Incandescence - 14. Struggle

My processing skills weren’t cooperating. I couldn’t say how long we stayed there, crouched, or sitting on the ground. We all seemed to be suspended in shock. How could this have happened? Of all my friends, Wren was the one I worried about the least. I never thought he’d be the one we lost. I rested my face in Talon’s neck as I sucked in a breath. My brain couldn’t accept these pieces together. They didn’t fit. Jagged edges butted up against smooth spaces and vice versa. Worst of all, I didn’t have just my emotions to weather. Talon was struggling to keep his to himself. The tether was a storm of grief, disbelief, and anger.

Movement behind me drew my attention and I turned. Eon had gathered Wren into his arms and was pushing himself up to stand. His face was blank and he turned to Loren, “How much of their poison distribution network were you able to destroy?”

Loren blinked up at him, clearly as surprised as I was by my brother’s shift in demeanor, “Uh, we destroyed everything we could find. We obviously were only as good as our information. That was hard to come by once we’d crossed the border. The last target…where we failed…was the last one of which we were aware.”

Eon nodded slowly, “The last one, how fast was its production? How much of a disadvantage will it create for us?”

Loren cringed a little, “It was the biggest one. Also, the most well-hidden.”

“The most well-guarded too apparently,” Talon muttered.

“We’ll need to hold a meeting. The Council should be informed. Not that it will matter.” Eon said as he turned and walked away.

“You going to walk through town like that?” Talon asked as he untangled himself from me and stood.

Eon didn’t stop, “I’m going to do whatever I want Verloren.”

I tensed as Talon did, “I know you like to forget but I did marry your brother. You were there. Stop being a stubborn jackass.”

Eon turned with a snarl as Talon strode forward, Magik already building around him. Talon gripped Eon’s bicep and then they were gone. I swiped my forearm across my eyes and let out a shaky sigh. I finally noticed the chill. There was a light breeze. It was enough to make me cold. I hadn’t thought about putting on more clothes. Talon’s panic had made mine rise and I had come here right away.

Wrapping my arms around myself as I stood, I glanced to my other friends. Hanja’s eyes were wide in shock as he helped Tyren up. My poor former teacher’s eyes were red and the skin around them was puffy. Hanja used his sleeve to dry Tyren’s cheeks and I glanced to the side. At Loren. His face was grim as he stared down at his blood smeared hands. Lyme stood off to the side, looking unsure and uncomfortable.

I faced the wall and the city beyond. The past few days had dramatically changed things. I’d assassinated a monarch and we’d lost one of our strongest allies to handicap another enemy. Where did we go from here?

*Talon*

As soon as our feet touched down in Wren and Eon’s manor-or just Eon’s I guess-flames licked at the bottom of my tunic. Eon laid Wren’s body on a day bed by the fountain and then he turned towards me, cracking his knuckles. He glared across the small distance separating us and I squared my shoulders. Blue flame ignited in Eon’s palms and slowly covered his hands.

“I’ve had enough of you.” He growled, flames making his blue eyes light unnervingly.

“Good. The feeling’s mutual. I forgave you when Kalian and I grew closer. I did it for him, but now you act like a victim. Like I’m the only one that’s hurt someone.” I snapped. I didn’t call my own Magik. I’d hold out if I could. If we fought-no matter the outcome-and Kalian found out, there’d be another altercation.

“I’ve never claimed that I haven’t hurt anyone. I told Kalian what Mallex and I did to you. You nearly killed Wren, Kalian, and I.” Eon said, fire building.

I laughed bitterly, “Oh yes, that’s always your go to. That I hurt people when I wasn’t myself. When I didn’t have control. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve hurt people by choice, but never those I care about. No matter how many times I’ve wanted to put you down. You and Mallex had no outside influence. You were children when you decided to torture me. Did you tell him how you helped Mallex lure me away from safety by using our past friendship? The one that I didn’t even know had ended? Poor, stupid, little Talon. How could I have friends. What was I thinking?”

Eon’s eyes dipped to the floor and I watched him swallow, “You’re right. What Mallex and I did was unforgivable, but so was giving in to whatever took control of you.”

“Correct. Forgive me oh great General. My partner had been taken, tortured, and then almost had his soul ripped out. I was a little upset. I will try to manage my intense fear better next time.” Eon’s expression hardened again as I let every ounce of sarcasm in my body drip into my words.

