The English Year - 53. Decisions

There was something about the way Pete loved me that is decidedly difficult to explain.

When we were together, I felt as if he saw me. Not only with his eyes, but with his heart as well. After everything we’d been through, there was a mutual sense that we didn’t ever want to spend any time apart.

When we made love, I felt like he penetrated me. Not only with his rigid cock, that found its way exploring places inside of me that had yet to be explored by any of the guy’s I’d been with up to that point, but he penetrated me with his eyes as well. Deep inside of me. When we fucked, he looked at me, and our eye contact added to the sheer pleasure he sent through me with every thrust.

After I won my trial, Pete pulled me in, undressed me slowly, and with his strong arms, lifted me and set me gently on his freshly made bed. Right there, on top of his comforter, he undressed slowly as I licked my lips. I pushed everything aside as he tugged on his already hard uncut cock, and slid seamlessly between my spread legs.

I let him in with no resistance. I deserved his cock, I thought. I’d been through the wringer tonight. And while there were still unanswered questions spinning in my mind left and right, I allowed Pete to fuck those questions away.

And that night, that’s exactly what he did. I laid my head back on his pillow, wrapped my legs around his back, and met his thrusts with bucks of my own.

“Fuck,” I sighed with a passion that I couldn’t help. I knew I should have been back at the house repairing bridges. I knew I should have been on the phone begging Mike to forgive me. I knew I should have been at work thanking the witnesses who’d helped me get away with writing the infamous article, but landing myself in a much better position than I could ever imagine.

But instead, I sighed with contentment as every inch of Pete found its way past my prostate with a force that I couldn’t help but love.

“Oh fuck, Pete,” I pulled him down to me by his neck, sucking his tongue into mine. He moaned into my mouth. He sent a vibration down my spine.

“I’m glad you won, killer,” he sighed. I watched him sit up, grab my ankles, and dive forcefully into me. He bit his lip. I grabbed him by the ass and pulled him in as deep as he could go.

He bucked hard. I moaned. He bucked again. I let out a sigh. I kept my eyes fixed on his. He gave me a look, asking if I was ready. I let out a silent nod. He drove in with no mercy. Faster, harder, and more passionate than he’d ever done.

I turned my head, bit my lip so I wouldn’t scream, and enjoyed every pulse, every push and pull, every penetration of Pete’s dick.

And then he let out a roar. It was low, guttural, and like nothing I’d ever heard come out of him. I turned back to look at him. I clawed at his chest, trying to find his neck again. Fighting my own climax until I felt his, I finally found his neck, and once again pulled him down so that I could kiss him firmly while he continued to piston in and out of me. I couldn’t help reaching the point of no return. His cock was rubbing against my sensitive prostate, giving it the massage it deserved. I held Pete against me. I let go of his lips, bit down on his neck, and pulled him even closer. He never missed a fucking beat.

I dug my fingers into his back. I was sure I scratched through his skin. I wouldn’t have been surprised if I drew blood. But I couldn’t help it. Every ounce of tension I’d been through the last few hours was being fucked out of me, and I couldn’t help but match that intensity.

“Fuck…” Pete roared into the pillow that rested on the side of my face.

In a moment that is so rare, and admittedly so cliche, I felt Pete erupt into me as I simultaneously came between our two torsos. Two men coming together is such an overhyped moment, but that night, Pete and I achieved the impossible.

We breathed simultaneously. Our orgasms came down in unison. We were intertwined. It was as if we were glued together. Literally by all the cum that stuck to us, and figuratively.

And still, I had to fight to push all the other thoughts out of my head. They swirled. I fought, and Pete and I lay there together, doing our best to stay in that moment.

“I’m glad you won,” he repeated softly in my ear. “What’s next?”

“What’s next is I spend the next three weeks before initiation fixing everything, and setting Ben up to beat Hutch in the elections later on.”

Pete nodded, finding the nook of my neck, and settling in behind me.

“How are you going to fix everything?”

I took a deep breath and settled into his body. He wrapped his arm around me, holding me tight as if I was going to run away. Again.

“Guys are pretty simple,” I replied. “If I can navigate Fancy Ball, and all of this trial bullshit, I can navigate the guys in the house.”

