C James

What Harriet didn't get for Christmas by Jfalkon :nuke: :nuke: Spoilers Below!!! :nuke: :nuke:

Awakening by Delzboi :nuke: :nuke: Spoilers Below!!! :nuke: :nuke:

The Parallax effect by Altimexis :nuke: :nuke: Spoilers Below!!! :nuke: :nuke:

Warning, Carl, Graeme is a postaholic, always in search of new forums to post in. Carl, I'll try and keep an eye on your forum if that's all you need. For example, I've had no moderation concerns at all in my own forum, and it is fairly rare that we have problems on GA, so I wouldn't expect much trouble. CJ

As others have said, it depends on which state "the deed" occured in. Also, the fact that it could have been different states gives near automatic reasonable doubt, unless there is some form of proof. (in other words, they could claim there were in one state where it was legal, such as Mississippi) Personally, I've often found some of these laws to be absurd. I'll gladly condemn any adult who goes after minors, BUT, when we're talking two kids in their late teens and very close in age, that's just nuts and no place for the law. In Arizona, it's even crazier. For example, if two seventeen year olds are having sex, that's basically legal. But let's assume one is five days older than the other. If they are in a long-term relationship, the one who turns 18 first can get in real hot water, along with the added prize of lifetime membership in the registered sex offenders club. Worse, there is an exception for both still being in high school, but it's a proactive defense, NOT an automatic out. In other words, they can still be charged, and its then up to the jury to consider the defense. This has occurred to teens just days apart in age when in a long-term relationship. One of the nastier bits of this law is that an ongoing sexual relationship prior to the 18th birthday of the eldest is considered presumptive evidence of said relationship occurring once the eldest turns 18. There have been prosecutions over this. It's rare when they are within a year's age, but it has happened at paren'ts urging, usually whn its the girl who is younger and the parents don't like the guy. I shudder to think was could happen to a gay couple under these circumstances, as the jury might not be so inclined to consider the proactive defenses. Jack, my sincere coldolences on the loss of your mother. BTW, you said you see a story in this somewhere. Well, there is one story that I know of here on GA that had exactly this Arizona law as a major plot point. Been as it's relevant, and I did research the law for it, I'll link it. It's called "For the Love".

Why, Graeme, I'm quite sure that the way I portray the engineer, and the fact you are an engineer, is entirely coincidental. ACK! Can't a poor, quiet, and shy goat get away with anything these days? BTW, in writing news, my short story "Three for Jake" has been approved for the anthology, and so will be in it. (I won't approve/disapprove my own stuff for the anthology, due to obvious conflict of interest, so someone else (I don't know if they want to be named) is very kind and does so for me).

Hrmmm, but wouldn't just about any chapter of any story you liked make you wonder what was going to happen next? ACK!! But Sasha, Why would you say such a thing? You know I (unlike you) never use cliffhangers.

I loved this short story, and given the season, it's very timly to post about it, i think. I loved the wrong assumptions, and the unfounded fears. I won't say more becuase anything I can think of would be a spoiler, but I found this a very enjoyable read. Thanks Carl!

It was somewhat tense, wasn't it? I declare a CLIFFHANGER! Maybe this will help in the discussion. Jan Ahhh, hmmmm... Yes, I think that does help prove my case that I never use cliffhangers! Thanks! Ahhem! # one says EACH ending in suspense. Sl that would be EVERY chapter. With the exception of Shadowgod, does anyone end EVERY chapter in a cliffhanger?

Thanks Graeme! Jon will be developed a bit more. He's tricky to write, becuase of the Instinct members he's the least outgoing in some ways, and he also doesn't have as much screen time. One problem I've had is allotting "screen time" in scenes with many characters. That's trickier than I thought it would be. Thanks Ieshwar! There are minor characters from time to time, like Gabe who played a role in the beginning. Some recur, some don't. And Charity made an impression on me, too. Thanks Sacha! To be honest, without going back and looking, I can't remember if the two girls with Charity were even given names. LoL. For a non-recurring character, I try and avoid naming them if I can. Good point on Jon. He'll get some more development later on. I do that too. If I'm reading it as a periodic serial I have an even larger problem; I don't have a very good memory for names, which doesn't help. Thanks!! The Australian plot is a little confusing regarding names. The narration refers to the engineer, but the dialog usually calls him Vladimir. Then there's Dimitri, so we have two russian names, and then The Scar. The engineer is very much based on many engineers I've known; some have very much that same social inteptidue. I've even heard it called "the engineer's disease" by some people. The gift took me a while to think of. I wanted something that showed their lack of comprehension on the "gay issue", and was funny.