“Kalian is my brother too. You think you’re the only one who was scared?”

I smirked at him, crossing my arms over my chest, “Yeah, and you were the best big brother in the world. Weren’t you? You supported him, guided him to adulthood, and protected him. Oh…wait.”

The flames surrounding his hands wavered a bit, “You’ve been perfect from the start of your relationship with him too. I’m not the only guilty one here.”

Laughing again, I shook my head, “Eon, no one is aware of my flaws and mistakes as much as I am. I’ve been beating myself up for them my entire life. We have a common source of comfort and healing. Kalian has never looked at either of us without love or compassion. You’ve needed it as much as I have. He’s forgiven both of us, but we’ll probably never forgive ourselves or each other. We’re family now. No matter how much you wish we weren’t.”

His hands went limp by his sides. His flames went out and his head dropped, “I don’t know what to do. About any of this. Illiath, Serran, Dleth, Kalian, you, and the Council. I’ve never been in control of my life and I’ve been deluding myself. I couldn’t even keep the people closest to me safe.”

Startled into silence, I could only look at him. It was rare that I related to Eon. I actively tried not to. His shoulders were low and I was unable to see his face. In the last month, I’d seen more emotion from my brother-in-law than I had in my entire time knowing him. I watched tears drip to the floor under him and my eyes widened. I should have brought Kalian. He was far better at dealing with feelings. Well, other than his own. Did Eon…need a hug? A swift kick to the face to knock his shit back together? I didn’t know.

I glanced to where Wren lay behind him and closed my eyes, “Y-you don’t have to do it all alone you know. None of us do. That’s why we have our weird little family. I may not want to help you. In fact, I really hate your face sometimes, but I’d do anything Kalian wanted. We’ll figure this out Eon.”

“What about Wren?” He asked, voice raspy and rough.

“I don’t know. I do know if there’s a way to bring him back, our band of freaks will figure it out.” I slid my fingers up my neck and rubbed the back of it before linking them behind it, “Your little brother is tenacious. He’s done some amazing things.”

Eon coughed and chuckled quietly, “He keeps you in line, doesn’t he?”

“That he does. Let me tell you, the things he does to keep me in line. Mm.” I smirked and watched him wipe his forearm across his face, letting out a shaky breath.

“Leave. Please.” He sent me a weak glare as Eon finally lifted his head, meeting my eyes. His face was dry and I had a tough time seeing any traces of the emotion he’d just been displaying.

“Gladly. I can’t deal with any more of your outrageous, dramatic feelings. Please do try to tone it down next time. Or find Kalian. He loves being a shoulder to cry on.”

The corner of his lips quirked up and his features softened, “I’ll try to control myself.”

“Thank the gods. You should really try to achieve my level of stability and emotional strength.”

Eon laughed. Actually laughed. A broad smile that lit his entire face. It made me uncomfortable. He shook his head and then as fast as the humor came, it disappeared when he glanced over his shoulder. With one last look at Wren and then Eon, I jumped home.

“Dad!” I saw a flash of black and stiffened when Wyn’s body collided with mine. Sometimes I forgot he was nearing Kalian’s height, “Da’s not here. I went to check and the bed was empty! What’s going on?”

Right. Wyn didn’t know. He didn’t know anything that had transpired today. Kalian was missing when he was still supposed to be unconscious in bed. He didn’t know I’d called for him. I’d woken Kalian up when I shouldn’t have been able to. He didn’t know…Wyn didn’t know about Wren. I took a deep breath and held him tighter to me. Wyn’s dark head fell back so that he could look up at me. His nose scrunched and I memorized every freckle across the bridge of his small nose, the rainbow of color spreading from his pupil, and the bottle green underneath. His hair was curled around his chin and his eyes narrowed as he looked up at me. This child was trouble. Far too perceptive for his own good.

“Dad, what’s wrong?”

Sighing softly, I rubbed my fingers up and down his back, “Your da is fine Wyn, but I have to tell you something.”

Wyn squirmed, nose scrunching at the physical contact he deemed himself too old for, “What is it?”

There were different ways I might handle this. My default, even with my adopted child, was blunt honesty. I could try to channel some of Kalian’s gentle techniques, but would it help? Would it do any good to sugarcoat this for Wyn? I didn’t know and I didn’t have time to consult Kalian over the tether. Not with Wyn’s suspicious eyes still staring up at me, waiting.

