December 10, 1985

Paris, France

“Notre-Dame,” I said to the cabbie, just to get him on his way without having to give him my address. My mind was running in all kinds of different directions, making it hard to figure out what the fuck was going on. I wondered if Neil was dead, if I had killed him. I paused to consider if I would feel bad or even feel a little bit guilty, but those emotions didn’t emerge. If Neil was dead, good fucking riddance. I’d be glad that he was gone.

My mind shifted to the conversation Neil had had with whoever was supposed to abduct me. I suddenly realized that I had no clue how big Neil’s posse was, and what resources they had. I did know they were after me, and that he had set up some plans to kidnap me. Neil wasn’t stupid, so even though the first attempt had failed, they probably had back up plans. I had no idea what I was up against. I forced my mind to think, to focus, and I remembered the one clue Neil had inadvertently given me. He was supposed to meet someone at the Luxembourg Garden. I had to go there, to see if I could spot the other guy; otherwise I'd have no idea who was involved.

“Luxembourg,” I said to the driver.

“But you said Notre-Dame,” he said, pointing at the cathedral.

“I changed my mind. It's not your fault,” I said soothingly. He grumbled and whipped down a side street.

He dropped me off at the Luxembourg, and I tried to remember where Neil said he would meet this guy. I wandered around cautiously, staying out of sight. I was about to give up hope when I saw a guy over by a park bench near a fountain. He looked familiar. I glanced over, making sure he couldn't see me, while I studied him until I finally recognized him. It was that guy Neil had been rubbing up against at the party in Princeton when I’d gone down to visit Robbie. I looked at him and almost laughed out loud. No way could that guy have nabbed me by himself. I wondered if there were more of them. Were these people amateurs, or not?

I walked away from the guy, making sure to stay out of sight, since there was no use letting him see me. I strode out of the gardens, trying to decide what the fuck to do. I had people who wanted to kidnap me, I'd maybe killed their psycho leader, and I’d snuck into an apartment and listened to Robbie fuck his ex-boyfriend. Could I even tell Robbie that I was there, and that I’d maybe killed Neil? My logical mind kicked in and I grabbed a cab to head home. It was possible that Neil’s stooges were there waiting for me, but I didn’t have a choice. I had to go home. I'd just have to be careful.

Being careful forced my mind to transition to security. I resolved to make that my priority, to arrange security for all of us to ensure that we were safe in Paris. The cab pulled up to our building; I paid the fare, then I looked around carefully before I dashed in.

I walked up to the concierge, feeling like I had reached an oasis of safety. “Was anyone looking for me?” I asked.

“No,” he said. “No one has been here.” I was almost surprised by that until I realized that if someone was coming to abduct me, they wouldn't just stroll in through the front door and ask to be buzzed up.

“If anyone else asks for me, do not let them up,” I said.

“Of course,” he said. He pulled out a card to confirm the names of those of us living in our condo. “If they are not on that list, they will not get past me.”

“Thanks,” I said, then I told him that I wanted to get my locks changed. He didn’t look at me like I was a paranoid freak; he just pulled out his phone book and called a guy he knew. He promised the dude would be there within an hour, thus earning himself a massive tip.

I went up to the condo and walked around warily, wondering if someone was lurking in there. My security beat was interrupted after about half an hour when the locksmith showed up and changed the locks. I knew I was getting paranoid when I let him talk me into putting additional deadbolt locks on both doors. It only took him an hour to do it, but I was glad he took his time because I kind of liked having him there, someone to protect me. It was at that point that reality hit me and I felt like a total pussy. The only member of Neil's posse I'd seen so far was a douchebag, a dude I could beat the shit out of even if I were wasted. I flopped down on the couch, pissed at the whole situation. The anger grew inside me until it became an irrational rage: rage at Robbie for fucking Neil, rage at Neil, rage at that asshole friend of his, and rage at this whole fucking situation.

