old bob

Hi Kevin, Welcome back. A lot of us missed you, me too . Happy to hear that everything is OK Take care of yourself and good luck

As a non christian European, I didnt understand the meaning of this topic, which seems to be something special for people suffering from psychiatric disorders related to the Christian religion. I searched a translation of the word "rapture" and found : "Ecstasy, bliss, extreme joy; state of being carried away with emotion; belief that at the end of the age both living and dead Christians will be caught up to heaven to be with God (Christianity)" ?????????????? Psychiatric clinics in the United States are apparently not numerous enough and not big enough to hold all these people ?

Life is sometimes hard. Go on to try to contact him. Dont lose hope. The passage of time sometimes helps.

See boxing and martial way You will certainly find an answer to your question .

We have the same problem here in EU. Since a few years our borders are open without control for all the inhabitants of countries members of the European Union, inter alia the roms from Romania. They are rejected in their own country, nobody wants to engage them and their only income come from begging. see : roms from Romania and antiziganism They are now invading the streets and squares of our cities and they "attack" passersby with their requests. As I had the misfortune of giving them too often a bit of money, they recognize me now and I can not get rid of them without becoming nasty. When I remember all the beggars in countries like India, I remember the advices given to the tourists : never begin to give money to one beggar, otherwise all the tribe will be around you within minutes ! Now Switzerland has the same problems like India :wacko:. To give or not to humanitarian organisations by sending a check is an easy decision, but to refuse your help to poor people in front of you is more difficult. So, in my case, even if I know they are "too well organised", I prefer to give "from hand to hand" and to forget the humanitarian organisations

La'chaim to you my friend ! Our glasses should be filled with the best French Champagne, sparkling and breezy....

Too much times with too many people... I sympathise with you and hope you will enjoy your lonliness. But sometimes, be too long alone has also its bad sides. Take your time, "pluck the day", be yourself. I wish you long long days of happiness and contentment .

Happy 48th Birthday Mark ! As we say in French :"mieux vaut tard que jamais" (better late than never), I almost forgot your Birthday.... The brain of old people like me tend to fading, you will see, in 34 years.... My best wishes for an happy life .

Neph, thanks for your nice words . But really, i'm not so special . I had just several chances in my stormy life : to have the strength to never give up, to believe that optimism is a virtue which can be cultivated to live long enough to understand that the mind is able to change many things. BTW, you are a really good writer .

My best wishes for the cure of your father. Tell him that the best way to fight against cancer is a positive attitude and the certitude that the mind can help a lot to cure the body. I remember when the docs told me about my cancer. It was 1996, 15 years ago. A good weapon against it, besides surgery, was a book I had always by my bed, reading it and practising the advices it gave me. Try to give this book to your father, and BTW you can also learn to live a better life by reading it ! "Getting well again", written by Dr. Carl Simonton, Stephanie Mattews Simonton and James Creighton, published in New York. See its site under http://www.simontoncenter.com/. The book is still by my bed and I open it often.

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The reactions to my last blogs about death made ​​me aware that I apparently broke a taboo. So let's go to break it even more. When you reach an advanced age and when the approach of death no longer scare you (yes, I'm afraid of dying, afraid of suffering during the final moments, but death itself does not afraid me). Either there is nothing after the it, and nobody cares because it's the absolute end, or the life of the spirit continues (if you prefer to use other words for it, it's up to you) . If I listen to "specialists" such as Carl Gustav Jung in his latest memoir ("Memories, Dreams, Reflections",New york 1965), I have some reasons to believe that there is an afterlife, as dangerous and tumultuous as life itself, but also with the same joys and the same satisfactions. In my situation and my age, soon (maybe a few years !) near the end of a tempestuous life, I'm confident in the future, and if you want to know more about me, read my former blogs. My purpose is not here to talk about death as such, but about death as a "social fact". The ceremonies which accompany and follow the death are always characterized by a sequence that struck me: the sadness always alternates with other feelings: pride, satisfaction and even pleasure. It is as if we needed to "wash off the grief" and get back to a "normal" life, with alternating laughters and tears. I experimented this sort of feeling very soon and very often Just an example : It was during the winter of 1943 (in the middle of WWII), we had strict restrictions imposed on heating and we endured all the cold in our homes. I attended as a young boy (I was 13) to the cremation of the father of one of my friends. It was very cold in the crematorium. When the door of the furnace opened, someone in the audience said, "what chance he has, he at least will be warm". Unfortunately the person who spoke was deaf and she said these words out loud without realizing it. Everyone heard and everyone laughed. What a joyous ceremony! Another example : It was summer 1955, during one of my periods of military service. I was on call with my platoon and we had been called as a guard of honor for the funeral of a fighter pilot fallen during a reconnaissance flight. When the coffin is lowered into the grave, the honor guard fires a salute, guns raised to the sky in tribute to the dead. It's a very emotional moment. At first, the music band plays the funeral march and in the end, they leave at the sound of a rousing military march, followed by the detachment of honor. Like all participants, I was very moved. We then gathered in a banquet in honor of the Air Force.Like all others,we toasted many times to the health of our friends pilots died for our country. At the end of the meal, we were all imbibed under the tables, all grief forgotten. What a great banquet ! And another one : One of my co-workers comes from a mountainous region, inhabited by farmers and shepherds who have a hard life but who love to eat and to empty good bottles with friends. Funerals are often a pretext for meals that last until the first hours of the next morning. I dont remember the exact day, but what I remember very well was the crowd of old people, friends or parents of the dead and particularly the large dining room, filled with this huge crowd of people I didnt know. A few hours later, I didn't even remember the name of the dead which we celebrated the funeral, but I had a lot of new friends and above all the memory of a wonderful meal, with all the jokes I heard about the dead and his friends.What a deep friendship ! Life is funny, isnt'it ?

