Our Christmas Cookbook - 25. Meat Meets Veg

Meat Meets Veg

By Valkyrie, Cole Matthews, and Aditus

 

“We should get an apartment together next year,” Taylor stated.

Lucas stared at them and lowered his iPad. “What about Alex? And Ava?”

Taylor shrugged. “Alex too. Ava won’t care. She’s got a new boyfriend, and I think they might be moving in together anyway.”

“Oh. Well, yeah. Sure. Let me talk to Alex, and I’ll let you know.”

Taylor frowned. “If you don’t want to, just tell me.”

Lucas sighed. “Tayley… you know me better than that. I think it would be great to get an apartment together. But I don’t want to leave Alex out, either.”

“What about David.” Taylor waggled their eyebrows.

“What about him?”

“Oh don’t go all innocent on me. You know what I mean.”

“We’re nowhere near the ‘moving in together’ stage. So why do you want an apartment? Why not the dorms?”

“Dorm rooms don’t have kitchens. And I want a nice, huge kitchen to cook in.” Taylor bounced as they stirred the pot on the stove. “Like this one. Your parents’ house is amazing. Nothing like mine.”

Lucas had invited Taylor to spend Christmas break at his house, after learning his friend had nowhere to go.

Lucas grinned. “Ah! Now it makes sense! You want a kitchen so you can cook for Michael.” He batted his eyes and made a kissy face.

“How can I cook for someone on another continent?” Taylor tried unsuccessfully to stifle a smile.

“You take pics of food all the time and send them to him. Hell, you should go to culinary school, with the way you’ve been carrying on. Or does all that have to do with Michael?”

“I’ve always liked cooking.” Taylor pouted. “I’m not sure I want to make it my career, though.”

“Yeah, well you like it even more since you found that blog.”

“Nothing wrong with having interests. There’s a world outside Marvel, you know,” Taylor said.

Lucas almost dropped his iPad from laughing so hard. “Oh that’s good, coming from you!” He stared at Taylor’s shirt. “When was the last time you wore something not related to the Avengers? Or Deadpool?”

Taylor glanced down. “Uh… yesterday?”

Lucas shook his head. “Nope. You wore your Hulk shirt.”

“Oh. Well, who cares, anyway?”

“So… does Michael like Marvel?”

“How would I know? And stop saying his name like that.”

“Oh, you mean the same way you say David’s?”

Taylor laughed. “Fair point. OK, truce. And he likes Star Wars. Which, while cool, is not as cool as Marvel.”

Lucas laughed. “Agreed. That soup smells really good, by the way.”

“Thanks. Michael sent me the link. It’s a copycat recipe of zuppa Toscana.”

Taylor’s laptop dinged, indicating a message. They grinned and skipped to the breakfast bar. “Hey Lukey, stir the soup, would ya?”

“Aye aye, commandant!” Lucas mock saluted them, but his friend only had eyes for their computer.

Taylor clicked on the private message icon on their favorite blog, “Meat Meets Veg”. It was run by a woman who was a vegetarian married to a meat eater. She featured recipes that could be made either vegetarian or with meat, so she didn’t need to make two separate meals every night. There was an active chat room as part of the blog, and that’s where they met Michael.

They tended to comment on the same recipes and quickly developed a friendship. Taylor looked forward to their daily messages. Although Taylor realized online and real-life chemistry could be two very different things, they somehow sensed Michael was different. Even though he lived in Germany, Taylor wanted nothing more than to meet their new friend.

Taylor read Michael’s message and pumped their fist. “Yes!” They turned to Lucas. “Michael wants to Skype!”

“Yeah? That’s awesome!”

“Well, it’s part of a site event. ‘Cooking for Christmas’. A bunch of site members all Skype together as we make our meals.”

“Sounds… interesting.”

“Well it is to me. Looks like Jonah and Cole want to join in too.”

Lucas nodded as he stirred Taylor’s soup. “Cool.” While not a part of the site, Lucas had heard enough about the other members to feel like he knew them as well as his friend did.

