The Game - 21. Chapter 21

Neither Lily nor Shaun slept much that night. They were both up early and breakfast was ready by seven. Neither of them wanted to be the one to go and wake Daniel.... for all kinds of reasons. They had talked late into the night about whether they should keep the appointment and had still not found a definitive answer.

In the end it was Daniel who provided them with their answer. He came downstairs at seven thirty, looking calm, confident and totally unlike the Daniel they had come to know. He went straight to the kettle and made himself a coffee, tipping the coffee direct from the jar into the mug without bothering to use a spoon to produce a thick brown soup that he drank with obvious enjoyment.

“How the hell can you drink that?”

“What?”

“That’s not a coffee.... that is a cup of pure caffeine.”

“Hmm... that is kind of the point.”

He had his head tilted to one side, his hair falling over his face, his eyes fixed on Shaun who began to look distinctly uncomfortable.

“How are you feeling this morning?”

“Fine. Ready for anything.”

“Really?”

“Oh yeah. It’s going to be quite a day.”

“Daniel.... we’ve been thinking.....” It was the first words Shaun had said to him and he smiled, lifting his head.

“I know. Don’t worry. It’ll be fine. You have to take me... but.... it will be alright.”

“Daniel... we know.... we know what they did to you there.... what they have been doing to you all along.”

“Yeah... I know you do. So do I.”

“And we know what will happen if you go back there today.”

“No... no you don’t. You think you do and you think that you can save me from it but, although I appreciate the thought... you can’t and, what’s more, I don’t want you to.”

“Daniel....”

“No. Don’t.... It’s okay. I want you take me. I want you to take me and stay with me and see what happens.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’ve never been more sure about anything. It’s important. Not only that, but you have to give me the drugs... because if you don’t he will know.”

“I... don’t.... I don’t think I can.”

“Oh, I know you can. I’m counting on it.”

“I.... I have... I....”

“Ah, come on Shaun.... you’re a professional, remember? Professionalism is everything... right?”

“Daniel....”

“Hey... it’s my life... my body... my mind. Just do it.”

“I....”

“You know.... I could probably do it myself... but I would be very likely to fuck it up, I’ve never done it before after all and I’m a bit clumsy. I don’t think I would like it very much..... my arms hurt enough as it is.”

“Please stop this. I don’t know what game you’re playing but....”

“Yes you do... you know exactly what game I’m playing..... only I’m playing another one at the same time.... one that you don’t know about... and that’s the one I have to win.”

“I don’t understand.”

“No.... you don’t. I wouldn’t expect you to... but it’s the whole reason I’m here... so, I hope you don’t mind but I have no intention of telling you about it because it might all go wrong and, if it does... you really don’t want to be caught in the crossfire. Just play your part and you’ll be safe and it will all be.... okay.”

“What the hell are you involved in?”

“I told you... I’m playing a game... until now I have been doing it very reluctantly, in fact I wasn’t actually playing it at all... I was actively resisting playing... but now... now I’m playing to win. So you have no need to worry about me. Just do what you have to do and I will do what I have to do... and we all just have to hope that it will all work out in the end.”

“Are you really sure?”

“Yes. I am... really sure.”

“Do you want any breakfast Daniel?”

“No. I have a feeling that later I will be feeling kind of sick so I would prefer not to have anything to be sick with.”

“Ah... fuck Daniel... how can you be so.... so...”

“Do you think I am? I’m not.”

“I’ll get the stuff.”

When they were alone Daniel leaned across the table and took Shaun’s hand. His first instinct was to pull it away but he didn’t. When he looked up Daniel’s eyes were cool but intense.

“It won’t always be like this. “ He smiled a slow sexy smile that made Shaun shiver to the depths of his soul which screamed at him to lean forward, just a little, just enough.... Instead he jerked back, pulling his hand away.

“No... no it won’t.” He got up and stood over the sink... staring out of the window. He could feel Daniel’s eyes burning a hole in his back and he was surprised to realise just how much his hands were shaking. Fuck Fuck Fuck... what was that boy doing to him?

“Why are you so different? It's more than just because you’ve missed a couple of doses of your meds? Who are you?”

