Not A Kiss - 3. Chapter 3

The days that followed were uneventful. There were no repeats of the dream, thankfully, but maybe that’s because Joey’s memories already bugged me during the day every chance it gets. That’s when I decided that maybe it’s time for me to move on. I still have feelings for Joey, that’s for sure, but it’s been five years already. Of course all these are just words, actually doing it would take much effort. But I can do it, I think.

I kept myself busy by preparing for college. I am going to attend a state college together with my best friend Sam, the same college that Lee and his best friend Liam are attending. Sam was accepted at both Harvard and Yale but turned them both down. I’m not sure who was more disappointed at her decision, the universities or her parents but she just shrugged and smiled when I asked her about it. Sam stated that she’d be able to concentrate on her studies more when she’s around people she loves. Also, she can still go to either Harvard or Yale if things don’t work out.

Sam visited me at home. I was bored to death before she arrived. She looked amazing as usual. She just grew out of being a tomboy one day and started acting like a “lady” back in high school. I could not understand the transformation but I liked it. It’s all a facade anyway, deep down she’s still tough.

“Hey, Sam! I’m glad you came. I think I was about to commit suicide before you arrived.”

“I’m glad I came just in time then. I didn’t want to ruin my new shoes just in case there’s blood all over the floor. You like my shoes?” She asked without any tell tale sign of whether she was joking or not. I just shrugged.

“Oh come on! Sometimes I’m not sure what’s the use of having a gay best friend if we can’t talk about shoes.”

“Well, Samantha. I’m not sure whether you noticed but I’m not exactly a practicing gay.” I said pretending to be hurt.

“It’s your fault, not mine. I can hook you up if you want to. I know exactly your type.” She said giggling.

“And what exactly is my type?”

“You sure you want me to answer that? Last time I checked, we’re not talking about that.”

I looked at her saying nothing. She looked back at me. There was guilt and sadness in her gray eyes which surprisingly made her more beautiful. I let my eyes roam all over her face. There was a tinge of red on her cheeks which I decided was not make up. Her full luscious red lips were drawn together. In spite of my sexuality, I caught my breathe.

“Stop staring, Daniel. If I didn’t know better, I think you’re checking me out.” She said, her blush more pronounced now.

“I’m sorry, it’s just that you’re so beautiful and beauty is my one weakness. Why don’t you have a boyfriend again?” I asked to distract her.

I succeeded. I can tell you exactly what her answer was without even listening to her because I’ve asked her the same question for as long as I can remember. First, she’d say that she just haven’t got the time. Her studies come first. And what about the activities in school? She can’t possibly leave me all alone. What if her boyfriend hates me? And things like that. If you ask me, I think she’s just scared. She doesn’t like change that much no matter how much she tries to hide it.

“So are you excited about college?” She asked, she sat down on the sofa beside me. I wrapped my left arm around her and she snuggled close to me. I gave her head a kiss.

“When have I ever been as excited as you to go back to school?”

“But you’re majoring in English Lit. You must be at least a little psyched. It’s your favorite subject.”

“I am, a bit. I hope we can have some subjects together. We’ve always been together after all.” I said. I was lightly caressing Sam’s shoulders while we talked but I felt her shudder a bit.

“What’s wrong? Are you cold?” I asked.

“I’m fine. It’s nothing. If it was up to me, I’d take the same course as you. But you know that English is not my cup of tea. I’m a math geek, remember? That’s why I’m taking Engineering.” She snuggled closer to me. Her sweet scent immediately filled my senses and made me light headed. If only I was not gay...

“Are you even listening to me Daniel?”

“Of course I am.” I lied.

“Sure you are.” She said with sarcasm as she straightened herself to look at me. “So as I was saying, what time will you be going tomorrow? You’re going to your dorm to get settled in, right?”

“Yeah, I’m going, Mom.” I said playfully. “Lee is going to drop me off then help me with my stuff. There’s not much. The dorm is only 30 minutes from here after all. Actually, I don’t really know how Lee talked me into it. It seemed like a good idea at the time but I’m not so sure now. I’d rather stay at home like you.”

“Well I think it’s a great idea. What if your roommate is gay?”

“You and Lee both leave my love life alone. I’ve just decided to jump start my love life and you’re both already on my case. Let me handle it, ok?” I pleaded.

“Fine, but in case your search leads to a blank wall, just tell me ok? I know a lot of guys.”

“SAMANTHA!”

That ended Sam’s visit.

********************

The next day, Lee and I were loading a few boxes on the trunk of his car and the backseat. There weren’t much as I predicted. Just some clothes, books, my laptop, my old guitar and other essential things. When we’ve finished, I went to the passenger seat and Lee took the driver seat.

“Where’s your boyfriend?” I teased.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” There was a definite edge in Lee’s voice when he said it.

