Trash Polka - 7. Chapter 7

Tongues were weird. Especially when you were trying to mark them to stab a needle through. Having my hands in a stranger’s mouth this way was also a strange thing. Or, it would be, if I hadn’t done a million tongue piercings. Including my own. I hummed softly to myself while I got things ready and my current vic-patient sat patiently and chatted with the friend she’d brought along. I turned back and smiled softly when she took up a death grip on the other girl’s hand.

Normally, if someone was this nervous, I’d get them talking about something, pop the needle through when they weren’t paying attention, and finish while their brain was still catching up. That wasn’t really an option when the person couldn’t move their tongue. She was just going to have to brave it out unfortunately.

Luckily, she didn’t break her friend’s hand and she weathered the whole process far better than I thought she would. She made her way up front and I started cleaning up. My phone had vibrated earlier and I was really hoping no one would come in for a piercing. I left the phone face down on my workstation and went up front to get my customer checked out. Cameron’s eyes flicked to me and I grinned. With a cheerful, “Goodbye!” they were out the door. I could still feel Cameron’s eyes on me and I forced myself to meet them.

“Yes?”

“You’ve been on your phone a lot. What’s that about?” He asked, head tilting to the side a little as he studied me.

“Not any more than usual.” I said.

I shrugged and tried to give him an easy-going smile as those eyes poked at all my weak spots. His eyebrow hitched up and I knew I hadn’t fooled him. I wasn’t sure if it was his past or just how he was, but Cameron had an unnerving ability to read and see right through people. He would’ve been an excellent investigator or something equally as intimidating.

“You smile at it a lot too. As soon as your customers leave, you practically dive for the thing.” Cam said, gaze finally focusing on mine.

“Cameron, is smiling bad? Normally people think that’s a good thing and they’re happy about it.” I said, hoping my chuckle would hide my growing unease. I wasn’t doing anything wrong. I was allowed to keep personal things private, but not telling my friends things was a weird change. I was generally open about my life with them. I wasn’t counting on the confrontation coming so soon. I should’ve known better.

“Smiling isn’t bad, no, but you’ve been sulky lately and it suddenly changed overnight. You’re not on something are you?”

Relief flooded into me, followed closely by hurt. I was happy after being down and he automatically assumed I was on drugs. That was kind of a shitty conclusion to jump to. In all fairness, it was logical. I had been using more substances recently. I didn’t like that he thought I’d do it at work. That was unfair and he knew me better. I’d never jeopardize my reputation as an artist and I sure as hell wouldn’t put the shop’s reputation on the line. Again, I’d been getting into stuff and drugs were a slippery slope. Addiction was scary and maybe Cameron was just trying to catch something before it became a real problem.

“I’m not on anything and I wouldn’t come to work high.” I said. I was proud that I kept my voice level and left all the hurt out. No reason to get snippy with him and create an issue where one didn't need to exist.

He let out a sigh and nodded, “I didn’t think so, but you’ve not been yourself lately and I couldn’t think of another explanation. I’m sorry if that was a crappy thing to ask. I just want you to know if you ever need help, you can come to us. I know I’m bitchy, but I’d never judge you for something like that.”

I gave him a look and a smile slowly pulled at his lips, “I’d wait until you were clean and recovered and then I might judge you a little.”

I laughed and shoved lightly at his shoulder. As I made my way back to my room, I tried to decide when would be the best time to tell my friends that I’d met someone through my website and I’d talked to that person nearly every day for two weeks. They knew part of it. The rude customer bit, the crazy amount of money. Beyond that, I hadn’t mentioned anything else. I was hoping that if I didn’t, they’d all forget. Or at least, maybe they wouldn’t react as strongly.

I double checked my area. I’d cleaned everything and was set up if another customer wandered in. We were getting towards closing and I was hoping I’d be done. I had only done one quick walk in tattoo earlier and like six piercings after. Time had gone by, but I hated days where I didn’t get to pull ink on skin. It was a weird therapy for me. Stabbing people, while cathartic in its own way, just wasn’t as satisfying.

Once I had double checked that everything was squared away, I plopped into my chair and finally allowed myself to pick up my phone. Our conversations weren’t deep. There was a lot of flirting, teasing, and my constant attempts to rile him up. So far, this was perhaps the calmest man I’d ever encountered.

[K: As much as you run your mouth, I wouldn’t be surprised if you could skip a day of cardio each month.]

[R: You leave my mouth out of this. Don’t act like you don’t like it. Why else would you keep coming back?]

[K: I don’t have an answer for you, honestly. I have an odd fascination.]

[R: I am an odd fascination.]

[K: Shouldn’t you be working?]

[R: Shouldn’t YOU be working? Mr. Big Shot Business Guy.]

I smiled to myself and pushed some of the longer bits of my hair behind my ear. We hadn’t made it to the point where I thought I should have him elaborate on his work. To be honest, I wasn’t sure it really mattered. I knew enough to be content. He was in business. He was hot. I wanted him to blow my back out. Three simple things. What more did I need to know?

