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    D.K. Daniels
  • D.K. Daniels
  • Author
  • 12/05/2019
  • 983 Words
  • 1,105 Views
  • 6 Comments
Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

You & I - 25. Chapter 25

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To Isaac,

Oh, You. I mean, I know who you are now. I'm sorry about your condition, I figure that sucks. Em… yeah, everything kind of make sense now. I am a little agitated that you lied, but I can see why you might have wanted to hide your situation. In a way, I am sorry for having kept talking about being able to run all over the place, and teaching you how to play sports or I don't know, like… being lazy. You said you swim, except how do you do that if you are in a wheelchair. Plus, being in a wheelchair all the time, does that mean you can't feel anything south of your hips. Em… does that mean everything below is… not working. Sorry for asking, I'm just… I feel weird grasping what I know now.

It's awkward you know, realizing how I have been talking smack all this time about being energetic and well, being able to walk just about anywhere I want. You kept dropping hints all along, about having something taken away that I wouldn't be able to understand, until it's gone, and I presume I'll never perceive what it is like to lose my independence.

Em, Isaac, it might be wrong for me to say this. Though I'm pretty sure it won't work: us being friends. You live a different life, a complicated one, and well, I live another. I don't care about your disability, per se.

What I really mean is… I don't think I can be friends with you because I have special feelings, regardless of what way you present yourself. Can I be in love with someone and not care about how they look. I'm serious, this is odd and weird. All I know is that I have a strong ripely sensation in my stomach, and it makes me feel ashamed to acknowledge who you are and still like you. I mean, what if I desired to do wild things with you, like rock climbing, how do we do that? Actually, how do you swim, do you need someone to help you all the time or can you do that yourself.

I reckon you are right about your previous statement; that neither of us would have talked to each other if it were not for these letters. I'll be honest, okay, not that I have anything against you or people in your position. Just, I don't think I can deal with something this heavy. I have enough things on my mind, and I don't want to worry extra about you when you can't keep up with my friends or me if I was to invite you out. I… I em… I… You know, it kind of sucks you know... that you are in a wheelchair if I am honest.

Somehow, I always imagined if we got together, we'd be able to do wild shit, and well I don't know what I was thinking making a preconceived notion that you could just walk based on my own knowledge. Except, now that I know I just feel guilty for being nice to you now that I know about you. I am thankful I never made fun of you, and that I never ridiculed somebody in your situation.

Only, it seems like such a shitty thing to do to such a nice person. Whenever I saw you in the corridor at school, I always assumed or asked myself at least, "what did that guy do to piss off god?”

Though now that I know you are a phenomenal person beneath the appearance it makes me hate myself for not reaching out sooner or at least trying when I knew for a fact that you seemed lonely and lost in your everyday life when I'd see you.

I think I have been too caught up in my own life to genuinely care about anyone else, and since I met you, you have opened me up to the plausibility of being open to people.

Is it wrong for me to wish the accident happened to me, rather than a grateful person like you? What I really want to say is that I can't be just a friend, and now that I know it's you, it makes me want to be helpful, yet, honestly, these uncharted waters petrify me.

Can I ask what really happened? How did it really happen? And I'm really sorry about your mom. Mom's are so much better than dad; even though I love my dad… Mom always knows. I'm super sorry about what occurred, four years ago.

Did you see the other side? I mean, heaven.

Your superhuman Isaac… you know that. All this time, I've been passing by a superhero on my way to class for the last couple of years. After what you have gone through I can appreciate why you savor the little things now that they don't seem significant when you have them to dispose of.

Plus, please don't call yourself a cripple, nobody calls you that. I didn't even know your name… I always referred to you as the kid in the wheelchair. Yes, you are the only person in the entire school, I have noticed who has a wheelchair. I understand it is not the best way to refer to someone, on just what I see, though you are totally worth the time and effort, in getting to know.

Lastly, it will never be goodbye with me. You have made it into my inner circle of besties. I'm dealing with stuff, so sorry if I am slow on the uptake, but I just need some time to think that's all. I'll let you know… you know when things are clear. I just, I wasn't expecting my best friend to be in a wheelchair. Though you are still alright in my books…

Until next time,

Max

A special thanks to my patrons: Thomas Tallis, Don Jr., Joen, John, Danny, Matt, Scott, Joshua,

*** 

For updates and a full compilation of all my work, visit my website at - www.dk-daniels.com

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Copyright © 2018 D.K. Daniels; All Rights Reserved.
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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Chapter Comments

Butcher56

It appears that Max is having trouble with the fact that Issac is in the wheelchair. Even though he said he still considered him a best friend, he has to get to a point where he can honestly say that he’s willing to help him with anything he needs. I hope that Max figures things out soon and then they could hang out together and with his other friends, even though Issac isn’t able to go rock climbing as he’s in the wheelchair that doesn’t mean that they can’t do other things. Issac shouldn’t call himself a cripple because he’s only putting himself down by doing so, instead he should say that he’s mobibly challenged. 

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D.K. Daniels
18 hours ago, Canuk said:

Well you certainly brought out the insensitivity and unthinkingness of youth! Even the last paras where he talks about Isaac being "superhuman" its all about himself .I'd like to say that  "if he reflects" but of course, what teenager reflect on anyone or anything..."😁

Great writing. Very real. 

Well for one I think kids who are not a part of any group are more susceptible to considering peoples feelings. Growing up I was a quiet kid, introverted, interested in classical music, just the way Max is. However, parts of Isaac where prevalent in myself also. The way I saw it was if you don't bother me, I won't bother you. If you treat me like civil, I will do the same. Though yes, some kids are unkind, I think there are some genuinely good kids when you get passed all the lessons that pop culture and modern day ideals have thought them. I have found folks to be more sensitive in the last 10 years, more than ever in my lifetime, but perhaps his superhuman statement was in fact referring to both. In a sense wishing he had some of the willpower Isaac had to face his own problems.

 

Glad you are enjoyed the book, again :)

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D.K. Daniels
20 hours ago, Butcher56 said:

It appears that Max is having trouble with the fact that Issac is in the wheelchair. Even though he said he still considered him a best friend, he has to get to a point where he can honestly say that he’s willing to help him with anything he needs. I hope that Max figures things out soon and then they could hang out together and with his other friends, even though Issac isn’t able to go rock climbing as he’s in the wheelchair that doesn’t mean that they can’t do other things. Issac shouldn’t call himself a cripple because he’s only putting himself down by doing so, instead he should say that he’s mobibly challenged. 

In the end they do, remember. The first book was more about setting the boys apart, and that is why I have chosen to write a second book dealing with the struggles that come with having a friend with a disability, but also the effects it has on the normal, and the friendship. When Isaac called himself a cripple I believe he said it as an reminiscent afterthought, how both boys are stuck mental and physically with a problem that neither of them have control over until they decide to move forward. 

D.K. Daniels
17 hours ago, mayday said:

Isaak's first feelings on reading this - I really do not want to be in his shoes. He will need the patience of a saint and  forgiveness itself to not be terribly hurt by Max' reactions. A very special kind of cliffhanger...

I think Isaac is quite an aloof character, meaning if he does not wish to be hurt he can remove himself emotionally when he needs to be, but still be understanding to what another person is going through, even if they where in the wrong. I assume this is something I will address in the next book, how the cause and effect of being open, but vulnerable can hurt even if it wasn't intentional. 

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