Shadow of my Father - 9. Chapter 9

BRANDON’S POINT OF VIEW)

As the sun filtered into the window and I tried to flip on the bed away from it. Still there is no use. The sun is shinning too bright into the room. I gave up trying to hide from the sun so I crawled out of bed. That is when I realized I am in my room, not Josh’s. I thought I was dreaming when Josh picked me up. I felt weird floating over to my room.

I got dressed and headed down for breakfast. Mom had already called us to eat. I really wanted to go and see Josh swim, but I know my mom was going to say ‘no’ if I asked her. I didn’t want an argument about going.

We were quiet during breakfast. No one really said anything. I think Daniel and Carlos are still down from the football game they lost last night. Not to sound mean, but they really do suck playing football. That is if you want to call what they do on that field playing football.

We started clearing the table when I heard the doorbell. I looked at my brothers and saw neither of them wanted to answer the door. So I decided to go and answer it. I know my jaw fell to the ground when I opened the door. I couldn’t believe who is standing at the front door, Elizabeth.

“Good morning Elizabeth, Josh is not here!”

“I know Josh is not here. That is why I decided to come over right now. I need to speak with your mom!”

I just looked at her wondering what she has up her sleeve. I invited her in as I yelled for my mom that the door is for her. She walked out into the hall with a look of surprise on her face.

“Elizabeth honey, it is a surprise to see you here this morning. Josh isn’t here sweetheart! Come back around two and he will be home most likely.”

“I am not here to see Josh, I’m here to talk with you ma’am.”

“Elizabeth honey, I am sorry but I spoke with my husband. He made it clear to me unless Josh is here, I can’t speak with you by yourself. After the last time we spoke here behind Josh’s back, it caused a serious problem. The end result of that is what you see right now.”

“Ma’am what I need to speak with you about has something to do with Josh, but I know if he were here, he wouldn’t let me speak with you about it.”

I looked over at mom seeing a look on her face I have seen so many times. She really wants to know what Elizabeth has to say, but because of what my dad mandated, she is pulling back. Still it looks like the want to hear Elizabeth out is winning.

“Honey, unless it involves Josh about to do something seriously stupid like rob a bank or kill himself, I can’t not listen to what you have to say. Look, just come back when Josh is here and I promise to hear you out.”

Elizabeth didn’t look happy at all. She knows that if she does that, Josh won’t even let her in the door. I should have never let her in the door, the bitch. What does she want to do, get Josh in trouble?

Elizabeth thanked my mom and said her goodbyes. I walked her to the door as my mom walked back into the kitchen.

“Elizabeth the more and more you come around and try to get Josh into trouble, the more you are making my dad your enemy. He may not be here right now, but he will be back. When he does, he will be down at your house talking with your parents.”

“Little boy, stop acting as if you’re the man of the house while your dad is gone!”

“You know Elizabeth you are one piece of work. What I hear Bernice say about you is true. You are a bitch of high standards. Stop coming around here because we will no longer let you in. If we find out you came here when none of us in here, I promise you will regret that decision. So make this your last time visiting our home.”

Elizabeth just looked at me stunned. At that point she walked out to the porch of the house so I just shut the door right when she was about to say something. That felt good, but at the same time I had a weird feeling this isn’t the last we will see of Elizabeth.

I walked back into the kitchen to find my mother standing at the doorway. She doesn’t look happy at all with me.

“Brandon we don’t treat anyone like that in this house. The way you talked with her and then slammed the door in her face, that isn’t right!”

“Mom she has no right to be here anymore. The only reason she is here is because she can’t let go of the fact that Josh dumped her. Now I see why he dumped her. In every turn she tries to get Josh in trouble.”

My mom just looked at me not saying a word. I know she is thinking about what I just said about Elizabeth.

“Plus mom, you know what dad has told us all. We are not to speak or take sides when it comes to any of our relationships. Both sides polish up their sides of the story to look like the victim. Elizabeth is the worst. Did you know she actually attacked Bernice the other day coming over to the house?”

My mom looked stunned with what I just said. “No I did not know that. What do you mean by attacked? Did they just yell at each other or did it actually get into a fist fight kind of fight?”

“She didn’t even give Bernice a chance to defend herself right off the bat. She snuck up behind Bernice and pulled her by her hair to the ground. The rest is what you would suspect from a girl fight.

Now you are entertaining the notion of listening to the woman that is trying to break Josh and Bernice up at every corner. What is she going to say now? Josh is ditching class and doing the bad with Bernice? Mom, she is as trustworthy as a politician!”

“Ok Brandon I understand what you are saying and promise you I won’t invite her in unless Josh is the one bringing her. I didn’t know this is going with Elizabeth and I don’t condone this kind of behavior from anyone.”

With that I kissed my mom on the cheek. I needed to get to Josh and tell him about what is going on. I asked my mom if I could see the final events of the swim meet. She had no problem with it.

Just as I headed out, Carlos stopped me. “Brandon I will make sure that bitch of an ex won’t step a foot in this house. I wouldn’t want an ex of my doing this to me. So I will defend my brother from her as well.”

All I could do is nod my head in the positive. I am surprised that Carols is willing to come to Josh’s defense. It seems they are mortal enemies. That is no fault of Josh’s. It is our older brothers that choose to be this way with Josh and me.

When I got to the pool, the meet is already halfway done. Our school is in the lead as far as how many races we have won. I grabbed a seat to cheer my brother on. He is about to be tagged in. It looks like our school is behind.