There was a knock at the door, and since there was no announcement by the concierge, that meant it should be someone who belonged here. I looked through the security glass in the door and saw Mouse looking back at me, even though he couldn’t see me.

I opened the door and we just stood there staring at each other, our eyes on fire. I knew that feeling and so did he, because it was he same feeling we'd had when Billy died. I grabbed his shirt and pulled him into the condo, slamming and locking the door behind him. I silently took him to my room and ripped off his clothes, then mine. He stared at me, baring his teeth like a growling dog, so I spun him around, slapped his ass hard, then pivoted him so he landed on the bed on his back. I snarled at him as I put on a condom and lubed up my dick, then without any foreplay I drove my big dick into him. He drove his ass back into me just as hard, as if trying to prove to me that he was fucking me and I wasn’t fucking him. We went on like that with an energy and rage I'd never experienced before.

He started stroking his dick urgently. “You're gonna make me cum, you fucking asshole!” he shouted at me.

“Take it, you motherfucker,” I yelled back and started exploding into the condom. Rope after rope of his cum flew across his chest, almost bathing his body. When I was done I wasn't tired like normal, but I was calmer and more centered. I smiled at him, and he smiled back.

“Thanks,” he said affectionately.

“Come on, Mouse, let's take a shower,” I said, and led him into the water. I gently washed his short thin body (thinner than it had been when he’d been in high school), caressing him with a kindness that was in stark contrast to the way I’d fucked him. “Lots of shit has been going on around here, man. I was really about to lose it. Thanks for helping me. Just like after Billy, you saved my soul.” He smiled up at me.

“And you saved mine.” We dried off, and waited until we were dressed to resume our conversation.

“So what brings you here?” I asked.

“I wanted to make things right between us,” he said. “And then I want to try and make things right with JP.”

“Things weren't wrong between us, Mouse. Besides, JP made Robbie and me promise to watch out for you, to welcome you if you came back.”

“He said that?” I saw a tear in his eye, but he controlled it. “He would. What a fool I was! I can't believe I let him get away. I can't believe I pushed him away.”

“Why did you do it?” I asked, because that seemed to be incredibly self-destructive.

“This fucking disease plays with my mind,” he said, shaking his head sadly. “One minute I want friends and family around me, the next I want to be alone and self-destructive.”

“So where did you go? What did you do?” I asked.

He smiled, uneasily. “I've been staying at a hotel, and I've been fucked by half of Paris. With a condom,” he added. “None of them cleared my, uh, head like you just did.”

I smiled and blushed. “It's probably not cool to fuck my father's boyfriend.”

“I think he'll forgive us.” Mouse said. He was probably right.

“We're going back to the States soon. You should come with us.” I offered.

“I will if JP doesn't mind me flying with you,” he said.

“I think he'll be OK with it,” I said soothingly. “You need to get your stuff and move back into your room.”

“I don't want to impose,” he said.

“Impose?” I asked, then laughed. “Wait until you see the young stud I got for Marcel. You'll spend your time looking through the keyhole into their room.” He laughed, and I laughed with him. I felt better, but some of the rage was still there.

He left to go get his stuff and check out of his hotel while I went into JP's study and called Escorial. It was early there so it was no surprise that JP was still sound asleep. “Hello,” I heard him say groggily.

“Dad, it's me,” I said in a clipped way. “I’m sorry to wake you up, but I need your help.”

“What's the problem?” He asked. He sounded tired and mildly irritated, but my words had made him alert.

“Neil is in Paris. I overheard him plotting to have me kidnapped,” I said, knowing that would freak him out.

“What is Neil doing in Paris?” he asked.

I sighed. “He's here to blackmail Robbie. He's using my safety as bait to try to get money from him.”

“Well, we will remove the safety issue from the equation. Get some security. Call these people,” he said, giving me a name. “They helped me out with Armand's father.”

I jotted down the info. “I'll call as soon as we hang up.”

“I'll be there as soon as I can.”

“Thanks, Dad. Sorry to put you out like this,” I said, ramping up what would have been a long-winded apology.

