I don't know about this Michael dude.

Ok, he does seem interested, but that doesnt mean he'll stop f**king around with the other guy( if he really is).

:hugs:

We'll have lots of fun if you come see me.

Hey Joe!

Seriously, I don't know why I even bother trying to figure out how he feels. I mean, I have a reliable source telling me that he's screwing around with another guy (I think it's his ex), but he still gives me signals that says he's interested.

Well if it is his ex I'm sure the whole thing is pretty complicated...interestingly enough I was in the exact same situation about a month or so ago. In the end I decided he wasn't over his ex and I'd just stay out of it. Well actually that was only one small part, I wasn't really that interested anyway and I don't think it woulda worked. Anyway you obviously ARE interested in this guy. I think the important thing is to figure out how you feel about him messing around with someone else.

Does it make you feel betrayed or cheated on? Or is it all cool since you guys aren't "together" anyway? I think the whole thing is a matter of subjectivity. No one is likely to blame someone completely unattached for flirting casually with one person and then an hour or so later flirting casually with another. It all just sort of escalates from there. People (myself definitely included) like to determine fidelity based on the "official" status of the relationship. "we're officially dating so you're all mine". Yet while that's how people tend to do it objectively that's seldom how they feel. Everyone can think of instances that have either happened to them personally or to someone they know, where the couple breaks up and then IMMEDIATELY afterwards one of the 2 people messes around with someone else. Is it wrong? **shrugs** depends on the 3 people involved. So I guess what you have to determin is whether or not this is an issue for YOU?

It's probably also important to think about whether or not this has any implication for future situations; does this make him more likely to cheat down the line if you guys were dating? Probably could go either way. Also ex's are a very unique situation.

I haven't been the most helpful person in this situation and haven't actually asked him about any of this so it's as much my fault as it is his, but still. If you're interested, then say so. If you're not, then tell me so I can f**king move on. I hate this kind of crap.

As you pointed out it is a two-way street; you haven't said you're interested either. JUST from reading you're blog I'd say you're both interested. You certainly seem to be, and if he's repeatedly gropping someone and complaining that they don't call him often enough then he can hardly be surprised if they think he's interested. So here's what I think you ought to do...it's probably what everyone thinks you ought to do...it's probably what you even think you ought to do: sit down and talk to him about all this stuff. I know it's no fun, and it'll make you feel vulnerable but given what's going on between you guys (as I'm reading it anyway) there's really no way it's going to seem completely stupid or out of the blue so even in the HIGHLY unlikely event that he's just completely oblivious and a hopeless flirt he's still not going to be too shocked and definitely not mean about it. and then you'll (probably) have a boyfriend or can move on. Also regardless of what happens I think it'll make you look good. If it completely works out (and I really think it will ), you'll have been the "strong" one who initiated everything. If it doesn't work out I don't see how he couldn't at least respect you for having the guts to do it.

Anyway I went way long and I doubt I'm in the top 2,000 people at this site qualified to offer relationship advice anyway. So take everything I say with a grain of salt lol.

Good luck though and let us know how it goes!!

Have an awesome day and take care,

Kevin

Hi Joe

Maybe he does like you, likes grabbing your ass, grabbing your crotch, AND likes having sex with his EX.

I think it's a matter both of your expectations and whether they match. He might want to hang out with you, fool around with you, but maybe not exclusively. It sounds like (and I could be wrong) that you want to date him and open up to him, but only if it's exclusive???

Unfortunately, the only way you're going to find out is if you communicate.

Too bad we couldn't find a way to get Michael to read your Blog, that would solve all the problems.

Anywhooo, if you do decide to give up men and women, there will always be room for you in the monastery I'm setting up

Take Care®,

Vic

I hope things work out with you and this guy. i barely started reading your blog today. Anyways, you seem like a nice enough guy. if he is indeed cheating on you with some other guy. The likelihood of him stopping, or telling you about it isn't very good. You can't let him play with you, cause the longer you stay with him, and the more your feelings grow, the harder its going to be for you, when everything is over. So you have to do something about this.

as for your hand being the source of all.... ecstasy. why let yourself and your body go to waste by not sharing?

not all men and women are alike. you can't let the acts of a few select individuals influence your decisions that will last the rest of your life.

hopefully i was of some help.

if not, then im sorry, for writting this useless comment.

i do hope things work out for the better for you.

Objectivist

I'm nodding at vic's post. Communicate. Say you know he's with somebody and you like the attention but it's weird. Get it settled. Maybe a little assgrabbin will be okay and he stays with the current, or he does the smart thing and dumps the ex and jumps you like a racehorse.

sorry.

But talk and get it resolved. Or shut up and enjoy it as it is, lOl.

At least you got somebody grabassin ya!

Anywhooo, if you do decide to give up men and women, there will always be room for you in the monastery I'm setting up

 

Take Care

your too cute to give up on love Joey and it really sucks not knowing where you stand and i know its not easy to actually put yourself out there and tell him how your feeling and ask him how he feels but everyone else is right when they say you should talk to him and find out what he is after with you so you know before you decide to go further ok rambling now

the trip sounds like it could be fun, just don't meet any members from GA they are all pervs who want your body

Joe, this guy might just be looking to put another notch in his bedpost with your initials next to it. Hey he is still screwing around with his ex. Just be careful, I wouldn't want to see you get hurt.

If you confront him now and get the answer you didn't want to hear......well better now than later.

Don't give up yet, sex alone is just that ...........alone.

Ex.

Wow...u really did like Michael...im feeling kinda bad now, like i stole u, or i may have been second choice...BUT i can tell you about Mikey lol, i love him to death, if you tell me what time it was i can tell you exactly who he was sleeping with, or if he was seeing someone. lately mike has been doing the whole multiple dating thing, not secret to them, he tells them exactly that he is dating others...i must say that i didnt know that u guys were even "talking"...but either way im still glad i have you, and i love you