Before And After the Divorce - 23. Moving On and Peaceful Living - For a Bit

Before And After the Divorce

Chapter Notes

Colton and I still hung out with the guys at Casey's on Thursdays, but I decided to forego my bowling nights to go other places together. After a few dates, he brought up the subject I had avoided.

"So, Dylan, when we first met, you said you had problems with previous boyfriends. I cannot see it. You are such a nice guy."

"Well, they were the problem. I might be a nice guy, but they weren’t even close. I joked about you being a serial killer; that wasn't too far from the truth about them."

Colton’s eyes went wide. "Oh my God. More than one?"

"Yes, they were partners in crime, literally. I dated the first guy, Zach, a few times, but mostly we hung out as friends. This was while Lacy was still alive. We went our separate ways, perhaps not very amicably. After Lacy died, one of Dominic’s teachers suggested a tutoring program for gifted kids. Jackson was the tutor, and he took advantage of the program to try and groom Dominic. He tried to use the school play as a means to record Dominic changing his clothes, but luckily, my son saw the video camera. My dad caught him when he picked up Dominic. The school immediately called the police. Apparently, Zach and Jackson cooked up a scheme to film boys naked, including Dominic, and separately, get me back for some wrong Zach thought I did him. I understand they were selling the videos they did get."

"Oh. I saw the story on the news. These were the men that killed themselves in prison?"

"Yes, although I have my doubts about their suicides. Pedophiles don't get a lot of breaks in prison."

"No, they do not. Nor should they. Prisoners have a way of doling out justice as they see fit. People like those men are the worst of the worst and are often treated accordingly. But that was not very long ago. You seem to have recovered from them pretty well."

I gave Colton a soft smile. "Mostly. I still see a psychiatrist. I had a lot of confusing feelings about them. Fortunately, I didn't catch any diseases from Jackson. I’ll still get tested regularly, just to be safe."

"I am assuming you mean to say you had unprotected sex with him?"

"Yes.” Dylan shifted his gaze away from Colton. “But not by choice. He barebacked me without my knowledge. He was the first, and only time that I've bottomed."

"Ah, I see.” Colton reached over and squeezed my hand. “So, you probably could not tell he wasn’t wearing a condom."

"Exactly."

"Men like that deserve whatever karma has to dish out."

I shrugged. "Yeah, that was one of the things that confused me. I wanted something bad to happen to them even though I knew it’s not a very nice thing to wish for."

"I think that is a perfectly normal reaction."

"It probably would have been if I didn't like them so much at one time."

Colton nodded. “I can understand that. Well, while we are not anywhere near that point yet, I will have you know I basically have an unlimited supply of condoms."

"Because you work in the pharmacy."

"Correct. And while Anakin and I were faithful to each other, we both preferred to, well, avoid the mess."

I had to laugh, "Yes, that’s a reason I can agree with."

The conversation turned tame after that. It felt good to get that off my chest to someone other than Dad and my doctor. So far, we had shared a few quick kisses. That night, the kisses lasted longer and made us feel more connected. We decided it was time to introduce Dominic and Joe, so I invited Colton and Joe to join us for dinner on Saturday night at our apartment. My cooking skills have improved, so I thought I was comfortable taking that step. Turns out, I was wrong. I wimped out, and decided against risking food poisoning, and ordered out from a local restaurant.

I figured Joe was like any other nine-year-old, and he would like spaghetti and meatballs. I got the meatballs on the side because I failed to ask if either were vegetarian. Another reason for ordering food. My culinary skills were limited to chicken and pork, both massively assisted by Shake-n-Bake. I went with baked ziti for Colton and me. I worried needlessly. The meatballs were a hit. Dominic mentioned that he and Joe sort of knew each other. Joe had also volunteered to be a flying monkey in the school play.

Colton was a bit embarrassed that he didn’t realize that Jackson was the same teacher that had overseen the play. Joe tried volunteered for the part after everything happened. I assured him it was an easy connection to miss if he didn’t know all the details.

After dinner, Dominic showed Joe his room and his fairly large collection of books. Dominic loved reading and could digest a good-sized children's book in one evening. He also enjoyed reading them over and over. We’ve never donated any of his books, although he has occasionally given some to friends. If I'm not mistaken, all but one of those 'gifts' were replaced. Jackson was right about one thing—Dominic was intelligent. He's reading at a fifth-grade level already. When it was time for Colton and Joe to leave, Dominic asked for a bag so he could give Joe a few books. He wouldn't have done that if he didn't like him.