Josh got tagged in and he right away got off. The crowd started screaming for Josh to catch up. I don’t know how he does it, but he somehow he not only caught up to the other swimmers by the time they hit the wall on the other side but by the time they were almost at the starting wall, Josh had the race won.

I sat there cheering on not only Josh but every one of our school swimmers in the pool. I noticed Chris sitting down there with the team. I noticed every time Josh got up and walked to the pool or got onto the diving broad. Chris not only looked at my brother, but he looked at him with total love in his eyes and not a hint of lust.

Elizabeth is right about Chris. I wonder if Josh knows that Chris likes him. I looked around to see if anyone else is noticing what I am. Lucky for Chris no one is looking at him. So they don’t see him looking at my brother.

The next thing I saw stunned me to my core. Josh got up to stretch from the last team event of the day. As he stretched he started looking at Chris through his legs when he was bent over stretching. I know Josh is mouthing something to Chris because Chris is smiling.

Could this be true? Could my brother like guys? If so, is the guy he likes this one? Chris isn’t a bad looking guy at all. In fact he is pretty handsome if I do say so myself. I just never thought that Josh could be gay.

(JOSHUA’S POINT OF VIEW)

I just love being around Chris. Ever since he wrote me the letter, I can’t stop thinking about him. Now we are alone in this storage closet kissing. I have thought of this kiss since he told me his true feelings about me.

Chris has these lips to die for. When he kisses, he knows how to use his lips! Elizabeth was an ok kisser, but she liked to eat my lips. Bernice and I really haven’t kissed like this. Chris on the other hand knows how to kiss. He doesn’t slobber all over my face. He just makes it like a moment in time that won’t be forgotten.

All of the sudden the door to the storage room flew opened. The light came in from the hall so I couldn’t see who is standing there. Then he spoke and I knew!

“What the hell is going on in here?”

I looked at Chris and could tell he is scared. I even felt him shaking. I got up to speak, but the door shut before the first words came out of my mouth. I ran out of the door to try and catch up. Lucky for me, it is Saturday and all the doors except the main entrance doors are locked.

“Ok please let me explain to you what is going on. Please let me my friend. We have been friend’s way to long for you not to allow me to explain this.”

“Josh what in the world did I see in there! Please tell me it isn’t true!”

“Eric please let me explain what you saw right now! You are my best friend and I need you in my corner, Eric!”

“If I am your best friend as you say. Why didn’t you trust me with this? We have been able to tell each other everything. Now I see you are keeping the biggest secret of all from me!”

Eric tried to get away, but I had the hallway blocked. He couldn’t escape from where he got cornered. He is angry, but not enough to hit me.

All of a sudden I see Eric look down the hall away from me. I turned to see what he is looking at. What I saw couldn’t believe. This is all I need right now. Brandon is standing there just looking at us. Right behind Brandon is Chris looking even worse than he looked when I left him in the storage room.

Brandon walked towards us with a look of confusion on his face. I don’t know what to tell him right now. I love my brother so much and to loose him now over this; I don’t think I can handle that.

“What is going on here guys? You two are supposed to be best friends. It looks like you guys are about to get into a fist fight over here in the corner!”

I looked at Brandon and swallowed hard. “Nothing really is going on. Just a difference of opinion that’s all. We are working it out.”

“What is the difference of opinion?”

I looked over at Eric hoping that he won’t say a word. Give me a chance to think of a lie. I also hope Eric will go along with the lie. Just as I am about to answer Brandon, my brother surprises me again saying; “Look Eric, if you are upset with Josh about what I think you are, you need to get over it. I saw the same thing you did. I think if we give Josh time, he will tell us.”

I just looked at Brandon with a surprise look on my face. Did he see what Chris and I were doing in the closet? If so, why isn’t he mad like Eric is? I need to know these answers because I can’t afford anyone running home telling my mom.

“Look Brandon I know you didn’t see what I saw Josh just doing. I really don’t care what he was doing. What I care the most about is that he didn’t think I could be trusted with this. Come on Josh, we have been friends since we were in diapers, well almost.”

“Eric I feel really bad about keeping this from you. I didn’t know how you would handle it. We never have talked about this kind of stuff before.

And you Brandon, what in the world are you talking about?”

“I saw the way you and Chris were looking at each other big bro! I don’t care and I won’t tell anyone. That is up to you when and if you want to talk about it with others. I just don’t understand why Eric here is getting so worked up about it.”

“I don’t care about the relationship thing. I am upset and HURT that you couldn’t trust me with it. I knew something was going on between you two. Josh, I know you too well and therefore, I know the way you think.”

“I am just confused here from both of you. I screwed up. Ok? Is that what you want me to say? I am so afraid of this, this feeling! I always thought when the day came that anyone close to me found out it would be because I told them, not my being caught.

I thought Chris and I were being really good at hiding it. I now see I am wrong on that. I will change the way we do things in the future.

Eric, please trust me when I say this: I wanted to tell you for a long time and you too, Brandon since you are the only one in the family I can trust to hold this kind of secret. Now that both of you know, I need to know where I stand. Should I move to another state for fear of being killed here?”

Both of them looked at each other then over at me. I know Brandon is accepting me for who I am. He isn’t going to tell my mother or anyone else for that matter. Eric, on the other hand, is so angry that I didn’t trust him enough to tell him about me. I really wanted to but was so afraid of his reaction.

