Window Stories - 18. Chapter 18

Stanley seemed to become more relaxed as we talked. When he first sat down, he crossed his arms and hugged himself tightly. Now, he had leaned back and put his arms around his head. He would laugh anytime Colin or I made a joke.

Colin rose and headed inside for some sodas. I think the real reason was because he wanted to see if Jason had left for the day. When he walked into the building, I leaned toward Stanley and said, “It’s really going to be okay. I know things are tough right now, and you don’t see any way out. But trust me, I’ve been where you are now.” Tears began to fall from the boy’s eyes. “My father rejected me, too.”

“But why?” he asked tearfully.

“I don’t know,” I replied. “Maybe it has something to do with their past, the way they were raised. They just can’t seem to see past the sex and see the real person.”

“But he’s my father,” cried Stanley. “He hit me because I’m gay.”

I took Stanley’s hands and gripped them tightly. “You have to move on, Stanley,” I said as tears filled my eyes too. “You’ve got support that I never had. You have your mother who loves you dearly.” Stanley placed his head in his hands and wept loudly. “Colin and I will be here if you need us. What happened is unfortunate, but you can’t let it destroy you. I just met you, and I can tell that you are a wonderful young man. You have a bright future ahead of you.”

I stood and pulled Stanley to his feet. “Let me give you a hug,” I said tearfully. Stanley leaned forward, hugged me and cried uncontrollably. Colin returned and saw us. He put the sodas down and hugged us both. All three of us were crying. After a minute, I pulled away and looked into Stanley’s tear-filled eyes. “Feel better?” I asked with a smile. “Sometimes we just have to let it all loose.”

“Yeah, Mr. Reid,” he replied as he wiped his tears off with his sleeve.

“Please, Stanley,” I said. “Call me Pops, okay?” He smiled as Colin gave me a puzzled look.

“Okay, Pops,” replied Stanley as he hugged me again.

Colin handed us a soda, and we sat back down. I looked at Stanley and asked, “Tell me, do you have a boyfriend?”

He frowned and replied, “I did, but his parents won’t let him see me anymore.”

“Are they aware he’s gay?” I asked.

He laughed and replied, “Oh, yes.” I looked at Colin, and he slightly shook his head. I then recalled him telling me about the boy who ran away with Stanley. I remembered him mentioning that he had been crowned homecoming king, or something like that.

Colin interrupted and suggested that we change the subject, but Stanley objected. “I want to talk about Marshall,” he insisted. “We’re in love, and it isn’t fair that we can’t see each other.”

“Why?” I asked.

“Marshall and I had been seeing each other for several months,” he began. “Then, he was crowned the homecoming king at school. We went to see a movie the next night, and a girl from our school saw us holding hands in the theater. She went back and told everyone. She outed both of us.”

I asked, “Is that why his parents won’t let him see you?”

“No,” he replied sadly. “When I got in a fight with my dad and ran away, I called Marshall to tell him what happened. He wanted to help me. I told him no, but he left his house, and we hid out for several days. We found a shed in the neighborhood that was unlocked. We got hungry, so I went to a convenience store and stole some food. I got caught, and the cops were called. Marshall saw what was happening, and he tried to save me, but we both got arrested. I got locked up, but Marshall was allowed to go home.” He began to cry. “I haven’t seen him since we got arrested. I don’t even know if he wants to see me anymore. I’ve called his phone, but he doesn’t answer it. I think his parents may have taken it away. I know he would talk to me if he could.” He buried his head in his hands and cried. I looked over at Colin, and his eyes were wet with tears.

Stanley looked up hopefully at me and asked, “Pops, what can I do? I love him.”

I looked over at Colin. Again, I was going to place another burden on him. “When Colin takes you back later, why don’t you give him Marshall’s address. Perhaps, he can visit his home and talk to his parents.” I looked at Colin and he rolled his eyes. Reluctantly, he nodded his head.

He said to Stanley, “I’ll see what I can do.” When Stanley stood and hugged him, Colin looked over his should and mouthed, ‘Thanks.” I winked at him and smiled.

