(In)visible

[Forty-Two]

haha, I think you may be right. The story does tap away in my head something chronic, if I don't write it, headaches and sleeplessness will convince me otherwise. Yup, you hit the mark with that invested bit. Might add in stubborn there too. But my biggest problem is I just don't have faith in my writing sometimes. Oh, and besides that, I have another story that I need to finish before December that I will be only starting next week--that one has to be darn near perfect, haha. Sigh. Sweet. Thanks again for all the help,

 

Anyta

 

All the signs of a true writer... We all lose faith in our writing sometimes... that's when you take heart in what people say in a the discussion thread and in reviews and get your confidence back!

 

Don't you hate it when writing gets in the way of writing? Story of my life, I'll tell ya

 

You'll get it all done, I have faith!

[hh5]

 

 

 

So my guess is Rune left because he found out he had something to do with Dad's accident. By that I mean - his aura somehow did something that he believed caused the accident. I say this because the shirt Scott was wearing was invisible when he put it on - So there was some residual affect - and he left AFTER setting up the picnic which means he wasn't planning to leave when he woke up that morning. Something triggered the need to leave.

 

 

 

 

 

Andy

 

 

Maybe he was heading into town for sandwiches and other treats as you can not have just muffins and fruit. Unless the maggots and flies etc was the substitute to sandwich meat.

[Welshdude]

Brilliant once again:) I think Scotty will have come from this a little tougher (or atleast seem to be) especially if he he's the one now running the farm. Though with his dad and Rune both gone trust and abandonment will surely play a part. (MO of course:) As for the mystery surrounding Rune and his past....no idea. Can't wait for the next part, your a great writer.

[Benji]

........I think Rune overheard the phone call after he came back from setting up the picnic, saw the aftermath, and when he checked on Scott was consumed with guilt that everything he touched had went bad. Rune left because he did not want to cause anymore pain to Scott, in Rune's eyes he blames himself. BTW, That had to be the most evil cliffhanger ever here on GA (maybe even 2 if that is possible) .

 

Rune's return will be interesting, 2 years gives them both time to grow and for pain to heal. I think it might be fun to have Rune show up at Scott's school, and perhaps run interference to ...maybe some bullies? Next book will be enlightening, as Rune will now tell all to Scott!, the mystery to be revealed and more healing to begin! The locket carries secrets as does the watch.

 

Great story, do not stop with it!! Bad enough leaving us all evil cliffhangers!!!

[Agaith]

........I think Rune overheard the phone call after he came back from setting up the picnic, saw the aftermath, and when he checked on Scott was consumed with guilt that everything he touched had went bad. Rune left because he did not want to cause anymore pain to Scott, in Rune's eyes he blames himself. BTW, That had to be the most evil cliffhanger ever here on GA (maybe even 2 if that is possible) .

 

Rune's return will be interesting, 2 years gives them both time to grow and for pain to heal. I think it might be fun to have Rune show up at Scott's school, and perhaps run interference to ...maybe some bullies? Next book will be enlightening, as Rune will now tell all to Scott!, the mystery to be revealed and more healing to begin! The locket carries secrets as does the watch.

 

Great story, do not stop with it!! Bad enough leaving us all evil cliffhangers!!!

 

 

 

I concur with Benji that that was the most evil cliffhanger I have read! Arghhh need more!

 

That was an awesome with so much happening and the tragedy at the end.

There are many different directions that this story could be going so I'm not even going to try and guess what's going to happen. I will lie back and flow with the next chapter

 

Wonderful Anyta please keep going with it

[AnytaSunday]

We all lose faith in our writing sometimes... that's when you take heart in what people say in a the discussion thread and in reviews and get your confidence back!

 

Yeah, but that is a two-sided coin. lol, no, everyone here seems great and know the meaning of constructive criticism, so true, true.