“Don't worry about me; just be careful,” he said, cutting me off. “Now call that number.”

I wasn’t in the best frame of mind to call the security company. Mouse was getting his shit. God only knew where Robbie was. Marcel was at school, and Lou was presumably at school too. I felt like everyone I loved in Paris was scattered out on the streets, very dangerous streets, and I had absolutely no way to protect them. In my paranoid state, it wasn’t a tough sell for the security company to convince me that we should have a guard on site. After a long, tedious sales pitch, I finally cut the guy off so I could agree with him. I sighed in annoyance at the concept of having some dorky guard hanging around all the time.

I heard a knock on the door, and since there was no phone call, I looked before opening the door. I had barely released the latch when Robbie burst in, so panicked he looked almost insane. “You changed the locks? You throwing me out?” he asked.

“Nope. Here's your key,” I said, handing it to him. “I just wanted the place to be more secure.” He looked at me funny.

“Are you OK? Did someone try to hurt you?” He was beside himself.

“I’m fine. Why don't you tell me why you're so upset?” He was freaking out, but I was supremely calm, hoping it would rub off on him. I wasn't sure if I was pissed at him or not. I mean, he fucked Neil, but he did it to protect me and he didn't let Neil fist him. I knew now why he was upset and why he'd been such a dick. Neil had been driving him crazy, and had probably been annoying as hell even before he'd really put the screws to him.

“If I tell you, you'll just think I'm crazy. You won't believe me; you'll just get pissed off. You'll hate me.” He really needed to get a grip.

“No, I won't.” I said it so definitively I think I surprised him. Or maybe it was my sincerity that convinced him, sincerity that came from already knowing what had happened.

“Neil is in town. He's been trying to blackmail me for money, threatening to have you kidnapped and tortured. He claims to have a whole gang. So I'm freaking out, trying to figure out who they are, trying to figure out if he's a threat or just full of shit, and trying to figure out where I'm going to get $75,000 to make him go away.” I noted ruefully that he didn't mention that he’d fucked Neil.

“So you saw him?” I asked, and managed to keep my face devoid of expression. He nodded. “What happened?”

“He wanted to, you know, fist me.” He blushed and he was so adorable I couldn't help moving closer to him, putting my arm around his shoulder. He thanked me with his eyes for the gesture. “I didn't let him. I didn't even want to. I mean, I think about it once in a while, but if I do it again, it's going to be with you. If you still love me.”

“I love you,” I said reassuringly. “Go on.”

“He told me that I had to fuck him and give him $50,000 tomorrow.” He gulped. “So I fucked him. I'm sorry, Brad. I didn't want to. I mean that. I don't know why you would believe me. I mean, I'm telling this story and I don't believe me. And then when we were done I heard a door slam. Some guy had snuck in and taken pictures of us. Then Neil jacked the price up to $75,000 and threatened to show the pictures to you.”

I looked at him, wondering if he would have told me about fucking Neil if there weren’t the threat of the pictures turning up. I pushed that aside and gave him major kudos for being honest with me. “I know you. I know when you're telling the truth. You are,” I said. He got a big grin and gave me a huge hug, just clinging to me. I felt like a total fraud even as I stroked his back lovingly.

“I'm so sorry, Brad; I should have told you right away when he got here. He was driving me fucking crazy: calling me, threatening me, showing up at the studio. He took some pictures of you around the city to show me they could get to you.” He just collapsed into me. He was exhausted. This had really taken its toll on him.

“It’s okay,” I said soothingly.

“I don’t know why you’d even believe me,” he said.

I gulped, then took the plunge. “I was there.”

“What!?” He stared at me, confused. “You were where?”

“I was in the apartment when you fucked Neil,” I said. My voice sounded like a monotone recording. “I heard the whole thing.” I didn’t tell him I’d watched him, because that would be too uncomfortable for both of us.

“You were following me?” he demanded.