I wasn’t sure what the timeline for the SEC was, but I needed everything to be copasetic between the guys and I by the time I was sworn in. The dean was right. There was no campus wide power if I couldn’t manage the relationships within my own house. And so in a post coital come down, Pete and I talked through exactly how I could win the guys over.

And In so doing, I think I reminded Pete of some of the reasons he’d fallen for me in the first place. I was charming, and I planned to be over the next three weeks. Combative Corbin was a character I got to play in order to get my way, but sometimes you had to go back to being the carefree, fun loving guy that got you access to begin with.

And so while Pete and I settled into our dating routine over the next three weeks, I made an effort to win back the guys of Chi Beta.

I went to fraternity lunch almost every day starting with the Tuesday after the trial. Sure it was awkward for a second, but after cracking a joke about still being around, I nonchalantly started tearing down walls. After lunch, I walked with Roberto to the local ice cream place in town to see if we could get a couple gallons for dinner that night to surprise the guys. There was no chapter, but we did have an intense lineup scheduled for the pledges since they’d missed the Monday one. Ice cream would ease the tension, I thought.

“How are you going to get the cadet to forgive you?” Roberto asked as we headed down Washington Ave towards Sweet Things. I didn’t ask what the breakdown of what the vote was, but Roberto was the only one of my brothers who had indicated before the trial he was on my side, and didn’t need to be swayed by my defense.

“Honestly, I have no idea,” I replied, digging my hands deep into my pocket to avoid them getting cold. I should have brought gloves, I thought.

“It was pretty brutal, what you said to him. I don’t know if I’d forgive you after that.”

The thought crossed my mind, but I couldn’t dwell on it. Mike would have to forgive me. Even if our relationship was never the same, he would have to forgive me. I'd have to find a way to make him.

“The thing with Mike,” I told Roberto. “Loyalty is ingrained in him. It has to be. To VMI. To his dad. To anything he decides to love. God, he’s had the same Jeep since high school. He’s come so far from where he and I started. He won’t let that go over this.”

I heard the words come out of my mouth, more convincing to me than they were to Roberto.

I had three short weeks to figure it out, and in that time, I continued to work things from every angle I could.

I took the freshmen pledges out to lunch, one by one. I asked what they thought of their upcoming initiation, and most of them were excited. I gave them advice on how to survive Hell Week, the final week of their pledgeship, and the most grueling seven days of their lives before initiation.

Unsurprisingly, the only pledge that didn't take me up on my offer for a free meal that wasn’t the low-rent fraternity fair was David. In fact, in that span of time, David didn’t respond to any of my attempts to reach him. The only time I saw him was when I participated in one of their line-ups, and then I didn’t want to single him out. So I allowed him to avoid me. He had every right to.

I ate dinner with my class every night that I could, including Hutch. I didn’t let on that I was having secret conversations with Ben, who had suddenly emerged from his smoke den of a bedroom to be more involved with all of us as well. I didn’t let on that I was coaching him on how to handle things, and get himself primed on the elections that would get underway after the pledges were initiated. And I didn’t let on that my main motivation for being active was to return to everyone’s good graces.

One night as Ben and I walked down to the Great Hall together, I reminded him that Hutch had been campaigning since our freshman year for this election. There was no such thing as starting too early for him to undercut what most guys in the house saw as an eventuality, but Ben and I knew could be a potential coup.

Outside of the house, I spent more time on campus dressed the part of the newly minted SEC representative. In the business school, guys from frats that I’d never brushed elbows with came up to me and made casual conversation. Girls from the major houses, Kappa-Kappa Gamma and Kappa Delta, sat with me in the study lounges and made small talk. Of course I had friends in every house and already came in with a sense of inclusion when it came to the few people I knew. I had gone from having one or two friends in each house to being someone everyone wanted, needed, to get to know. I was suddenly abreast of different agendas across campus, and slowly but surely, I began to take stock and inventory of who all of these new acquaintances were. But as it became clear that I was going to be on the SEC, that inclusion morphed into a sense of belonging.

I hung out with Chip quite a bit on campus as well. It was important to be seen with him, as we had already discussed at length how I would take over his committee chairmanship on the IFC. We had a summit to pull together for that May, and as we rolled into the middle of March, we realized we had our work cut out for us.

