mayday

Life's struggles indeed...

Here also are those who cry for finance and economy over life. They forget others are living beings, too. Not different from any of us in their vulnerability to pathogens, whatever they may be. What life and human dignity are worth to us can be seen in how we treat others and their lives, especially the vulnerable and those who cannot defend themselves. Treat them like you would like anybody to treat you. I doubt that all those who now prefer the (former?) status quo, the reign of money and shareholders unchained, have ever considered how dangerous this virus may get, even to themselves, if left to go virulent in our societies and mutate further. They must feel so beyond its reach. So invulnerable. I remember a short old fairy tale without magic in it. It tells a story about a young family with a little boy. The grandfather is old, his weak hands tremble and he cannot eat anymore without spilling. He cannot help soup running down his chin. The young couple banish him from the family meals to a dark corner and give him a wooden bowl and spoon that cannot be broken. The grandfather suffers in silence. One day the little boy is on the floor playing with pieces of wood. The proud young father asks his son what he is making. "I am making a bowl for you and mother to eat from when you are old." Then they reconsider and take the grandfather back in their midst and do not shame him for his age and his weakness. This virus has shown us so much stupidity, blindness and arrogance, especially in powerful male politicians and thoughtless airheads, that I need every instance of goodness, love and helpful neighborly assistance there is to remind me that not all hope is lost for humanity.

I don't agree with the idea of Chase paying back anything. I am sure he is just reacting, feelings rather than reason have taken over and I can understand that. He has been made feel guilty so long, had been purposely estranged from friends by Hank and now he finds out that Hank had not really seen him as he is. He is right to be wary. Hank seeing a therapist is progress, but not the answer to everything. I was sure that Hank would need somebody else to see the light. But in Julio you have picked a perfect candidate in my eyes, not anyone they both knew well, somebody who would be neutral, would not take sides because what would be the point? But what good a friend nonetheless! Now I wonder how that conversation will go. And you know what: I have not got a clue. There are so many things that can go wrong here... You are at your cliffhanger best again. Thanks for a great chapter today! And happy Easter - what is left of it!

The earth will not miss us. Definitely not. Yet we might still correct our course and aim for a future, not just a present. We might, though I doubt it. Love your poems!

I agree with many of the above: We will have to wait another week for the next chapter. You are not making that easy! Three wonderful conversations. I love how you give us a look back to the Yukon, the chance to see a a deliriously happy Dawson. I see a real change in Hank during their talk and at last, a lot of surprising new insights into Hank's development and their friends' feelings. Great chapter. Thank you once more.

There is a rhythm to your first two sentences, suggesting hope and spring coming ....

lovely flashes

Mhm. God of small things. Thief of small things. I am wondering where this will be taking us to... Interesting start.

Love it, Gary!!! What a great chapter and lots of ups and downs - you know how to build suspense! I love how we get to see everything from Dawson's point of view contrasting with Brent's commentary, how we can see Dawson's doubts emerging slowly and how they are whisked away with their openness in the end. Beautiful scenes. But I CANNOT imagine what Brent ever saw in Perry... Thank you for this wonderful chapter!

I enjoyed this chapter very much, and I admire Chase for the way he is dealing with his emotions and the challenges he faces. Having such a father is helping as well. I wonder what will make both Chase and Hank see what they are blind to. A nasty meeting with Kevin? Rex? Their friends? At the moment I feel that Hank needs much more support than Chase. He seems to have most to learn and to go through. Does he even realize how jealous he feels? Riding a bike now when he always preferred running? Doing what Chase usually did with Dawson... Somehow I get the feeling that there won't be many more chapters to follow. I am not sure whether I want to be wrong or right in that. Thanks for another moving chapter.