The following weekend, I turned twenty-eight on Friday, so Colton returned the dinner favor on Saturday. Rather than ordering out, his mother cooked us a traditional Korean meal, giving us different options. We started with Kimchi Jjigae, a spicy stew. For the main courses, she prepared Bulgogi, a beef barbeque dish, Mandoo, which is a dumpling-type dish, and Chap Chae, stir-fried glass noodles. I was a little worried about how Dominic would like the food, but he packed it away like a teenager. Mrs. Kang was very happy he ate so much. I had no complaints about the food either.

Dominic liked using Joe’s Korean name better than his Americanized nickname. After dinner, the boys went to Jiho’s room. Mrs. Kang refused my help cleaning up. Fortunately, Colton gave me a heads-up that an offer was sufficient, but don't offer again if she refused the help. After his parents went next door, we settled on the couch to watch a hockey game. Colton called Jiho in Korean. Based on the bit of amorous activity that followed, I deduced that it was instructions not to come down without announcing themselves first. Colton confirmed this in between heated kisses. Colton didn't hide his preference for men, but neither one of us wanted the boys to see more than they should at their age. It was a good thing, too, because Colton had his hand inside my shirt when we heard, "We're coming down " ten or fifteen seconds before they arrived. Damn, just when it was getting good.

Dominic was bouncing with excitement when they tumbled into the living room, laughing. "Jiho taught me a few Korean words. Want to hear them?"

I smiled. It wasn’t like we had a choice. Dominic’s enthusiasm was cute.

"Jib means house. Hyeongje means brother. We're going to call each other hyeongje since neither of us has one. Besides, I like that better than chingu, which means friend. And also, abeoji means father."

I was proud of him for trying to learn some of his new friend's language, "You did very well."

Colton agreed, "He did indeed. He did very well with the pronunciation, too."

They both said "gamsahabnida" and thundered upstairs like a herd of elephants Colton told me that meant 'Thank you.' We resumed kissing for a little longer until it was time to go home. In my truck on the way back to the apartment, I asked Dominic if he had fun.

"Yeah. Jiho is funny, too. He read me a book in Korean, and translated it to English, making funny voices for the different characters."

"That's good. So, you like him?"

"Yeah. Do you like his abeoji?"

I couldn’t help grinning. "I did. I think we're becoming good chingu."

"I hope we can go back there soon."

"I'm sure we will."

I was right. At Casey's on Thursday, Colton invited us back on Saturday again. He mentioned asking his mother if she would watch the boys so we could have some alone time. Jiho had plenty of toys and books next door to occupy them for a few hours.

After the boys went next door, Colton approached me with hesitation. "I have not been touched by a man since Anakin died. I think it’s time that changed. Are you okay with going further than kissing?”

I didn't have to think about it for too long. Is one millisecond too long? "I’d be honored.”

Colton’s expression lit up at my response. "And I can touch you?"

"Yes."

His kisses were addictive. My body instinctively leaned into his. I followed his lead, knowing that his previous relationship was a better example of what happened between two men. Mine had been a bust. I didn't want to go too far, too fast. He took the lead and unbuttoned my pants. I fumbled with the zipper on his jeans but got them open. My hips bucked when he gripped me firmly. We took our time exploring each other. I whimpered when he broke the kiss.

"We must stop now."

My brain froze. You’re fucking kidding me. Now? It kickstarted again when he explained.

"I get us some tissues. I am not going to last much longer. This is okay?"

Despite the throbbing in my balls, I nodded. "Yes, that is very okay. I have the same problem."

He came back carrying a box of tissues and his pants. I followed suit and tossed my jeans on the floor. We picked it right back up where we left off. It didn’t take much to set him off. It couldn’t have been more than a minute or two before I felt his semen hitting my hand and wrist. I came just a few seconds later.

We sat on the couch, panting, until we caught our breath.

Colton kissed me. "That was very good, Dylan. I thank you."

I loved his Korean accent and the formality his words carried. "I should be the one thanking you for suggesting it. It was very good for me, too."

"I am happy. I like you a lot and hope we can do this more in the future."

"I like you a lot too. I can guarantee we’ll be doing this again.”

He smiled and gave me another kiss, which I returned with a bit of heat I was starting to get aroused again when he stopped.

