Confused - Until Bart Met Noah - 6. Is It My Carlo Marini?

Bart breathed a sigh of relief when he walked into the Psychiatry practice's lobby. There were photos of the staff on the wall. Carlo changed some, but there was no mistaking the bright blond hair and blue eyes. He signed in and sat down to await being called. Three minutes after one, he was summoned by a nurse and escorted to Carlo's office.

"Come on in, Bart. Take a seat."

"Thanks. I doubted there would be two Carlo Marinis in the area, and was hoping it was you. Like they say, long time, no see."

"Yeah, I'd say almost seventeen years. Did I ever thank you for handing me those few wins the year we raced together?"

"A few times, yeah. God, you were so adorable back then, I almost gave every single one to you. Coach would have caught on though. I wish I knew you were gay. I think I said we could have had some fun. Of course, I was afraid if I guessed wrong, I'd have Karl to answer to. Are you two still friends?"

"Yes, we stay in touch. He's in South Carolina. He stayed after he graduated from Clemson. Pro football wasn't in the cards. He tore his Achilles tendon his senior year and ended up using his Business Management degree and became a sports agent. He's done pretty well with it. I see him if he's in town for a client. You know what I do, what have you been up to?"

"I went to UNF after high school, stayed close to home to help my mom out whenever I could. Got a Business Administration and Management degree, I guess like Karl. I worked my way up in the hotel business and now manage the Hilton in Saint Augustine."

"Hilton. Nice. Do you still run?"

"Five miles, almost every day. Made it to the New York and Boston marathons once each. That was brutal. Took me over four hours but I finished both. After that, I figured, why climb the same mountains twice? If nothing else, I'm able to say I did it."

"That's cool. I kept it up through college. Once I got to Med school, then married, there just wasn't time. Then I got into this practice, Brandon and I adopted two kids, and now there's even less time."

"Good for you. Where did you meet Brandon?"

"He came to Rockaway High halfway through our junior year. We both went to the Jacksonville FSU campus, married when I was in Med school, and two years ago fostered, then adopted two kids who were essentially kicked out by their parents, at eight and nine."

"Holy shit. I guess they weren't very good parents."

"That's an understatement, for sure. But they're well-adjusted now. Typical tweens. Billy's ten and Carla's eleven."

"Carla? Did you get to name her?"

"No, just coincidence."

"Well, like I said. Good for you. I never got that chance. I've spent the past ten years trying to figure out if I wanted to be with a man or a woman. Then I met Noah four months ago, and I finally made up my mind."

"Better late than never. But what exactly are you struggling with?"

"Before my dad left us, I got it drilled into me that men shouldn't be together, in that way. Believe it or not, I've had more than half a dozen boyfriends since I graduated from college, but am still a virgin, as far as sex with a man goes. Yeah, I did pretty much everything else, but Noah and I have been talking about taking that final step and it scares the hell out of me. We've even had a couple failed attempts. He thought I should find someone to talk to."

"I'm glad you reached out, whether to me or someone else. I have to ask one question first. Do you love him?"

"Oh, God. More than anything. I wasn't at all close to Dad after he left, but when he died in September, it still hit me hard. Noah was there for me every step of the way. I got to return the favor last month when his sister died. Breast cancer. We've been inseparable ever since."

"So, is there something specific about anal sex that scares you?"

"Not really. It's just an irrational fear. Like I said, I was brought up thinking it was wrong. Every time it got close to that point with another boyfriend, I panicked and broke up with them. I can't and won't do that to Noah. I have to get past that. I want to make love to him in the worst way... But the couple times we tried, I just couldn't."

"Physically, or mentally?"

"I don't know. Is it possible to mentally keep yourself from getting or maintaining an erection?"

"Sure. Stress, and confidence, are big factors. A person can do almost anything if they put their mind to it. If they're not supported by their conscious or even subconscious, things other people could do with ease, could be impossible."

"That's exactly it. If we're masturbating each other, or having oral sex, there's no problem; I'm hard as a rock. We get ready to do more, and I just think 'I can't do this,' and, poof, limp noodle city."

"Definitely not physical then. Something like Viagra may help, but I think even that would fail at times. If you were fifty-four and not thirty-four, I'd be quicker to go that route."

They talked for a little over an hour in total. Carlo gave Bart some mental exercises to do, to try to undo everything his father did to him, telling him there's nothing wrong with being in love with and showing that love to another man is perfectly okay. He told him it might take a while to undo his parental programming. They set up another appointment in two weeks. Carlo felt that would give him a better chance at succeeding on his own than a weekly visit.

*************************************

Bart called Noah early that evening to tell him how the visit went.