Brandon looked at Eric and said; “Look Eric my brother is the same person as he was yesterday. Who cares who he loves? He has good taste if I can say so. But Eric you guys have been friends for a long time as you keep saying. Nothing of the friendship has changed.”

“You’re wrong on that Brandon! Our friendship has changed. Josh proved to me he doesn’t trust me. I see now we don’t have as strong friendship as I thought we did. Don’t worry Josh, I won’t tell anyone about your private life. You can trust me to keep my mouth shut. Just be careful on that front. I don’t want to see my friend get hurt.”

With that Eric pushed his way past me and Brandon. The look on Eric’s face is a look of hurt not anger. I hurt Eric by not totally trusting my childhood friend. I should have trusted him about me. Now I need to show him I do trust him with everything. I can’t be without his friendship like I have always had.

I looked at Brandon then over at Chris. Chris still looked freaked out. I really felt bad for him. I walked over to him and patted him on the back.

“Chris, I want you to meet the best little brother a guy could ever hope to have. This is Brandon. Brandon, this is Chris, my boyfriend!” I proclaimed unashamedly.

“Nice to meet you Chris, I wasn’t lying when I said my bro has good taste.” Brandon took Chris’s hand into their first hand shake.

All of us heard Coach yelling for Chris. I quickly went over and kissed him once last time on the lips. I whispered in his ear as I squeezed his hand; “I love you very much Chris. Nothing will take this feeling away. Chris can’t wait until I can see you again!”

“I love you too, Josh. I am going to miss you so much.”

Right as I stepped back with my brother Brandon, Coach walked up. We followed Coach out the front door. I waived one last time as Chris got into the car with Coach. I looked over at Brandon smiling at my younger brother.

“Have I ever told you that you are the coolest little bro any one can ask for?”

I grabbed ahold of Brandon rubbing the top of his head. Brandon just laughed mumbling thank you through the laughs.

On the way home Brandon and I spoke about what just unfolded at school. My being gay truly doesn’t bother him in the least. I knew Brandon would take it the best out of all my family. I just didn’t think he would take it this good.

He finally remembered why he came down, besides to watch me win my races. He told me all about the visit that Elizabeth made to the house. I was raging mad to say the least. At the same time I wondered what is up her sleeve. She has to have something to get me trouble with. If she didn’t, she wouldn’t have made an appearance.

The minute Brandon I walked in the door of the house. We were escorted into the study. My mom just finished the call with my father and now it is our turn to speak with him. Funny thing is I spoke with him this morning.

My father explained he didn’t know when is the next time he is going to be able to call. So he needed to talk with us about few things while he has a chance. Each of us told him how we were doing in school. Then came the moment I dreaded.

“Your mother has told me about what happened in the house. Daniel and Carlos I am not going to even ask you guys to explain what you think you were doing. You know the rules of the house. I know I have not changed them. I asked your mother during my absence if she has changed the rule. She has told me ‘no’.

Now let me make this perfectly clear with you boys: No matter if I am there or not, the rules are in effect. Daniel and Carlos you guys broke rule number one. You proved the point as to why the rule is in place by hurting your brother Brandon. Your horse playing resulted in your brother landing a ride to the hospital.

You two are punished for two weeks; straight to school, football and back home. The only time you are allowed out of the house is when you are at a football game or school event. Plus you two won’t receive allowance for a month.”

Daniel and Carlos didn’t like being punished. We all know not to speak up when we are getting punished. They agreed with our father. After that we said goodbye and left the study to start on our weekend chores.

I finished up as quickly as I could. I wanted to sneak off to call Chris. I wanted to make sure everything he saw today didn’t freak him out. As far as Eric I am going to give him space to settle down. That is the best thing I can do there.

The rest of the weekend went off with out problems. Elizabeth never came back to the house. Still that didn’t keep my mom from asking me why she came down in the first place. Because I couldn’t answer her, she thought I am hiding something from her.

Brandon still had nightmares and still came to my room. We would wake early in the morning to sneak him back into his room. We didn’t know that our mom knew what is going on with Brandon and his sleeping patterns.

Monday morning during breakfast the atmosphere was chilly as hell. Eric sat with me and the guys, but didn’t say a word to me at all. I tried several times to speak with him, but all he did was to nod his head or say ‘yes’ or ‘no’. It was worse when Chris showed up. He just clammed up.

I introduced Chris to the guys he hadn’t met before. They seem to take to Chris easily. Chris has that type of personality. I think that is why I was drawn to him from the beginning. He is just a likeable guy to be around.

Since Eric didn’t want to talk with me or Chris. I tried to get Billy involved with what we were talking about. As usual, Billy looked scared of his own shadow! We need to figure out a way to pull him out of his shell.

The bell rang signaling the end of breakfast. Eric and I have our lockers side by side and he still didn’t speak with me on the way to them. I gave up trying to get him to open up as we reached our lockers. If Eric ever chooses to forgive me, I will be right here.

(BILLY’S POINT OF VIEW)

I am so scared of Josh. He hasn’t done me wrong by any means, but his presence scares me. He isn’t this big jock or anything. He’s just the type of person that walks into a room he takes in all the air of the room. Everyone respects him. I know that is not it at all, it is just I want to be like him so much.

All through breakfast I couldn’t keep my eyes off of this girl I like. She is the most beautiful girl I have ever seen in my life. I have her in all my classes except PE. I really want to ask her out, but every time I go up to her I just freeze.

So I have decided to admire from afar. If I can’t get her, I can at least admire her from a distance. I fantasize of a day that we are together and I walk down the hall with her on my arm as boyfriend and girlfriend.