Colton pressed his forehead against mine. "We should dress. It is getting close to Joe's bedtime."

I pouted but knew he was right. "Okay. You’re right. I should get Dylan home soon, too."

We cleaned ourselves up and put our pants back on.

Colton put his hand on my arm. "I must ask you one question before you go."

"Okay."

"Jiho and I go to the Korean baths most Sundays. I know many American men are uncomfortable being nude around others, but we feel it is most natural. The pool there is nude only. Is that something you and Dominic might want to do with us?"

"I'll have to talk to him about it. He’s been showering on his own for a year or so. I’m not sure if he’d be comfortable around anyone else, especially with what just happened.”

Colton nodded. "I understand. This might help him overcome the bad connection to what Jackson was trying to do. I think you would like it. It is very relaxing and therapeutic. Once one gets past the nudity, it is very refreshing."

I hummed. "I've heard they're nice. I’ll explain how they’re a lot different in your culture, but I won't make him go if he doesn't want to."

Frowning, Colton agreed. "No, I would never want you to force him or yourself to do anything you weren’t comfortable with. If he doesn’t want to go, I hope you’ll consider it.”

I promised Colton I would let him know after I spoke to Dominic. The idea of a public bathhouse was strange to me, but as an adult, I knew there were vast differences between the type of facility Colton and Joe went to and the seedy places men frequented looking for sex.

It was a short drive home, and Dominic rambled on about Jiho’s grandmother’s cooking. I decided to wait until we were at the apartment to ask him about the bathhouse. Before I could mention it, he had a question for me.

"Dad?"

Dad? This must be serious. "Yes?"

"Um, Jiho told me something, and I kind of want to know if it's true."

I shifted in my seat to look at him. "Okay, what was it?"

Dominic unbuckled his seatbelt and leaned forward. "He said he and his dad go to the Korean baths most Sundays. But he said in the pool, nudity is required. Is there really a place like that?"

How about that? My son beat me to the punch. "That's funny. Colton and I were talking about the same thing. Yes, there really is a place like that."

"Nearby?"

"Next town over, I believe it's called "Jjimjilbang Spa."

"That’s what Jiho said. He said Jjimjilbang means sauna."

"That makes sense."

"Um. He asked if we could go. Do you think we can try that? He said it's a great place."

"Are you sure? We'll need to be nude."

Dominic fidgeted with the hem of his shirt. "I know. Will you be mad if I chicken out after we get there?"

I shook my head. "No. I’d never be mad at you for something like that. I might be a little disappointed if you don't want to try new things. I’m proud of you for being willing to try it.”

"I know. It's like we're not supposed to get undressed in front of other people, but if they're doing it too, I don't know, it makes it seem alright."

I patted the passenger seat. "Jump up here so I don’t get a stiff neck trying to look at you."

He scrambled between the front seats. Okay, he practically jumped through. I did say jump.

"In many other cultures, public nudity is more accepted. In America, a lot of people are taught from very young not to show their bodies. People here commonly equate nudity with sex. Other cultures just see it as a natural state to be in. There's no specific link to sex."

His big owl eyes blinked. "What do you think?"

"Well, obviously, I grew up here, so I was taught that it’s more acceptable to be properly covered. However, now that I’m a grown-up, I know that other cultures feel differently, and that’s okay. In fact, there are many cultures where it’s normal for people of the same gender to bathe together. If that many people think it's okay to be nude around other people without involving sex, well, maybe they're right. I do agree that nudity shouldn't equal sex."

Dominic was quiet. I could almost see the wheels turning in his head. "I think you're right. Can you text Mr. Kang and tell him we'll go tomorrow?"

"If you're sure."

His face scrunched up. "I'm sure I want to try, but I’m not sure I won't chicken out."

I chuckled. "Well, maybe they have a way to bypass the pool and use the rest of the spa, where you don't have to be nude."

"That would be good."

Now I simply must hope I don't chicken out. I don't mind Colton seeing me nude. He already has, but other people and our sons? I have a feeling I'm not going to sleep much tonight. After we got inside, I texted Colton.

Dominic brought up the spa. Apparently, he and Jiho were talking about it. He's willing to give it a try. Therefore, I am too.

Immediately, I saw three dots dancing at the bottom of the screen. Wonderful. Like I said, I think you will like it. Can you come here first so I can fill you both in on some guidelines?