It hadn’t taken long to develop my own fascination with him. We hadn’t talked this much in person, just text, so it was hard to grasp context. I didn’t know if he was as into our stupid conversations as I was. I highly doubted the man snatched up his phone every time I messaged. In fact, I knew he didn’t. There were sometimes double-digit hours between messages. It didn’t bother me, but it did give me pause. It was unlike me to dive headfirst into things. I needed to remind myself that arm’s length was where I was most comfortable.

The clock ticked down and after the first five minutes, I put my phone down. There might not be anyone walking in, but that didn’t mean I was out of things to do. Lucas wanted us both to make fresh flash sheets for a day long sale and I hadn’t even started. So, instead of staring at my cellular device, I got to work. There was a general theme. That was the first thing I needed to figure out. We were coming up on a Friday the 13th. Hence the sale. There was a lot I could do with that. The issue was they needed to be small, simple designs that would look cool and be easy for me to bang out quickly.

It was quiet for a long time while my tablet and I worked to cobble together some designs I’d still be proud to put my name on. I registered a noise by my hand, but it faded quickly. Everything around me did. It was just me and my little screen now. My brain had whittled my awareness down to the smallest point it could. I sketched, erased, and repeated until my concentration was broken forcibly.

Fingers gripped my shoulder and I nearly jumped out of my skin, “Hey sorry man! I just wanted to tell you that it’s an hour past closing and we’re going to go upstairs. You staying or?”

I squinted at Lucas for a moment while my brain buffered. It always took me a couple seconds when I was brought out of my zones to perceive the world around me again. A few more seconds after that and I’d understand what was happening and my place in it. Right. Shop was closed. Lucas and Cameron were going to go upstairs to their apartment above the shop. Got it.

I shook my head, “Naw, I’m beat. I just got too into this.”

“Oh awesome, is that what you’re going to offer for the sale? I’ll give it to Cameron for when he makes the social media post. Those are rad!” Lucas grinned and I smiled softly at him.

Everything seemed to occur to me at once. My body hurt as per usual, it was past going home time, and I had tomorrow off. More pictures would be posted and the thought of being a slug all day in sweats sounded amazing. I shifted in my seat before standing to plug in my tablet and stretching.

“Not staying?” Lucas asked, “Either way, we’ll let you close up. I did a twelve hour session. My back’s killing me and husband dearest has announced he’s hungry so I’ve got like twenty minutes before he turns into a monster.”

I laughed, “Let’s go. No one wants to deal with a hangry Cameron.”

Why did life seem to take longer when you were looking forward to something? Traffic was ridiculous and then I still had to take out my contacts and change for bed. All I wanted was to crawl under my covers and pass out. Then I would do as little as possible tomorrow while people paid me to be pretty. I was also anxious because I’d finally got around to posting the new pictures I’d taken with August. We’d put a lot of work and thought into them. I was nervous to see how they’d be received.

Poor Alec had taken much longer than he thought doing the editing. While we’d taken pictures in a way that would keep Auggie’s face out of them, he had a couple tattoos that were easily recognizable. Alec was by no means a photo editing pro, but I hadn’t found anything yet that he couldn’t figure out on a computer if given enough time. I was proud of how they’d turned out. I was sure they would be popular, but nevertheless, a flare of insecurity and uncertainty had made itself known. Work had helped me to pull my focus from it, but now I didn’t have the distraction.

I took out my contacts, dropping them in their container before moving on to wash my face. It seemed like it all took an eternity, but then I was in my bed. Face down, in the softest sweatpants I owned. Finally, it was time to wind down. I rolled over and let my fingers skim the floating shelf above my head. There were three tiers of them and they were wrapped around the perimeter of my bedroom. Filled with books, trinkets, plants, and flameless candles, they brought me a sense of calm. My eyes followed the plant bridging one shelf to the next. Pretty soon, I was going to run out of room for it to creep across the wall.

I rolled onto my side and tapped my phone screen, narrowing my eyes at the bright device. I’d gone a surprising amount of time without looking at it and I was proud of that. I needed to distance myself from the urge to pounce on the thing every time it vibrated. It was pathetic. I had started acting like a school aged kid with their first crush. Unacceptable. A certain level of aloofness was expected when you led relationships the way I did. Well, not really relationships. Anti relationships?

[K: I was working. You should be done now, yes?]

[R: Keeping track of my schedule now? Creep.]

To my delight, he actually replied right away.

[K: It’s almost the same every day. Makes it pretty simple. Are you busy?]

My brow furrowed and I looked down at my phone. This was new. We texted whenever we had free time. It was the unspoken agreement when we’d started this. I wasn’t sure why. Maybe Kenji was just as nervous that this would be weird as I was? Either way, I had a choice to make. This was definitely going to change things. However small that change may be.

[R: No, I got home and got ready for bed. Exciting, I know😉]

[K: I see.]

I blinked. That was it. Just, “I see.” I frowned and rolled back, holding the phone above my face. I wasn’t sure if he meant to elaborate or if I’d failed some kind of weird test.

[R: ??]

[K: Sorry. I asked because I was wondering if you were out. You’ve been to Xi before.]