“I was,” I said, with a hint of defiance in my tone. “You were acting all weird, and you wouldn't even stay around to talk to me. That really pissed me off. I saw you running off down the street and I followed you.”

I could tell it bothered him that I'd followed him, but he had no grounds to give me shit about it. He sighed and nodded. “No wonder you believed me.”

“I would have believed you anyway. I told you: I can tell when you're lying or telling the truth.” That seemed to bother him a lot, that I could read him when he was trying to pull one over on me. Good. “I fucked up today.”

“What did you do?” he demanded. I stared at him and raised my eyebrow, silently reminding him that he'd fucked Neil. Just as I was about to tell him about Mouse the doorbell rang. He got this really pissed off look that made me laugh.

“I'll be back,” I said, both of us frustrated by the interruption.

The visitor displayed an ID from the security company. I opened the door and found myself face to face with The Hulk. “I am Claude, from the security service,” the hulk said. I stared at this guy's massive muscles. Shit. It was hard to get beyond them to figure out if he was cute or not.

“I am Brad Schluter, and this is Robbie Hayes. We both live here.” I turned to Robbie. “I hired Claude to provide some security for us. I need to fill him in on who to watch out for, and who's safe.”

“Fine,” Robbie said.

I handed Claude a list of the five of us who would be around. “Marcel and Lou won't be home until later, but Mouse should be back any minute.”

“Mouse? Mouse is back?” Robbie asked. I looked at him and nodded, and a thought flashed between us. He looked at me sadly because he knew.

“Yeah. Let me tell you about it,” I said. Robbie just nodded, then turned and headed to the bedroom. “Claude, give me a few minutes, OK? Make yourself comfortable.”

“Certainly,” he said, smiling at me knowingly. I felt a slight blush pass over my face.

“So you fucked Mouse?” Robbie asked as soon as I came into the room and shut the door. “Brad, he's fucking HIV-positive.”

“I used a condom,” I snapped. “Are you telling me that Neil's pure as the driven snow?” I wasn't going to take any shit from him about this.

“No,” he said, the guilt oozing from his mouth.

That calmed me down and I softened my tone. “Remember that time that I fucked him after Billy died? It was like that. He was really pissed off and kind of crazed, and so was I. Fucking calmed us both down. It happened; it's over; it's not happening again.”

I could tell he was confused, that he was working all of this through his mind like a computer would process data. He sighed, which told me it was time for the output. “We both fucked up. Let's move beyond it.” I hugged him.

“Good idea. Have I told you today that I love you?” I asked.

He smiled. “Later you can show me instead of telling me.” He saw that I was still worried about something. “What else?”

“Well,” I gulped. “I got in a fight with Neil.”

“Did you hurt him?” he asked. It was almost funny that he didn't ask if Neil hurt me. Neil was such a pussy.

“Yeah.” He stared at me. “He opened the closet door. That's where I was hiding. He saw me and I pushed him back into the bathroom. He fell and hit his head on the toilet. He stood up and tried to take a swing at me, but I jacked him pretty hard first and knocked him into the wall. I'm not sure that he was conscious when I left.” I didn't tell him about turning on the water.

“Good. I'm glad you did. I fucking hate that guy,” he said. I tried not to smile. Of course, if Neil was dead, he might feel differently about my actions.

“Let's go get to know Claude, wait for everyone else to get home, then go to bed early.” He kissed me and led me out to the family room where we updated Claude on who to look out for.

It was kind of funny because when we'd first finished talking, I was still pissed off and irritated, and so was he, but as soon as people started coming home, our moods correspondingly improved. First Mouse returned with his things, then Marcel and Lou came home and admired Claude's muscles. We ate dinner and had a really great time. I kept looking at Robbie, and he'd look back at me, giving me a knowing gaze that said it was time to go fuck.

As soon as dinner was over I grabbed his hand and dragged him off to the bedroom, locking the door. We both grinned as we deliberately took off our clothes and got into bed. I grabbed a bottle of lube and lay on top of him, kissing him, moving against him, thrusting our bodies together. I moved my mouth down and inhaled him, his smell, his musk, working his dick, his balls, his taint, and then his ass.

