to bed, Anikin? I’m exhausted.” Anikin helped me down from his lap and onto the bed. While I climbed under the duvet, Anikin stripped off the rest of his clothes, before joining me. When I was finally in his arms again I thought to myself ‘I can’t possibly be happier than this.’ before falling asleep. At the time, I sincerely believed that.

***

At some point I slowly became aware. The blackness blocking my vision and the emptiness around me dead silent. I noticed the smell of Anikin and I believed to find myself in bed with him when I opened my eyes, only, my eyelids didn’t respond.

With a gasp, I sat up. I couldn’t breathe. The panic caused adrenalin to pump through my body, keeping me from thinking straight. Anikin had woken up and took me in his arms.

“Shh, Love. Breathe, I’m here. It’s okay.” He whispered as he stroked my hair. Very slowly I got control back over my body and I could finally draw air into my lounges. Sobs began tearing through my chest and tears of relief rolled down my face

“I thought … you weren’t … It wasn’t …” I couldn’t form a coherent sentence that would describe how I’d felt.

“It’s all right, you’re here. It’s over.” When I stopped crying Anikin eased me back down onto the bed and in his arms and I soon fell back into a deep dreamless sleep.

***

I slowly came back to the surface from the depths of my sleep. A moment went by as my brain started to work again. I had my arm slung over Anikin’s torso and it slowly moved up and down in time with his breathing. I snuggled closer and breathed in his scent. For a moment, I just lay there, listening to his heartbeat as the sound chased away the remnants of the nightmare earlier.

I slowly opened my eyes and noticed the bright light that made its way past the edges of the curtain. Anikin normally didn’t sleep for this long and the thought of him having had as many troubles sleeping alone at night, as I’d had while in the hospital, crossed my mind. ‘He must have been exhausted’ I thought grimly.

I hugged him a little tighter, kissed the side of his shoulder and started to caress the bare skin of his chest with the tip of my fingers. After a while, Anikin started to stir and goose bumps rose where my fingers trailed.

“Mmmh,” Anikin rumbled with pleasure. Suddenly, he sucked in a breath and rolled towards me. His bewildered gaze met mine just a moment before he took my head in his hands and kissed me. He hoisted himself up over me and kept kissing me ‘till we were both out of breath.

“Are you okay?” I asked worried while caressing the soft skin at the side of his ribs. Anikin rested his forehead against mine and took a deep breath.

“I thought it was a dream. For a moment, I thought I was alone again and had to go see you at the hospital.” He pulled back and met my gaze.

“I know how you feel,” I answered with a reassuring smile. He kissed me again, this time slower. He took his damn sweet time but I happily obliged. Abruptly he pulled back groaning.

“Come on, better get out of bed.” He quickly rolled around and rose from the bed, all of a sudden in a hurry to leave the room. Despite his effort, he didn’t leave fast enough to avoid me getting a glimpse of his erection as he rushed out the door.

I lay back down with a silly grin on my face and I couldn’t stop the joyful giggle twirling past my lips. It felt so nice being back home and things back to normal, or almost normal. The doctor had strictly said not to overexert myself, and unfortunately, sex fell under the category of exerting activities.

‘Maybe blowjobs don’t count.’ I pondered over this thought while I dressed. ‘No. bad idea. We probably wouldn’t be able to stop there.’ I pushed the matter aside and reached for my pants.

***

Two weeks later my mom came to pick me up for the hospital check-up.

It had been a calm two weeks. Anikin was slowly starting his work back up, he wasn’t doing full time yet, since I was still in the need of his help at home. He had taken a leave while I was in the hospital, so for the sake of his own body, he was now taking it nice and easy.

Mom and I were both silent in the car, but as she pulled into a space at the parking lot she sighted.

“Thank you, for letting me take you today,” she smiled and looked at me.

“Of cause, you’re my mother. Besides, you’d worry sick and start pestering me if I hadn’t let you,” I said, brushing it aside and got out of the car. I had practiced walking in between my rehab appointments, and now I only needed a single crutch for support. I was so very proud of myself.

“I’m surprised though,” Mom said, “That you didn’t want Anikin to come along.”

“Nah, we’re good. I’d rather he didn’t come actually, he’s fussing too much. He’s worse than you were, at times. Besides, he had work so he couldn’t go.”

Once in the waiting area, the half hour wait until my name was finally called, felt like three. Before I went to see the doctor they ran a few tests to see if I had any mental or bodily casualties they hadn’t expected.

“So, Dominic, all of our tests came back positive. Everything is just as it is supposed to. How have you been feeling since getting back home?” The Doctor asked when we were finally called in to see him.