During home room we had a sub. We actually lucked out because whenever we have a sub, there is really no class. We fool around or like me get ahead with the class work. Today it wasn’t to be.

You remember the girl I told you I am hot for? Well, she actually is walking my way right now. I know she is walking to see me because there is no one else around where I am sitting. I am sweeting like crazy and my mouth is dry.

“Hello Billy right?”

“Yeah that is me!” I couldn’t even get the words out of my mouth at first.

“My name is Janet. I was just wondering if it is ok we study for next period.”

I just looked at her wondering why she chose to study rather than talk with her girlfriends. I just nodded to her as she pulled a desk next to mine. Man, she smells so damn good! I have never seen her so close before.

Whiled we studied Janet kept hitting my knee with hers. Once in awhile she would accidently brush against my arm or hand. I started to think she likes me. Then I thought why she would like a person like me. I am nowhere in her league.

We both looked at the clock and realized the bell is about to ring. As she gathered her stuff, she put a piece of notebook paper on my desk.

“Billy I would like you to call me so we can talk if you can.” She smiled at me and then walked back to her girlfriends.

I picked up the piece of notebook paper to see what is written on it. It was her phone number. She wrote for me to please call her. She wants to get to know me better. I couldn’t believe this. Janet actually made the first move on me! The bell rang and I rushed out the door before Janet could take the paper back.

(ERIC’S POINT OF VIEW)

I have known for weeks now there was something odd about the friendship between Josh and Chris. I am not mad that Josh is gay. What is bothering me the most is that he didn’t trust me.

On Sunday I talked to my neighbor. Whenever there is something bothering me, I go to him for advice. He is an older gentleman that has seen a lot in his lifetime. Everytime I speak with him, he knows just what to say to me.

He explained to me that I was taking it wrong. Josh was not trying to keep something from me, he was very afraid. People like Josh don’t know who they can talk to and who they can’t. All they know is that they might lose everyone that means a lot to him.

At first I didn’t understand what the old man meant. Josh should know me by now. I wouldn’t abandon him because of who he likes. But the more and more I thought about it. I realized exactly what the old man was trying to say to me.

Others that have walked in Josh’s shoes in the past have gotten the rotten end of the deal. They would open up to those they thought would understand. Instead they would get an ass kicking and a loose friends or family members. Josh also has to worry about being outted here at school.

I didn’t even see Elizabeth walking up to me. I was so deep in thought; she got the jump on me. I wish she didn’t.

“Eric I noticed something today during breakfast and in hallways.”

“Yeah what is that Elizabeth?”

“You and Josh are no longer getting along. Am I right on that?”

“You know what, Elizabeth, give me a break today. I am in no mood for your games. So whatever is going on in your head, just forget about it?”

“Just hear me out for a minute Eric. I know you and Josh have had a falling out. What ever it was, it is huge. I need to know what it was because I need to get back with Josh” Elizabeth explained.

“And he and I not talking or fighting somehow gets you back on his good side? Elizabeth, I sometimes wonder if you were dropped to many times when you were a baby.”

“Don’t make a joke out of this Eric. You guys don’t understand we belong together. Josh is going places and with me at his side he will get there even faster.”

“Look Elizabeth no matter what Josh and my problem might be I will never turn on my best friend. So you should try and find another sap to help you out.”

“Damn it Eric, one way or another I will find out what is going on. When I do, I will use it to my benefit. Josh will be mine again; I can promise you that.”

I couldn’t believe how crazy Elizabeth is sounding right now. She has gone so over the top she needs to get some kind of help. I did tell her that, but that seemed to make her angrier than she was before. I just walked away as she went into her fit.

I needed to figure out a way to get over my dumb ass fit. Josh is my best friend and I miss him. I need to forgive him for not telling me. I need to be there in his corner as a friend should be when they need help. Josh is going to need help that is for sure.

(JOSHUA’S POINT OF VIEW)

During the day Chris and I snuck peeks at each other. Chris really looks hot today. I love how he dresses. From the polo shirt to the blue jeans to his running shoes, he is just one hot guy.

We actually had a chance during lunch to sneak into a restroom and steal a kiss. I used the restroom and started to wash my hands when Chris came up to me. He stretched his arms around me, rubbing his nose in my hair. Just as I looked over my shoulder, he leaned in to kiss me. I just love how it feels kissing Chris.

Even during swim practice I noticed Chris sneaking peeks at me. I feel really naked in just my Speedos. I think it shows too much of my body. Don’t get me wrong; I don’t mind looking at the other guys, especially Chris in their Speedos.

But right now I couldn’t stop thinking about Eric. He still has not talked to me since Saturday. I wonder how long he plans to hold a grudge against me. All I know is that I needed to go straight home today. So that leaves out any chance of me going to Eric’s house to try and talk with him.

Chris and I took a little time in the storage closet kissing. This time we made sure to lock the door so no one else would walk in on us. I just couldn’t get enough of Chris kissing me. It actually completed me. I didn’t want to have full out sex with Chris. I just wanted to be with him and hold onto him.

Once again we heard the Coach calling for Chris. We got out of the storage room and closed the door just in time. Just like Saturday, Chris and I said our goodbyes there in the hallway. He went his way and I went mine.

Just as I walked out of the pool, Bernice joined me. All the way home I told her all about me and Chris through the day. She just kept punching me in the arm when ever I showed how happy I am being with Chris.

