Cia

The sound of beeping disturbed my sleep. I was determined to ignore it, but Dav moved from under me. I protested when I landed on the cool sheets, reaching for him. "That's the door alarm, Ellis. My cell phone won't work in here." I blinked a few times, opening my eyes reluctantly as I rolled over onto my back. I realized I was still naked, so I pulled the sheet on the bed up to my waist. As much as I enjoyed watching the tight muscles in Dav's back flex, including his firm ass, I didn't want

Trust you to have this story be so dramatic and emotional and still be a happy ending. I don't know that I would have forgiven him. Not for the infidelity, but for waiting for that moment to finally come clean, a moment that should have been pure joy and became tainted by lies. Your main character was a coward, yet you made the reader care for him as we felt his emotions and his fear to lose his fiance. Great job.

I have plantar fasciatis and a bone spur on both heels, but instead of the arch hurting or the back of my heel, it's right off to the inner side of each heel. I never would have guessed what it was based on where it was hurting and how it hurt. It took a trip to the podiatrist and an x-ray to be told... lose weight. Thaaaanks! I hope your mother's back holds up and good luck on figuring out what is happening with you, living in pain sucks.

There are many reasons I'm an atheist. #1 is that I don't like people who use their 'religion' whatever that is, as an excuse to hurt others. Physically or emotionally... it's a shitty and illogical excuse. It sounds like you were subjected to both, though the emotional harm seems worse than the physical. You sound like a good son, but remember, your mother has a duty to be a good parent. You are not obligated to subject yourself to anything that harms your wellbeing for someone else and anyone that asks you to do that is wrong. I hope things get better for you.

Time and place matter quite often just as much as the characters a writer puts in place in a story, I agree. One thing that that isn't mentioned fully in setting the scene is how it should impact the reader in ways other than just appropriateness to the storyline. How you show them matters just as much as how you pick where the action happens, in my mind, when it comes to making it work in the story. The best way to bring the story to life is to make sure to bring the place your characters are in to life through their senses. Comicfan mentioned the quiet of the library and the possible ancient documents. So... consider showing a dim room to protect those fragile papers by writing a character that is barely breathing as they stare from a bare inch away at the crabbed script and imagines they can still smell of the ancient plant dyes used in the faded brown ink. Or, have a character grieving at the graveside of a beloved grandmother suddenly smell a whiff of her sugar cookies and then can feel the warmth and softness of a hug sorely missed and needed. Use the character's senses to bring the setting they are in to life and link the two together; the reader will enjoy the story just that much more.

Another recent article about this was brought to my attention, here. At least the company isn't running in fear from bigots.

Sorry for the late welcome to GA, Friday! I'm glad you enjoy the stories on the site, there are many wonderful stories by many amazing authors here. Welcome again!

Junk food is scary. Peeps are basically a non-food. The chemicals in twinkies include sulfuric acid and lime. They also have polysorbate 60, which is in thousands of processed foods, yet the Journal of National Cancer Institute has said it can cause detrimental reproductive effects, organ cancer, and toxicity in high doses. Yeah... I'm reaching for locally grown fruit the next time a sweets craving hits me.

Totally not confused Kristopher, and welcome to GA!

You have a good beginning and hook to this story. The whole long lost prince thing can definitely be a fun plot twist. It'll be interesting to see where you go from here. Good start Cyn, now keep going!

Well I have a very weird family. I grew up with my Dad and Uncle. My dad remarried when I was 9 and I was instructed to call the first mom I ever had by 'mom'. Then I met my mom and ex-stepdad when I was 11. I called her mom as well, since she was my mother, but my stepdad was Mike. I was/am close to my bio dad so while I love my stepdad, his name is just what fit for us. Tha threw them quite a bit, since they are south/east coast types where it is very disrespectful for kids to use adults names. I never picked up the habit or used Mr./Ms. with adult's first names though and they got over it. Both my husband and I call our inlaws by their names. We don't do the whole 'dad/mom' thing, though my sister and her husband do. It's just about what works for you personally, and your family. It can be made up of many different types of people that come and go from your life at different times. I have cousins who I have not acknowledged being family that I call by their last names as I would a stranger, and yet growing up had the third cousin of my stepsister's dad (my stepmom's ex husband) consider me a cousin and both of us freak out because we were 'family' and someone asked us if we were flirting. Gross! When it comes to showing your ties, and affection for those in your family, nothing is right or wrong; it just comes down to what is acceptable for everyone involved. Sometimes it evolves and changes as the relationships change. For the original poster, if you're still interested, I think that is what you want to show the most. Make sure the names or titles used fit the relationship and the setting, then go with it. You've gotten some great examples here.