But we couldn’t fail. We couldn’t let the powers that be down, and so we spent a lot of time being seen working in the business center together, fielding off questions, and playing the part of a dynamic duo.

And then there was Pete. For the first time during my tenure at ODU, I had a boyfriend. Not just a fuck buddy, or someone cute enough to use for a warm bed and a mouthful of cum. Navigating that, along with everything else, didn’t come without its challenges, but for the most part, Pete and I were up to the task, and on the same page. In total sync.

He kept busy with the advertising intensive. I kept busy with everything else. And at night, we would decide whose place to crash at. We made a point to spend every night together, regardless of when the other got home. With our schedules rare to overlap during the day, we decided this detail of our relationship was pretty important.

Sometimes we managed to get together early enough. We would go to his suite and make love for hours while Adam was away doing lineups or hanging out at the frat house. Some nights, he wouldn’t get done with his work until well into the evening, and I’d text him to come up the back landing to avoid being seen and we’d pull together a quick fuck before falling asleep wrapped together.

In those three weeks, we slept together every night. We made love almost every night, regardless of how tired we were. We looked into each other’s eyes and caught up on our different paths every single night.

And every night, I felt loved. In some ways, I think we both felt as if we had to prove to the other we were worthy of each other’s love. I felt that from him, and I certainly felt that after all we’d been through, I needed to remind him constantly that I was worth him loving. It felt important, if not bordering on necessary.

That Friday, I pried myself away from Pete just long enough to rub elbows and conduct the vote at the IFC meeting. There was other business to attend to, but a few things pertaining to the summit were all voted on. In a rare occasion, the officers of the Panhellenic Greek Council were also there to witness the vote.

The things that were agreed to were the date of the first summit. It would be held the second week of May, after most houses had conducted elections for the following year. Each house would send all elected officers, including the newly elected compliance officer. Chip and I would work on speaker lists, bringing in medical, legal, and psychological experts from around the country. We opened it up to anyone with suggestions on who they thought would make a good panelist. Someone suggested we reach out to the Gender Relations and Healthy Dating club that was already on campus, and we made a note of it.

All in all, the vote went according to plan, and with the final tally, Chip and I solidified our legacy.

The following night, Pete and I celebrated by attending the final party our pledges were going to throw. It was a reminder that Hell Week was just seven days away, and their servitude was coming to an end.

“Is it going to be weird?” Pete asked as we got dressed in my room. We were both sipping on vodka lemonades I had brought up from the basement kitchen. “Showing up to a party with a boyfriend?”

“I’ve gone to parties with you a bunch of times, and it’s not weird,” I replied. I walked over to where he was pulling on his shirt and gave him a peck on the cheek. “I like it. And I like you.”

“Like?” He cocked his head back and smirked. I went in for another kiss, and he pulled his head even further. “Like?”

I grinned.

“I like you,” I teased, going in for another kiss. I felt Mister rub against the back of my leg.

“Well then what am I doing loving you?” he joked. “If all I get is a like?”

“Fine,” I pulled him in closer, wrapping my arm around his waist. “I love you too.”

And I did. With as much of my heart as I could possibly muster. Pete was finally right there. I finally had the man I’d been dreaming of for the better part of the school year.

And yet a part of that heart was missing. Even standing there taking off the clothes we had just put on, feeling each other’s bodies, kissing each other’s skin from head to toe, taking his cock deep down my throat, I felt like something was missing.

And that missing piece was obviously Mike. There was no denying it, as much as I tried. As much as I tried to wash away the guilt with a mouthful of Pete’s cum, I couldn’t.

I got down on my knees in front of Pete, unzipped his trousers, and sucked him in forcefully. He moaned audibly, running his hand through my hair and pulling back and forth. I loved it when he took control of the pace. I loved it when he stuffed his cock down my throat. I loved it when he forced me to forget that there was another love of my life, and he wasn’t there.

I tried as hard as I could to compartmentalize the two guys, but on that Saturday night, as I sucked Pete’s cock, trying hard to forget, I knew I had a decision to make. And that decision was just around the corner, in two short weeks.

With a grunt, and a moan, and several swipes of my tongue from head to balls, Pete finally shot a load of cum down my throat. He pulled back slightly so that some of his seed could coat my tongue, and then pulled me up for a kiss, sharing it and swapping it back and forth.