 

 

Maybe he was heading into town for sandwiches and other treats as you can not have just muffins and fruit. Unless the maggots and flies etc was the substitute to sandwich meat.

 

 

*shudders at the maggot bit. I don't want to explain, it may give things away. Thanks for leaving a note.

[AnytaSunday]

Brilliant once again:) I think Scotty will have come from this a little tougher (or atleast seem to be) especially if he he's the one now running the farm. Though with his dad and Rune both gone trust and abandonment will surely play a part. (MO of course:) As for the mystery surrounding Rune and his past....no idea. Can't wait for the next part, your a great writer.

 

Welshdude, thanks so much, hehe. Scott come out a little tougher, eh? Hmmm, maybe in some respects, but not necessarily the best way. In other ways I think he loses a lot of confidence and self love. Thanks for your thoughts.

 

The mystery with Rune will come out very soon. Two to three chapters, I'd say. (at this point of planning, at least)

[Benji]

Welshdude, thanks so much, hehe. Scott come out a little tougher, eh? Hmmm, maybe in some respects, but not necessarily the best way. In other ways I think he loses a lot of confidence and self love. Thanks for your thoughts.

 

The mystery with Rune will come out very soon. Two to three chapters, I'd say. (at this point of planning, at least)

 

... Hehe, I notice little response from you!

[AnytaSunday]

........I think Rune overheard the phone call after he came back from setting up the picnic, saw the aftermath, and when he checked on Scott was consumed with guilt that everything he touched had went bad. Rune left because he did not want to cause anymore pain to Scott, in Rune's eyes he blames himself. BTW, That had to be the most evil cliffhanger ever here on GA (maybe even 2 if that is possible) .

 

Rune's return will be interesting, 2 years gives them both time to grow and for pain to heal. I think it might be fun to have Rune show up at Scott's school, and perhaps run interference to ...maybe some bullies? Next book will be enlightening, as Rune will now tell all to Scott!, the mystery to be revealed and more healing to begin! The locket carries secrets as does the watch.

 

Great story, do not stop with it!! Bad enough leaving us all evil cliffhangers!!!

 

Benji,

 

Hehehe, thanks for leaving this message. Interesting thoughts... All will slowly be revealed four years later when Scott meets Rune again.

 

As for the evil cliffhanger. I can only apologise. Funny, when I wrote it, I thought it established mystery, but didn't think of it as a hanger, lol. But I can see how it is one. Well, I will try my hardest to finish chapter five before I go on holiday, if I do, I'll post Friday. If I don't manage, it should be up a week later.

 

Having a follow up that is in school would be really interesting too. I could have chosen to go that way, but I decided (I have reasons, but I don't want to give them away yet) to set this just after Scott finishes highschool.

 

Thanks for leaving a note!

I concur with Benji that that was the most evil cliffhanger I have read! Arghhh need more!

 

That was an awesome with so much happening and the tragedy at the end.

There are many different directions that this story could be going so I'm not even going to try and guess what's going to happen. I will lie back and flow with the next chapter

 

Wonderful Anyta please keep going with it

 

There were so many ways I could have gone with this story, and probably someone else would come up with something better, but for my own reasons, I've decided on the one you'll read about in chapter five.

 

Thanks for reading and leaving a note. Love it.

 

[AnytaSunday]

Okay, I'm pleased to say I have finished chapter five. So, all going well, by friday it should be up.

 

I want to stress once more that there are so many ways this story could have developed, this is just the route I decided to go with. That fits the story as it is in my head.

[Andrew Q Gordon]

Anyta,

 

STOP apologizing already

 

The first four chapters are amazing - you really need to think about working with someone to get this published. I said this from the first chapter and I will keep saying it - this is so incredibly imaginative and creative. You give Scott and Rune such depth in a very short period of time that we feel them. I know Scott is more the focus but the way you have written about Rune is sort of heart breaking. His isolation, his turmoil - why we don't know exactly but clearly there is something so traumatic it has affected him deeply enough that he has tried to kill him self every year for three years, the hesitancy to act on his desires - even if just for friendship for get about romantic involvement with Scott - its crushing and make me hurt for him - Now I feel for Scott, just not as passionately - YET.