Then I told her what had happened on Saturday. The look on her face said it all. All she kept asking me is how I plan to handle it. I couldn’t really answer the question. All I said to her is that it is up to Eric. He is the one that needs to start talking to me. He is the one that has stopped talking to me. Bernice just nodded as I told her.

As usual, we did our homework before we spoke again. Just as we started talking Brandon walked in. He actually joined into our talk this time. He is very cool about this whole thing. Before we knew it, it is time for Bernice to go home.

Right when I shut the front door and turned around, my mother was waiting for me. I didn’t need this tonight. She asked for me to join her and Brandon in the study. I kind of breathed a little easier since it wasn’t just me.

Right when we walked in, my mom laid into us. She knows about Brandon sleeping in my room. She made it clear she didn’t like the idea of this. To me I don’t understand what the problem is. We are brothers and we are comforting the other when he needs it. Isn’t that what brothers and sisters are for?

Still my mom didn’t see it that way. All she saw is two guys, brothers at that, sleeping together. I know I can’t ever come out to her. There is no way she can handle it. I believe she is one of those parents that believe I can spread gay to my brothers like the common cold. She would kick me out. I really don’t see my father fighting for me.

Brandon and I just listened to her. She grounded us for not listening to her. We took our punishment and left. I looked at Brandon and smiled. As we walked up the stairs to get ready for dinner, I nudged him against the wall. Then I ran the rest of the way up.

After dinner I didn’t feel like listening to Daniel or Carlos. So I went to my room to sit and think. I have a bad habit of thinking too much into one subject. I tend to over think things. Read too much into what is happening around me.

One conclusion I did make before falling asleep is this. No matter how madly Chris and I might fall in love with each other we can’t come out to anyone else. We need to keep our hands off of each other at school. That includes the storage room. Coach will catch us one day just like Eric did.

Also I need to find out what Elizabeth has up her sleeve. I found out through the grapevine she actually spoke with Eric today. She wanted to know what is going on between Eric and me. I just don’t understand what the hell she wants to know that for. She just can’t get it through her thick head that we are over.

Same as the day before, Eric refused to talk with or Chris. In fact it seemed to be worse than yesterday. He didn’t even nod his head or say one worded answers when I asked him a direct question. All the guys at the table saw this going on, but didn’t say a word.

Bernice on the other hand seemed to be getting angry under the collar about the whole thing. In fact Eric got up and left the table about thirty minutes before the bell rang. Bernice followed him on the way out.

(BERNICE’S POINT OF VIEW)

I can’t believe my eyes with the way Eric is acting toward Josh and Chris. Fine, he is hurt that he wasn’t told by Josh about his true feelings. But Eric needs to understand what goes through the mind of a gay person now-a-days.

When I saw Eric get up to leave and not even say goodbye to anyone at the table that was it for me. I need to get this kid and wring him his neck. If he doesn’t want to be friends with Josh anymore, then end it. See if any of the guys at the table goes with him, but leave the table. That way no one is uneasy at the table when they talk.

I caught up to Eric in the main hallway. Elizabeth is heading straight for him. There is no way I am going to allow her to get her claws into Eric right now. Just as Elizabeth got to Eric, so did I.

“Hey bitch, why don’t you go and find another back stabbing asshole instead of Eric! He isn’t ever going to back stab his best friend.”

Elizabeth just looked at me stunned. She turned around and walked back to the cafeteria through the back doors. She must have been watching and waiting for Eric to leave the table. What a bitch she is. I can’t stand people like her.

I pulled Eric all the way outside to the corner of the building. We walked until I felt that no one could see us or hear what we are talking about, I didn’t stop. When I finally did, I pushed Eric against the wall of the building.

“Eric, I don’t know what your problem is. Whatever it is, you need to get over it. You are breaking your best friend’s heart everyday this goes on. You and he are like brothers. Is this the way you treat a family member when they don’t live up to what you thought they would be?”

Eric just looked at me and then down to his shoes.

“Eric, you know this is crap, so why don’t you just stop it? You are Josh’s best friend and he needs you more now than ever!”

Eric seems to be not at home. He just doesn’t seem to want to answer or talk about what is bothering him about Josh and Chris.

“Eric listen, you need to get control of whatever your demon is about this whole thing. Josh and everyone that walks in his shoes already have a hard time with this. You’ve got to understand one thing; he didn’t choose to be in love with the same sex. Trust me when I say this. Don’t let him down when he needs you the most!”

“Bernice, when did you know all about this?”

“When he broke up with Elizabeth and we talked. We talked a long time and he told me when I asked him to be my boyfriend. He didn’t want to live another lie with another woman. I told him something first that brought it out of him.”

“May I ask what you told him Bernice?”

“Well the way you are treating a friend you have known so well for over ten years, I don’t know if I can believe you have my back on anything! So I rather not tell you what Josh and I were talking about.

What I want to leave you with here is this: You have a table of friends in there looking at you and Josh trying to figure out what is going on between you two. You are loosing everyone there because they see Josh trying to be Josh. But you are just refusing to talk with him.

If you don’t figure what you want dealing with this you will lose a great friend in Josh, and the trust in everyone at that table. One day Josh is going to come out of his shell with everyone. When they find out that is why you got mad with Josh don’t be surprised they turn away from you due to the way you dealt with it.”

I just walked away from Eric. It seemed that nothing I said is going to get him to change his mind right then and there. I just can’t understand how a friend of that many years could treat his friend this way. I have heard people react this way, but never believed it. Now I have seen it with my own two eyes.