“Well, last week I was mostly tired, slept a lot. But I have been feeling better these last couple of days. I have more energy in general and the soreness is gone. As long as I don’t stretch the muscles in my leg too much, I barely feel a thing.”

“How about dizziness? Nausea?”

“No, not at all.” The door to the office went up and a nurse poked her head in.

“Well, I think everything is good then. I’ll make you a new appointment in two months’ time, for another checkup. Keep a healthy diet and begin some light exercise as part of your rehabilitation, small walks and such. However, stop if you feel any discomfort at all.” The Doctor grabbed a piece of paper and scribbled down the date he’d selected for the next check-up.

“How about sex?” I blurted.

“Dominic!” Mom exclaimed.

“What? I’m in a healthy relationship, one would want to know.” I shrugged her off and turned to the doctor.

“I don’t see why not, just don’t overdo it,” the doctor smiled. He got up, an indication that I was off the hook, and showed us out the door. “I’ll see you again in two months Dominic. Have a nice day — the both of you,” he smiled at Mom before shutting the door behind us.

Mom and I drove home in silence, but a peaceful silence. Mom helped me out of the car and into the house before she left. I’d offered her coffee but she had some work she needed to finish at home.

***

I walked into the kitchen and stood in the center for a moment, indecisive. Then I walked over and opened the fridge and pulled out ingredients. Anikin should be home soon and I might as well start dinner.

“I’m home,” Anikin announced about an hour later. “Mmm smells good” He poked his head around the corner to the kitchen.

“Welcome home.” I smiled at him from my spot by the chopping board. Anikin disappeared back out the hallway again.

“How did it go at the hospital?” he called.

“Fine. The doctor told me to start exercising, I just shouldn’t overdo it.”

“That’s good.” He entered the kitchen and walked right over to grab hold of me. “Mmm. But no overwork. Go take a seat and I’ll finish dinner.” I couldn’t help but chuckle, it was hard to take his command serious with it mumbled in between kisses.

“I don’t think, making dinner counts as exercise though.” Even so, I abandoned my half-chopped cucumber and hoist myself up on the counter bar at the other side of the kitchen.

“How was your day?” I asked.

“Busy,” he answered and leaned onto one foot. His hip dipped and drew my attention to his ass, distracting me somewhat from our conversation. “Although, it wasn’t too bad. I’ve been sitting down for half the day, listening to people talk. Quite boring actually. How did your mom take the trip?” His chopping hand slowed and drew my attention back to where it should be, I knew what he was thinking.

“She was happy that I let her take me. I think it repaired some of the trust between us.” Anikin seemed relieved by that and continued cooking in silence.

None of us had said anything for a while. The stew was cooking on the stove and the rice cooker was buzzing in the corner. Anikin walked close by me to grab the plates from the cupboard. I grabbed his arm and pulled him to me, locking my heels under his buttocks. I pressed my lips to his, taking the lead right from the start. Anikin wasn’t late to respond and calmly let me kiss him.

“Love, I need to set the table.”

“Food can wait.”

“Dom.” Anikin pulled back, “I don’t think — it’s too soon.”

“Bullshit.” I pulled him back into the kiss, ignoring his protests. Then I grabbed a handful of hair at the back of his head and pulled so I could look down at him, “The Doctor said I could. You’re out of excuses.” My voice was low and husky, and apparently, something in my gaze turned him on big time, cause his eyes darkened.

“Sex counts as exercise, doesn’t it?” he asked.

“I guess…” I leaned in and kissed him again. Simmering stew and rice in the cooker forgotten, as we heatedly made out.

“Bedroom, now. I need these clothes off you.” Anikin pulled at the hem of my shirt, pulling me closer and kissed me greedily. He grabbed hold of my buttocks, abruptly pulling me off the counter.

Once inside the room he pushed the door shut with a foot and slammed me rather hard against the wall. With room to move his hands, he started pulling at my clothes.

“Dammit, why are you still wearing these?” he rasped desperately. I didn’t respond, only pulled at my shirt, trying to get it off without falling. As soon as my chest was bared he was at my nipples, licking, pinching, biting. His roughness made my cry out, it hurt, but the sensation which followed made it all the more pleasurable.

Anikin suddenly turned us around, walked three steps and threw me down on the bed then stripped himself off his shirt.

“’Don’t overdo it’, what the hell does that mean.” He was mumbling to himself as he stripped off my pants, then my boxers and sucked me in. He swallowed me all the way to the hilt without warning. I cried out in pleasure and had to fight my orgasm when he swallowed around the sensitive head. The blowjob he gave me was fast and intense, and when he forcefully shoved a slick finger into my pucker and found my sweet spot, I was beyond the point where I wondered when he’d found the lube. Two more bobs of his head and I groaned in ecstasy as I came.