Finally. Grant did it. Interesting that it came at a moment when he was rather exhausted. As if his usual strength would have been in the way... Why should Troy make Grant suffer for that? We all make mistakes. We all try to evade their consequences. But Grant showed his courage and did what could have been their undoing. He was lucky, but why should he not be? I would not have expected a lot of people to stay open and still be able to think after that roller-coaster-ride of emotions Troy went through. I guess Grant might have needed the safety-net of his new friends and their support to give him the courage to "get it out". And I guess neither Brian, Aaron nor the girls knew how crucial a role they played in that. A great chapter. Again. Thank you for your wonderful story!

I agree, definitely subconsciously! And yes, he seems to have lost hope.

What Danners says above has opened my eyes to what I felt vaguely without being able to put it into words. I guess a lot depends on what happened to Hank previously and how he dealt with these experiences. Some people are very good at looking out for others and caring for their needs while they should not neglect their own wounds. If all of Hank's old wounds have also been ripped open with Chase's refusal and rejection, how will he cope? Then he really needs more than one helping hand. In a way I cannot get Hank's last sentence out of my mind: "Bring Rex back whenever you want.” I do not know why but I get the feeling it is the first time that he left a decision, even such a minor one, to Chase. Before he always seemed to be in control somehow. Am I wrong? It could also simply be signs of a bad conscience for taking Rex away from Chase for a weekend. Or Rex reminded him too much of Chase while he was away? Again a lot of developments which seem to thicken the plot inside their heads... hard to wait for the next chapter, but what else is new???

It is great to be in your company!

You are good at keeping us waiting and expecting without writing a chapter we would like to miss. Great detour, but maybe it is not a detour, maybe with the family as whole as it can be Chase may find more strength and confidence. Unlike Wes above, I'll wait to pass judgement on Hank until I know more. Thank you for another great chapter.

I think Jack's dad really only needs some time. What I do not get is his mother. What can harden a mother so much? I do not envy Jack for having to depend on his parents in his helpless state. Who can make her see sense?

I did not see this at all, but it sounds so convincing and obvious now that you point it out.

There is still so much feeling between Hank and Chase, hard to read. During most of their talk Hank seems almost childish, wilful, and Chase seems much more in charge than ever before. I am wondering what Hank will make of that talk. His standing there motionless implies that Chase has got to him. Interesting that Chase does not recognize that. Great chapter. Again.

I like the extra scenes. I had always wondered how Brian knew about the documents while having no idea about Troy's whereabouts. Grant must have enormous trust in Troy and be really courageous to go through outing himself to himself and to him in just one day and ending up sleeping with him. Great chapter.

Chase seems to be making progress, calling his sister, mentioning his mother, talking about her, then at work making a friend... I guess it must be really hard for somebody like Hank, who was the strong one, the leading one, the one to help and to organize and support, well, it must be a huge step to accept that his former lover, in constant need of support, suffering suddenly appears so independent, so himself... I am not referring to that fateful evening. The rejection must have been worse than icy water after baking in the sun. And even worse then finding Chase kissing a stranger. I would imagine what is really rattling Hank is wondering if Chase has ever been true to him, especially now that he sees him out with others, almost carefree, doing sports, enjoying himself. And totally independent from him. Have they ever been on an equal footing? Yet, I am now wondering what equal here might mean one of them being strong and supportive, the other being in need of support and guidance... In a way I like the idea of the park being a contentious area, like a battle field. Open and yet like home turf. As yet there is no hint as to how you are going to let matters run between C and H. Just hints, tantalizing I call that. Thanks for this chapter!

This is not being kind, just being honest. There was a different kind of suspense waiting for the next development in Morningstar, but Endings is equally gripping, though harder to read when I see how Chase and Hank are torturing themselves and each other without being able to help themselves. Though I am relieved to see that Chase is getting there, slowly. He seems to be making progress. Yet, people in misery can inflict such incredible pain... not always easy to read this is.

Not possible, my friend! I can speak only for myself, but you make waiting for the next installment as hard as it was with Morningstar.

Can't wait, Gary! But I will...

This chapter is great in that what happens leaves so many doors open for the future. But there are several parts hard to stomach, I would not like to be in either of their shoes now. Definitely not.

beautiful, vivid - thank you!