“Do you think your mom would mind if I used her kitchen so I could participate?”

“I don’t see why not. I’ll text her, but I can’t see her saying no.” Lucas fished out his phone and typed a text to his mom. She quickly responded, giving Taylor permission to participate.

Taylor rapidly typed a response to Michael.

Count me in!

****

“What are you looking at so intently?” Taran asked, looking up from his book. There was a small crackling blaze burning in the small, brown brick fireplace. Along the wall, adjacent, was a Frazier fir tree, bedazzling with white lights and reflecting ornaments of every color. The room was redolent with the scent of evergreen overlaid with the aroma of freshly baked sweet bread wafting in from the small kitchen. Cole was hunkered over a laptop, oblivious to the scene around him.

“I’m looking at some recipes,” he answered. “There’s a great one for soup, a Zuppa Toscana that looks delicious.”

“Sounds nice,” Taran said, setting his book down. He picked up a freshly baked pastry, a sweet man that was plump and bursting with fruit, glazed with lemony frosting, and decorated with rich, salty nuts. “Your sister and her husband are bringing something over? Would this go with it?” he asked.

Cole smiled over at his boyfriend. “Yeah, Delia is bringing a pasta dish with scallops on the side, so I thought the soup would work because I can make it without meat.”

Taran picked up his coffee mug and paused. “Why make it without meat?”

“Tom, Delia’s husband, is vegetarian.”

Taran nodded. “I forgot about that. Is that why you’re looking for a recipe?”

“Yeah,” Cole said, clicking the mouse again. “There’s this blog called Meat Meets Veg, and they have base recipes where you can add meat or not. It’s pretty well organized.”

“Did you find that soup on there?”

“Yeah,” Cole answered. “I think this might work.”

Taran sipped his hot beverage, enjoying the ambience of the setting. The warmth of the room, the smells, and the company of his dear sweet boyfriend were all so comforting. It seemed this holiday would be everything it should be.

“Oh. My. God.”

Taran looked over at Cole leaning closely to the computer screen. “Someone named Taylor just posted a homemade garlic clove focaccia recipe. It’s got fresh grated Romano cheese and fried sage. That would go perfect with the pasta dish.”

“Sounds good,” Taran said. “How do you know if any of these recipes are actually any good?”

“Lots of them have pictures. For example, the bread is so warm you can almost see the steam rising off it.”

****

Ren pushed the entrance door closed, holding the shopping bags out for Sox so he could sniff them. “Jonah!”

“Kitchen!”

Followed by their tail-wagging walking carpet, he headed around their kitchen island, and abruptly stopped, not believing what he was seeing. Jonah was sticking a fork into a Brussel sprout, the vegetable he thought was the most repugnant vegetable on Earth. Before he could ask, his boyfriend began slicing it using a mandolin. “Am I hallucinating? You and an evil sprout, together, in our kitchen?”

Jonah pointed with the speared sprout at his open laptop. “Michael recommended this recipe. Its author claims even sprout haters would love them. I wanted to try something new. In winter, it’s always difficult to find fresh vegetables.”

“Did you find it on that blog Michael is always talking about? Meat Meets Veg or something.”

“No, it’s on another site. And Michael can’t stop talking about Taylor. The blog is his beard.”

Ren snorted. “He told me something about a Skype cooking event. Every party suggests recipes, and then everyone cooks it in their own kitchen. Afterwards, they eat together.”

“A dinner conference? Sounds cool. Do you think we could participate too?”

“I already promised Michael we’d log in tonight to get to know everyone who’s participating.”

“How about we suggest your rocket salad recipe with goat cheese and rosemary apple as first course? Meat eaters could sprinkle it with roasted bacon.”

“Maybe we should make apples a theme.”

“Let’s ask the others tonight.”

“Should I tell them where I got the recipe?”

“Sure. Why not?”

“It’s a little embarrassing. When Eric cheated on me, I thought it was because I got lazy and fat.”

Ren laughed. “You!”

“Yeah. I bought this book Eric was always talking about. It was about working out and eating healthy. The only recipe I still use is the rocket salad.”

