Back on July 16 @AC Benus posted a status update looking for volunteers to look at one of his poetry prompts. i thought about it, and decided to try.
(it's here, if you're interested https://www.gayauthors.org/profile/18130-ac-benus/?status=134349&type=status)
i'll show you the evolution in just a sec, but first i learned a couple of things i wanted to share.
These authors who post poems here are a very talented group.
They also work very hard on these offerings. It's not like they just spit the words out onto a page and VOILA! it's poetry. For the ones i know best, it's a long process. It could be days, or weeks before what they've written coalesces into something other than a pile of words. i've likened it to a painter, who blends the primary colors into just the PERFECT shade to convey the feeling. Our poets do that with words. Finding just the RIGHT word so their thoughts and feelings come though the page for the reader.
The poets here at GA are also brave. They've put their hearts onto the page, bared their souls for all to see. That, my friends, is bravery.
So, to AC's Poetry Prompt.
i really wanted to do it, so i PMd him and said i'd volunteer. He sent the link and i downloaded it, and read it. Not just once, but many times.
i started writing, and my first attempt was darn close to the syllable count (57577 is what a Tanka should be):
the lights on the tree
sparkle and dance bring
butterflies to my stomach
waiting for the morning
was never my strength
But there wasn't anything that tied together why waiting until morning is hard, and there was a hard stop after the third line, so back to the drawing board. The next attempt is a bit better but the syllable count is still off and there's still that pesky hard stop:
the lights on the tree
sparkle and dance on
on the packages below,
i'm giddy inside
to see what's in them
Whenever i had some quiet, or some downtime, i'd open the document and start to noodle around with it. i kept in touch with AC and shared some of my work.
He was, as he always is, gentle and supportive in his critiques and his guidance.
i thought a lot about his last email to me where he talked about how a person can say the same thing in many different ways, that blending of just the right words i talked about earlier. He said that putting the words in one order sounds like "everyday speech" but moving the exact same words around can make it musical. He went on to say that it takes practice, and that anyone writing poetry has to just write a lot to get a feel for it.
Here's the final evolution:
from across the room
the brightly wrapped packages
reflect the lights from
the tree above and i can't
wait to see what hides inside
i used the "self-check" tool that was in the prompt, and it seemed to check out. AC agreed. He also reminded me not to be too hard on myself as writing poetry takes work, and practice. Then, as is his style, he invited me to revisit this when the new prompts come out.
Am i glad i did the prompt challenge? Yes, i am. There were several times when i just wanted to stop, to give up. i was getting frustrated that i couldn't get it. But it's not in me to do that, so i did the best i could. Could i keep working at it? Sure, but i think i have learned what i needed to. And i gained some insight into the process, and perhaps a better appreciation for the poets among us.
Will you be looking at the new prompts?
- 8
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