I looked at the door and saw Susan come out. She walked over to us with a smile. “Are you boys behaving yourself?” She reached up and mussed Stanley’s hair.

“Mom!” he squealed. “Stop that!” She pulled him into a hug and held him tightly. “No matter how old you get, you’ll always be my little boy. If I want to mess up your hair I will.” She pulled away and tried to muss his hair again. He stopped her by hugging her tightly. Susan had tears in her eyes when she pulled away and smiled.

“We better be going,” announced Colin. He looked at his watch. “It’s getting late.”

Stanley giggled and asked, “Can I meet your boyfriend before we go?”

As if on cue, Jason came out and walked over to us. When we all started laughing, he reached down to see if his fly was open. It only made us laugh harder. Colin introduced him to Jason. Stanley seemed awestruck by Jason’s good looks. Even Susan noticed and warned him to back off. “He’s got a boyfriend.”

Stanley giggled and replied, “I know.” He looked at Colin and said, “Lucky, shit.”

“Hey,” squealed Susan. “Language, Young Man.” It surprised me when Colin gripped Jason’s hand and agreed with Stanley.

“I am a lucky shit,” he said. I was worried that they might start kissing. It wouldn’t bother me, but Jason would be coming out to some of the older residents nearby who might be offended.

They walked beside me as I headed to my room. I wanted to hand my walker to Jason and try to walk without it, but I knew that I might be pushing my limits. Maybe someday I might be able to walk without it, but that might be several months away.

Colin called me the next morning, and he told me that he wouldn’t arrive until around six. He had arranged a meeting at my house with Mike and Allen. He also said he had talked to Susan. She was also going to attend since she might be moving into my house.

Jason came into my room about quarter to six. He entered with a wide smile on his face. “How are you, Phil?”

“I’m still sore from my workout this morning.” I was sitting in a chair and reached down and rubbed my legs.

He responded, “You’re the one who keeps insisting that you walk everywhere.”

“I have to,” I replied, “If I’m ever going to get out of here.”

He smiled and said, “That may be sooner than later. The resident doctor went over your health records with me this afternoon. He sees no reason why you can’t return home.”

“Really?” I asked. “I thought I would have to jump through hoops to get dismissed.”

Jason laughed and replied, “You’re not a prisoner here.”

“Mr. Maxwell said the same thing,” I said. I looked around the room and added, “I can’t say I will be sorry to leave.” I looked out the window to see if anyone had appeared, but no one did.

Jason’s eyes lit up when Colin entered the room. I always enjoy seeing them interact with each other. Their eyes are filled with so much love. I am so happy for them. Jason helped me stand, and I managed to walk to the car as he held tightly to my arm.

I smiled as I looked out the window. “It’s a beautiful evening,” I said. The sky was blue, and the temperature was mild. They agreed, and then they began to discuss a club they wanted to visit on the weekend. I hope they don’t experience the same problems Dwight and I dealt with when we went to the clubs. I always left because men flirted with Dwight. He would tell me it was innocent fun, but it still made me angry, and we would get into an argument.

Three cars were parked in the driveway. I assumed the others had arrived. Jason helped me inside. They were sitting in the family room talking casually when we entered. Susan rushed over and took my arm, helping me to the sofa. She then sat down beside me. Jason and Colin pulled up chairs and sat down facing Mike and Allen.

Mike began the meeting at once. He pulled papers out of his briefcase and handed me copies of various documents. The first thing he assured me was that I still had control over everything. He was very careful not to mention the size of my investments or the value of my home. I glanced briefly at them, but since Susan was sitting beside me, I didn’t want her to be aware of how much I’m worth.

Mike looked at me and asked, “Phil, what are your plans?”

I sat a moment before answering. I wasn’t sure what Mike wanted me to say. Finally, I said, “My immediate desire is to return home. Is the house ready for me to come home?”

“Yes,” replied Mike. “The inspector was here this afternoon. He said there appears to be no issues with the house. A maid service will be here tomorrow to clean, and I have a pool maintenance crew ready to open the pool. Is there anything else you need?”