“I was referring to Liam and being silly. Just chill, ok?”

“Sorry, I didn’t get much sleep.”

“No prob. When you see him, tell him I might hang out with him one of these days, ok? That is if he’s not ashamed of hanging out with a freshman and more importantly, if his gay bashing days are over.” I said trying to sound casual.

“He’s not that kind of person. He’ll love to hang out with you.” I couldn’t place Lee’s expression as he said this. I wanted to ask him what’s wrong but decided against it. He’s not in his best mood after all.

A few minutes later, we were at the dorm. I decided to carry two boxes with me. Not to be outdone, Lee decided to carry three. His arm muscles bulged as we went towards my room. I didn’t know where it was but as Lee was staying in the same dorm, he led the way. Lee was quite popular in the dorm, no surprises there. He seemed to know everyone. Some guys were definitely checking him out but he didn’t seem to notice, I did, however.

My room is on the second floor, room 215. After exiting the elevator, Lee went left and a few steps after, he laid down the boxes he was carrying.

“Here we are, go on open the door already.”

I did as I was told. When I opened the door, my roommate was already there. He had his back at me but turned around when he heard the door open. Good thing I still had a hold of the door and had it for support. Otherwise, I would have sunk on my knees.

“Hi.” I said awkwardly as I gazed at the bluest of blue eyes. I literally felt like I was in the ocean and I was drowning fast.

“Hi, you must be my roommate. I’m Ced, short for Cedric.” He said smiling, showing perfect white teeth which only added to my infatuation.

I was in the presence of the perfect male specimen and all I could do was stare. I was jerked back into reality when I heard Lee clear his throat.

“Oh, yes. I am Dan short for Daniel. And this is my brother Lee, short for well, Lee.” Did I just say that? I’m a moron!

“Excuse my brother, he has an awful sense of humor.” Lee said without any effort in hiding the note of embarrassment in his voice.

They shook hands while I felt disgusted at myself.

“Don’t worry buddy,” Cedric turned to me, “I think you’re hilarious.” And he gave me a wink.

I blushed, good thing Cedric didn’t notice as he was kindly offering his help then to Lee in bringing my boxes inside.

“I’ll leave you two alone.” Lee said after making sure that I had everything I need.

“Thanks, Lee.”

Cedric went with Lee to the door. I was opening boxes.

“Interesting” I heard Cedric mutter.

I fixed my gaze on him. “What’s interesting?” I asked.

“Oh, nothing. I just remembered something. You don’t mind that I chose this side, do you?”

“This side is fine.” I said. “What are you doing?” I asked when I saw him starting to undress.

“You don’t mind, do you buddy? I’m more comfortable in my undies. Actually, I’m more comfortable naked but I think you’ll definitely object to that. You can shed your clothes too if you want.”

This guy just oozed sex appeal. Everything about him is perfect. He’s not as muscular as Lee but still pretty damn sexy. There were patches of blonde hair on his chest and legs which were almost invisible against his flawless white skin. The same blonde hair adorned his head. His hair just seemed to flow probably the reason he kept it longish. I bet it feels soft to the touch.

He kept the conversation going. In spite of my infatuation or maybe because of it, I found myself listening to his stories about himself. I found out that his family consist of him, his Dad and an older brother.

“It’s just me and my Dad now. My brother and his partner moved to another state.” He concluded.

“Your brother’s married? How nice. How many nephews or nieces do you have?” I asked.

“My brother’s not married. He’s still waiting for gay marriage to be legalized in their state. But I think he and his partner, plans to adopt soon so I’m excited about that.”

I wonder if this is the part where I say I’m gay too.

“Anyway,” Cedric continued after a while, “my Dad’s bisexual. I’m not sure why I’m telling you all these. It’s just so easy to talk to you. What are you majoring in by the way?”

“English Literature.” I answered.

“No way, me too. What do you say to getting the same subjects? That way, we’ll both have someone to talk to in case the professor’s boring.” He said as he turned to lay on his back revealing his bubble butt.

The prospect of having someone I know in class made me accept his offer. I was pulling things from boxes and putting them in drawers, cabinets, tables and such while we were talking. Now that I’m finished, I looked at this amazing guy lying on the bed next to me. He was not much taller than me, probably 6’1” whereas I’m 6 flat. He was still, probably dozed off, with his head turned away from me. I was therefore enjoying myself looking at him when he suddenly turned and caught me staring at him. He didn’t seem to mind though, in fact he was smiling.

I turned and pretended to be busy with something. There were two things on my mind. First, I’m in big trouble as I have to spend much time with this guy. Second, I wonder if he’s gay. His father is bisexual and his brother is gay after all, not that that means anything.

After a while, I changed my second thought. I hope he’s gay.