“Your uncle, Wyn.” I took another deep breath, “Wren- “

“Is he home?! Is Uncle Wren home? I’ve missed him! He’s been gone so long!” Wyn’s face broke into a beaming smile and I wanted to die. I was going to ruin it. It would shatter as soon as I delivered the news and that was awful.

“Love, he’s not…Wren is…Your uncle is…” I was struggling. I was stronger than this. I’d been an assassin. I’d been through the worst of the worst. This wasn’t the first time I’d had to break news like this. Looking down at Wyn, though, my strength crumbled. Even breathing became difficult, let alone speaking.

“I don’t understand. He always comes to see me first thing when he’s home. Even before Uncle Eon.” His smile dropped and his fingers tightened in my tunic.

“He’s not coming Wyn. Wren is gone.”

Wyn’s face shifted to confused but I saw his eyes starting to get glassy, “What do you mean? Did he go on another mission?”

I sucked in breath, running both hands down his back now. The motion was mutually comforting and it let me concentrate on something other than the tears building in his eyes. I cleared my throat and let my chin rest on the top of his head, “He’s gone Wyn. He’s not on a mission. He’s…he’s dead.”

The collapse was immediate. The hands in my tunic tightened and Wyn’s breath started coming in short, panicked breaths. He clung to me and I felt moisture land on my tunic and hit the deep neckline-exposed part of my chest.

“No! That’s not funny! You’re lying!” He pulled back suddenly, face tear stained and angry, “It’s not funny dad! Tell me where he went! Right now!”

“Wyn, I’m not lying.”

“Yes, you are.” He wailed. The tears started in earnest now and Wyn’s hands came up to cover his face. His shoulders shook and his sobs broke something in me. I’d been staying strong. I had to. Everyone else was falling apart. Wyn had managed to forced emotions out of me in the same way his other adoptive father had. He’d now managed to drag up my grief with his own. I wrapped my arms back around him and held him tight to my chest as my eyes burned and he gave into his pain.

*Kalian*

It took me far too long to get back to the house. Loren came with me, his torn up and bloody jacket draped over my shoulders. It didn’t protect me from the elements but it helped a little. I hoped Eon and Talon weren’t killing each other. I was exhausted, though. There was so much that needed to be addressed, but I wanted to crawl into bed instead. The walk home had taken almost everything I had left.

“Loren, are you okay?”

“I’m alive, I guess.” Loren threw a lopsided grin my way. There was something troubling about it when you added it to the torn, bloody clothes and the mud caked boots. There was dirt smeared over his chest and arms. His face too. I couldn’t imagine what he’d been through.

“But are you okay? Amaris and then this.” I looked over at him as we trudged along. As tired as I was, I didn’t know how Loren was still standing.

“Amaris needed to leave. We weren’t right. I wasn’t what she wanted and she knew I’d never do what was best for me. She did what was right for both of us. Wren did too. He got me out and he kept us both safe until he couldn’t. Seems I can’t make good decisions by myself.”

I stopped and Loren’s head tilted toward me, his expression uneasy, “You protected him too, Loren.”

“I did an excellent job, huh? He’s dead.” Another empty smile.

“You brought him home. You brought him back to Eon and the rest of us.” I stepped forward, resting my hand on his shoulder.

Loren brushed his messy hair away from his face and smirked, “This when you tell me you’ve secretly been in love with me for all these years? I’m sorry, gorgeous, my attention’s been pulled elsewhere. You took too long.”

I shoved his shoulder and shook my head, “That must be some kind of record. You were serious for almost an entire conversation.”

“What can I say? Near death experiences really force things into perspective.”

“Funny what a crazy, gray haired, Dlethian can do to shift your priorities, huh?”

Loren laughed, “Too true, Kalian.”

I smiled at him and it did a little to alleviate some of the grief gripping my heart. We were getting closer to home and I wondered if Tyren, Hanja, and Eon were okay. I knew they weren’t, but I hoped that they’d at least be able to process their sadness safely. Even though it seemed like we had no time to. Eon was who worried me the most. For obvious reasons. He’d lock his emotions away again. He’d already done it, jumping back to business after he’d let himself break down for only a few minutes. He’d listened to Loren’s report while holding his partner’s body. I shuddered and tried to figure out the best way to comfort everyone. We had to weather this and then turn to the other issues barreling down on us.