Mike, you know you can count on my support. Dont hesitate to call when needed . BTW, I'm more than 13 years older than you. I'm sure I will be the first of us two to leave .

It's strange how the feeling of the approach of my own death, coming from the last events about my cancer, gave me a feeling of contentment and satisfaction. I felt relieved to know where I am. In six months, the next check up will tell me if I'm still in remission or if I should undertake a series of long-term treatments. My docs told me that this could take many years, with the current advances in medicine. At worst, I still have at least 10 years before me, unless an accident (heart attack or car accident) does not come prematurely change my destiny. 10 years, this means that I would reach a ripe old age of 92 years ! God knows what may yet happen in 10 years. I just hope I'll always have my head on my shoulders, with all my mental faculties, even if I may be walking with crutches. Anyway, I must put some order in my business. I'm still active, but my family should know what to do if I become incapable of understanding or if I disappear. Since a few days, I began to classify all my files, to write specific instructions, to prepare a variety of documents to be signed by my wife and my sons. I only regret not having started earlier this work. What a pleasure to be in order, to know that everything is planned for my departure. Preparing for the future is also an opportunity to take stock of my past, to remember all the circonstances which led me to where I am, the head of an happy family, enjoying my life day by day, without fear of future. Life has been good to me. I went through all the difficulties of the past with optimism and I was right. In conclusion, despite my mistakes, I never succumbed to despair and I was rewarded. Even the deaths of two of my children and the difficult times I experienced then never did me make to lose my courage. Young for ever is still my motto, for today and for all the happy years to come. Live is not "to wait to the next death". It is to pluck the day.... and it's what I really intend to do, with friends, with family, also walking alone in a crowd of unknown people, trying to guess how many gays are around me, giving hope to the wetchs though my smiles and enjoying the weather (even if it rains !) the nature and the nice small streets of my home town. What I also enjoy, is making bills for my advices to my small tribe of old clients . I dont despise the money and the pleasures it brings by spending it, for me and for others. (I edited the last phrases as an answer to Marzipan's comment)

As I said in my profile : " young for ever". But the answer this question is not so easy ! a first answer could be for me : at the birth of my first son, I was 23. a second answer could be when I built my first company, I was 36. a third answer could be when I lost my parents. I was 40 at my father's death and 54 at my mother's death. a forth answer could be when I got my first cancer, I was 67. a fifth answer could be when I lost my daughter, I was 74. But the real answer is : when I lost my eldest son, I was 79 .

Once more, I have to say that I admire James. His style and the way he writes, short, direct, with just the minimal number of words, are awesome and impressive . BTW, IMO he is 100 % right.

Interesting ! We in Europa make apparently the same error about USA as Tocqueville did. You wrote : For us, a democratic nation is ruled by the people (voters for laws, elected authorities for decisions) not by consensus but by majority of votes. The system works, for instance in Switzerland since 8 centuries ! We had our civil wars, about two times, but it was for religious reasons). IMO, your reasoning is perhaps valid for your country, but certainly not for the majority of the other democracies (excepted the "popular democracies" !). BTW, it seems that a lot of Europeans made the same mistake as Tocqueville. It's very difficult for us to understand the deep feelings of the US citizens.

Welcome . To be quite honest, I suppose that you are at least bi , which means that you could imagine having an "affair" with another guy . Or am I wrong ? Old Bob (see my profile !), expecting your story with great interest.