“You’re amazing,” Pete whispered in my ear. He didn’t have a toothbrush, and so we agreed to go to the party with his cum on both of our breaths. It was hot knowing we had just shared that moment, and then minutes later walked downstairs to the party, mixing, mingling, and sharing our little cum flavored secret.

For their credit, the pledges did an excellent job with their finale. The entire Great Hall was lined with black balloons and streamers. When Pete and I pushed our way into the dimly lit room, we were greeted by a pledge with two masks and two glasses of champagne. The pledges were all in black slacks and white shirts, along with silver or black masquerade masks, although some of them had already unbuttoned most of their buttons, if not taken their shirts off all together. There were roughly thirty or so brothers in the room already, most of the brotherhood in attendance, as well as a similar number of girls from various houses. Stopping to give Pete head meant we were some of the last to arrive.

We mingled with everyone around. I tried my best to act like I hadn’t just been put up for suspension. I played it cool, doing my best to be as charming and nonchalant as possible.

At one point I noticed Pete talking to Amanda in the corner, leaning in and whispering things to each other. Part of me wanted to go over to her and clear the air, but I was tipsy, and the bigger part of me was nervous about how that would go.

I asked him later what they were talking about, and he simply said that she was concerned about him, and he reassured her that he and I were in a good place.

The start of our relationship, formally, couldn’t have gone any better, and we continued to solidify who and what we were.

The following week went by much like the last. Things with my brothers got much easier as the days went on, and as the following weekend approached, I had to do something I had been dreading since the trial.

That Friday night, just one night before Hell Week, and just one week before initiation, we were to hold the Big/Little Ball. It was the last event the upperclassmen would throw for the underclassmen before we headed into Hell Week. There was no pledgeship on Friday. The frosh were free to do what they pleased up until the ball, and then afterwards we would party together in the basement. No girls. Just us and the DJ. Around 11, the ball would open up and we’d go into a late night dance party. It was a Chi Beta tradition, and it was one of our biggest parties of the spring term, as it went later into the night than most other frat parties that weekend.

“What time do the pledges get here?” Roberto asked as we set up tables. We were forming one long united table in the center of the Great Hall for pledges and their bigs to eat side by side. There was already a buffet table at the bottom of the landing where our cook would be bring up food in a couple of hours.

“Seven,” Austin replied. As social chair, it was my job to pull the event together, so I’d roped my class into helping me set up. Ben and I draped purple table cloths over the main table. I had Hutch and Roberto folding napkins, and Austin was laying down candles after the tablecloths were draped.

I set one place setting, showed Ben how I wanted the wall decorations draped, and then excused myself for what I needed to do next. I felt confident they could handle the rest of the preparations, and told them I’d be back shortly to make sure it all looked good before the pledges arrived.

I went upstairs and grabbed a package I had bought earlier in the week from the student co-op, pulled on my Ralph Lauren puffer vest, and made the walk to the freshman dorms, where I was sure David was getting ready for the banquet. Or holing up to avoid it altogether.

I hadn’t said a single word to him since the trial. Not at the parties, not during the line-ups, and not in passing. I felt a boulder in my throat as I approached.

Part of me had spent the last two weeks waiting for a message from him saying that he’d quit the frat, but that message never came. And so as we got as close to the banquet as possible, I knew I had to break the ice and ensure that my little and I sat next to each other in front of the rest of the house. It was time to see exactly where we stood after the trial.

I found his room. I’d been there a few times when he and I were still doing our afternoon delights. I knocked on the familiar door.

I heard a shuffle, and a second later, the door opened.

“Hi,” I said meekly.

“Hey,” he looked surprised. He took a step back, but didn’t make way for me to come in. “What are you doing here?”

I swallowed and cleared my throat.

“Ummm… the Big/Little Banquet. It’s tonight.”

“I’m aware,” he replied.

“I just wanted to see if you plan on coming.”

He didn’t respond. He looked at me with a stare like none other I’d ever seen from anyone. I swallowed again.

“David.”

Nothing.

“Say something,” I implored. “Please.”

“You don’t want me,” he said softly. It was a resignation that struck me to my core like the sharpest knife. “You never did.”

It was my turn to be silent. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know what I could say. In his face I saw an innocence that I hadn’t dwelled on before. I had made this beautiful innocent boy my collateral damage.