We’d reached the house and Loren opened the door for me. It was quiet. Far too quiet. I expected Wyn to be waiting for us. I at least expected to hear him in the house. I stepped inside and Loren climbed the stairs to the room he’d been in since he’d returned to Syrin. I moved after him. Maybe Wyn was in his room? I walked down the hallway and the door after Wyn’s opened down the hall.

Amaris came out. She’d obviously been crying as she ran to me, throwing her arms around my neck. Mine went around her waist and I held her as she fell apart, “I can’t believe it. When Talon told us…Oh gods Kallie!”

I froze. Talon was already here. He’d told everyone. It felt like ice slipped into my veins. Wyn. He had to have told our son. Of course, I wanted to comfort Amaris, but I was getting impatient now. I needed to make sure he was okay. I let her get it out and I could hear her trying to get herself under control.

“Go check on Wyn. I didn’t mean to get in the way.” She stepped back and smiled weakly at me, her fingers brushing tears off her cheeks.

“You didn’t.” I held her face gently, kissing her forehead.

I stepped around her and heard her following. I wasn’t sure what I would find as I approached the door. Amaris continued behind me, returning to her room, I heard her door close and turned my attention back to the room in front of me. I twisted the knob and pushed the door open slowly. My entire body relaxed when I laid my eyes on my husband and son. Talon was wrapped around Wyn on the bed-that was far too small for him-as they slept. As I stepped closer, I frowned at some burnt edges on his clothing. Talon seemed to be uninjured at least. Wyn’s face was flushed and there was evidence that yet another person had been crying today. I ran my fingers through Talon’s dark hair, letting the gray strands slip through my fingers. He stirred and rolled slightly, looking up at me blearily.

“Hey, love.” I whispered and he rolled more. Now he was on his back, a single arm wrapped around Wyn as I crawled up to lay on his chest.

“How are you holding up?” Talon asked as he rested his chin on top of my head. I snuggled into him and pressed my nose into the column of his throat.

“It hurts. A lot. Everyone is hurting and I don’t know how to fix it. I wish I were stronger. I wish I hadn’t used up all my power. Maybe if I hadn’t lost my mind, I could’ve done more. I could’ve saved him or brought him back.” I forced tears down and clung to Talon.

“It’s not your job to fix it for everyone. We’ve been over this love. You aren’t responsible for everyone else. There’s no way you could have known what was going on with Loren and Wren. You tried. That’s all you could do. Sumerion deserved what he got. Was it at the best time? No, but I don’t grieve him and I doubt there’s anyone who does.” Talon murmured into my hair.

“I made everything harder for everyone.” I sighed as I ran my fingers over Wyn’s cheek gently.

“That seems to be a habit of ours.” Talon said, readjusting to let his feet hang over the edge of the bed. I rubbed my head against his shoulder and let my head rest lower on his chest. When I did, I noticed green eyes streaked with color staring at me. Talon seemed to notice he was awake at the same time, and his head turned to kiss his forehead.

“Da, is Uncle Wren really gone?” His voice was small and his eyes were wide. I wanted to tell him anything but the truth. I wanted to make it all better, but I couldn’t. There was no way for me to reduce the severity of the situation for anyone around me. We’d lost someone close to us. That was it. That was the reality. We would all have to work through it in our own way and support each other. We were a family, however dysfunctional it seemed from the outside. No matter how unorthodox, we cared about each other. So, we would grieve our loss together.

“I’m sorry Wyn.” I said as I leaned forward to cup his cheek gently.

“Why didn’t you bring him back? Dad said you brought an entire room full of people back once. Why not Uncle Wren?” His voice was strained and beginning to build in volume. His questions sank into me, latching onto my own insecurities. He’d voiced the very things I had. The things I’d been beating myself up over.

“I wasn’t strong enough. I’m sorry.” I closed my eyes and felt movement. A forehead rested against mine and a hand stroked down the back of my head and my nape. I opened my eyes and saw Wyn close, Talon’s other hand soothing him in the same way. I nuzzled my nose against my son’s, “I will do whatever I can to bring him back and make sure we never lose anyone else.”

“Promise?” Wyn’s voice was still sad, but it’d grown stronger since the first time he’d spoken to me.

“Promise.”

