The Game - 23. Chapter 23

In all of his life Ben had never felt so helpless and out of control. He had always worked in occupations that made damn sure that he was right there on the button, in control, on the offensive. In many ways he had been in his element in the army. He had risen fast and been marked as a special forces natural very early on.

The only thing that had caused him any trouble was the things he had to see, the things he had to do, that were ... in his personal opinion... immoral and unethical. These ‘things’ had increased in number and degree the deeper he went into the world of special ops. Still he had held on for ten years... mainly because of the fact that it made his life clear and uncomplicated.

He had no problem risking his life, risking his job, risking his sanity.... what he had trouble with was compromising himself, the things that gave his life meaning, his integrity, his morality. And this was why he had watched the sun rise from the wrong side of a bottle of bourbon and he was now stalking restlessly around his living room fighting old demons.

He knew full well that his career in nursing was over. Yet again something that he had come to with the very best of intentions had turned out to have a stinking underbelly that turned his stomach and made him sick.

There was something about that kid, something that had got right under his skin. Initially it had made him angry, because he could see the inevitable coming. He had known almost from the beginning that there was something very wrong with the whole situation. The growing suspicion had now been confirmed and he knew beyond doubt that the boy was in trouble so deep that there was no way he was going to get out of it alive.

For some reason the Professor, a man he had grown to respect, who had taken him under his wing and persuaded him to start formal training as a nurse, who had seemed the epitome of morality and integrity, had descended into the murky realms of brainwashing and highly illegal methods of mind control. Why? Who was in control of him? Who was pulling his strings, leading him down a path of dangerously immoral activity? Why was he following them? Why was he allowing himself to be used in this way?

What had that kid done to deserve this? What did he know? What had he seen? What were they trying to keep him from remembering? What could be so important that they were prepared to ruin a young life, to risk destroying his mind, and body? Who were the people who were controlling this, because he was sure there was something sinister going on, someone behind the scenes pulling strings.

Questions whirled in his head, spinning in circles, leading him down blind allies and exploding in the back of his mind, in a place that had been closed for five years.

One thing was clear as crystal. He would find no answers pacing his living room. And he could not live with the pictures in his head... the wide green eyes that seemed to hint at a keen and lively mind, filled with fear and confusion.... that kid didn’t deserve that, and he needed to know why. He needed answers, he had always needed answers, and there was only one way that he was going to get them.

Checking the clock he could see that it was just after nine. They would be at the hospital now, all of them... unless Shaun and Lily had taken things into their own hands. Well, he would have to risk that.