“I’m sorry,” I said, matching his softness. A tear rolled down my face. “David, I’m so so sorry.”

He took another step back. This time there was space for me to enter, but I wasn’t sure if he wanted me to. I took a small step into his doorframe. I didn’t want to impose too much, but I wanted him to know that I meant what I said.

“You have to believe that I am truly sorry,” I said. “But David, if I didn’t do what I did, I could have been kicked out. And then you wouldn’t have a big at all.”

“I don’t have a big,” he shouted quickly, taking me back. “You are not a big. You are a… you are… you are the worst thing that’s happened to me. Ever.”

“David-”

“I trusted you. I relied on you and you weren’t there. Corbin, I…”

My heart broke into a million pieces as David broke down. He put his hands over his face and sunk his shoulders. He was taller than me, but somehow he fit right into my embrace. I stepped in and held him. He breathed heavy as he sobbed into my shoulder.

“David.” Was all I could say. I had no other words. I let him catch himself. It took a minute, but eventually he pulled back.

“I’ll go if you ask me to,” he said through strained breath. He wiped away the tears with an aggression that felt like something I would do. Upset at the world, but more upset at losing control.

“You don’t have to, but I would love it if you did,” I said. “I will earn you back, I promise. I don’t know how, but I will. I know it's hard, but you have to trust me.”

That’s when David looked me right in the eye and said something I still remember to this day. I remember the expression, the look in his eyes, the shape of his mouth.

“You can’t earn me back, Corbin. I’m in love with you, and you… you’re in love with yourself. You want a pawn, and I love you so much that I’ll be your pawn. I can’t quit the frat, I’ve come too far and I have pledge brothers who need me now. And I can’t quit you. I was going to lie for you. I’m running in circles for you to see me. And you see everyone else. You see everyone else besides me… even fucking Lee. My brother. You see him before you see me, and you tell me stupid shit like I don’t need you, or I can be like you. I don’t want to be! I don’t want to be like you. I want to be with you! I don’t want to use people. I don’t want pawns. I want love. And I thought… I thought if I could get you to see me… I could get you to love me… but you don’t. The only person Corbin Crowley loves is Corbin Crowley.”

David took a deep breath and turned so that his back was to me.

The words stung. They felt like he’d cut me open and poured poison directly onto my heart. Like he had twisted his knife over and over, creating a wound in me I couldn’t escape.

And yet as much as it hurt to hear, I had to acknowledge it was nothing compared to the hurt I’d caused him throughout all of this. All in the name of fraternity.

“David,” I finally spoke. “I have no idea what to say. I don’t… I don’t know what to tell you. I um… I just want to apologize.”

David didn’t say anything. He didn’t move.

“Look, we don’t have to go to the banquet. I want to prove to you that I care about you. Tell me how I can prove to you that I care about you.”

David turned slowly towards me. Again, he swatted the moisture from his face. He shook his head slowly, penetrating my gaze. He looked at me as if we’d just met for the first time. As if he was studying my face. My expression. My sincerity.

“David-” I started to say, but nothing came out. I simply mouthed the name and tried to forget what he had just said. The dagger he had just lodged in my heart. “Da-”

“Make love to me.”

It took me a second to comprehend what he had just said. After all of that, that was his response to me. He’d played this card before, when he saw me and Mike together. And to be fair, I had ripped his heart out a week ago. He had every right to go for the jugular and demand what he wanted once again.

But things had changed since then. It wasn’t just a casual weekend with Mike I’d be betraying. It was a full relationship. A boyfriend. A commitment like none other I’d had since I’d known David.

“What?”

“You heard me.” He took a step forward. It was my turn to study his face. All of a sudden it felt like David was someone I didn’t know or recognize. He was demanding something of me to stay in the house, as my little. It was manipulative, and it wasn’t the first time he had used my guilt to force my hand… my cock. What was real with this kid, I wondered. Were the tears? Was that speech?

“I have a boyfriend,” I countered slowly.

“I just poured my heart out to you. I want to feel something from you. Anything. That’s how you prove you want me to stay and go to this stupid banquet with you. As your little. Your accessory. Your pawn.”

He took another step forward so that we were barely separated by less than a few inches. I suddenly realized how tall he was. He’d gone from being my small little, curled up in my nook as he sobbed, to this man demanding something of me.