Wyn and Talon both slept heavy. They were both worn out from the day. I couldn’t settle. I lay there, surrounded by immediate family, and rolled everything over in my head. Wren was gone. Him and Loren had managed to do a lot of good in Serran, but there was no telling how much poison they had left. It was very possible that they had more areas set up to make it. That was still an issue. Loren had also mentioned that the Verseckt that had accompanied them where simply gone one morning. If I knew Wren, he had something up his sleeve. He always did. It was exceedingly rare that anyone was privy to his entire hand of cards. He kept many close to his chest and I was sure there were several hidden completely. Things we didn’t even consider. This wasn’t his first war. It wasn’t his first mission. There was no way he didn’t have some form of backup plan if something happened to him. More issues.

Dleth was an unknown. I had no doubt that Lyrah could lead. The problem was whether the court and people gave her a chance. She was a Magik user and a woman. I doubted that Dleth was progressive enough to have had a female ruler and she possessed the one thing they hated most. There was also no telling how helpful Suman would be. I liked the man. He’d grown on me in the same way Loren had. He wasn’t a great ally, however. He told us only what he thought we needed to know. If we were going to continue putting faith in him, we didn’t have time for games. The next time he played one, I wasn’t sure I would stop Eon. Talon might not even help his cousin. I’d seen the aftermath when Talon had figured out exactly why the fight had started.

I sighed as I carefully maneuvered myself out of Talon’s arm. I flinched as dark eyes opened slowly and he mumbled sleepily, “What are you doing?”

“I can’t sleep. I’ll be in the library if you need me.” He frowned at me, but then yawned and stretched. I crept toward the door and began closing it, trying not to make any noise. I looked one last time through the crack and paused. Talon had rolled. His back was to the door and Wyn had curled into his body. I rubbed my chest and shook myself mentally as I got choked up. When the door clicked shut, I paused once again. I snuck down the hallway, easing open the next door. Amaris blinked up at me, not entirely awake.

“Sleep.” I whispered, she smiled sleepily, and her eyes slid closed.

Next, I went the opposite way, passing Suman’s empty room on the other side of Wyn’s. The other hall was shorter and only had two bedrooms. I frowned softly as I saw the door partially open with dim light spilling out into the hall. I looked through the already present opening and frowned. Loren was sitting against the headboard, head hanging forward as his hands lay in his lap. He was shirtless and wearing his ruined pants from earlier. At least he’d cleaned up a bit and wasn’t wearing his mud-caked boots. I slid inside, clicking off the light and almost losing my arm for my effort.

“Kalian?” Loren gasped, eyes wide and scared. He released me immediately and I rubbed my wrist.

“Sorry, I was getting the light. You should lay down Loren. You’re not young anymore. That’s going to kill your neck.”

“Yes mother.” He chuckled.

“Don’t make me tell Potlyne.” I pointed at him and glared. Loren scooted down in bed, throwing the covers over himself and rolling to face away from me.

I shook my head, smiling softly as I left the room, shutting the door fully behind me. I made my way down the stairs and to the library. I wandered around the high, filled shelves. There was a book on symbols that I had stolen from the safehouse in Dleth. It seemed like forever ago. I held it in my arms and moved down the line. I had a few books on the dead languages and I even found a couple on Serran and Dleth. Unfortunately, there was nothing about Illiath. I frowned as I set all the books on the desk in the room. I cleared away a mess of papers I had been neglecting for far too long and stared at the stack.

I wish I were like Lyme. I wish I could devour a book and have all its secrets committed to memory. Sighing, I flipped open the first book and began to read. Reading had a funny way of making time fly by. I wasn’t retaining every word, more like skimming until I found something of interest.

The differences between Dleth and Dimian had started long ago. It seemed to have started over the pettiest of things. Someone said something that was taken wrong, jealousy, things of that nature. The violence was more recent. It’d started with an overzealous Diminese king who thought his country superior for its possession of Magik. He’d started the blood feud that’d last for over two hundred years now. Dleth was a proud country. They wouldn’t bow down simply because someone told them to. Hence, the…tension.

I shook my head and set another book to the side, slipping my fingers over the small book of symbols. I’d stolen an alchemy book too, but that was in Talon’s room. We had never managed to find time for him to teach me the way he wanted. As far as I knew, there were few that had Talon’s alchemy knowledge due to the prejudice against it.

