OK, it's been almost a year since my last entry. I'm bad!
And to be honest, I would manage to go longer without a post but 1) I'm bored and procrastinating, and 2) I need to vent. And I guess it's safe to do that here.
As many of you might have read, I'm moving to London soon. Well... end May at latest. We've done the plus points (Thanks Bob! ) and I persuaded my bf that it's best for us to move to London. I'm really looking forward to all that but I have to admit I'm scared.
I tend to underestimate myself... which makes it quite difficult to promote yourself on a CV when you're looking for a job. More so if you're a foreigner "from the East", self-conscious of your accent, vocabulary and lately as I've found out even grammar. I've studied or used English for over 18 years now, have an Advanced certificate from Cambridge yet I make basic mistakes when I speak without any preparation and my active vocabulary is much smaller than the passive one. How will I look at a hypothetical interview? I don't want to wait tables or do jobs "East Europeans" usually do when they are in the "West". I have two or three university degrees and two years of work experience after all. (I've been mostly free-lancing the years before.) Yet it might be not enough. Hell I'm not sure I would find a good job here now. So how can I be success in London?
I know I have some time still. And I know I can work on my English and not procrastinate writing non-sense blogs. But when I'm scared I won't be success, I tend to shuffle around, assessing the risks, thinking of how to do this to be perfect (yeah, I'm a perfectionist ) and I stall. I stall and think of what could turn bad, which usually means I discourage myself from doing it. But moving to London is not a thing I can run away from.
My boyfriend has been a massive help. He revamped my CV, he's basically the one who is looking for job opportunities for me and I love him terribly for what he does. It's just I'm scared people in UK won't understand me, or I won't understand them; that I won't be able to find a decent job which will complicate our settling down; that if I find a job I wouldn't be able to adapt to the work pace in London or they I will fail miserably,... I guess I could go on. But I'm also super-excited about moving in with the love of my life, sharing finally our lives together, discovering a new place, country, culture, and way of life... I'm leaving my country, my home, everything I knew and learnt in past 28 years, and I'm exchanging it for something new, exciting and challenging.
And now I feel like some attention seeker.