I looked over at Allen when he spoke. “I’ve taken a few days off work. I’ll be here to supervise the opening of the house.” He looked around the room. “This is a beautiful place. I see why you want to return.” I smiled and nodded.

I turned to Susan. “I don’t want to put you on the spot, Susan.” I smiled and gripped her hand. “I hope you’ve had time to take a look around.”

“This is a wonderful home,” she said. She quickly added, “It’s so big.”

I squeezed her hand and said, “I really want you and Stanley to move in here. I’m going to need help getting settled in. We’ll work out the details later, but can I depend on you?”

Tears filled her eyes as she responded, “Yes, Phil. About the rent…,”

I put my finger to her lips. “We’ll discuss that later. Okay?”

She smiled and said, “Okay.”

I looked at Colin and asked, “What is the situation with Stanley? Can he be discharged?”

“I see no problem,” he replied. “His counselor and I met here this afternoon. She seemed quite pleased.” He looked over at Susan and asked, “Do you think you can enroll him in school? She needs confirmation that he will be attending school before his release.”

Susan nodded her head and said, “I’ll take tomorrow afternoon off and enroll him.” She looked at me with a mischievous grin. “You’ll manage without me, won’t you?”

“I’ll try,” I said as I squeezed her hand.

Mike looked around the room and asked, “Could I have a moment with Phil alone? Why don’t you all go outside and sit on the deck while we speak.” They rose and left the room.

Mike took more papers from his briefcase. “The reason I wanted to speak to you alone, Phil, is because you need to assign someone as your power of attorney. This should be done before you return home. Allen has temporary control, but it isn’t binding because it was done without your knowledge.” He handed me a pen. “Who would you like to appoint? Would you still like to keep Allen?”

I had to think. I barely know Allen. I had only met him recently. I knew I had a grandson; I just hadn’t expected to ever meet him. Could I trust him to do the right thing if something unexpectedly happened to me? “Well, Phil,” asked Mike. “Do you want to keep Allen as your power of attorney? I’ve also prepared a living will if you wish. You also need to appoint someone to be in charge of it.”

I thought a moment before answering. I asked, “Does it have to be Allen?”

“No, Phil,” he answered. “It can be anyone you appoint.”

“Then I would like to name Colin as my power of attorney.” Mike seemed surprised.

“Why?”

I replied, “I’ve known Colin for a couple of months. I trust him. I don’t know Allen. My first impression is he seems to be happy to see me. However, I know nothing about him. What if he becomes like my father once he gets to know me?”

“I can’t give you that answer,” he said. “You have to go with your gut instincts. Who do you trust to respect your wishes?” He turned the paper over in his hand. “These are legal documents, but if you are incapacitated like after your stroke, it is up to the person who signs this to respect your wishes.”

“Then, I want Colin to sign them. I trust him to do the right thing,” I replied.

“Fine,” said Mike as he rose. “I’ll go get him.” Mike returned a few minutes later with Colin. We discussed my desire to appoint him as my power of attorney. I told him I was hesitant to have Allen because I knew very little about him. After a brief discussion, Colin agreed. He also agreed to sign the Living Will. Mike explained that this might be temporary because I might one day change my mind. If I did, then I could contact him.

“Another thing,” he said. “There is the matter of drawing up a will.” He opened up a paper in front of him. He told me he had given me a similar paper. I looked at it and let out a low whistle.

“Damn,” I said excitedly. “That a lot of money.”

Mike smiled and said, “You made some wise investments. Your financial advisor said that your portfolio has doubled in value over the past couple of years. It has risen substantially since your stroke.” He leaned forward and added, “This is a lot of money. I know you don’t want to think about it, but you should decide how you want it to be distributed upon your death. If you had died from your stroke, this could have been tied up in court for years. It was foolish of you not to have a will.”

“I’m sorry,” I apologized. “After Dwight died, I really didn’t care anymore.”