 

One thing that this post a chapter at a time format does is it builds anticipation that would otherwise be ruined in a novel where I would just turn to the next chapter and keep reading BUT I don't see that as detracting from the pull of the story. If you ever have self doubts about your skill - ask me, I will set you straig errr set you right I might be biased - for reasons you know but I wouldn't wax this long trying to convince you of this if I really didn't believe it.

 

Like I said, if you stop writing this I am on the next plane to where you live and I am going to haunt you til you finish this

 

Andy

[jian_sierra]

Anyta,

 

LOL to Andy's comments. I thought I was your biggest fan until I read his post. I won't ever hunt you down if you stop posting mainly because I can't afford it (I took out a loan which will take me 3 years to pay so basically I'm poor until that's finished), but I'll be very, very sad (I'm pathetic hehe). I have no idea what you have planned, but I'm pretty sure it's going to be great. You're meant to be doing this, writing stories. It's like your destiny and the fact that you love it is just perfect. I'll be honored when in the very near future, I'll tell this to my friends - 'Hey, I know this author. She's great. You should definitely buy her books.' Until then, thanks for sharing your talent to us

 

I just had a thought. I'm really hoping I'm not poor anymore when you get published. Otherwise, how can I possibly afford to read your stories

 

(I just realized that my post has very little to do with your story sorry).

 

John

[AnytaSunday]

Anyta,

 

STOP apologizing already

 

Lol! Shoot, I do apologize a bit, huh? hehe.

 

The first four chapters are amazing - you really need to think about working with someone to get this published. I said this from the first chapter and I will keep saying it - this is so incredibly imaginative and creative. You give Scott and Rune such depth in a very short period of time that we feel them. I know Scott is more the focus but the way you have written about Rune is sort of heart breaking. His isolation, his turmoil - why we don't know exactly but clearly there is something so traumatic it has affected him deeply enough that he has tried to kill him self every year for three years, the hesitancy to act on his desires - even if just for friendship for get about romantic involvement with Scott - its crushing and make me hurt for him - Now I feel for Scott, just not as passionately - YET.

 

I think invisible is for GA. I don't think this will get published. But I'm certainly working toward that goal. I have a book that I will start planning and writing soon, and I have hopes that I can get that one published. (We'll see, I guess) Of course, if it doesn't work out I'll be sad because I couldn't post it here either--well, I don't think many would read it. (It's two perspectives, two romances, one gay (but set in an extremely anti-gay dystopian world) and the other is a straight romance (see, I'll bore everyone).

 

One thing that this post a chapter at a time format does is it builds anticipation that would otherwise be ruined in a novel where I would just turn to the next chapter and keep reading BUT I don't see that as detracting from the pull of the story. If you ever have self doubts about your skill - ask me, I will set you straig errr set you right I might be biased - for reasons you know but I wouldn't wax this long trying to convince you of this if I really didn't believe it.

Like I said, if you stop writing this I am on the next plane to where you live and I am going to haunt you til you finish this

 

Andy

 

hehe... * runs to open word document. "I'm writing already!"

[AnytaSunday]

Anyta,

 

LOL to Andy's comments. I thought I was your biggest fan until I read his post. I won't ever hunt you down if you stop posting mainly because I can't afford it (I took out a loan which will take me 3 years to pay so basically I'm poor until that's finished), but I'll be very, very sad (I'm pathetic hehe). I have no idea what you have planned, but I'm pretty sure it's going to be great. You're meant to be doing this, writing stories. It's like your destiny and the fact that you love it is just perfect. I'll be honored when in the very near future, I'll tell this to my friends - 'Hey, I know this author. She's great. You should definitely buy her books.' Until then, thanks for sharing your talent to us

 

I just had a thought. I'm really hoping I'm not poor anymore when you get published. Otherwise, how can I possibly afford to read your stories

 

(I just realized that my post has very little to do with your story sorry).