“Eric was a moron.” Ren kissed Jonah’s cheek. “And now you’re mine.”

****

Taran was drawn to the kitchen by the aroma of warm, holiday spices permeating the air. “What are you baking? It smells amazing?” he asked, as Cole pulled a braided loaf out of the oven. It was golden brown and glistening in the kitchen light.

“It’s the Christmas bread recipe I got off that site.”

“Are we having it as a snack?” his boyfriend asked.

“No, we’ll have it tomorrow morning as we open gifts.”

“And do I get some of those sausage balls you made?” Taran asked, as he hugged Cole from behind. “I’ve been drooling since you baked some of them last week. That was sage from the garden out back, right?”

“It was. Brody picked some special, and I hung it on the wall.”

Taran nuzzled Cole affectionately and almost purred in contentment.

“What are we having for Christmas dinner?” he asked. “You’re making the soup, and Delia’s bringing the scallop pasta dish.”

“Well,” Cole said turning, pulling out of his boyfriend’s embrace. “I talked with Delia, and she says Tom’s grandma always made lasagna every Christmas.”

Taran scowled. “But your lasagna sauce has meat in it.”

“Yes,” Cole said brightly. “But I have an idea.” He grinned and continued, “I’m going to make a batch of my lasagna casserole and then add meat to half of it in a separate dish. That way we’ll have both veggie and a carnivore version.”

“I see,” Taran said. “I love that casserole, and it sounds like a simple fix.”

“Yep,” Cole said. “I already shared that recipe on the blog, the Meat Meets Veg site.”

“Anything I can do to help?”

Cole looked over and smiled. “How about you mix up a batch of punch for tomorrow? Maybe we could sample a touch of it tonight.”

“Maybe,” Taran answered. “What time are Delia and Tom coming over?”

“Later, after they spend it with other relatives.” Cole paused, seeming to ponder something, and picked up a measuring cup filled with flour. “You know, they’re talking about a live event on that blog.”

Taran snorted. “You mean like a YouTube post or something?”

“No, like a Skype event or Facetime, and we can meet the people behind the recipes.”

“That sounds, um . . . different,” Taran said, his lips twisted into a sour expression.

“Don’t be such a grouch,” Cole said, waving him away. “I’ve been getting to know these people, you know, from their stories. They tell a little bit about themselves when they present the recipes.”

“Really?” Taran said, crossing his arms and leaning back. “Like how?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Cole said softly. “They tell a little story about why a recipe is special to them and how it came to them, through grandma or from a friend, or how they adapted it to work in different circumstances. It’s quite revealing, if you really think about it.”

“Maybe I should check this out more closely,” Taran said, uncrossing his arms and looking far more curious than he had.

“Maybe you should,” Cole responded. “Now, I need to get this bread dough started.”

He noticed Taran was in the other room at the laptop, reading intently.

*****

“Did you pick what recipe you’re going to make for your Skype thing yet?” Lucas asked, after blowing on a spoonful of soup.

Taylor frowned and stirred their cup of soup. They shrugged.

“What’s wrong, Tayley? You’ve been so excited about this. You’ll get to see Michael.”

“Yeah, I’m really excited about that, but nervous too. I mean… I guess… well… after Shane, I’m kind of afraid of how he’ll react.”

“It’ll be fine. Shane was a dick. If Michael doesn’t see what an awesome person you are, then that’s on him, not you. Besides, if he hurts you, I’ll fly to Germany and kick his ass.”

Taylor grinned. “You’re an awesome friend, you know that?”

Lucas nodded sagely. “Yup.”

Taylor wrapped their hands around their soup mug. “I don’t know why I care so much what he thinks. I mean, he’s in Germany for fuck’s sake. It’s not like we’ll ever be in a real relationship.”

“You care because you care about him. There’s nothing wrong with that. Online friendships are just as meaningful as in person friendships.”

“Yeah, I suppose. But what if I want more than friendship?”

“Then if it’s meant to be, it will work out.”