He said somewhat angrily, “You should care, Phil. You and Dwight spent a lifetime earning this money. You should make sure your estate is properly taken care of.”

I felt bad because I had been careless. I just assumed that my wealth would go to Roger. I really didn’t care. I wouldn’t need it anymore. I knew Roger had a family, and my hope was he would distribute it to others. However, after learning of Roger’s view that my money was dirty, it is hard to say what might have happened to it. It would be a travesty if he donated it to causes that fought against gay rights and marriage.

“We’ll sit down in a day or two and talk about it,” suggested Mike. “You don’t have to make a difficult decision like this tonight. Give it some thought what you want to do.”

When I looked at Colin, he laughed and said, “Oh, no, you don’t.” I was certain that Colin and Jason would be the recipients of a part of my will, but I also wanted to designate family members and charitable organizations.

After Colin and I signed the forms, we decided to go outside and join the others. I had Colin order four pizzas, chips and sodas to be delivered to my home. We spent an enjoyable evening talking and enjoying the wonderful evening weather. I can’t recall the last time I felt so relaxed.

It was getting dark when a woman, two young girls and Derek entered the patio through a side gate. Allen jumped up and rushed over to them. He approached me holding the hand of the woman and one of the girls. “Phil,” he said. “This is my wife, Lucy. She smiled and shook my hand. She looked very ordinary. She was dressed in a floral dress and appeared a bit overweight. He pushed the nearest girl toward me. “This is Melody.” She timidly looked at me and then looked down at the ground. She looked to be about five. Allen waved the other girl over and introduced her as Monica. She appeared to be a few years older. Both had brown hair and brown eyes. They both looked like their mother. She wrapped her arm around them and walked away.

Allen hollered out, “Hey, Derek!” He motioned for him. “Come over here!” Derek had been gazing at the pool. He timidly approached and pressed his body into his father. “You remember, Pops, don’t you?” He looked at me and nodded his head.

I laughed and said, “The cat’s got your tongue?”

Derek gave me a puzzled look and said, “I don’t have a cat. I got a dog.”

Allen laughed and said, “He means you don’t talk much.”

“Oh,” replied the small boy. “I talk when I want to.”

I sat and stared at Derek. Allen told me earlier he was eleven years old. He was small with curly blonde hair and brown eyes. He began to fidget when he saw me staring at him. “Dad?” he asked, “Can I go over to Mommy?”

“Sure,” he replied as he pushed him away. He looked at me and apologized, “I’m sorry, Phil. He’ll get used to being around you.”

“That’s okay,” I said. “But there is something strange about him.” I started to rise. “Would you get my walker?” When he asked why, I told him I wanted him to help me into the house.

I had him go with me to my bedroom. I was tired by the time we arrived, and I sat on the side of the bed. I pointed toward the closet. “Would you see if there is a green box on the top shelve?”

Allen walked over, opened the closet and looked around. He reached above his head and pulled down a large green box. “This it?” I nodded my head, and he brought it over to me.

The box contained my past. In it were pictures and documents. Some were from my boyhood days. I had kept a yoyo and other small toys that I treasured. There were documents of my life with Emily. Inside was our marriage certificate and divorce papers. It also had my service records- my enlistment and discharge papers. There were also numerous papers and pictures of my life with Dwight. After his death, I often looked through the box and wept. One item always brought me to tears. It was a small bear he had given me one Valentine’s Day. It held a little sign that said, ‘I can’t bear to be without you.’ I would cry uncontrollably because I couldn’t bear to live without him.

I looked up when Collin and Jason entered the room. “What are you doing?” asked Colin. “We were worried about you.”

“Sit down, Boys,” I said as I motioned for them to sit beside me.

I began to pull items from the box. For the next half-hour I shared with them my life through pictures and papers. Allen wept when I showed him pictures of Emily, his grandmother. He said he had only known her for a brief time before she died. He also laughed when I showed him pictures of his father as a child. Emily had given them to me on a visit a year before she died. I showed him a picture she had given me with her and Roger. She was holding a baby in her arms. “Is this me?” he asked as tears filled his eyes.