“I want to feel like you care for one night. Not just saying it. I want you to make me feel it… make me feel how much you care.” I started to respond. “Even if you just pretend, Corbin. I just want to feel.”

He reached out and pulled me in.

“I know it’s pathetic. Please. Just make me feel like you care for one night.”

My mind raced. It went from Pete to Mike to Lee to wondering if this was the only time David would try to entrap me like this. Was I in for a whole year of this kind of manipulation? Was having a little extort me worth having one at all? All of those things rang through my brain at once, and yet I didn’t have time to fully process any of those thoughts. David was right there, demanding what he wanted.

And I wanted to be a million miles away. I had other decisions to make, and David didn’t fit into the equation. And yet there he was, imposing himself into the calculus.

To buy a second, I put my hand on his chest. I created just a bit of separation, resting back on my right foot, standing firm, and pushing him slightly back with my left hand.

And then I decided. My first decision of the night. I made it, and executed it. I had a freshman trying to match me chess move for chess move, and so I decided how to handle it.

“Fine,” I said. “Take off your clothes.”

My voice was low, but firm.

“What?”

“You heard me,” I said, just above a whisper. I put the package I’d brought on the ground, turned and pushed his dorm room door shut. I turned back to him, circled so that I was standing next to his computer desk, in the center of the room.

“Take off your clothes,” I repeated, louder this time, but just as firm.

“Corbin, I-”

“This is a one time thing,” I added quickly. “So decide if you’re going to stick with what you just asked for, or if you’re going to change your mind. I’m committed to showing you I want you here. I didn’t fail at staying in the house, and I won’t fail at having you as my little. You. I’ll show you, David, if this is what you want. That I care about you. If a fuck before the banquet is what you want, then take off your clothes.”

I stood there and watched. David slowly called my bluff as he pulled his shirt over his head. He looked at me with a raised eyebrow wondering if I would stop him. He was testing me. We didn’t break eye contact as he undid his belt, and unbuttoned his pants. It was almost as if he was asking if I was sure without saying it. I held firm, assuring him I was perfectly certain.

He undid his belt, pulled his pants down, and as soon as they were around his ankles, I stepped forward and grasped his dick through the fabric of his boxer briefs.

As much as I felt I was committed to the decision between Pete and Mike, I couldn’t help but think about how hot David was. His chest was beautifully defined. His shoulders were broad. Smoking his first year away hadn’t damaged the swimmer’s body he came into college with one bit. He might have been a bit leaner than when I met him, but he was still one sexy young guy.

I held on to his dick through the thin fabric, feeling it grow in my grasp. I found his cock head with my thumb and began massaging. There was already a wet spot there, and I circled it slowly. I watched David’s eyes blink excruciatingly slowly. I had him.

“Before I get on my knees and pull your dick out,” I leaned in so that my lips were inches from his ear, and he could hear me whisper ever so quietly. “Let’s get something straight. I apologize for the things I said at trial. And I mean that. I will do this if it’s what you want. I mean that. I will make you feel as special as I can. I will do that for you, David.”

I pulled my hand back, and this time I plunged into his briefs and squeezed his cock hard. It was firmly rigid. Steel. I felt his entire body shudder. And then I took my other hand, and pulled his face so that he was facing me directly. No more slow blinking. I wasn’t the only one facing a decision.

“The person who is stroking your cock right now is about to be one of the most powerful people on campus. Do you realize that? Next year, I will sit on committees. I will play tennis with deans. I will run this campus like it’s on strings and I’m the puppetmaster,” I said softly but firmly. I continued to massage his dick. Every time his body tensed from the motion, I pulsed harder and pulled his face back to face me. “When I was a freshman, I was standing right where you are, about to initiate with Chi Beta, and now look at me.”

I squeezed his jaw and his cock at the same time. My gaze couldn’t have been more intense. I felt like my eyes were on fire looking deeply into his. I wanted him to see me. He wanted to feel. So here we were.

“I want you to look,” I continued, stroking him faster. “You said that I collect pawns. I do. I admit it. Look at me, David. I’m about to suck your dick because I want you to be my little bad enough to do it. My pawn. And to show you how bad I feel about what I did at the trial. But make no mistake. You are collecting your first pawn right here, right now.”