The problem isn't about finishing school, or how smart you are or are not. It's not about how you could possibly choose to explain away your 'failing' that was so harshly pointed out by someone with little tact and no compassion. Soft spots exist and there is always something out there that can be used to make you feel bad. The shitty thing is that there will always be assholes who take advantage of that. The best way to make it better is to face why you feel so sensitive about the subject and then DO something about it. Resolve it for yourself, however you need to. This time it was your education, next time it might be your appearance, or a clumsy moment, or a missaid phrase. You can't always change what others ridicule you with. Oh, and just trust that those of us who care about you would never think like that. P.S. Imagining that person, giving them a good swift kick in the nads and watching them crumple can be a pleasant way to spend a few minutes.

Oregon Trail! Seriously, that was the first, and only, pc game I ever played. *holds up shield* Don't throw stones at me! I always enjoyed seeing how many cruel and unusual ways I could kill my settlers. *comes to a deep river* Should you ford the river here or look for another crossing? FORD! Are you sure? Hell yeah, ford that bad boy! *tragedy strikes* You just lost 2 oxen, 3 bags of flour, 1 rifle, and 2 settlers. SCORE! (snickers. Yes, I am evil!)

No no... I have projects for you to look at. You are so not caught up! Okay... I'm lying. Must be my fevered brain playing tricks on me. Had you going though, didn't I?

Interesting beginning. You certainly lay the groundwork for an elaborate fantasy. Even better, you left me with a lot of questions about what is going on, which would make me want to keep reading. That's always essential in a good fantasy story. I sort of picked up on the lesions and then the 'creatures' having a similar sort of skin, so I wasn't super shocked about the creature turning into a boy. The whole 'virus' thing was unclear for Shay though. Was it something he picked up on the new planet? Has he always had it? If so, why does it let him change the creature to a human, if the virus performed the changes it was always meant to to his DNA? How did an 'earth' virus have anything to do with whatever is going on at the new planet? See, lots of questions, lol. I would advise getting a beta and/or editor though. The chapter is pretty clean of mistakes, but there were some awkward phrases and your flow could have used a little help. Having a team is essential, imo, to help your writing really evolve.

Hmm... what is Ellis? What could he be in a world that has had Carthera and humans side by side, but never together before? A world of mostly science, but sometimes magic too. I guess you'll just have to wait to find out, LOL! Thanks for the review Pat, good to see you on GA

That you re-read this story is a huge compliment! I only do that with stories I really love too. Dav and Ellis are two of my favorite characters too.

LOL! Thanks. The story goes where it goes. I'm back in the flow now though, so hopefully it stays just as good without the breaks. Thanks for the review M!

I gasped, jerking up as my eyes shot open. My hand was clenched in Dav's shirt, and I was still in his arms. Dav's hand rested on my cheek, easing the slight sting from where he'd been hitting me. I vaguely recalled him calling my name. "What?" I looked around and brought one hand up to my mouth to soothe the burning pain. I pulled my fingers away and stared at the red stain. It hadn't been a nightmare. The smell was awful, and I could barely stand the taste in my mouth. "I'm sorry, I know yo

snuggles

Their meeting is featured in the story 'Figuring It Out' that I did for the last anthology. I do plan to continue their story for the next anthols as well.

I grew up with a stepmother who made hurtful, yet seemingly innocous, comments into an art form. I'm very aware of those little things that get said that are casual at first glance, but can really sting. I'll be the first to admit to not having a filter, but I try never to insult a person based on their appearance or anything like that. I can't say as I've not hurt people's feelings unmeaning to, though. Thinking before you speak is never bad advice.

That was cute, and I really liked the way you did the 'It Wasn't Me'. The monologue style really worked for this too.

Sorry, but in all relationships trust is vital. From what you say, there's not much trust between the two of you. Not to mention, yeah, your partner can and will annoy you at times, but it seems like you spend more time upset, irritated, or frustrated with this guy than not. You have to decide if the relationship is worth taking the time to work through your problems. I'd suggest speaking to him face to face, with honesty, about how you feel. If you can work it out, more power to you, if not *shrugs*. A relationship should take some work, but you shouldn't feel like you have to manage it constantly.

Thank you Bill! I wanted to keep it simple. I'm glad you enjoyed the story.