Anikin pulled out his finger and slowly pulled off my dick. I was lying silently on the bed, still shaking with the aftershocks of my orgasm. He started kissing my overheated skin gently, starting at my hip bone and working his way up, softly, and gently. When he reached my lips, it was a gentle but passionate kiss, and the taste of myself on his tongue only made it all the more intense.

As I slowly returned to reality, I noticed something was off.

“Anikin…” I opened my eyes and breathed in, “I think something is burning.” He looked up at me questioningly.

“Shit, the stew!” The sight of him hurrying out the room like that naked, ‘when did he lose the rest of his clothes?’ — was hilarious. I prayed nothing had been set on fire.

“How about ordering pizza?” Anikin said when he entered the bedroom again.

“Later,” I said, reaching out towards him as he climbed back into the bed with me. He lay down beside me. His hand started to wander as he kissed me again. His fingers drew a path down my body, starting by massaging my earlobe, then continuing down to feel the beat of my pulls. They made a slow descent down my body, down towards my hips and groin, passing, down my thigh, just to started the journey all the way back up.

“Anikin…” I gasped and pushed my hips up towards his hand. He ignored my request and just continued upwards. Despite just having had come my dick made an attempt to harden again.

“Shh, let me feel you.” I groaned when he pinched my nipple on his way, “We’ve got all the time in the world, and I want to do this slowly, really slowly.” He cupped my head and kissed me again as he rose over me. His mouth took the same route as his hand had just, sucking, licking, nipping. When he reached my belly button he placed my left leg over his shoulder, giving him better access to my groin and my thigh.

When he began his journey back up his finger penetrated me once again. I moaned loudly and twisted my hips at the feeling of him inside of me, earning a very pleased sound from Anikin. He kissed the hilt of my now hard cock and let his tongue slide up over it, ending with a kiss at the tip before continuing his way upwards.

“Anikin… Please,” I moaned and thrust my hips again.

“I’m working on it,” he whispered and slid in another slippery finger before continuing to massage my sweet spot.

“I think…. I’m gonna,” I gasped and grabbed onto his lower arm.

“Go ahead and come,” he whispered against my nipple and slid in a third finger.

“Ah… hng… I don’t want to, not till you’re in me, please.” Tears of pleasure were rolling out as I begged him to grant my wish.

“It’s been a long time, Love. I don’t want you to hurt”

“I don’t care I just want you, now, I’ve waited long enough.” Anikin pulled out his fingers and moved between my legs. The intense gaze he gave me as he pressed some lube into his hand and rubbed it onto his cock, made me burn inside. The sight was so damn hot and I think he noticed, ‘cause he smiled and bit his lip as he stroked himself slower.

“You don’t own any modesty, do you?” I groaned.

“Not when it comes to you.” He leaned over me, kissing the skin of my chest as he lifted my hips up with his left arm.

I slid my hands through his hair just before he started to penetrate me. I felt the tip of his member slippery against my pucker. Slowly he started to enter, stretching the muscle. Anikin paused as soon as the head was in, I shook in anticipation, wanting him to keep going.

“It doesn’t hurt, go on.” Anikin continued ‘till he was buried in me to the hilt. The sound I was making was so foreign, even to myself, that I for a second didn’t believe it was mine.

Anikin had been right, it did hurt, some, but the pleasure of finally having him in me was greater and he barely had his full length shoved in before I came again, quivering with pleasure underneath him as he held me.

“Damn, Dominic. You’re gonna make me crazy. You’re so sexy when you come.” I looked up at him in a daze and smiled. I wasn’t quite satisfied yet so I put my feet down on each side of him, grabbed his neck and twisted my hips.

“Move” I ordered him, and he happily obliged.

You could say that he slowly threw me around in bed. It didn’t matter that we kept going so long Anikin had to stop a few times to keep himself from coming, it was heavenly, I’d miss this so much.

“Anikin, I’m gonna….” I felt the build yet again.

“Hold it, baby, not yet.” Anikin pulled me up so that I was straddling him, allowing him to penetrate deep. His hands were on my buttocks, controlling the pace and my movements, it felt so good.

“Anikin…” I was at my edge.

“NO… not yet.” His panting became more ragged, but I wasn’t going to last.

“DAMMIT, come already, I can’t…” I squeezed tight around him and thrust my hips faster and finally sent him over the edge and I let go, coming together with him.

Anikin’s hands were squeezing my flesh so hard I suspected I’d have bruises in the morning, as he came, groaning his release against my shoulder. Anikin tipped forward, pushing me back onto the mattress.

We were both sweaty and sticky but I didn’t care at the moment, I was satisfied and spent, and very, very tired.

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