I grabbed the lube and greased up his ass and penetrated him with one finger, then two. He relaxed and moaned, lying back, surrendering himself to me, trusting me, giving me complete access to his body. I worked the third finger in and moved in gently to stroke his prostate.

“Oh God, I love it when you do that!” he cried. “Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Fuck yeah.” He was almost yelling, making me snicker. The guys were going to hear him. I refocused on his ass, stroking, probing, massaging his prostate while he just went fucking nuts. I put my head on his stomach, kissing his abdomen and feeling him tense his muscles as he rocked and writhed into my fingers. “Fuck, Brad, you're gonna make me cum. You're gonna make me cum so hard, baby,” he screamed, and then he started shooting.

I guess he hadn't been too into Neil, because he sure shot a big fucking load. I moved aside and just watched his dick blast wad after wad of cum across his body. He was panting so hard. “Fuck me now,” he said.

“Now?” I asked. I was surprised because he had just blown his load.

“NOW! Fuck me!” I pulled my fingers out and slipped on a condom, then drove into him. “Yeah, that feels so good, so good,” he purred. I didn't know if he was acting or not, but I didn't care because I was totally focused on my own needs. I didn’t last long, because the sight of him lying there, grabbing his ankles, all covered with his own cum, was enough to send me over the edge. I roared like a lion as I filled the condom in his ass.

I stopped panting and looked down at him. He grinned. “What?” I asked.

“I love being with you,” he said.

“I love being with you too.” I responded.

December 12, 1985

Paris, France

I sat down at the kitchen table with an idiotic grin on my face. I knew why and so did Mouse. I had just finished an amazing night, a sexual marathon that left me tired but completely invigorated.

“Someone got laid last night,” Mouse teased.

“I sure fucking did. Damn.” He laughed at me.

“Morning,” said Robbie when he came in, grinning like an idiot, then trying to hide his expression only to have it reappear.

Mouse started cracking up. “You two look like two love-struck teenagers,” he said.

“Close. I just fell in love with this guy all over again,” I said to him. Robbie leaned in and kissed me to say he loved me too.

We had just moved into the family room when I heard the doorknob jiggling. I looked at the two of them with a question on my lips, wondering silently who was there. I followed Claude to the door and opened it, finding myself face to face with JP and Stef. I felt my face break into a huge grin. I hugged Stef first, a nice warm hug, and then JP, a long hug, the kind we had where we exchanged energy. This time, he strengthened me.

As Claude returned to his usual perch in the side room, where he would watch the door, I led JP into the family room. “I have a surprise for you.” He and Mouse saw each other at the same time. I saw JP stiffen, his emotional shields rising to full force. Stef and I looked at each other knowingly, while Robbie put his arm around me protectively and lovingly.

Mouse looked at JP, his eyes telling JP that he'd fucked up, that he loved him, and begging JP to forgive him. He walked around the couch and up to JP, standing right in front of him, then put his arms on JP's shoulders and linked his hands behind JP's neck. “I'm sorry. I really am. I let this disease fuck with my mind and cloud how much I love you.”

“You hurt me really badly,” JP said candidly. Stef raised his eyebrow at that.

“I know. I know I did. You offered me a second chance before. I turned you down. Give me that chance again. Give me that chance and I'll make you happy for as long as I can.” I watched JP's shields shatter, layer by layer, and then his arms were around Mouse, and their lips met in a beautiful kiss. Stef had tears in his eyes, while I rolled mine at him, expressing disdain for this sentimentality, even though I had tears in my eyes too. JP took Mouse's hand and led him back to their bedroom.

“Well, we will not see them for a while,” Stef said. “And how are you doing?” he asked Robbie.

“I want to get the fuck out of here. I want to go home.” I just stared at him.

“You don't want to stay?” I was really surprised, since we'd been arguing about this.