 

John

 

Heya John,

 

Thanks for leaving a note. (ANd no, no, no, you are NOT pathetic). You're awesome, remember!

 

Hehe, yeah, I do love to write. Yay, I can't wait to see a book on mine on the shelf, shoot, I'll be proud. Still, if I'm being realistic, it's many years of honing the craft away yet. But I'll enjoy each moment.

 

I can't say how great it is having you and Andy as writing support. You really rock!

 

Anyta

[AnytaSunday]

Okay, Chapter FIVE is up! here

 

Now, feel free to leave whatever discussion points you have. I'm mighty curious at what people think about the route I've chosen. I will reply to everything left here, I promise, but it won't be until I get back from holiday, in about a week.

 

I've got the next bit of the story in my head, and look forward to continuing with it soon. (I promised the hubs no working while on holiday--he thinks I need to relax, so if I manage to finish a chapter for next week, after the trip, it'll be a short one. But don't worry, I'll be right back onto things when I get back, all going well.

 

Thanks so very much for all your support. Yay!

[Benji]

Okay, Chapter FIVE is up! here

 

Now, feel free to leave whatever discussion points you have. I'm mighty curious at what people think about the route I've chosen. I will reply to everything left here, I promise, but it won't be until I get back from holiday, in about a week.

 

I've got the next bit of the story in my head, and look forward to continuing with it soon. (I promised the hubs no working while on holiday--he thinks I need to relax, so if I manage to finish a chapter for next week, after the trip, it'll be a short one. But don't worry, I'll be right back onto things when I get back, all going well.

 

Thanks so very much for all your support. Yay!

 

............ No that he is back, will Rune make it right, or will he make Scott chase after him? 4 years is a long time and they are both shocked at seeing each other. Why did Rune come back? Hell of a mystery! Great chapter!

[AnytaSunday]

............ No that he is back, will Rune make it right, or will he make Scott chase after him? 4 years is a long time and they are both shocked at seeing each other. Why did Rune come back? Hell of a mystery! Great chapter!

 

 

Thanks so much for leaving a message. hehe. Yes, there are a few mysteries to be unraveled, some will be coming out sooner rather than later too. I'll see to posting a little something soon. Cheers.

[hh5]

For rune, Good question ... did he mello out ... or is he more or less the same ... gotten a bit hard from the four years (guilt)

 

For Scott, his mom sure miss a few shrink appointments, Scott seem to have to deal with things ... being the man of the house ... but whats happening with the berries? Did they hire help?

I presume its a business that the mother now has to run ... or does Scott get involved?

 

A lot of separate growing up for the two.

[AnytaSunday]

For rune, Good question ... did he mello out ... or is he more or less the same ... gotten a bit hard from the four years (guilt)

 

For Scott, his mom sure miss a few shrink appointments, Scott seem to have to deal with things ... being the man of the house ... but whats happening with the berries? Did they hire help?

I presume its a business that the mother now has to run ... or does Scott get involved?

 

A lot of separate growing up for the two.

 

Rune, in my mind he's not gotten particularly hard, though... hmmm, I don't feel I can say more without giving certain things away. I will aim to post two chapters this week (or early next) I think in them things will start to get more defined.

 

As for Scott's mom... hehe, the shrink appointments, this will be mentioned at some point. Scott has def. hardened up, but not in all likeable ways, though, perhaps understandable. And, this will become more clear too, but they moved away from the farm and into the city. I guess, I didn't make enough reference to that in the last chapter. I was trying really hard not to bog the reader down in too many details--it's easy to information dump after such a gap period of four years. I do hope to try weave more of this stuff in though, just subtely, slowly. Huh, I'm still learning with this writing business--it's a challenge, so I'm going to keep working on finding that balance.