“Yes, it is more than that, much more. I have found myself Shaun and I’m not who you think I am, not who I thought I was.”

“I can see that.”

“Why ....?” Daniel sighed. There was no point finishing.... Shaun knew exactly what he was thinking, what he was going to say.

“Because it would be too dangerous Daniel.”

“For whom?”

“It just isn’t right.”

“For whom?”

“Daniel... please....don’t.”

“Shaun. You don’t understand, not yet. You will... soon. Nothing is as it seems... well, almost nothing. There is one thing that is clear.” Shaun looked up to ask what that might be. He didn’t bother, it was there in Daniel’s eyes. He had to look away.

“Don’t do this. You don’t know what you’re doing?”

“Do you really believe that? Do you think for one minute that I don’t know exactly what you are feeling right now and do you think I’m not feeling it too? In a different time, a different place this conversation would never even have taken place, we would already have been.... closer. You can’t deny how you feel and neither can I... you can only seek to turn away from it, to make it into something it’s not. It’s not complicated, Shaun, it’s not wrong, it’s not twisted and it certainly isn’t taking advantage of me, if anything it’s the other way around.”

Shaun turned, his lips parted to speak but when he saw the look on Daniel’s face, the expression in his eyes, he couldn’t. There was nothing to say.

He didn’t know if he was glad or sorry when Lily returned. He knew that he was sorry that he had to take the case off her, sorry he had to open it, sorry he had to take the cap off a new needle, sorry he had to pick up the bottle with clumsy fingers. He looked up and met Daniel’s eyes, they were steady and calm. He smiled and it wasn’t a dangerous smile, it was a sweet one, an encouraging one.

“Don’t even think about short measures this morning. In fact you should put a little extra.”

“What? Why?”

“Because, if he checks he will know that I haven’t had what I should have had because there won’t be enough of it in my system.”

“But... if I do that then you....”

“Won’t be any worse off in the long run.”

“It doesn’t work that way.”

“You’re the expert.”

When he had drawn up the injection Shaun crouched next to Daniel and hesitated. He was startled when Daniel reached out and stroked the hair out of his face, cupping his chin in his fingers. They were surprisingly strong and steady. He raised his head, unresisting and looked into those eyes. Instantly his stomach tightened, his heartbeat quickened, his throat constricted. He had never felt this way before, not for anyone, ever. Why did it have to be here, now, like this, with....

“Daniel.....”

“It’s alright Shaun... it’s going to be alright.”

For a moment Shaun stared into the wide green eyes and felt that he was falling then he jerked away from the touch and bent his head to his task which he completed quickly, before he had a chance to think. Despite himself Daniel gasped and when Shaun looked up he had his eyes closed, his face creased with pain.

“Did I hurt you?”

“Some... it’s alright... my arms are a mess you couldn’t have not hurt me.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be... you tried your best... that’s all I could have hoped for.” Again Daniel’s smile drew him in and made him feel as though his eyes were pulling him out of his body to fall endlessly into their depths and he jerked away. “We should get going...while I can still walk.”

“Sometimes you can be a real bastard, do you know that?”

“Yeah, I know that... I work at it. Don’t worry.”

“Are you absolutely sure about this Daniel? You don’t have to go. We talked about it and we made the decision that we were not going to take you.”

“I’m absolutely sure.”

“Can you tell us why?”

“Not yet. You have to trust me Shaun. You have to believe that this is the right way, that it will all be alright in the end.” He leaned his head back against the wall and sighed. He was shivering.

“Come on then, let’s get this over with.”

It really was quite remarkable how Daniel managed to keep any focus at all. The drug, settling like a blanket over his mind spun him so far away from himself that it was difficult to keep hold of any form of reality. Fortunately, as a strong psychic who had received extensive training in meditation and astral projection, he was used to slipping through into alternate realities and, in his he was clear and able to keep his eye on the goal, gently manipulating the energies, calling those he needed to execute his plan.

He could feel them coming. Even as he stumbled from the car smiling at Lily with eyes that looked right through her, he was feeling them all drawing closer and knew it was all as it should be.