(PATRICK’S POINT OF VIEW)

I invited Frank over to my house this afternoon. My parents were not going to be home again. I just want to spend time with Frank. I hurried home to get the house cleaned up before he arrives. I kind of had the house a mess.

Just as I put the broom and mop up I heard the door open. Frank yelled for me. I told him to come in anytime when ever my parents aren’t home. I walked out of the kitchen to meet Frank in the living room.

We hugged at first and then kissed. After being tongue tied for about five minutes, we made our way to the couch. We cuddled in front of the television watching a movie on pay-per-view. Every so often I went up and gave Frank a kiss.

About the middle of the movie the pizza arrived. I went to pay for the pizza while Frank went to the kitchen to get us sodas and plates. We actually had the entire large pizza down before the movie ended.

Frank is as surprised as I am seeing the empty box of pizza on the coffee table.

“Frank we ate so much, I think we need to go to my private gym in the house.”

“I didn’t know you had a gym in here!”

“Just follow me and you will see that it has everything needed to work off the extra pounds we just put on.”

I got up grabbing Franks hand at the same time. I lead him down the hall to my bedroom. When we walked in, he finally realized what I meant. I turned to Frank and he had this big old grin on his face.

Before he could say anything, I had his belt off and was already working off his shirt! Just as we got to the bed, I already had his pants down to his knees. I pushed Frank to the bed, smothering him with kisses.

I kissed from his neck to his belly button. Not missing one inch of his chest or stomach. I slowly worked around the waist band of Frank’s underwear before I completely had the underwear to his ankles as well.

I just took his dick into my mouth and went to town. I couldn’t get enough of Frank’s dick! If I could, I would like to have it at my beck and call all day long. As I bobbed up and down on his dick, I looked up at him. He has his eyes closed as always, but he is moaning like crazy.

I decided to do something new that we have never done before. I got up from the bed and went to my dresser. I opened the middle drawer to pull out this toy I bought the other day at a XXX video store. When I turned around, Frank still has his eyes closed.

I lubricated my new toy before I went back down on Frank. This time I put Frank’s legs up into the air. I wanted to taste his sweet butt. Frank has no idea what I have planned for him. Once I felt his hole is lubricated enough, I grabbed my toy, using the lubricated side. I slowly and gently pushed it into Frank’s butt, and all he did is moan.

I went back to work on Frank’s dick. Once I had Frank in the moment, I flipped the switch on.

“What the fuck is that? Oh man does it feel awesome. What is that you have in my ass?” Frank asked with amazement and surprise.

I didn’t say a word; I just kept working on his dick. I knew it isn’t going to take long now. With the vibrating dick I stuck into Franks butt and me bobbing away on his dick Frank will cum any moment now.

“Please Patrick pull that thing out. I am going to cum any minute with it in me. Please pull it out. I am going to…..”

That was it. Frank shot into my mouth. He is going so crazy, tossing and turning all over my bed. I was afraid he is going to hurt himself with the vibrating dick in his butt. At the same time I didn’t want to loose one drop of his sweet cum.

Just as he shot the last of his cum in my mouth, Frank reached down between his legs and pulled out the dick. I looked up at him and smiled. He actually smiled back down at me.

“I thought that we could spice our love making up a little” I said in a smart ass tone.

“I didn’t mind at all. Let’s see how you do when I stick that thing up your butt” Frank replied without a hesitation.

Frank tossed me on my back and he tore off my clothes within seconds. Just as I did to him, he worked his way day to the waist band of my underwear. He pulled my underwear all the way off before he started working on my dick.

As always, Frank loves to play around the tip of my dick. He knows it drives me up the wall when he does it. At the same time, I know if Frank doesn’t stop playing with my head, I am going to shoot.

Frank worked my balls before working my butt. When he felt he had me moist enough, he stuck the dick in my ass. Using the lubricant I already put on it. Just as I had for him, Frank gently and slowly pushed the dick up into my butt. Even before he started bobbing up and down on me again, he flipped the dick on.

I can’t even begin to explain the feelings it gave me when he turned on the dick. It felt like electricity started running through my veins. My dick got even harder if that is possible.

“Frank I don’t know how much longer I will be able to hold on!”

Frank just kept taking me closer to my climax. Before I could say another word to Frank, my toes curled up, my butt cheeks tightened around the fake cock in my ass, and my balls rose. Then I exploded like a volcano!

Frank didn’t even release my dick from his mouth. He held onto my dick, swallowing every ounce of cum. I grabbed ahold of the covers on my bed trying to keep down my moans where the neighbors wouldn’t hear me!

Frank kept sucking on my dick even after I finished shooting my last shot. I don’t know what he thinks, but there is no more milk left. I reached down, grabbed Franks head to bring up to me where we can kiss.

We sat there catching our breath looking at the toy I bought.

“Patrick, please keep on surprising me with new things in our sex life. Just promise me we will never go in leather and chains! That I can’t stand!”

“I promise to never to tie you up and whip you in leather. That I can’t stand either. I love you too much to do something like that.”

I leaned into Frank to kiss him. I never want to let Frank go. I lost track of time on how long we laid there kissing. All I know is that I love the way Frank’s cum coated tongue feels and tastes in my mouth when we kiss.

(DANIEL LOPEZ’S POINT OF VIEW)

We are just rolling over the Iraqi Army. Before we know it, we will be home before years end. I really hope we do get home quickly. I miss my kids and wife.