 

I hope to get some time very soon to write more. I'm tempted to see if I can finish the story before November. But, well, we'll see.

 

Thanks for leaving a message,

 

Anyta

[hh5]

they moved away but not sold the farm? well that will give a place for Rune to stay ... if he was smart to come back and find it abandoned and then he found Scott at the resturant

 

Does this take place in New Zealand ... maybe Rune is an alien and he thinks he's human

 

Oh u not thing of endding in 14 chapters ... it could go on for 30 more ... in one two books

 

you write very well in the craft ... so you have been writing before in other means?

 

Rune, in my mind he's not gotten particularly hard, though... hmmm, I don't feel I can say more without giving certain things away. I will aim to post two chapters this week (or early next) I think in them things will start to get more defined.

 

As for Scott's mom... hehe, the shrink appointments, this will be mentioned at some point. Scott has def. hardened up, but not in all likeable ways, though, perhaps understandable. And, this will become more clear too, but they moved away from the farm and into the city. I guess, I didn't make enough reference to that in the last chapter. I was trying really hard not to bog the reader down in too many details--it's easy to information dump after such a gap period of four years. I do hope to try weave more of this stuff in though, just subtely, slowly. Huh, I'm still learning with this writing business--it's a challenge, so I'm going to keep working on finding that balance.

 

I hope to get some time very soon to write more. I'm tempted to see if I can finish the story before November. But, well, we'll see.

 

Thanks for leaving a message,

 

Anyta

[AnytaSunday]

they moved away but not sold the farm? well that will give a place for Rune to stay ... if he was smart to come back and find it abandoned and then he found Scott at the resturant

 

Does this take place in New Zealand ... maybe Rune is an alien and he thinks he's human

 

Oh u not thing of endding in 14 chapters ... it could go on for 30 more ... in one two books

 

you write very well in the craft ... so you have been writing before in other means?

 

 

 

Hehe, the mom did sell the farm, used the money to move to the city. I've tried to avoid city names so that it can sort of take place anywhere--okay, granted, anywhere where there's sea. But I imagine it somewhere in the states, as I liked the idea of Rune having traipsed a lot of the countryside before having met Scott.

 

As for how long this book will be, I don't think it will be too long. I imagine around the 60-80,000 word mark. 80 is my average for my stories so far, I guess I see this as a relatively gentle ride, but who knows, maybe there's room for this to grow. I want to finish by November though, because I have another project I have to write before the end of the year.

 

And writing. I love it. I started to take the craft seriously for about a year and three months or so now. I'm still at an experimental stage, trying new things and gauging reactions. lol, I actually studied philosophy at university with the thought that learning to view things from other perspectives (and other moral ambiguities) could be a good quality for a writer. I guess one could say I've wanted this for a long while...

 

I will work some more on this story tomorrow. I can't wait!!!

[Andrew Q Gordon]

In reading these comments I started looking to see if I made any of the same, then realized I forgot to post my thoughts. I knew you were on holiday and not going to read them right away so I took my time to read it a second time before writing, then I forgot - **Hangs head in embarrassment**

 

Okay - Since others have commented already, I will work my thoughts in around those.

 

Scott is about what I expected, thought the obsession with Rune 4 years later was not exactly something I saw coming - it seems like it set up the later part of the Chap 5 quite well however - more in a second.

 

It was clear as day to me they sold the farm - got that loud and clear. I was sad when I read how Scott's first was a trick in public bathroom, and I could feel his anger toward Rune for that - the whole Scott sleeps with woman - is it because he is afraid to have feelings for men? or because he is afraid to fall in love again and knows he won't fall for a woman?

 

I guess I missed this in Chapter 4 but I thought Dad suggested pancakes and Scott agreed. I didn't think he asked/begged/demanded them. Of course that might be the point - he didn't do any of the above but is blaming himself nevertheless. Gotta read these two chapters again.