“No. I've got a bunch of projects to turn in, and then I'm done. It's time to go home.” I saw Stefan cringe slightly, but he was otherwise composed. Why did that bother him? Christ, sometimes all of these people and their issues just got old.

“Why don't you get it done, and then head back here and we'll see when we can leave,” I said. “Take Claude with you.” He gave me a dirty look while I stared at him firmly. He finally shrugged, a French gesture that we'd all adopted, and headed to campus with Claude, his portfolio case under his arm.

After he was gone I turned to Stefan. “What's on your mind?”

“What makes you think something is on my mind?” he asked. I looked at him, ignoring what he’d said, waiting for him to get serious. “I want you to consider moving to LA.”

“To LA?” I asked.

“Well, actually to Malibu,” he said.

“Why?” I asked.

“I want you to work with me. I want you to be my apprentice, to learn about my business so you can take over some day.”

“Wow,” I said, completely dumbstruck by that offer. I had thought about working for Stef, but assumed I’d start out at one of his companies. I’d figured the most likely place for me to work would have been for Carruthers & Schluter, his venture capital colossus that was based in Los Altos. “I’m sorry. I’m pretty shocked by this. I figured that if you let me work for you, you'd want me to wander around and work in the ranks.”

“If I let you?” he asked. “You are kidding, surely?” I smiled at him.

“Thanks Stef. That's an amazing offer, and I know it would be fun,” I said. “Let me talk to Robbie about it, OK?”

“Consider it,” he said as he smiled at me. He acted like he thought I'd say no, which was mind-blowing. Who in their right mind would turn down an opportunity to be Stefan Schluter’s apprentice? The only question was whether I could talk Robbie into it. He was planning to go to school at Berkeley. Would he be willing to give that up?

I changed the subject and told Stef about the whole encounter with Neil, including the part where I turned on the water. “I don't know if he was conscious when I left, Stef. What if I killed him?”

“You do not know that you did,” he said in his soothing way. “You must relax and be calm. Besides, even if you did, they would have to prove it. You must keep your mouth shut, and your face impassive.”

“I can do that. I’ll just pretend I’m JP,” I joked, then got more pensive. “When I think about him being dead, I'm not sad. And when I think that I may have killed him, I don't feel guilty. But when I step back and think about him not as Neil, but as a human, it makes me want to puke.”

“We do not know if he is alive or not,” Stef said, ignoring my moral dilemma. “Has there been anything on the news?”

“I haven't checked,” I said. I picked up the remote control and turned on the television, then navigated my way through the French television offerings to find the news. It wasn't on for another ten minutes, so we kicked back and just watched the end of some idiotic French talk show.

The news came on and I was kind of ignoring it until I saw Neil's picture on the screen. “An American visiting Paris was found dead in the flat he had rented in the Latin Quarter. The cause of death was unknown, but foul play is suspected. Police are trying to determine if the death was murder or suicide. The man, a Mr. Neil Gardner, was seen with many different men in the city, some of whom police believe to have been his lovers.”

“Well, one question is answered,” Stef commented ruefully.

“They will come looking for me,” I said, sounding panicked. I calmed myself immediately.

“How will they know it was you?” Stef asked logically. “Only you and I know it was probably you.”

“That's true, unless someone saw me leaving his apartment,” I said, and then the panic returned. “God, Stef, I killed a guy. I murdered someone. Robbie will know it was me. What is he going to say?”

“I think that you are worrying before you need to, but I think it would not be a bad idea for us to have a lawyer available, just in case,” he said. “You know who we should consult?” I nodded, and he went off to get JP out of bed.

Now that he was gone, I was free to think, to really contemplate what I had done, which of course gave me the freedom to freak out without Stef to calm me down. As I thought about all the possible problems I could be facing, the dominant emotion I felt was fear: fear of what Robbie would say when he found out, and fear that he wouldn't love me anymore because I had committed murder. I was afraid that he would hate me, and that overwhelmed me to the point that there were tears flowing out of my eyes.