Just as I looked up in the air, several apache helicopters flew overhead. I grabbed the radio to find out who ordered them in.

“This is lead one! Who ordered the helicopters?”

“Lead one those helicopters that flew by are not ours. I repeat they are not ours. They are part of Great Britain Army forces.”

I couldn’t believe these guys are using this battlefield to showcase their armed forces. This is not the time to get cocky. But knowing the British Army, they want to beat us to the finish line. That is going to soldiers killed.

All of a sudden there is a flash in the air, and then it hit. The air to air missile that got fired from the ground actually hit one of the helicopters. You can see it hit the tail and they are going down.

You could hear over the radio the may-day calls broadcasting. Then the word you didn’t want to hear. The helicopter that got hit is carrying a member of the royal family. Son-of-a-bitch! Why in the world would they be flying over an area we have not secured yet?

I got the call to see where the wreckage is and to do whatever it takes to get the member of the royal family out of there. I ordered our forces to halt. It would not be wise to take this entire amount of men into this battle. Having too many men could result in more deaths then we already have.

Within minutes I put together a unit of men and got on our way. The other helicopter is still circling above the crash site. Already there is a gun battle going on between the helicopter and the Iraqi soldiers below.

We stopped about a mile away in order to foot it the rest of the way. By driving down to the battle paints a bulls eye on us. Just as we reached the ridge, I saw the helo had crashed into the base of a huge hole that we call a depression.

The Iraqi soldiers are too busy firing at the helicopter that they don’t even know we are there. I radioed into the ground forces to continue around the base of the depression. That way the Iraqi soldiers are going to be fighting two fronts and not even notice us going down to the helicopter.

As I waited for the ground attack to begin, I looked down to see where the soldiers of the crashed helicopter are at. It looks like the Iraqi soldiers actually have them still pinned in the helicopter.

Right when the first shot from the ground troops was heard. We started our way down to the helicopter. We actually had to fight all the way down the side of the depression. They must know what they have here, otherwise they wouldn’t be fighting us so hard for it.

We took cover in the helicopter once we got to it. I looked around to see what we had. The pilots are both dead, but the member of the royal family was fine. In fact he is firing at the Iraqi soldiers.

I went up to him to introduce myself to him. I found it is a Prince that is actually down here. I knew right then and there we needed to get him out of here. We can’t allow the Iraqi soldiers get him alive or we can’t afford for him to die either.

The Iraqi soldiers actually are well fortified. They were laying in wait for us. They could actually out wait us down here. The only way we are going to get this Prince out of here is by fighting our way out!

I ordered the men to lay down cover fire as three of us ripped the doors off of the helo. I want to use the metal of the doors as a shield. At the same time I knew we couldn’t carry the doors. So I needed to get rid of the Iraqi soldiers that are shooting down at us.

I radioed in where I wanted the bombs to hit. I ordered the men to be ready to make their way back up the field. At the same time there will be a helicopter waiting for the prince over the hill when we get him there.

Right as the bombs hit, we started our way up. The Iraqi soldiers are not going down without a fight. We boxed in the prince where he wouldn’t get hit. I followed up the unit as we made our way up the hill.

Bombs were hitting as we fired at the Iraqi soldiers that are firing at us. Through all the dust and sand, the Iraqi soldiers that are still alive can’t see their hands in front of their faces let alone us running up the hill.

Once we reached the top of the hill. I felt this burning feeling in my right leg. I didn’t pay any attention to it until it got even sharper then before. Still I put it out of my mind. I needed to deliver the Prince to the helicopter alive. All of a sudden the burning feeling jumped up to my right arm. I looked down to see blood coming out of my arm.

We reached the helicopter with the Prince and his soldiers alive. As they loaded into the helicopter the Price leaned over to me.

“General I know you are doing your job. Still I will never forget you or what you did for me and my men. You have just made a life long friend with me.”

I patted the Prince on his shoulder as the helicopter took off. They needed to get him out of the battle field in one piece. I looked around at my men to see if I had them all counted for. Once I did head count and we loaded up to head over to the battle.

Just as we reached my men, the battle ended. Every Iraqi soldier that stood there to fight died. I couldn’t believe that there were only twenty five Iraqi soldiers pinning us down. So far in this war, they are the only soldiers that put up a fight.

As I get my briefing of the battle, I look at what is causing the burning pain in my leg and arm. When I looked at my leg, I couldn’t believe that I actually got shot. The hard part of it all is it was twice almost in the same area. I also got hit in my upper arm.

I called the medic over to take a look at the wounds. He wanted me to be sent to the back lines to get the bullets taken out. I refused to leave my men. I ordered the medic to take the bullets out right here and now.

He warned me it is going to be painful, and it was. As soon as he had the three bullets out, he made sure they didn’t hit any main artery, vein, or bone. Once he felt comfortable they didn’t, he wrapped me up.

As he left, he warned me of the discomfort I will be feeling for several days. I know the medic is covering his own butt. I know being shot is no picnic afterwards. Still, there was simply no way I am going to be pulled off the battlefield and away from my men.

(JOSHUA’S POINT OF VIEW)

As the week wore on, Eric didn’t change his tune. I finally gave in by Thursday. When He is ready to let go of the anger of my not trusting him, I will be here. At the same time I hope he doesn’t take too long getting back to normal.

At the same time Chris felt bad for hurting the friendship Chris and I have. I made it clear it was not his fault. Eventually I was going to move on my feelings. So if it was not Chris, it would be some other guy. Eric would be mad at me no matter what.