 

One of the things I am most struck with when reading this is the depth of Scott's emotions you are giving us. Wow is an overused word for me with your work, but it fits. Your ability to put into words his angst is amazing. I feel it but more than that I understand it - hell I don't always understand my own angst that well.

 

Last thing, there are things I see that I won't comment on because in the past when I post stuff I either give something away or don't get it yet because it is a set up to what is to come. Leave it that I am intrigued as to where this is going and am damn glad you are back from holiday to keep us enthralled

 

Andy

[AnytaSunday]

In reading these comments I started looking to see if I made any of the same, then realized I forgot to post my thoughts. I knew you were on holiday and not going to read them right away so I took my time to read it a second time before writing, then I forgot - **Hangs head in embarrassment**

 

Okay - Since others have commented already, I will work my thoughts in around those.

 

Scott is about what I expected, thought the obsession with Rune 4 years later was not exactly something I saw coming - it seems like it set up the later part of the Chap 5 quite well however - more in a second.

 

It was clear as day to me they sold the farm - got that loud and clear. I was sad when I read how Scott's first was a trick in public bathroom, and I could feel his anger toward Rune for that - the whole Scott sleeps with woman - is it because he is afraid to have feelings for men? or because he is afraid to fall in love again and knows he won't fall for a woman?

 

I guess I missed this in Chapter 4 but I thought Dad suggested pancakes and Scott agreed. I didn't think he asked/begged/demanded them. Of course that might be the point - he didn't do any of the above but is blaming himself nevertheless. Gotta read these two chapters again.

 

One of the things I am most struck with when reading this is the depth of Scott's emotions you are giving us. Wow is an overused word for me with your work, but it fits. Your ability to put into words his angst is amazing. I feel it but more than that I understand it - hell I don't always understand my own angst that well.

 

Last thing, there are things I see that I won't comment on because in the past when I post stuff I either give something away or don't get it yet because it is a set up to what is to come. Leave it that I am intrigued as to where this is going and am damn glad you are back from holiday to keep us enthralled

 

Andy

 

Hehe, you're all good, Andy. No problem.

 

Oki-doki, Scott sleeping with woman--I view it as he just can't quite go there--let himself be with guys who he does find more attractive, at this point in time (until he has closure of some sort). I imagine that touching another guy brings back the memories rich and hurtful to Scott, and he's not quite gotten over it yet. In fact, I doubt he'll get over it without understanding what happened (or perhaps with much more time).

 

In chapter four, the Dad suggests pancakes knowing that they are Scott's favorite, BUT only after Scott first mentions them in his idea to become a cook when he's older. You can probably tell why Scott hasn't furthered his interest in becoming a cook... But of course it's not Scott's fault at all, but grief warps things, and that's the way he sees it. Also, it's easier, in some ways, to manage the pain and grief if you know what happened. This way Scott blames himself for his dad's death and the way his mother is--and he punishes himself for it, in not treating himself with much respect--like the random sex he has.

 

I just finished writing a part that probably should have been added to the last chapter, but I'll make a short chapter--I'll get that up soonish, I hope. I know though, that there's something not quite right in the second half of it--the writing sort of lacks. But the content is necessary for the story development. Rrrr. hehe.

 

Well, I'd better get back to writing the next chapter...

[Forty-Two]

Just a quick mention - I also had no problem realizing they had sold the farm and were living in the city.

 

"...our house must be the cleanest in the city..."

"Would we still be at the farm?"

"All the furniture I

[AnytaSunday]

Just a quick mention - I also had no problem realizing they had sold the farm and were living in the city.

 

"...our house must be the cleanest in the city..."

"Would we still be at the farm?"

"All the furniture I'd had at the farm was here too..."

 

I think that's a pretty good indication.

 

 

hehe, sweet... I have been crazy writing today and have gotten a bit done, so next part(s) are coming soon...