Red Gold - 12. Chapter 12 - Jealousy and Spite

When Leelany slipped into the clearing so silently and so quickly that to Gabrielle and Ben it seemed as though one moment she was not there and the next she was there, she seemed unaccountably disappointed to see Cai standing ready for her.

“You heard me.”

“I have been hearing you since I was twelve. Why should today be any different?”

“I have found the way, follow.”

Leelany disappeared into the trees again and, taking Gabrielle by the hand Cai followed. If it had not been for Cai they would never have been able to follow her. She made no effort to help them keep up. Cai had no difficulty in following the trail even though, within the hour, he was clearly in pain and forced to stop every now and again to catch his breath, his hand pressed to his side.

On these occasions Gabrielle worried for him but very quickly learned not to question as, in this environment any show of concern or suggestion of weakness only provoked anger and he seemed to grow more and more irritable, most particularly with his sister.

They had been travelling for at least four hours before Leelany showed herself again. They broke out of the trees onto the bank of a wide, fast flowing river. The sun was beginning to fail and the waters were dark and forbidding in the dusk. Leelany was standing on the shore looking thoughtfully across the waters. She did not turn when she heard them, but there was a smile playing on her lips as though she was pleased they had fallen so far behind.

“There is a place downriver where it is safe to cross, but there is a place upriver where we can camp more comfortably. It is a decision to be made quickly as if we are to ford tonight we have to be quick to get to the place before the light fades. We are a little more than a day from the village. If we press on tonight we will reach it before nightfall tomorrow.”

“Then we press on. Lead.”

“Cai, are you sure?” Gabrielle put her hand on his arm, speaking softly.

“You should be careful not to push yourself too hard. Your body has been through a lot in the last twenty four hours.” Ben was frowning, taking in the flushed face and bright eyes and feeling helpless so far from his familiar surroundings and the tools of his trade.

Cai grinned at him. “You would be surprised what my body can take.” And then, because Leelany had already disappeared he straightened, wincing with gritted teeth and ran lightly across the scrub to the water’s edge, turning expectantly, his hair a flaming beacon in the dying light. “Come, we must hurry, it is dangerous to ford rivers in darkness.”

They hurried along the bank of the river for about ten minutes until they came to a place where it tumbled over some rocks and narrowed significantly to pass through a gulley even further downstream. In the place between the waterfall and the gulley there was a wide, shallow pool and, near the gulley itself there was a series of large, flat stones, almost like stepping stones.

Leelany was already on the other side and she paused long enough to wave mockingly before she disappeared again.

“Go, I will wait here until you are almost across, just in case anything seeks to attack from the woods while we are vulnerable.”

Neither Gabrielle nor Ben needed too much prompting, realising that, even in his weakened condition Cai was far more able to deal with whatever might come at them that they were. Ben leaped onto the first stone and then turned holding out his hand to help Gabrielle do the same. He then repeated it with the second, landed clumsily and almost fell. Windmilling his arms he recovered himself and when he was steady again reached out to Gabrielle who managed little better.

Painfully slowly they made their way from stone to stone all the way across the river. True to his word Cai remained on guard, his back to the river, eyes intent on the rapidly darkening woods the whole time. When Ben and Gabrielle were safe on the other side he finally turned his back on the woods and leaped lightly from stone to stone with no difficulty and in a fraction of the time it had taken the others.

It was Leelany’s return which distracted him. She appeared at Ben’s side and called mockingly over the water.

“Are you not across yet brother? I have found a perfect camping place. Hurry or the light will be gone before we can set the fire.”

Cai looked up, annoyed and there was a moment hesitation which caused his landing to be less than perfect and, when his foot slipped on wet moss the stab of pain from his side took him further off balance so he was not able to right himself and fell headlong into the water.

Gabrielle gasped aloud and peered intently into the dark waters in horror but Leelany only laughed. Cai surfaced in seconds and struck out easily and powerfully for the shore. Within minutes he was pulling himself out of the water.

Not waiting, Leelany laughed again. “Losing your touch Cai? Come on, hurry, I need you to help me make camp.”

“Lee, wait.” It was Gabrielle who called to her and so she ignored her and vanished.

“Are you alright?”