We can do that. I'm sure we'll have questions. We'll follow you over, just in case Dominic is too uncomfortable with it, we wouldn't want to make you leave.

Sounds good. Around 1?

I sent a thumbs-up emoji.

Dominic was sitting cross-legged on the couch with one of his books. I let him know Colton’s response. "I told him we are willing to try. We'll meet at their house at one."

"Okay. I'm going to think about it a lot before I fall asleep, so I don't chicken out."

You and me both, kid.

"That's a good idea. Just don't stay up thinking too long. You can always think more in the morning."

"Okay. Goodnight, Daddy." Dominic closed his book and came over to give me a hug and kiss.

All must be right in his world again if I'm back to Daddy. I smiled and returned his hug, then leaned down to kiss the top of his head, "Goodnight, Dom."

Sunday

Why is it so bright in the middle of the night? I rubbed my eyes and looked at my clock. Nine o'clock? Wow. After thinking about the spa for what seemed forever, I must have crashed hard. I yawned and stretched. First things first—bathroom and coffee. Looking out the kitchen window, I saw why it seemed brighter. There was a thin layer of snow covering everything. Dominic wasn't up yet when I walked into the kitchen. I assumed he was up late thinking as well. He stumbled in around nine-thirty.

Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, he said, "Good morning, Daddy."

"Good morning, Dominic. Did you sleep well?"

"When I finally fell asleep, I think so. Do we still have Cocoa Krispies?"

I looked in the cabinet where we kept the cereal, and spied the box with the Keebler Elves pouring milk over the chocolaty concoction.

"We do. Would you like me to pour you a bowl?"

"Yes, please."

He was more awake after a few spoons full of chocolate-flavored sugar.

I sipped my coffee and tried to be nonchalant. "So, how are you feeling about going to the spa?"

"Better, I think. If being nude around other people doesn't bother Jiho, it's got to be okay. I'm still not sure I won't chicken out, though."

"One step at a time, we'll get dressed, watch some TV, then get ready to go."

Chocolate milk dripped from his spoon. "Okay. Um. Can we change together? Maybe it will help me get ready for the pool."

I got up and ruffled his messy bedhead. "Yes, sure. What's the big deal about it now?"

"Good."

After he finished his cereal, he brought his bowl to the sink. "Should I just come to your room with my clothes?"

There was definitely more space in my bedroom. "Yes, that's fine."

"Don't start without me?"

"I won't."

Dominic returned with clean underwear, jeans, and a Looney Tunes sweatshirt. He stood there as if he had forgotten how to dress himself. I didn’t say a word as I stripped off my sleep pants and donned fresh boxer briefs. My toe caught on the hem of my jeans, and Dominic laughed as I hopped around, trying to maintain my balance. It broke the awkwardness, and we finished changing without any more weirdness.

Opening his arms to hug me, "That wasn't so bad. I saw your privates, but I didn't look too long."

"Same here. It's okay. If we like the spa, we’ll have to undress together more often."

Releasing the hug and tapping his hands on his hips, Dominic sighed. "Yeah, I guess."

"I know you’re a little scared after what happened at school but trust me—that’s not normal. What Jackson did was wrong, and you have nothing to be ashamed about. You did everything right. This afternoon will be completely different. I promise."

I knew I made the right call bringing up that incident when Dominic took a big breath and squared his shoulders. "You’re right, Daddy. I think I’ll be okay. Mr. Trevon was a bad man, but that doesn’t mean everyone is.”

"Good for you. I’m proud of you."

Shortly before one o'clock, we left to go to the Kang's. When we got there, Colton briefed us on the rules. Respect was highly regarded in Korean culture, and it was considered disrespectful to stare. Dominic nodded solemnly as Colton said that talking was permitted, but it should be quiet conversations. Shouting or yelling was not acceptable. They would be required to shower prior to entering the communal pool. It seemed counterproductive but made sense after Colton explained it was for hygienic purposes. The last instructions he gave us were to relax and enjoy ourselves.

I was pleased to see how clean the place was when we entered the lobby. Friendly staff greeted us, and upon hearing it was Dom’s and my first visit, assured us they were available if we had any questions. We paid our fees, received our locker keys and a wrist band that we could use to pay for extras like food, then headed to the men's locker room. This ought to be interesting.

Next up - "Inside the Korean Baths, and Ch-ch-ch-changes""