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Laying It On The Line

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Hello everyone!  


I wanted to introduce who I was and lay everything on the line here and ask for some advice.


I am 34 years old, and I am gay.  There, I said it, or typed it rather.  I have never told anyone my feelings in my entire life.  Anyone.  That means that I am still a virgin.


I think I first noticed that I was “different” when I was twelve years old and went skinny dipping with a friend of mine.  Even through my teenage years however, I lied to myself time upon time, thinking that I was only “curious.”  Only in the past few years have I finally let my barrier down and told myself that I was gay.


Since finding the stories on this web site and over at Nifty, I began to get bolder.  I sheepishly and discreetly made a post on Craig’s List asking if anyone was looking for a relationship.  There was one person who wanted me to come over, and I considered it and almost jumped in, but thankfully, I came to my senses.  


You see, I don’t just want sex and give up my virginity on a whim.  I am lonely and want companionship and to be loved for who I am and love another in return.  But I’m still stuck hiding.  I realize that things have changed, especially in the past few years, but I don’t feel comfortable coming out of the closet, not even to my own family.  I live rurally in the south, and I just don’t know how to meet people that are gay.  Personally, I only know of one other gay person, and we never got along while growing up (we went to the same school).  


Do you have any advice?




After writing the above, I took my first glance at the forums here, and one of the first posts was asking about 18+ virgins.  Hmmm…I think I have all of them beat :)  Anyway, still looking for advice.




Patrick Jason


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All I can do is welcome you to the community, I'm afraid. :) Which I will do, openly. Good to have you here, Graywolf. I hope you find the advice you're looking for here, and the happiness you're seeking in your life.

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I just came out this year, Mr. Wolf. I am a 45 year old man.

You are in good company here and you will find your story repeated like a plaintive echo across the canyons of our collective experiences.

I used Meetup to find guys. Now i host Meetups. I just posted pictures of my new me...I finally see the person I always wanted to in the mirror.


Welcome! :hug:

Edited by MrM
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Welcome to GA Patrick... :)


I don't have a degree to give suggestions like a counselor do. Though I have some experiences with the gay meeting. It not easy, never easy for the matter.


Just give the guy some space and communicate freely. Show a great sense of humor not the Flirty or Dirty ones though. Say everything with your eyes rather than Your words.


Never expect it is going to work, Life is not a fictional story, just try it out. And remember no person is perfect. You have compromise with their faults and adjust some times...


Hope this will help... :)

Anyway welcome to GA...

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Welcome to GA and to the greater LGBT community. :D :D :D


The road ahead of you is going to be challenging, but few things in life are easily achieved. If you feel up to it try to write a story or a poem; it helps to vent out some of your frustrations and express your emotions.


As for Companionship, I know what you mean I've been on that hunt for a decade now almost.

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Hi Patrick, welcome to GA.


Finding a partner is like finding a job. It takes work, and networking is your best strategy. Online communities may help some. Finding a discussion group that shares one of your interests, or an organization affiliated with your career wouldn't hurt. Especially if they meet in a nearby city, so you could visit the city and meet up with folks. Lots of couples now meet online.


Somebody suggested the best way to meet a companion is to do the things you enjoy, and see who enjoys them with you. At least, you'll start out with something in common.


Good luck and good hunting!

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Somebody suggested the best way to meet a companion is to do the things you enjoy, and see who enjoys them with you. At least, you'll start out with something in common.

Yeah it is a good suggestion Patrick... It may workout and give a knowledge of what You both Like too... :)

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Wow, thanks everyone!  It's nice to be accepted and welcomed, and this place is doing both.  At the least, it makes feeling alone a little easier to deal with.  


As for writing, I am a writer of sorts, but when it comes to a fictional story, I just don't seem to be able to get it down on paper.  I have had great story ideas in the past, yet barely get past the first page before I stop.


I look forward to being a part of this community.

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  • Site Administrator

If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to ask. The FAQs are a good place to check first, and feel free to contact any of the moderators if you have any questions you would prefer to keep private.


I hope you enjoy it here! :D

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