I have some difficulties to understand the difference between "republicanism" and "democracy". To resolve my problem I went to one of the best writer of the beginning of USA : Alexis de Tocqueville, in his work "Democracy in America" (1851).I found this in Wiki about his work : "Tocqueville's penetrating analysis sought to understand the peculiar nature of American political life. In describing America, he agreed with thinkers such as Aristotle and Montesquieu that the balance of property determined the balance of political power, but his conclusions after that differed radically from those of his predecessors. Tocqueville tried to understand why America was so different from Europe in the last throes of aristocracy. America, in contrast to the aristocratic ethic, was a society where hard work and money-making was the dominant ethic, where the common man enjoyed a level of dignity which was unprecedented, where commoners never deferred to elites, and where what he described as crass individualism and market capitalism had taken root to an extraordinary degree." and : "This rapidly democratizing society, as Tocqueville understood it, had a population devoted to "middling" values which wanted to amass, through hard work, vast fortunes. In Tocqueville's mind, this explained why America was so different from Europe. In Europe, he claimed, nobody cared about making money. The lower classes had no hope of gaining more than minimal wealth, while the upper classes found it crass, vulgar, and unbecoming of their sort to care about something as unseemly as money; many were virtually guaranteed wealth and took it for granted. At the same time in America workers would see people fashioned in exquisite attire and merely proclaim that through hard work they too would soon possess the fortune necessary to enjoy such luxuries. But, despite maintaining with Aristotle, Montesquieu, and others that the balance of property determined the balance of power, Tocqueville argued that, as America showed, equitable property holdings did not ensure the rule of the best men. In fact, it did quite the opposite. The widespread, relatively equitable property ownership which distinguished America and determined its mores and values also explained why the American masses held elites in such contempt. More than just imploding any traces of old-world aristocracy, ordinary Americans also refused to defer to those possessing, as Tocqueville put it, superior talent and intelligence. These natural elites, who Tocqueville asserted were the lone virtuous members of American society, could not enjoy much share in the political sphere as a result. Ordinary Americans enjoyed too much power, claimed too great a voice in the public sphere, to defer to intellectual superiors. This culture promoted a relatively pronounced equality, Tocqueville argued, but the same mores and opinions that ensured such equality also promoted, as he put it, a middling mediocrity. Those who possessed true virtue and talent would be left with limited choices. Those with the most education and intelligence would either, Tocqueville prognosticated, join limited intellectual circles to explore the weighty and complex problems facing society which have today become the academic or contemplative realms, or use their superior talents to take advantage of America's growing obsession with money-making and amass vast fortunes in the private sector. Uniquely positioned at a crossroads in American History, Tocqueville's Democracy in America attempted to capture the essence of American culture and values." I dont see here any difference between "republicanism" and "democracy". Republicanism without democracy is dictatorship. I'm sure it's not what you want for your country .

go to language of flowers I found this in Wiki. The only other day I know is St Valentin's day.

what two wnderful songs . I should try to find such songs in my mothertongue, French..... I found one, here the translation in English : Malchik gay - Malchik gay Malchik - Malchik Handsome - Tender - Soft Why do you look right through me thinking "No" I can't deny my feelings Growing strong I try to keep believing dreaming on And every time I see you I crave more I wanna pull you closer closer - closer - closer but you leave me feeling frozen Malchik gay - Malchik gay I can be all you need Won't you please stay with me Malchik gay - Malchik gay Apologies, might-have-been's Malchik gay - Malchik gay can't erase what I feel Malchik gay gay - Malchik gay Malchik gay - Malchik gay Malchik - Malchik Choking - Back emotion I try to keep on hoping for a way; a reason for us both to come in close I long for you to hold me like your boyfriend ... does and though my dream is slowly fading I wanna be the object object - object - object of your passion, but it's hopeless Malchik gay - Malchik gay I can be all you need Won't you please stay with me Malchik gay - Malchik gay Apologies, might-have-been's Malchik gay - Malchik gay can't erase what I feel Malchik gay gay- Malchik gay Malchik gay - Malchik gay I can be all you need Won't you please stay with me Malchik gay - Malchik gay Apologies, might-have-been's Malchik gay - Malchik gay can't erase what I feel Malchik gay gay - Malchik gay and another one, by the Pet Shop Boys (2001) : I was backstage Couldn't believe my luck was in I saw him approach wearing the most approachable grin When he said "Hello" I was surprised He spoke so politely I said I'd liked the show Well, he just smiled I guess it happens nightly and so I fell in love We went to his room He had a video camera I was so nervous I had to try hard not to stammer vHe said "I'm glad you liked the show. That crowd was dope out there tonight" "Alright" "You wanna see some more? Well, be my guest You can have a private performance. I'd fallen in love" I didn't ask why though he seemed like such a regular guy He said we could be secret lovers just him and me then he joked, "Hey man you're name isn't Stan, is it? We should be together" And he was passionate I guess I would rate him a nine out of ten I'd fallen in love When I've asked why have I heard I so much about him being charged with homophobia and stuff he just shrugged Next morning we woke (secret lovers) He couldn't have been a nicer bloke All the breakfast made jokes about Dre and his homies and folks Neither of us asked if or when we would see each other again But I thought that was cool 'cause I was allready late for school By then I'd fallen in love

Traditionally, lily of the valley is sold in the streets of France and Switzerland on May 1. Usually you offer your partner, boyfriend or gilrfriend a sprig of lily to express your love. In the "language of flowers", the lily of the valley signifies the return of happiness. It's what I wish to all of you, in this wonderful evening of a sunny Sunday. Legend tells of the affection of a lily of the valley for a nightingale that did not come back to the woods until the flower bloomed in May. What a nice legend

See my comment of today in your blog "unrequited". My opinion about you is still valid .

"Make it easier ?" Bittersweetness is something you will enjoy when you get older. To remember bad experiences ist often very positive, much better than the experience itself

I like your answer very much . You are a wise man, despite your age . I wish you to keep your wisdom "alive" in the course of all your life. To be optimist and dreamer is a real gift which will make you happy (believe me, I'm the same and it helped me a lot, day by day).