Also I couldn’t spend that much time with Chris. I wanted to so bad, but I am punished. Trust me; my mom knows when practice lets out. She knows how long it takes me to walk from school home. So she wants me in the house at the same time everyday. No excuses can be given.

Not only can’t I spend time with Chris. I can’t spend time with Bernice either. We can’t even study together like we always do after school. I know Bernice doesn’t like the idea either.

My mom forgot I have Glee Club practice in the morning before school. She actually thought I wanted to leave early in order to sneak off with friends. What a dumb idea that is. Most of us don’t even like getting up early in the morning by choice. She actually tried to keep me from going to Glee practice.

I actually dreaded when Friday arrived. At least during the week I am more at school than at home. During the weekend I only get away from the house Saturday morning for the swim events. This Saturday there isn’t even that!

It looks like Eric finally decided what he is going to do. He wasn’t at the table with us for breakfast. I felt a gaping hole in my chest to see the seat where Eric normally sits empty. I know he came to school today, because I saw him at the lockers when I walked in here.

(ERIC’S POINT OF VIEW)

I am tired of the looks I keep getting from the guys. Josh finally all together gave up trying to talk with me. I know the guys are taking Josh’s side. I look like the bad guy in this whole fight we are having.

I decided not to even go to breakfast this morning. Let them see how it is without me at the table to look down on. Also I decided last night to speak with Elizabeth once and for all. She has been bothering me all week long.

I still had her number. So I called her last night to meet me face to face at the side of the building where Bernice and I had our little chat the other day. Once I knew all the guys are eating breakfast. I made my way to our meeting point.

As I walked around the building, Elizabeth is already waiting for me. Talk about wanting to know what is going on in the life of her ex! I walked up to her looking around to make sure there isn’t anyone around to see us meet.

“It is about time Eric. You made the right decision. Trust me I am not trying to hurt Josh in anyway. I just need something to bring him back to me.”

“Why do you want a guy that doesn’t love you at all or even WANT you Elizabeth?”

“That really doesn’t matter here. Once I get him back, he will learn to love me again.”

I just stood there looking at Elizabeth. She has this look on her face as if she won the lottery or something. The information I know will win her the lottery. The only question I have is she really only going to use it to get Josh back. Or is she going to take the information to hurt him.

“Elizabeth what I am about to tell you, you won’t like!”

“Trust me Eric; what ever it is I can handle it!”

I just looked at her and decided to let it rip. “Elizabeth you can be a……”

TO BE CONTINUED……………..

NOTE TO READERS:

{Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a damn minute here guys. Is Eric actually going to tell Elizabeth about Josh and Chris? That is a low blow if there ever was one! Fine, Eric can’t handle the idea that Josh didn’t confide in him about him being gay. But who would trust people out there? Looking at what others have gone through, why would you want to go through that by choice? Eric is proving to Josh right in why he didn’t trust him in the first place. Right now the only really stable relationship is Patrick and Frank You can tell these two are really in love with each other? They have successfully kept the outside world from interfering with their love life. Look around you guys, and see the dislike Josh’s mom seems to have towards Josh. I really don’t believe she has anything against Brandon. It is just Brandon is at the wrong place at the wrong time. I can’t wait until Josh’s dad comes home and straightens out this lopsided house. Talking about Josh’s dad, he just made a life time friend to a Prince of England. Talk about having the right kind of friends in your corner! It won’t hurt having a Prince in Daniel Senior’s corner. It looks like right now evil is winning in Josh’s life. I hope that changes in the next chapters to come. There is a so much to answer in the chapters to come. Keep reading the future chapters, and enjoy! Please email me and let me know how I am doing at jacobmillertex@aol.com, Thanks!}
EDITOR’S CORNER:

Wow! What a busy Chapter!....with the usual cliffhanger.

Before I get into my comments, I want to say thanks to the readers that have e-mailed me with their questions and some input. Uncle Roger and I had a great and candid exchange.

He found out if he asks me a question, he’s going to get an honest and open answer! Now onto the comments for this Chapter.

If Eric betrays Josh, the repercussions will be totally enormous and life altering! He did promise he’d keep the confidence. I wonder what is REALLY eating Eric underneath the trust and honesty question. There has to be more to it….I wonder…..

Well, Josh and Chris certainly aren’t “entertaining” us much as they just can’t seem to get things moving between themselves. Thank goodness for Patrick and Frank for a little spice! I hope they each have a generous allowance. Those C-cells can get expensive!

Brandon is truly the best brother a guy could ask for. He has a strength of character well beyond his age. Something tells me that Brandon will be at Josh’s side all through life.
Well, Josh’s mom sure kept to her word to his dad about not talking to Elizabeth, but I think she nearly sprained every fiber in her body doing it! Oh, I suspect the pry bar will come into play with her yet. She sure has a narrow mind about Josh allowing Brandon to sleep with him when he’s having problems sleeping. That is truly pathetic in my estimation.

Right now, Josh has lost Eric’s support, but he still has Brandon, Bernice closely at his side. He has LOTS more support than most guys his age, even today, that are dealing with the new realization of their sexuality.

Yes, age does factor into how a guy deals with his coming to grips with being gay, but, no matter the age, it seems that many still have struggles. Keep your eyes open. They are out there everywhere. The signs show if you look for them. If you are out and OK, be a friend to someone who is just starting the perilous part of their journey. You can make a huge difference.

If you want to feel love, try giving some love away and you’ll feel it!

Until next time,

“Daddy” Rick