No going back - 32. Colin 11: Visiting Mum

There was just one weekend before they went off to Italy, so Colin had presented his Mother with an ultimatum. He and Owain wanted to come up, so it could be on the Sunday afternoon. They'd arrive after lunch and stay for tea.

It turned into just another Sunday, Colin labouring in the garden under his Mother's instruction. He'd already done a few jobs in the house; she'd had a list and for once there had been no messing about. He'd been able to get on with it - a stop cock that had seized, a dripping tap, a loose shelf. That sort of thing.

Then they had wandered around the garden, with his Mum pointing out all the big stuff that needed doing, as well as moaning that Miles had not come round much and had proved useless in the garden. This was quite a surprise turn up, Colin couldn't remember the last time Miles had so comprehensively fallen off his pedestal.

Now Colin was happily pottering around, whilst his Mum and Owain were sat on chairs outside the house, chatting away. That was the bizarre thing, his Mum seemed still to be a bit in two minds about the new Colin, and you felt that on the rare occasions when she used the word gay, it came firmly with quotation marks around it. But she wasn't as sharp with Owain, and the two seemed to be having quite natter.

The two had started with the basics, where Owain was from and all that, and Colin had tuned it out. His Mum was pumping Owain for the sort of information that she didn't know how to ask Colin. Owain had said to Colin that his Mum would still be getting used to the idea of Colin being gay, they certainly couldn’t talk about it in the way she might be more open with Miles and Annalisa. But it hadn't stopped her quizzing Owain, and he'd happily told her stories about his family, his Dad, growing up and all the other stuff. Finally, it had come to the money.

"Did Colin tell you about the money from my grandfather?"

"Not really, Money you say?"

So, Owain had sketched in the Glennister history. Listening to him recounting it, even though Colin had been involved, it still seemed to be more like a novel than real life. Colin noticed that Owain was careful not to mention amounts, and besides his Mum was far more struck by Owain's Father's behaviour, in fact his parents’ behaviour. Almost forgetting about the money, she circled back to the way Owain had been thrown out when he was 18. It was a long way from Auntie Anne comfortably rambling about her grandson's gay brother-in-law and how lovely it was that he was comfortably settled.

Colin knew that there would be some sort of inquisition from his Mum, it was inevitable. As long as it didn't turn into a lecture. Owain offered to go in and make tea, and his Mum came over to where he was working, ostensibly to talk about long term plans for some of the bigger plants, and what might need severe pruning or thinning in the Autumn.

"Why didn't you say anything?"

The question was asked apropos of nothing, but Colin knew exactly what she was talking about. "For God's sake Mum, because I didn't know myself. I spent years pretending that either I didn't like guys or that it was a bit of harmless fun."

"But still. You could have said."

"And what would you have done, eh? Turned round and said it was a bit of nonsense and that I'd settle down, like Miles did", Miles had famously been something of a ladies' man whilst at University, having a succession of women in his life and presumably in his bed. "Miles has already told me off and said that I can't be queer. Not everyone's like Owain, knowing early on. I was scared and worried what you might say. Worried what everyone might say. We don't exactly have a lot of gay blokes round here, do we. And besides, we never talked about my life, it was always what was going on here. I set up the business, and it hardly ever got mentioned."

"Miles said…"

"Look Mum, it always came down to Miles. If that's the way it is, then fine. But I'm happy, Owain and I are getting settled. It's been a bit more up and down than planned, what with his health, but maybe that's for the best. Ordinarily, I'd have been a bit scared of going in full-on, but with him ill and not doing stuff, we sort of got started quicker. And I'm happy, Mum. It's taken a long time, and most of that's down to me, not you. Get used to the idea."

She stared at him, quiet and thoughtful. She didn't really have a come-back about talking about his life. Apart from the recent visit, she'd never come down to see him, had never seen the house and any comments about the business were soon brushed aside.

"I reckon the best thing to do is to start from now. Less of your nagging me about why I never said earlier, and I'll put everything behind me too. At least, we'll try. Right. Owain and I will pop down every few weeks, to do the stuff you can't manage. If you can't stay on top of the garden, then perhaps we should think about getting someone to come in and help."

"Folk never do what you want."

Colin gave a snort, "And Miles does?"

"Mmm. I'll give it a think."

"Doesn't have to be a proper gardener, maybe one of the folk in the village or something has a grandson who wants to earn a bit of money, you could show them what to do?"

She nodded, "It's a thought. And what you said, I'll give it a try. It's a lot to get my head round."

"I know that, Mum. I've been trying to get my head around it since I was a teenager, so it'll take time."

"Thing is, Miles and Annalisa had a big row the other night. Think she got him to sleep in the spare room."

"Bloody hell."

"Mmm. They haven't said much, but since we came to see you, I think she's been less inclined to put up with him."

"You think…"

"Not for me to say is it", she sniffed, "but he's a fool if he doesn't make an effort to get things back together."

---

"Well, how did it go?"

They were driving back, and the motorway was horribly busy. Colin considered what had happened, "I think she's having trouble getting her head around it. She went on about why I'd not told her earlier, and I said we needed to try and start things again. Thing is, Annalisa and Miles have had a barney."

"Wow. About his opinions about you or what?"

"Don't know. Mum either didn't know or wouldn't say. Suspect he was an arse about Annalisa seeing us."

"If they knew we were coming down this afternoon that might have caused problems too."

"You mean him saying she couldn't see us?"

"Or her forbidding him to come and lay down the law. Will you say anything?"

"Not likely. Best left alone. I'll keep Mum posted. Thought I'd try and keep a diary whilst we were away and then I can put some descriptions with the photos."

"Lots of photos of the two of us having fun", Owain smiled.

"Hope so."

There was no real news by the time they went on holiday. Colin had had an email exchange with his Mother about what might need doing in the garden in August, and she'd commented that Evelyn's grandson Stewart was coming round to help with some of the more routine things. Colin could place Evelyn, she was one of the women at church, but he'd no idea of her grandson. He had sent Annalisa a note about visiting his Mum, but she'd been quiet too.