"Hey, Hammer. How was the visit? Was it your old friend, or a doppelganger?"

"I believe a more proper term would be name-fellow. A doppelganger is a look-alike."

"Whatever. Was it him?"

"Yes, it was."

"And?"

"I think it went pretty well. He gave me some mind exercises I can use to try to rid myself of my father's influence. He did say it might take a little while to undo that, so I'll see him again, probably until that particular wall has fallen."

"Good. I'm glad you took the opportunity to talk to someone professional about it."

"Well, it was your idea."

"I'll try not to pull a muscle patting myself on the back."

"You do that. So, see you tomorrow night, like usual?"

"Yep. I was thinking, maybe you can teach me to play poker. Then some day we can go to the casino together."

"Sure. I can bring the beer and pizza, a deck of cards, and my poker chips and do that, if you want."

"Make it Chinese? Six-thirty like usual?"

"Sounds good. See you then. Bye."

Noah hesitated, then simply said goodbye. He felt the 'I love you' he was planning on adding would be better said for the first time in person. It took another month before he felt the time was right.

The next night, Bart gave Noah his first poker lesson. One of his decks of cards had an extra card with the hand rankings. Knowing those completely was a definite prerequisite. He left that behind for Noah to study. There was no point to playing poker in a casino before you at least basically knew what you were doing. It took a few lessons, but Noah was a numbers guy, so it went pretty well for him.

Another thing that went pretty well, although not quite as quickly, was Bart's progress in his sexual healing. His visit with Carlo was on December 1st. There wasn't much progress to report at his second appointment on the 15th. But, by Christmas, he was able to penetrate Noah and was almost relaxed enough for Noah to invade his own ass. His penetration hadn't lasted long yet, flaccidity, not an orgasmic cause, ended it. But they were both happy that there was indeed progress.

New Year's Eve was when Bart's breakthrough occurred. Although technically it was very early New Year's morning when he, as Bart would tell Carlo at his appointment on the 5th, made the ultimate connection to Noah.

The night started like most other recent Saturday nights, even though it was a Friday this time around. They had a late dinner; the end of the month was always crazy for Noah, so he had to work until nine. They'd made plans to bring in the new year at Eclipse Bar Riverside, an LGBTQ+ friendly night club near downtown Jacksonville. They arrived at Eclipse a little before 10:30 PM, after a simple dinner at Anejo Cocina Mexicana, which was not far from Noah's condo. It was a good time, but they had made plans to make another attempt at having sex later that night, so it was a one alcoholic drink party for them.

They left the bar at around 12:30 and headed back to Noah's. They weren't in the door more than ten seconds before they started ripping each other's clothes off. Fortunately, nothing actually got ripped. They made their way to Noah's bedroom and laid down on his bed, kissing madly. Both Bart and Noah were immediately hard. Before much thought could occur about Bart's wall, Bart prepared Noah's ass for entry. One difference was that Bart rimmed Noah, which he had been reluctant to do previously. A silent observer might have opined that Bart was extremely horny.

After a minute or so of rimming, Bart lubricated Noah's ass and his own cock. There was no stopping Bart this time. Ensuring that Noah was alright with going bareback, he slowly entered Noah, hesitated a moment once he was completely inside his lover, then started thrusting like he never had before. Which was technically true, it was Bart's first time getting this far. It only took him about three minutes, but he thrust hard and emptied himself deep inside Noah.

Not wanting to break the mood, Noah immediately began preparing Bart, also rimming him prior to adding lubrication. Bart slapped the condom out of Noah's hand when he picked one up off the nightstand.

"Are you sure?" Noah asked.

"Yes. Fuck me raw. Please, hurry, before I lose my nerve."

Noah added some lubricant to his own dick and slowly penetrated Bart. It was the first time he was able to pass Bart's sphincter. He hurried further, yet slow enough to inflict the least amount of pain on Bart. Noah lasted a bit longer, fucking Bart for nearly five minutes before exploding inside Bart for the first time. Together they groaned loud enough to wake the neighbors. Fortunately, Noah's condo was at the end of the hallway and the condo next door was currently empty, the family having gone to visit relatives for the holidays.

When Noah grew soft, he rolled off of Bart and laid next to him.

"Oh, God, Bart. I love you so much right now."

"I love you too, Nomes. Thanks for being so patient with me. I'm so happy it was you for my first time."

"You were worth waiting for. This was the best experience of my life. I want it to happen over and over again."

"Me too." Bart hesitated, then decided to ask, "Would you be against finding a place together?"

"Oh, God, Hammer. That would be so awesome. Yes. Let's do it."

Next up - "Cohabitation and More"