Plattenbau - 19. Chapter 19- Mother

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"This is..." Alex's mother said, trailing off when she spotted the half-dozen empty beer bottles that were lined up on the windowsill and the overflowing ashtray on the coffee table.

Fuck, I should have cleaned it up...why do I always procrastinate on doing this shit?! Ed thought and cursed himself for being such a sloppy, lazy pig. His panic increased when she walked over to his bookshelf and took out one of his many self-help books that he had bought in the misguided belief that they would actually help him. He hadn't even noticed how much he was shaking until Alex, who had stood by his side the entire time, grabbed his hand and quietly whispered, "Just tell her to leave. You don't have to do this."

But Ed shook his head, determined to endure this cross-examination, even if it would bring him close to the point of breaking down. He quickly glanced at the woman, making sure she was still busy invading his privacy before he bent down and placed a kiss on Alex's cheek. "I'm a big boy. I can handle a harpy pulling out my intestines.'' Ed half-heartedly joked trying to reassure Alex, and also partly himself, that it was going to be fine. He gave Alex's hand one last squeeze and then let it go.

"So... what do you do for a living?" The petite woman asked, while looking at the dust that she had just wiped off the bookshelf with her finger.

"Uhm, well..." Ed stuttered, embarrassed that he had still not found a job after all that time.

"What 'uhm'?!" The woman hissed back, wiped her dusty hand off on her black skirt, and turned towards them with a deeply annoyed look on her face.

From the corner of his eye. Ed noticed how Alex immediately lowered his gaze and even took a tiny step back so he was half hidden behind his larger frame. Ed’s first instinct was to tell her to calm the fuck down because she was scaring her own child, but he realized that she probably was too angry to care for that. Fine... Just be honest but leave out anything that she could use against you. He reminded himself and took a deep breath before speaking.

"I currently don't have a job. I used to be in the army, but after... I just couldn't do it anymore." Ed replied, hoping that the topic would be off the table with that but when she immediately shot back he felt like she had just punched him in the stomach.

"What, did you join the army because you thought it would be fun?!" She laughed and then added with a disgusted look, "Good thing you are no longer in the army because we definitely don't need people in there that are too cowardly to do their job."

Ed was too taken aback to really respond. It wasn't like he disagreed, because he damn well knew that he was a coward for leaving the army while his comrades were still risking their lives every single day in some god forsaken backwards country. And not only was that gnawing on his conscience, but also the fact that he was still living off the veterans disability compensation, like he was some sort of cripple even though he hadn't lost any body parts or gotten any physical illnesses.

"I... I just..." He finally tried to defend himself but the words just got stuck in his throat, making him choke on his own tongue. Desperately, he tried to push down all the feelings and thoughts that suddenly flooded his mind but he miserably failed and the entire dam started to crumble like wet paper.

Alex watched helplessly as his strong bear of a man shattered right in front of his eyes. He knew his mother could be brutal, but this was even too much for her. Ed's entire body trembled, and his lips moved as if he was talking, even though not a single noise was audible. Streams of tears were running down his checks. He wanted to hug Ed so desperately and tell him that everything was okay, but he didn't know what was going through the big guy's head or if he would even want to hear something like that at that moment. Scared, he looked back to his mother, who looked more than pleased with herself. The teen was terrified because he knew from personal experience that she was just getting started. Like a shark that had smelled blood she went for it.

"See, if he doesn't even have the balls to defend himself, how is he going to defend you, then?!" She shook her head and walked over to him. "I don't know what you were thinking but this-" she pointed at Ed and then continued, "this is way below what you deserve. I'm sure you can find someone way better fairly quickly. Also-"

"Why the hell did you do that?!" Alex screamed, surprising her and himself by how loud he was. For a moment she gave him one of her famous death glares but then she pulled herself together and coldly stated that she was doing it for his own good. "My own good?! How is it for my own good when you hurt my boyfriend?!" He questioned her, his voice fuelled by the worry he felt for Ed's well-being and the anger towards her for causing him so much pain. Before she could even answer him, he grabbed the older man's hand and stepped in front of him, in an attempt to shield Ed from his mother's wrath. "I get that you don't like the fact that we are dating but that doesn't give you the right to talk to him like that!"

The woman seemed baffled by her son's sudden determination to stand his ground, but then her eyes narrowed on the blond. "You-" She hissed but got cut off by Alex before she could utter another word.

"I'm talking to you. Leave Ed out of this!" He demanded and took another step forward, so that he was right up in her face.

Shocked, the middle aged women stared at him. She had never expected her son to be able to bite back in such a manner. "Have you forgotten who you are talking to?!" She questioned, trying to remind him that she was his mother and that he couldn't talk to her like that but Alex didn't budge even an inch and instead hissed back.

"Oh I know exactly who I'm talking to! That's why I know that I have to do this." He was sick and tired of always having to tread carefully around her in order not to make her blow up. After taking a quick look over his shoulder at Ed, who still seemed to be completely somewhere else mentally, he straightened his back and decided that for once she had to hear what he really felt, whether she liked it or not. "I get that you are furious and bitter about what Paul made you go through and how he treated you all these years. Believe me, now that I finally know about it, I'm fucking pissed too! He can burn in hell for all I care." The teen explained, trying to make her understand that he understood where all her pain came from and that he was just as angry at his father as she was.