“What's wrong?” I heard Robbie's voice, as he sat next to me. I had been so involved with my thoughts, I hadn’t heard him return.

I just shook my head, trying to brace myself for the news I had to give him. “Neil is dead. It was on the news. They will be looking for his killer.”

He stared at me with pretty much every emotion flowing across his face, but the one he landed on was anger. He was really pissed off at me. “What are you crying for? You hated him. That’s pretty fucking hypocritical.”

I stood up and looked down at him. “I'm not crying for Neil; I'm crying for us. I was sure when you found out he was dead and that I killed him, you would hate me. Losing you would be worse than going to jail.” He just stared up at me, and seemed shocked at how tortured and confused I was. I headed to our bedroom, wondering if he’d follow me, if he could even bear to be around me. I collapsed on the bed, totally drained.

I felt a hand on my back. It made me jump, because once again I hadn't heard Robbie come in. “He pushed both of us to the breaking point; you just broke first. I don't hate you.” I pulled him onto the bed and lay on his chest, refusing to look at him, afraid that his eyes would tell me his words were a lie. My emotional exhaustion took over, and I just lay there until I fell asleep.

I was woken up by someone knocking loudly on the bedroom door. “Brad, open the door,” JP said. I stared at Robbie as he woke up too, then jumped out of bed and opened the door. JP stood there with Stef behind him, both of them looking worried.

“I'm sorry, Dad, I was asleep,” I said, yawning. “What is it?”

“The police are here,” he said, projecting his urgency and concern onto Robbie and me. “They want to speak to Robbie.”

“To Robbie?” I asked. Why would they want to talk to Robbie when they should be arresting me?

“Yes,” he snapped. “Don't keep them waiting.” Robbie swallowed and headed out to the family room with me right behind him. We found two police officers with dour expressions waiting for us.

“You are Robert Hayes?” One of the police officers asked.

“I am,” he said.

“I would like to talk to you about the death of Mr. Neil Gardner. Do you know him?” he asked.

“I do,” Robbie replied.

“Is it true that you and he have an extensive romantic history?” he asked.

“We did,” Robbie said.

“Is it not customary for Mr. Hayes to have a lawyer present while he is being interrogated?” JP asked politely.

“You are familiar with French law?” the cop asked rudely.

“I am not,” JP said, but the cop’s attitude had changed his tone to one of defiance with a bit of snark. “That is why I am asking.”

The cop eyed him with disdain and then grinned, but it was an evil grin. He said nothing to JP and instead focused his attention on Robbie. “Robert Hayes, I am placing you under arrest for the murder of Neil Gardner.” He pulled out a pair of handcuffs and turned Robbie around, putting one on each wrist.

“Robbie,” JP said. “Say nothing, absolutely nothing.” Robbie just stared at him blankly because he was totally in shock. “Did you hear me?” JP demanded.

“Nothing,” Robbie confirmed, nodding for emphasis.

I walked up to him, daring the cop to say something to me, and gave him a brief hug. “I love you,” I whispered in his ear.

“I love you, too,” he whispered back.

“Your lawyer will be with you shortly,” JP said to Robbie, then turned his ire on the cop. “I am certain, monsieur, that you and I will meet again soon.” The cop stared at him weirdly, and then he and his partner led Robbie away. The look on Robbie's face as he was led out was strong and firm. He mouthed the words “I love you” to me, and then he was gone. I turned to look at JP but he was already gone, talking furiously on the phone.

“Stef, I have to confess that I did it,” I said to him. “I can't let Robbie take the fall for me.”

“You must be patient and see how this evolves,” he said calmly, but it was easy to see the concern behind that facade. That took my mind down an entirely different path. Would my family be so focused on looking out for me that they'd be willing to sacrifice Robbie? I tried to discount that and I couldn’t. Would I let them do that? The answer to that question was easy. There was no fucking way Robbie was going to jail for a crime I committed. I would never be able to live with myself if I let that happen.