Steve (wildone), thank you so much for this. I really loved it, and I was both flattered and honored that you would do this. Thank you!! And thanks everyone, and a Merry Christmas to you!! CJ

Thanks!! I can answer the bit about who the leader is. Steve is mentioned as both the lead singer and leader of the Shadows in the narration. "No man, you gotta try it. Climbing is such a rush; there's just something about being on a cliff that makes you feel closer to God," declared the leader of The Shadows. I'll answer abotu the stone lower down. Actually, I did have one, though it's not related to the story. There is one unrelated to the plot. Tiger's Eye is the stone for Capricorns, so I thought it might make the Capricans happy. (sorry, Herd, I didn't mean to play favorites.). That link also mentions the birthstone issue, too. And yep, i did research the stone. Cliffhanger? For Christmas?!?!? Ack, i never thought of that... Ok, I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll stand guard on the chapter and try to keep Shadowgod from adding any bits to the end of chapter ninteen. He's evil like that, ya know. Okay, a serious question. I've never tired to follow this many characters in one of my stories before, and the cast is far more crowded than I'm used to. Are y'all having trouble keeping track of who is who? I'm trying to keep things clear, and have distinctive names, but I know I often have trouble keeping the characters straight (Well, you know what I mean) in my head when I'm reading a story with a large cast. Am I doing okay on this? Any suggestions? Thanks!! CJ

The title is a very good fit IMHO... Ack, I thought this was a chapter story for some reason? It could be one. So, Brandon really is dead? I wasn't sure of the wound was lethal or not. In fact, I'm still not, which means, Ieshwar, that you ended the STORY on a cliffhanger! Seriously though, very good! I loved it!

That was a cliffhanger!! And what? Me? A role model? But I never use cliffhangers. Looking forward to Ch 5 <hint, hint!>

The one problem I've found is that true realistic dialog isn't possible to write. Think how people actually talk, all the interruptions, pauses, "ahs", repetitions, body language, etc, and as a reult the best a writer can do is come up with a compromise, or an approximation. I think you did it very well.

True, but Shadowgod can edit posts in his forum. He's evil like that, ya know.

Yes, Eric's leap, especially the part where he realizes he didn't bother to check which end of the pool is the deep end, could have been one of those, uh, vertical rock-face things... But I'd never do such a thing, now would I? I was hoping you'd like the pool party, Conner, I was hoping you would while I was writing it. Don't worry about The Scar, he's just a little serious, but a nice guy at heart. "Commando" usually means "no underwear" at least I think it does, but that's how I meant it. That's why Brandon had to lure Chase into changing. I can't comment on the stone. Ahh, you hit on something I didn't think of; the cotton shorts could be interpreted as underwear. You're right, they aren't, but I should have made that clear. Awww, but Graeme, how could Ch 18 have ended in a cliffhanger? (chapter 18 as posted, that is!) It's not a cliffie in any way? Well, i admit I left a few rather large clues in Ch 18 regarding what comes next, but forshadowing isn't a cliffhanger. Yep, right on both, until Brandon put the speedos on. Brandon and Chase had been rather, um, busy the night before.

I'm sure Eric wouldn't even think of drinking tequila again. The gift idea gave me a good laugh too. There was more than one case of foot in mouth in that chapter. All I can say about Eric's behavior is this; how many teems do crazy things when drunk, and then drink again? Eric seems to enjoy the effect of tequila, as it gives him an excuse to "cut loose". ??? Nah, Eric in FTL was just a sweet, calm, lovable kid... BTW, speaking of tequila... Okay, I'll fess up, I got that trait of Eric's from myself. I don't go that nutz, but I i've done sone crazy stuff in the past. Ummm, also, I hope to have an entry in the coming anthology entitled "Three for Jake." How is that related to tequila? Well, I'd been drinking shots of it at a Christmas party, and I wrote most of the story while drunk... I should really call it "Don't drink and write." :wacko: I can't comment on Wilde, but as for the betas, yes, Shadowgod does get away with a lot, always tryig to sneak cliffhangers into my chapters. But, he's evil like that, ya know. BTW, regarding the typos in this chapter, those are likely due to a major blunder on my part. I sent Emoe the WRONG version for editing. He got the one BEFORE I'd made some post-beta changes, and I did a merge when I got them back. So, no matter what, typos are my responsibility anyway (I'm the one who makes 'em! That's my job! ) but in this case, they likely occurred well after anyone but me worked on the chapter. I've changed my file-handling routine so I hopefully won't make this goof again.