“Yes,” I replied. “Keep it if you want.” He held it tightly in his hands as he cried.

Colin and Jason were amused when I shared pictures of me and Dwight as young men. “Damn,” hissed Jason. “You guys were hot!” Dwight had bought a new camera when we married, so there were numerous pictures of us. After we built the house, he was constantly taking pictures of parties by the pool.

I began to cry when I reached into the box and took out a picture of Dwight lying in bed. I took it about a week before he died. He insisted that I take it. I didn’t want to, and there were so many times I considered throwing it into the fireplace fire. However, I kept it in the box, and this was the first time I had seen it in years. Colin and Jason put their arms around me and comforted me as I wept.

After a few minutes, I gained my composure and began to look through the box. I had almost reached the bottom. I had shared my entire life with them. I still hadn’t found the picture I was looking for when I asked Allen to bring me to my room.

“Eureka!” I shouted as I held up a tattered old picture.

Colin asked, “What is it?”

I laughed as tears filled my eyes. I handed him the picture. “This is me when I was around eleven or twelve.” I was standing with my arm around a black boy.

“Is this Jerry?” Colin asked. I was surprised that he had remembered his name.

“Yes,” I smiled. “I was so young.” He handed the picture to Jason, and he laughed. He then handed it to Allen.

“Holy shit!” exclaimed Allen. “This looks like Derek!”

“That’s what I thought,” I replied. “The first time I saw Derek, I remembered this picture.” I took it from Allen’s hand and smiled. “He looks remarkably like me when I was his age.”

“It’s uncanny,” said Allen. He rose and asked if he could take it and show it to his wife. I told him he could, and he left the room.

I began to put the items back into the box. “Thanks, Phil,” said Colin. “This has been a wonderful look back at your life. You told me your story, but tonight it became so real.”

“It’s been a wonderful life,” I replied tearfully. “It seems like only yesterday. Time passes by so quickly.” Tears fell down my cheeks as I told them, “Live and love today. One day you will grow old like me, and all that will remain will be pictures and stories.”

I looked out the window and saw Emily and Dwight tearfully gazing inside.

THE END

Epilogue- Three Months Later

I sat in a chaise lounge by the pool. It was a beautiful Sunday afternoon. Gary was sitting beside me. Colin and Jason were sitting under the gazebo talking to three friends they had invited to join them. Susan was in the kitchen preparing some snacks and drinks. Stanley was sitting on the side of the pool kicking his feet in the water as he talked quietly to Marshall.

I smiled and thought of the past few months. I came home three months ago. Susan and Stanley moved in right after our meeting at my home with Mike. She enrolled Stanley in a private school a few blocks away. He was disappointed because he couldn’t attend the same school as Marshall. However, Marshall was now a regular visitor at our home. Colin had visited his parents, and they agreed to let him date Stanley. Susan had even invited them to attend dinner a few times. Stanley was attending school daily, and he was getting good grades. Occasionally, I would help him with an assignment he was having trouble with.

Susan’s divorce decree was finalized. Her house was on the market, but her realtor was having a difficult time selling it. Her husband, Randy, priced it so high that it wouldn’t sell. I think he did it so he could remain in the house. I considered buying it just to spite him, but Susan refused to let me. Besides, I think she is enjoying living here. She and Stanley have settled in. I don’t think she will consider leaving until Stanley graduates from high school.

I looked over when Gary asked me if I was okay. “Yeah,” I replied. “I’ve never felt better.” Gary moved in with me six weeks ago. We are sharing the mother-in-law suite. We’ve become like an old married couple. We sleep until about nine each morning. We have a light breakfast, and then we go up to the main house and prepare lunch. Susan makes a nice dinner when she returns from work. We spend our evenings by the pool or watching television.

We sleep together, but our relationship is purely platonic. We are like brothers. Gary is unable to have sex, and I don’t want it anymore. We snuggle at night while watching television, and it is comforting. I wish it were Dwight, but I don’t feel guilty. I know he would be happy that I have found someone to spend my December month with. I’m very happy with the arrangement we’ve settled into. There are no more lonely nights.