“It is what is it?” Taylor raised an eyebrow.

Lucas rolled his eyes. “I hate that saying. What I mean is, don’t worry about it so much. Enjoy your relationship for what it is and what happens, happens.”

“Yeah. What I said.”

Lucas snorted. “So. Recipe? What’d you choose?”

“That’s another thing… we’re supposed to pick a family recipe.” Taylor sipped their soup.

“So? Don’t you have a favorite you can share?” Lucas regretted the words almost as soon as he spoke them. Taylor never talked much about their family. All Lucas knew was his friend’s background was much different than his. He didn’t know why Taylor was estranged from their mother, but assumed it had to do with being non-binary.

“I’m embarrassed to share what we used to have for Christmas,” Taylor said softly, looking down.

Lucas’ heart broke for his friend. He was used to Tigger Taylor—bouncing all over with energy. Not Eeyore Taylor, downcast and sad. Lucas slid his chair closer to his friend and put his arm around their shoulders. “Hey… don’t be embarrassed. Tell me about it.”

Taylor smiled and leaned into Lucas. They sighed. “Well, it all depended on what the food pantry gave us. I remember my mom made these hot dogs once. The sauce was so good. Sweet and tangy. I think it was made with chili sauce and jelly. One year, we were lucky enough to get a ham. She made it with ginger ale and mac and cheese on the side.”

“I’ve had meatballs with sauce like that. You should make that. I bet people will love it.”

“Well my favorite was corn chowder. Sometimes we got a shit-ton of canned veggies, and my mom would dump them all in a pot and make soup. The corn chowder was the best. Potatoes are cheap, so we’d get some potatoes and mix them together with the canned corn and some milk. It was really good in the winter.”

“I think we have a winner! Can’t go wrong with corn chowder. I want some already!”

Taylor grinned and bounced in their seat. “Really? You don’t think it sounds gross or too cheap? I mean, the people on the blog are all really good cooks. I don’t know about adding canned stuff.”

Lucas shook his head. “Nope! Not at all. Besides, you can always change the recipe. Use frozen corn instead.”

Taylor bounced in their seat. “Perfect! And cream would make it taste better than milk.”

“Does it have meat in it?”

“Bacon. It would taste really good with ham too. Both those are easily left out.”

Lucas scrunched his brows as he thought. “You could even sub cauliflower for the potato, since a lot of people are staying away from extra carbs. How would it taste with roasted cauliflower?”

Taylor shrugged. “I think it would taste fine like that. I can suggest it, but I think I’ll stick with potatoes for the demo.”

“Sounds like you’ve made up your mind.”

Taylor stood, almost knocking their chair over and hop-skipped to their laptop. “I have to let Michael know I finally decided on my recipe!”

****

Ren positioned the laptop on top a large plastic box. “It should be safe here, even when your chopping gets wild.”

“My chopping, uh-huh. How about we call Michael and test everything to make sure it works?”

“Good idea.” Ren opened the app and clicked on their friend’s name.

Seconds later, Michael grinned at them. “Looking good.” Then he squinted at Jonah. “What are you wearing?”

Jonah straightened his red t-shirt, so he could read the words: Naughty, Nice, Cook. The little box in front of ‘Cook’ was checked. Next, he grabbed a Santa hat. “Too much?”

Michael shook his head. “Perfect.” Then he turned his head. “And Ren is wearing cheerful black, as always.”

Ren shrugged and aligned his Japanese chef knives on the counter in front of him. Then he pointed at the ingredients on the counter behind him. “Everything is ready. We printed the recipes and can start whenever.”

“And we’re sooo curious to meet Taylor. Right, Ren?”

****

“Bye, Cole! Bye Jonah and Ren! Merry Christmas!” Taylor waved wildly at their laptop’s camera, grinning.

His new friends were exactly what they’d envisioned. Cole was thoughtful and methodical, efficient in the kitchen and super nice. His boyfriend, Taran, had popped in periodically to ‘help’—more like sample—and was an absolute cutie. Their lasagna recipe had been a big hit.