Ouch... Sorry that happened, Steve. Ugh, I don't know what else to say except that a good retort for "the bible says so" is to demand "where". Interestingly, I find that shuts up around half of claimants. "Leviticus" is the usual answer from the rest, and that can open up some great fun when you ask questions about some of Leviticus's more colorful pronouncements, such as it being okay to own slaves, provided they are from neighboring nations. Or that the eaters of shellfish are accursed before god? (God Hates Shrimp!). And what to do about a blind or crippled man who enters a church. If we believe Leviticus, should we stone them to death, or would a simple burning at the stake suffice? (he does call them an abomination, after all). Remember, the only claim they can make regarding literal interpretation is that dietary laws no longer apply (dang, there goes God Hates Shrimp) but little gems like the slavery issue and the blind or crippled being abominations aren't dietary. Those who claim that Leviticus' "moral laws" still apply need to take a close look at those issues. There's also the larger issue of anyone seeking to impose their religious beliefs on others: That's always wrong, and you can always name the most famous person who has that philosophy. a man by the name of Osama Bin Laden. It's also fun to throw in the bit from the new testament where Paul says that if you're circumcised you're Jewish. Exposing the claimant's ignorance of the biblical laws they themselves are referring to is a wonderful opening to suggest that they should pound on the good book a little less, and instead, actually read it on occasion. (If they are going to cite it, it behoves them to at least have a clue what they're talking about). Sorry for rambling, but I live in an area where I get confronted by "biblical claims" a LOT. Grrrr. This probably doesn;t help you with your mother, and I wish I could think of something that would. Best Wishes, CJ

ROFL!!! Actually, Graeme is right; I'm busy catching up with work since I was away, AND also due to being snowed in for a few days last week. Plus of course the holidays, and also the anthology stuff, and trying to get LTMP 21 done. I should be around more later tonight. And yes, I am a lurker! (and thanks for the new quote, Frenchcanadian! )

I'm very short on time right now due to work, so I'll answer the other comments later but I wanted to address these. The two storylines are roughly contemporaneous. In other words they are occurring at roughly the same time, give or take a day. Now, for the explosives, that is an actual truth. Properly made High explosives are extremely safe to handle *IF* there is no detonator attached. The actual detonation requires a high-energy shockwave, so tossing the stuff into a fire is actually quite safe. Someone with expertise in explosives (such as that gunsmith has) would know this, as would Dimitri and The Scar (the Scar is an arms dealer). They were watching for just the reaction you mention; running in panic. That would show he's a phony, and he'd likely have been, ah, shall we say, otherwise employed at a different project had he done so. However, high explosives can degrade over time, becoming unsafe. In the case of dynamite (basically nitroglycerine in clay) the sticks can degrade and "sweat" nitro, and nitroglycerine is unstable AND it can detonate violently. That means it can detonate, with enough energy to set of the dynamite. This is a lesson learned the hard way by more than one miner. Recently, one guy had a crate of dynamite in the back of his pickup truck in the phoenix heat. On his way home, it went kaboom for that reason. There were pieces of the pickup truck for hundreds of yards around, and a crater in the roadway. A sudden and fatal mistake, and if memory serves he got a Darwin award for it. However, plastique compounds are generally far more stable, long-term. I wouldn't throw dynamite on a fire, but plastique should be safe. It will burn, but it shouldn't explode. And yes, shadowgod must be slipping; he didn't add a cliffhanger, even though Eric's leap would have made one. See? Isn't that proof that I never use cliffhangers?

The new chapter is up, just minutes after I sent it to Joe! (thanks Joe!!)

No, there is a title in the chapter, in the usual places. I just can't tell you what it is before the chapter, becuase I promised Shadowgod he could do it, but he's been gone. I think he's working on a cliffhanger. Hrmmm, maybe the chapter title is another of his cliffhangers? He;s left us HANGING over it, hasn't he? So, we had a Shadowgod Cliffhanger with Ch 17 AND 18. BTW, Ch 18 has been sent in.

I just saw the chapter! Sorry for being late. Great chapter! Hrmmm, things are getting interesting for Spike. Maybe Leo is more permanent than Spike is willing to admit? However, Glenn, for some reason, makes me thing things will get complicated between Cray and Michael. BTW, I LOVED the "code talking", that was hilarious, and very realistic.

Well, yes, and if you loose, you will have to surrender your title. BUT IF YOU WIN, FAIR AND SQUARE, you have to accept your title, fair enough? And, umm, I notice that someone shadowy edited my post, thus removing what I'd put there for any inanimate forum readers..