carringtonrj

Interesting thoughts. For me, I sort of believe that anything is possible. I have a very strong preference, but given the right person, I reckon I could give it a go. Plus, for me, personally, all first times, with anyone, are pretty nervous and non-perfect experiences, so trying with a new gender for the first time is bound to be tricky, I'd guess, but the second or third time ... woohoo!

Interesting.

You write precisely and evocatively. The sex scene was powerful but disturbing, as you intended. Everything is rendered with a sense of authenticity but without ladling history in for the sake of it. The story advances intriguingly and the characters are well developed. Good job.

shop local is good. i'm lucky to live in a small town with a good range of shops. not everyone has the choice these days. generally, i like to be realistic but optimistic. modern technology offers us so many opportunities. if balanced with more real life encounters, it can be an amazing asset. there'll never be a substitute for "in the flesh" get togethers, though, will there?

That's a lot of stuff there, J! It's not easy to find the right person to be with. People have their own issues and project them onto you. Don't feel bad about yourself because someone lets you down or mistreats you. Friendship, I think, is just as important as romance, and it's clear that you have friends here as well as irl. So there are things to feel good about. As for 4 months of doing nothing - yes, please! Maybe you can sublimate some of these strong feelings into your writing and create wonderful stuff?? Anyhow, you seem like a good guy to me, and I'm sure other people see that too, so hang in there ... It's all before you: brilliant, wonderful, exciting things. And that really special person is just waiting around for you to bump into him - or rather he's steadily, unknowingly making his way towards the amazing moment when you two meet and everything changes in an instant! Forgive the rambling response, just wanted to sympathise and try to give you a lift!

I feel the same more and more. Men are still very trapped by stereotypes, in some ways more than women these days.

Lots of interesting detail, creating a scene very convincingly, but lightly. the drama of the elephants is very well pitched. and then the sudden sex reference at the end gives the chapter a whole new feel. liked it.

You capture the scene neatly, without too much history shovelled in. it seems authentic and interesting. a strong sense of family relationships developed with a lightness of touch.

it's a very different kind of story to what i usually see here. you write really well, with an eye for detail and strong sense of character. thanks for the read. i will follow on.

A proper story, really carefully constructed.

Beautifully handled. Pace perfect. Sombre stuff. You write so well.

enjoyed reading. but i've decided, just to be different, to be on amanda's side. she's misunderstood. people keep blaming for things that were just accidents. it's tough being the principal's kid. and she's a closet lesbian. or am i making my own story up now? seriously, good job KC. sorry to hear you've had troubles to deal with.

"Beauty is a moment: in which you see someone for who they really are."

Another well-worked chapter. I'm with sorgbarn about amanda. i want to see into her twisted soul a little, rather than have her develop (or not develop, perhaps) into a mere bully and nothing else. it will be interesting to see how you work with her. oh, and bring on the romance KC - foreplay is all well and good, but ... Really, it's a great story, carefully put together and subtle. Wish i could write so well.

You capture the situation very neatly - a believable school set up with all the usual suspects, but with lots of original touches. Nice.

you handle the busy scenes very well.

Building up nicely. Hint of possible romance in the air; dark issues to deal with too. Expert storytelling.

Jasper, I did wonder, like some of those who reviewed it when it was first posted, if it was finished or not. Seems like Duncan Ryder hasn't posted anything for a while, but I don't know any more.

Good metaphor. Good way with words.

It's a classic opening. Very well handled. A new beginning, a past to be unravelled, well observed family exchanges, all rolling along very well. Some really precise and interesting desrciptive details. Very find writing I'd say. Wonder what's going to happen.

Thanks Renee for putting this together. Feel proud to be in amongst such great stories!

You set out some clear and strong arguments here. I do see hopeful signs that things aren't as bad as this all over, but sadly we do have a long way to go before tragedies like the one you relate here are a thing of the past. A worthwhile story, well written. Thanks.

Enjoyed reading it. Thanks. Jake is such a popular boy! I thought it might be Kevin, but you kept the mystery going well throughout.

Sweet story. Really well handled and developed. Characters are interesting and credible, their situation unusual and touching. Enjoyed it, thanks.

Enjoyable story, interesting, believable characters, handled with a lightness of touch. Thanks for the read.