Ben held out his hand to Cai who was on his knees in the sand, breathing hard, his head low and his hair brushing the ground.

Cai looked up at the proffered hand and blinked water from his eyes. Taking the hand he pulled himself painfully to his feet. Ben reached out and touched his face.

“You have a fever.”

“I know.”

“You should rest.”

“I will when we get to the camp.”

“You should have told your sister.”

“She was right. It is not safe to be exposed at night. We need to reach the village as soon as we can.”

“It’s more important that you take care of yourself. If you collapse who will protect us? How will we get you back to the village?”

Cai smiled. “Healers worry too much. Warriors have to learn to just get on with it. I have been hurt before. I have had fever before. Lee will brew herbs for me and it will take the heat and pain away. Tonight I will sleep and tomorrow I will be better.”

Ben looked doubtful. “I hope you’re right.”

Cai smiled gently. “So do I.”

Leelany had found a good place to camp. It was a deep sandy cave, beneath a rocky outcrop curtained by the hanging branches of willow and ivy. Outside the entrance, protected by the outcrop and screened by the branches was a sandy patio perfect for a fire. It the balmy evening it was warm and sheltered. Leelany had already built a fire pit lined with stone and had constructed a nascent fire which she was fanning with her breath. She did not look up.

“Took your time. Go get twigs and firewood. Gabrielle, I have a tin in my bag, fetch water from the river and I will make coffee. I think that Cai might need some after his swim.”

“Lee…”

There was something in his voice that brought Gabrielle and Ben’s attention straight to him. Even Leelany looked up from the fire.

“I… don’t think I can…”

“Hell Cai…” One look at his face was enough for her to realise the state he was in. “... why did you have to be so bloody stubborn? Why didn’t you say you were struggling?”

“You didn’t… give me a chance.” Groaning he pressed his hand to his side and doubled over.

“Are you in pain?”

“Mmm.”

“Alright, come and sit down, let me take a look.”

Ben helped Leelany ease him down onto the sand, propped against the cliff wall. Leelany laid her hand on the side of his face.

“You have a fever.”

“I know.”

“How long?”

“Since we got here.”

“How bad?”

“I’ve had worse.”

“I know you’ve had worse, that isn’t what I asked.”

“Not too bad.”

“What about the pain?”

“That’s bad.”

“Are you finding it hard to breathe?” Cai looked up at Ben, surprised he had spoken, that he had dared with Leelany in control. He shook his head. “No, only that it hurts.” he smiled bitterly. “But then, everything hurts.”

Leelany was not so courteous and rounded on Ben. “Listen healer man. When you were in your white coat in that prison you call a… a… hospital… you had power over my brother. Here you are nothing. Without your machines and your poisons you are nothing. This is my world. Cai is my brother. Leave him to me.”

“As you said, I am a healer and your brother was my patient, still is as far as I am concerned so you will forgive me if I don’t leave him to you especially as you have been so considerate as to be pushing him past his limits for hours.”

“How dare you? You have been in this world for five minutes and you presume to challenge me. Let me tell you that without me you would not survive for ten minutes here so don’t push me or I might just decide to leave you to the wildlife.”

“Lee…”

“Isn’t that what you have been doing since you have been here? As far as I can see it’s your brother who has protected us… who has taken care of us. You were nowhere in sight.”

“I was scouting ahead. If there was trouble out there I would have been the first to find it.”

“But there wasn’t and you didn’t and you didn’t bother to look back for long enough to see what was happening to us.”

“How dare you speak to me like that? You have no idea what I was doing.”

“No, and I wonder if you did either.”

“Lee…”

“This is my world, healer boy; mine, not yours. Do not challenge me in it.”

“But that’s what you were doing isn’t it? Issuing a challenge?”

“What are you talking about?”

“You were jealous. Jealous of your brother and you wanted to prove to us… and to him that you are better.”

“That’s ridiculous. You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Lee…” Cai put a hand on her arm but she shook it off. She was furious, facing off to Ben and there were practically sparks flying from her eyes.

“Don’t I? So why, knowing he is hurt and sick did you not just lead us straight to the other camp site… on the other side of the river? Why did you push him into coming on to this one? Why did you keep the pace up so hard? You wanted him to fail. You wanted him to need your help.”