Jonah made Taylor wish they lived in Germany. Quirky, funny, and super intelligent, Taylor knew they’d be best friends if they lived closer. Ren was more reserved, but was clearly devoted to Jonah. Jonah and Ren made all the vegetarian options, and shared a recipe for an arugula salad that would pair perfectly with Cole’s lasagna.

And Michael… Taylor was glad Lucas was around to keep them on task, otherwise Taylor would have babbled at Michael all evening instead of cooking. Michael was gorgeous. And adorable. And funny. And that German accent… Taylor could listen to him speak all day. His recipe for Buffalo cauliflower bites was so good too.

Even though Taylor had been worried about their corn chowder, it was a huge hit. Jonah had suggested adding fresh corn in addition to the canned corn. Cole had suggested using a combination of heavy cream and half and half.

“Bye Taylor!” Cole waved into the camera. “Merry Christmas to you too, from both of us!” Cole and Taran’s faces disappeared from the screen when they disconnected the call.

“Auf wiedersehen! Fröhliche Weihnachten! Merry Christmas!” Jonah bowed, almost losing his Santa hat. Ren grabbed it before it could fall and rolled his eyes. Their faces disappeared too, leaving only one person on Taylor’s screen.

Michael smiled and gave a little wave. “Thank you for agreeing to stay on a little longer.”

Taylor blushed. Like I could say no to that! “Of course! It’s been great meeting you. Too bad Germany is so far away.”

Michael sighed. “Ja. Well, I wanted to give you your Christmas present.”

Taylor raised an eyebrow. “How can you give me a present over the internet?”

Michael grinned. “I can’t. But I can tell you what it is before you get it.” He glanced down and bit his lip.

Taylor wanted to reach through the screen and kiss him. They bounced up and down. “Oooo what is it? I love surprises!”

Michael looked into the camera. “Well, I hope you like this one.” He held up a plastic Christmas ornament. It was Deadpool wearing a Santa hat.

Taylor squealed and hopped up and down. “I love it! Thank you!”

Michael grinned. “Gut! Can I talk to your friend, Lucas? I need the address where to send it.”

Taylor nodded. “Lukey?” They turned toward their friend.

Lucas gestured toward the living room. “Mom wants to talk to you for a sec.”

Taylor frowned, looked at Michael, then the living room, then back to Michael. “Oh. OK. Well, it was great getting to know you better, Michael. We’ll have to do this again sometime.”

“Yes, definitely! Bye, Taylor.”

“Bye,” Taylor said, and walked into the living room, not wanting the conversation to end.

“So, Lucas. Are we on?” Michael asked. “They don’t suspect?”

Lucas grinned and shook his head. “We’re definitely on, and nope. Taylor’s just like Jon Snow. They know nothing.”

They both laughed as they said goodbye and disconnected the Skype call.

****

Taylor was firmly in Eeyore mode. Ever since the blog Skype event, they missed Michael terribly. To make it worse, Michael emailed less. He said he was super busy, but Taylor’s insecurities had risen big-time, until they were convinced the adorable German hated them.

And now Lucas had abandoned them. On New Year’s Eve, no less. They were stuck playing charades with Lucas’ parents. Charades could be fun, but not when Taylor wanted to wallow in self-pity and be pissed at their best friend for running out without them.

“Uh… a dog?” they guessed. Lucas’ father panted and grinned, holding both hands up like a t-rex. Taylor didn’t want to say what he really looked like.

“Kangaroo!” Lucas’ mom yelled.

“Right! OK, Taylor. Your turn!”

Taylor was saved from having to pantomime ‘making out’ by Lucas returning home. Thank God in heaven for that!

“Hey Tayley! Guess what? You got something in the mail today!” Lucas yelled as he walked through the front door.

Taylor grinned. They’d been waiting for Michael’s ornament to arrive. “Yeah? Cool! Where is it?” They bounced over to Lucas.

“On the porch.” Lucas smirked.

He couldn’t bring it in? Whatever. Taylor stepped out the door, looking down for a package from Germany. They saw a pair of black shoes and blue jeans. As they looked up, they stared into the blue eyes of the man they’d been crushing so hard on. “Michael?”