I look over at the pool when I hear boyish giggle. It is Derek and his friend, Shaun. Shaun is a classmate in school. Derek invites him almost every weekend to swim. I’ve even given him one of the bedrooms. I’ve become quite attached to him. He is no longer timid, and I smile each time he calls me Pops. I still can’t believe how much he resembles me when I was his age. There is no doubt that he is my great grandson.

I’m also beginning to wonder if Derek is gay. He and Shaun seem to be closer than just friends. I recall how I felt about Jerry the first time I met him. I see it in their eyes. When Shaun visits, they spend a lot of time in his bedroom. I think Susan suspects it too. When she is home, she insists that he keep his bedroom door open. She does the same thing when Marshall spends the night with Stanley. If only she knew that boys have a way of being together. Open doors won’t stop them. I’ve looked out my window several times to see Stanley and Marshall sneaking into the pool shed.

I met with Mike a few weeks ago to discuss my will. It was a rather easy decision. Before, I didn’t care what happened to my money and property when I died. However, now I have a family. Besides Allen, his family and Derek, I consider Colin and Jason as grandsons. Susan is a daughter, and Stanley is another wonderful grandson. I want to ensure that they have a long and happy life.

Susan and Stanley will get the house when I die. I’ve set up a college fund for Stanley, that is assuming he wants to attend college. If not, he will get a monthly allowance until he reaches the age of twenty-five. There is also a clause in the will that states that Gary will be able to live in the mother-in-law suite until his death, that is assuming that he doesn’t die before me. He will also get a monthly allowance.

I’ve provided generously for Colin and Jason, but only if they are a married couple. If not, they will receive a smaller portion of their inheritance. I want to ensure that they get a good start in life. I’ve also willed my Escalade to Jason. His car broke down two months ago, and I let him borrow it until his was repaired. He loved it so much, and he was so excited when he drove me somewhere. I may buy a new one so he will have a newer model to inherit.

In the will a generous portion of my estate goes to Allen. I’ve established college funds for all three of my great grandchildren. After much consideration, I’ve made Derek the recipient of the largest portion of my money. I feel so close to him. Perhaps, it is because of his looks, but it is more than that. He has a kind heart. I watch him interact with Shaun. He never gets upset when they play. Allen says he treats his sisters the same way. He helps them with their homework, and he never loses his patience. I just think he has a bright future ahead of him. I want to make sure that he does. What remains goes to several organizations that help the LGTB+ community. I’ve appointed Colin as my executor, so I know that he will handle things appropriately.

I look over at Gary, and he is asleep. Colin and Jason are still talking to their friends. I smiled when I noticed Stanley and Marshall exit the pool shed. Stanley’s face reddens when he notices that I have seen them. I look at Derek and Shaun. They are in the water at the other side of the pool. Their bodies are pressed up against the wall, and it appears that they may be feeling on each other under the water. They giggle and slap away the other’s hand. They then turn and sit up on the deck. They whisper to each other, stand and walk over to me. There is a noticeable bulge in both their swim trunks.

“Pops,” says Derek timidly. “I’m going to take Shaun up to my room. Okay?”

I motion for him to lean down so no one can hear me. “Susan’s in the kitchen,” I inform him. He gives me a puzzled look. I point over to the pool shed. “It might be safer if you go in there. And be sure to lock the door.”

He stares at me, and I whisper, “It’s okay, really.” Suddenly a smile forms on his lips and his eyes brighten. He leans down and wraps his arms around me. “Thanks, Pops. I love you.” Tears fill my eyes as I watch them hurry across the pool deck and disappear into the pool shed.

I look up into the family room window and see Dwight and Emily smiling down at me.

Time to wrap this baby up. Thank you for reading Window Stories. And a special thanks for being here week after week adding your comments. It made writing about Phil's journey through life enjoyable. I appreciate it very much.    -Ronyx