I was frowning again. Xi. The club that August took me to the last time he was in town. I’d only been there a couple times and I remembered seeing Kenji across the room. At the time, I thought it was impossible for him to see me there. He never once looked in my direction when he was moving through the building to get upstairs. Unless he’d seen me when he’d been in one of the rooms. There had been that person staring down from the windows…

[R: How do you know I’ve been there?]

[K: I saw you there. Along with a man who looked like he’d stuck his finger in a light socket.]

[R: Don’t make fun of him. He’s one of my favorite people. You’re just jealous. Not a good look.]

I crawled up the bed and grumbled to myself about Kenji. Not everyone could live in suits. Snuggling under my covers, I glanced down at my sweatpants. I wondered if Kenji even owned a pair. Admittedly, August’s style wasn’t for everyone. It was a bit out there, but so was Auggie. So was I. It’s why we got along. He was one of the only people I knew other than myself who was willing to take fashion risks. Also, in Kenji’s defense, sometimes the combination of August and me was way too much for even the most tolerant people. Even our friends. I loved it.

[K: Oh? I wonder what one must endure to become one of your favorite people? I’ve a newfound respect for him. He’s obviously suffered.]

[R: And you say I’m the brat.]

Scoffing, I brushed my hair out of my face and reached over my head to grab at the tiny remote on the shelf above me. I grabbed it, turned off the main light in the bedroom and pressed the button to turn on my flameless candles. I was so comfortable and soon, I don’t even know if the allure of flirting with Kenji would be enough to keep me awake.

[K: And you are.]

[K: I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to insult your friend. Or your date. Whatever he was. I just happened to notice you. Hard not to with the hair…and the rest of you.]

[R: Should I be insulted?]

[K: No. You’re nearly ethereal. Even while-clearly-drunk.]

I grinned and looked up at my books. What to address first? I wasn’t sure how invested he was but it did seem like he was not so subtly trying to figure out what was going on between August and me. Which, nothing, but we had gone out alone together. From the outside looking in, it very much could have looked like a date. Especially with how close August and I got.

I didn’t have a shortage of people telling me I was attractive. It didn’t normally faze me, but when Kenji said something. There was…some fazing happening. It helped that he was also ridiculously nice to look at. Sue me, I liked having pretty people tell me I was attractive. Ethereal was a new one too. I was on board. I supported that message.

[R: Oh, look at you being downright sweet. Did it hurt? You gonna be alright?]

[K: You LOOK ethereal. Then your personality gets in there and ruins the illusion.]

[R: Ass.]

[K: Brat.]

[R: Shouldn’t you be asleep? Don’t businesspeople get up stupid early.]

[K: I get up when I choose to. Which, yes, is rather early for some.]

[R: Isn’t it bedtime then?]

[K: Shouldn’t you be sleeping?]

[R: Go tell someone else what to do.]

[K: It’s morning where I am. I will. They won’t be quite as pretty or have banter nearly as stimulating. In fact, they better not.]

[R: So many compliments tonight. Did you start your morning with alcohol? You’d have to be inebriated to suddenly be so nice.]

[K: I sent you $5000. Rarely gets nicer than that, but I suppose I could put forth more effort. How much would it take to get you to be sweet?]

I rolled my eyes and fought off the smile that’d been stretched across my face for the entirety of the conversation. It was different. There’d always been an underlying tension, but now it was pulled taut and I didn’t know what would happen if it snapped. We’d only ever texted. Sure, we’d met in person, but I barely counted that.

[R: How much effort or money? I don’t think you could afford to pay me to be sweet. That’s not a service I offer.]

[K: To be honest, I had hoped to get past that part. I’d like for this to move on from me paying you for things.]

I blinked and slowly sat up. I wasn’t used to people being so direct and it was refreshing. People often tried to sugar coat things or tip toe around the truth to save feelings. Whether it be someone else’s or their own. I shouldn’t be surprised. He’d never seemed like that type. However, where I’d been nervous about how to shift the nature of our relationship, he’d cut to the chase.

The only problem now was, where did I want this to go? I didn’t peg him as a relationship guy. I hoped not anyway. With how often he was flying all over creation, I couldn’t imagine the logistics of trying to nail him down. I didn’t want to imagine it and I didn’t want to do it either. He was still a stranger. I was getting ahead of myself.

[R: What is it that you want then?]

I let myself fall back against my pillows and looked up at the stars painted across my ceiling. I’d done some of the constellations, but now looking at it, I wished I hadn’t. I mentally added my ceiling back to the “Things I needed to throw paint at” list. The list was never ending and my house paint budget was not growing with it.

[K: To be upfront, I don’t do monogamous relationships.]

[R: Fantastic. Me either.]

[K: I have, on occasion, signed contracts for engaging in a specific lifestyle.]

[R: Like…kink? Fetish?]

[K: Specifically, Dom/sub. However, it’s not something I have to have if you’re not interested.]

[R: I’ve never done it. I don’t even know what it entails. I would be interested in…getting to know you better though. Can never have to many friends.😘]

[K: Perhaps it’s something we should discuss further. Either over the phone or in person. In person may take some time. I’m tied up in Korea at the moment.]

[R: I assumed I’d be the one tied up. 🧐]