“Ja. Surprise and Happy New Year!”

“Oh my God!” Taylor pounced on him, hugging him tightly. “I can’t believe you’re here!”

Michael wrapped his arms around the smaller Taylor and smiled. “Lucas helped me keep it secret. I hope you’re not disappointed.”

“Are you insane? This is awesome! I’m so happy to see you!”

They stood, holding each other for a minute before Michael spoke again. “Can I do what I’ve wanted ever since I first saw you?”

“If you mean kiss me, then fuck yeah.”

Michael nodded and laughed. “Yeah, that’s exactly what I meant.”

And that’s exactly what they did.

 

Rocket salad

4 big handfuls rocket (arugula)

4 tart apples
1 good handful pine nuts, toasted

Fresh Rosemary, to taste

4 tbsp Walnut oil/ Olive oil

3 tbsp tarragon vinegar
Freshly ground black pepper

1 tbsp honey

4 portions goat cream cheese or soft goat cheese
A pinch of salt

Crumbled bacon (optional)

1. Slice apples.

2. Fry apple slices briefly, together with rosemary.

3. Deglaze with vinegar mixed with honey.

4. Arrange rocket, apple slices and cheese on a large plate.

5. Sprinkle with vinegar mix from the pan, roasted pine nuts, and/or bacon.

 

Buffalo Cauliflower

INGREDIENTS

• ¾ cup all-purpose flour or crushed pork rinds
• 2 tsp garlic powder
• 1 ½ tsp paprika
• ½ cup heavy cream
• 2 pounds bite-size cauliflower florets
• ¼ cup harissa or Frank’s Hot Sauce (Frank’s would be more traditional)
• 2 tbsp melted butter
• Salt and pepper, to taste
• Blue cheese dressing, for dipping

DIRECTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 450°F.
2. Whisk together flour or pork rinds, garlic powder, paprika, and salt/pepper. Add heavy cream, along with ⅓ cup water and mix until smooth.
3. Add Cauliflower and coat with mixture. Place a parchment-lined sheet pan in a single layer, leaving about ½ inch between pieces.
4. Bake 8-10 minutes or until crispy. Remove pan from oven, turn cauliflower over and bake an additional 8-10 minutes.
5. Reduce oven temperature to 350°F.
6. Combine harissa and butter in a medium sized bowl. Toss cooked cauliflower to coat evenly. Replace parchment paper and place cauliflower in a single layer on baking sheet. Bake 15-18 minutes, turning halfway through, until browned and crisp. Serve with blue cheese.

 

Corn chowder

• 1 pound bacon, diced

• 8 potatoes (medium), diced to 1/4" (peel if desired)

• 4 cups water (I drain the whole corn and reserve the liquid for this portion, adding water to make up the difference)

• 1 large onion, chopped

• 2 cans cream corn

• 4 cans whole kernel corn

• black pepper to taste

• 4 teaspoons salt

• 4 cups Half & Half

• 4 Tablespoons cornstarch

 

1. Cook bacon until it is mostly rendered. Reserve 1/4 cup grease in stock pot.

 

2. Add potatoes and onion to the pot with reserved bacon grease and bacon. Cook and stir for 5 minutes.

 

3. Add water and stir in corn (I've found that 4 cans corn tends to be 3 cups liquid). Season with salt & pepper. Bring to boil, reduce heat to low, cover and simmer for 20 minutes or until potatoes are tender.

 

4. Mix cornstarch into half & half, add to pot and bring just shy of boiling. Add additional cornstarch to reach your desired thickness.

 

5. This makes about 7 quarts of soup, but can easily be divided to make a smaller batch. Freezes very well too!

 

*I used two packages of frozen corn and 2 cans whole corn. I also used heavy cream instead of half and half. Cauliflower can be subbed for potatoes, although the corn makes this not exactly low carb.

 

Lasagna recipe can be found in Cole Matthews’ chapter “A Vision in Frost”.