"BUT!" He continued, taking a deep breath before continuing to speak the words that had laid on his heart like lead for years, "This doesn't make it okay for you to take it out on someone that has nothing to do with your misery! If you let out your emotions out on me it's one thing. I can take it, and know how to handle your poisonous words, but not HIM!" Feeling like he had said enough for now. Alex turned his attention towards Ed. From how she looked at him he figured that she probably needed some time to let it sink in.

"Ed?" The younger guy asked, trying to get the older man's attention, but he got nothing besides a bank stare that saw right through him, as if he didn't even exist. He carefully reached out his hand and laid it on Ed's cheek. "Ed, can you hear me?" But again he got no response whatsoever. Shit, what am I supposed to do?! He has never behaved like that. Fuck!

"Alex?" He suddenly heard his mother ask, her voice surprisingly soft and even somewhat hesitant.

With a quick look over his shoulder, he asked what she wanted and then turned his attention immediately back to Ed.

The blond was no longer crying but the look on his face and the complete unresponsive behavior told Alex that his boyfriend was in a very bad place mentally.
But, he had no idea what could help him or what he could do to make it better. All he could do was to gently caress his check and hope he would come back from the nightmare he was in eventually.

"Do you know if he has friends from his time in the military?" The petite woman asked, while watching her son be so intimate with the wreck of a man he called his boyfriend.

The teen shrugged and hesitantly replied, "I don't know. Why are you asking?"

She took a deep breath. Even though it went against all her instincts, she knew if she didn't put this right her son would never forgive her. "I'm asking because you are clearly unable to help... And I don't care about him." She said, mumbling the last part under her breath.

"But I want to help him." Alex whimpered even though he knew she was right about him not being able to do so.

"Well we don't always get what we want." She stated bitterly and then added, "So, do you know someone you could call?"

Alex thought about it for a moment. There was Wilhelm, Ed's childhood friend but the guy was rude as fuck and didn't had the gentle touch that Ed probably needed at the moment. Fuck, I barely know any of Ed's friends! Wait, does he even have friends besides Wilhelm?! Maybe I could call his sister? No, they just started talking again and she lives too far away....

Alex shook his head, finally realizing how alone Ed must have been all this time. It felt like his stomach had been filled with stones when he finally remembered something.

"Karl!" Alex blurted out, remembering that Wilhelm had mentioned the man's name and that he and Ed had been in the same unit when in the military. He also remembered meeting the man once when he had brought a black-out drunk Ed back home. From what he had noticed the guy had been quite friendly and caring, so he was probably the best candidate to help Ed in a situation like this. Quickly, the teen walked to the kitchen where he knew the blond put his mobile phone most of the time. For a moment he struggled figuring out how the buttons on that thing, that was probably older then he himself was, worked but after finding Karl name in the contacts he called him, praying that the man would pick up.

It took quite a moment but then he heard the man's gentle voice. "What's wrong?" He asked, sounding already concerned even though he hadn't even heard what was going on.

"Uhm... hello sir... it's me Alex. Ed's uhm... boyfriend?" The teen shuttered. But, before he could even say another word or explain anything the older man already said that he would be there in around fifteen minutes and then had hung up. Baffled Alex looked at the phone until the tiny display turned dark again.
Maybe this isn't the first time? He wondered and made his way back to the living room.

What he saw there surprised him. Ed was no longer standing in the middle of the room but instead sitting on the couch, his stare still empty and far removed from everything around him. But, what surprised the teen the most was that his mother was also sitting on the couch with the black kitten on her lap. "I thought you were allergic?" He questioned her when he came closer.

She only briefly looked up before she continued petting the black fluff-ball. "No, I just don't want pets at home. They make too much of a mess." She simply stated as if the lie she had told him all his life wasn't a big deal whatsoever. Alex swallowed the lump in his throat, and then told her that Ed's friend would come over in a few minutes.

Quietly, they waited for the man, Alex occupied with holding his boyfriend's hand and his mother busy stroking Lilly's soft fur. When Karl showed up, he almost immediately ushered them out, saying that he knew what to do and that Alex didn't need to worry. The teen quickly placed a kiss on Ed's forehead and then left with his mother.

"I still don't like that you are together with him." She said when they were back in their apartment. Alex wanted to tell her that he didn't care, but when he opened his mouth she lifted her hand, signaling him that she wasn't done talking.

"I don't think he is good for you and I'm very concerned about you getting hurt but..." she took a deep breath and continued, "You are almost an adult and I should maybe trust your decision."

"Uhm... thanks?" Alex said, uncomfortable and somewhat confused by his mothers untypical behavior.

A suffocating silence fell between them, when his mother suddenly suggested something he would have never thought he would hear from her, "A colleague of mine suggested that the both of us maybe go to family therapy to deal with some issues. I originally didn't want to, but I guess it doesn't sound like an un-worthwhile idea."

"Yeah, it actually sounds good." Alex agreed.

"Yes... Well, let's eat dinner first. I made some Borscht."

"Oh great. Just what I needed."