“Corbin…”

Before he had a chance to respond, I got down on my knees while pulling his dick out from his underwear. I was always so impressed with how hard he got. I took a deep breath and licked his cock. He sighed, rolled his head back, and then looked down at me.

“You don’t-”

“I don’t what?” I asked, looking up at him. We had a brief staredown. I took the head of his cock in my mouth, eliciting another moan.

I pulled back and decided to turn the screw on David, knowing he was at the point of no return. He had said those hurtful things, then blackmailed me, and here we were. But nothing he said was untrue. And so to make things right, and to teach him a lesson, I sucked on his cock firmly.

It was easy to push the action out of my head. In that moment there wasn’t a boyfriend or a cadet. There was just David and his decision to go through with this blackmail.

And so I sucked. I felt his cock pulse in my mouth. I took him further down my throat. It was almost clinical. I didn’t enjoy it, but I felt a need to do it. Not just to assure him, as he’d requested, but to prove the point that he was so afraid of. He had the capability to demand sex in repayment for my actions. We weren’t that dissimilar, him and I. And in my mind, that’s why he couldn’t quit me.

I pulled back when I felt his entire body tense under my grasp. I held firmly to his thighs, and looked up at him.

“Are you ready to collect your first pawn, David?” I asked. I could see in his face he was conflicted. Like he knew what he was doing, but he wasn’t sure I would actually do it, and that I’d turn the screw back on him.

He nodded slowly.

I plunged back on his dick, and within a second, he was shooting ropes of cum down my throat. I swallowed as if I was drinking a glass of milk in the morning. No passion. No desire Just a big servicing this fleeting little so that he wouldn’t actually flee.

I stood up and wiped my jaw.

“Congrats, David.”

“Corbin, I didn’t-” David started before I cut him off. I knew I had made him feel sufficiently guilty for what he’d done. Twice now. And even though his blackmail paled in comparison to what I had done to him, he needed to know I wasn’t the only manipulative one in this family.

“I got you something,” I walked over the package I had dropped on the ground. “For the banquet tonight. I’ll see you there at seven?”

David nodded.

“Good. Here.” I pulled a small box out of the bag and handed it to him. I could still sense the confusion on his face. He opened the navy blue box and pulled out two matching ties. They were both a dark green with polo horses on them. It was a cool pattern I’d picked out at the student store, and one I thought he might like. He examined them as he pulled them out, handing one to me.

“Thank you,” was all he said. I escaped his room, closed his door to let him get dressed. As soon as I was in the hallway, I took a deep breath, rested my head on the wall for a second, and then made the walk back to the frat house.

As I passed the ally that would have led me to Pete’s, I made a decision. I made a quick right into the alley, and walked back to Pete’s suite. I knocked. He answered, shirtless and drinking what looked like liquor out of a rocks glass. We didn’t have any plans to be together that night until he joined me at Chi Beta at 11, so the look of shock on his face was understandable.

“What are you doing here?” he asked.

“Setting up is going great,” I panted from the quick walk over. “I just wanted to come see you before the banquet.”

“Did things go well with David? When you took him the tie?”

Instead of answering, I gave Pete a kiss on the lips. He pulled back. I shook my head, pulling my hair out of my face. I wondered for a second if Pete tasted David on my breath, but when I looked him in the eye, I didn’t see that. That wasn’t why he pulled back. He felt tense to me.

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah,” he answered quickly. “Everything is great. I was just getting ready to Skype Dakota.”

I looked around and nothing seemed out of the ordinary. There wasn’t another guy in the room, and his laptop was open on the coffee table. It wasn’t on, but it seemed plausible that he had poured himself a drink to Skype her when I surprised him.

“Okay, well, I um… I’ll get out of your way, then.”

“Corbin,” Pete pulled me in for another kiss. I pulled back.

“I should get back to the house anyway. Finishing touches for the banquet. Tell Dakota I said hi, and I’ll see you in a few hours.”

“Of course, yes.”

I turned to the door trying not to feel paranoid about what had just happened. There was something that didn’t feel right, and it created a pit in my stomach. I was ready to make a decision about Pete and I, but for some reason, as I walked to the house, trying my best to believe that he was actually going to Skype his best friend in DC, something told me my decision about Pete and I had already been made for me.