“That’s ridiculous. I would never do that. I would never deliberately hurt Cai, never…” Frowning she looked down at him and was shocked. Cai was looking anxious, knowing what his sister was like when she was openly challenged. He was concerned that a rift at this stage would put them all at risk because he knew that Leelany would not be averse to leaving the doctor behind if he pushed her too hard. Most of all he wanted the arguing over so that he could let go of the pain and release his consciousness to rest.

“I’m sorry Cai. I didn’t…”

“Lee, just… please just… I need to sleep.”

“Of course. Sit still.”

Leelany’s hands were trembling as she unbuttoned the sodden shirt. She had lost control, allowed herself to be carried away and in the process she had done the one thing she had sworn she would never do… she had hurt Cai. Guilt ate at her and she felt the doctor’s eyes on her and believed they would be mocking and triumphant. When she glared up at him she was surprised to see that, far from it, they were gentle and concerned.

The dressing covering the wound was soaked from river water and it wasn’t possible to tell how much of liquid that trickled down his side to pool in the waistband of his jeans was blood and how much was water.

“How long have you been bleeding?”

“Not sure. I think since the fight.”

“Why didn’t you say?”

“Wasn’t much. Needed to get away from there.”

“True but we could have stopped sooner.”

“You weren’t there.” Cai grunted as Leelany pulled away the dressing. The wound and the skin around it was angry and inflamed.

“You have an infection.”

“I know.”

“You know so bloody much. Why didn’t you say?”

“It’s no problem… you can fix it.” The absolute certainty with which he spoke the words, the absolute trust that he showed in her with them were like a knife slicing into Leelany’s heart. She had been so angry at Gabrielle for betraying her brother but hadn’t she just done that herself.

“It would have been easier if you had told me at the time. It wouldn’t have made any difference to our time if we had stopped for half an hour to brew some herbs. I could have dressed it hours ago.”

“Whatever.” He leaned back his head and closed his eyes, a frown between his brows. With a last worried look Leelany did what she did best and took charge.

“Gabrielle, go to the river and fetch water. Doctor man, make up the fire so that I can brew the water. I will collect the herbs I need. Cai, you rest and try not to get into any more trouble.” Without opening his eyes Cai smiled, the others hurried to their tasks.

Very soon there was a roaring fire, which they all found comforting. Leelany had set up a tripod of sticks over a part of the fire which she had raked to one side and burned lower and hotter than the main blaze and from it hung a tin in which a foul smelling brew was bubbling. Ben and Gabrielle were fishing in the river with a fishing rod made by Leelany from a stripped Hazel twig and gut and hook from her seemingly bottomless bag. Already three large bass were baking in the fire.

Cai was dozing and he jumped when Leelany knelt beside him.

“How are you feeling?”

“I’d be lying if I said I was well.”

“That bad huh?” they both grinned. Leelany was unduly subdued and Cai knew full well why.

“It’s alright Lee. I’m not angry with you so you should stop being angry with yourself now.”

“I should have known better Cai. I am supposed to look after you and protect you not make you sick.”

“You didn’t make me sick, the Sorcerer did that. You were right about making the best time we could, I know what will happen if we don’t get to the village before He is ready for another strike. You were right.”

“No, I wasn’t right. Even if the outcome is for the best my motives were not. The healer boy was right. I was angry that you sensed the demons when I did not, that you fought them without my help, that you didn’t seem to need me here. It was stupid but I felt that I should have been the one to rescue you, to rescue you all and you didn’t need rescuing. I was angry and spiteful and I pushed you, I pushed all of you but I should have known better. I did know. Of course I did. I knew you were hurt, I knew you wouldn’t be able to keep up the pace, I knew that eventually you would fail and I would have to rescue you… and that’s what I wanted, what I needed. I am so sorry Cai.”

“Hey… there’s no need to be sorry. You always rescue me. You always have. Don’t be sorry, don’t be angry, just be you, that’s what I need.”

She looked into his eyes for a long moment then shook her head. “You always see the best in everyone…. even me. I am not the person you think I am.”

“Yes you are. You’re my sister. You are my protector and you always look out for me. So shut up and look out for me. I’m sick and I hurt.” He was smiling, his eyes deep and warm. It only made her feel more deeply ashamed.