The symbols ran the gambit. Some I recognized; some I had never seen before. A lot of the small book was hard to read, the writing smeared and pages torn out in some places. I sighed and threw it aside, running fingers through my messy hair. Standing, I left the room and shouldered open the door to Talon’s alchemy room. The walls were black because what other color would they be? The floor was the marble so prominent in the rest of Syrin. There were shelves filling one wall with bottles and vials, all labeled meticulously. Another wall held plants and a sink to wash up whatever Talon got up to in here. The final wall was filled with books, their spines turned inward for some reason. His books never used to be that way, but slowly over time, all his bookcases shifted to match his new habit. I had no idea the reason behind it and I hadn’t found time to ask.

The room had become a bit wilder since he’d left the Verseckt. The table in the center had tiny explosions of bright color all over and the plants along the wall had grown quite a bit since I’d last seen them. Including the tiny one on the very end that had scrawling writing on it from when Wyn was still little and struggling with writing. That one’s pot had fingerprints of every color smeared across it and Talon had kept the poor plant alive for years now. I was almost positive it was a weed, but Talon had displayed it proudly when Wyn had presented it to him. A smile spread across my face at the memory. I’d been dying in the middle of paperwork when they’d stolen me away to show off Wyn’s contribution to the alchemy room. Talon had announced it and set it on the shelf with all the dramatic ceremony he could muster. Wyn had beamed and nodded smugly, clearly proud of himself. I had cried like a baby later when I was alone.

I stepped forward, trailing my fingers over the neat stakes in each plant. Each announced the official name and more common one in Talon’s handwriting. There were bottles in the nearby sink. Some filled with water and murky substances, others tilted on their sides half cleaned out. I rolled my eyes and smiled to myself. Talon was brilliant, but his mind sometimes jumped from one thing to the next. He didn’t have time to clean. I turned the water on, rummaging around until I found a cloth and something that I hoped was washing soap. I cleaned up the bottles and sink. I dried them, placing them neatly to the side and then rubbing the dry towel over my hands.

“I was going to get to those.” I clamped my hand over my mouth to stifle a startled cry as I whipped around. Talon was sitting on the table, grinning at me.

“Do you have to do that?” I snapped.

“After all these years, it’s still funny, so yes. Have to.” He smirked and hopped off the table, crowding into my space, “Tell me, love. Do you sleep at all now? Your poor desk is a mess and now I find you cleaning in my alchemy room. You never come in here.”

I looked up at him and sighed, “I sleep.”

Talon leaned forward, trapping me against the counter. He nuzzled my neck and the tip of his nose slid up as he placed a kiss behind his ear. My eyelids fluttered closed as he whispered, “You need to sleep. I have several ways to make rational thought impossible for you. Just say the words love. Wyn is out.”

I slid my hand up, tangling my fingers in his hair as I pulled him to kiss me. His fingers caressed gently over my cheek before cupping it and angling my head the way he wanted. My free hand fisted in his tunic and I barely reacted when his arms dropped and then lifted me onto the counter. He stepped closer, tongue sweeping over mine. I wrapped my legs around his waist and held his shoulders as things became more heated. He broke the kiss to suck at my neck and I let out a soft sigh as his teeth grazed my skin.

Our bodies seemed to want comfort, but I didn’t think either of us were ready for sex after the days we’d had recently. Talon’s mouth moved back up to mine and the kisses switched from needy and desperate to sweet and slow. We parted and I hooked my chin over his shoulder, clinging to him like a baby. Our breathing evened out and I closed my eyes as we held each other.

“I was trying to find anything I could to help.” I whispered.

“With what specifically?” He asked, kissing the side of my head.

“Anything. Everything. I don’t know what to do and I tried lining up all the things stacked against in my head, but there are so many.” I gripped Talon’s tunic tighter, bunching the fabric between my fingers.

“One at a time. Break them down to the simplest thing we can tackle right now. As they get bigger and more difficult, we’ll already be able to look back and see the things we beat that we never thought we could when we started.” Talon murmured into my hair.

I tilted my head to rub against his shoulder, “How are you so smart?”

“I believe that I informed you multiple times, early on in our relationship, that I am incredible and good at a great many things.” The grin was in his voice. I didn’t need to see his face to know it.

“You’re ridiculous.” I sighed as I sat back, trying to hide my smile.

“Only on my best days.” Talon smirked and kissed me again.

I slid my fingers over his forearms and then biceps, “I’ve been trying to add to my knowledge around my power. With the book that we used to heal you.”

“Oh? That’s big Magik love. It’s also a bitch to read. I tried once. It gave me a headache.” Talon rubbed my thighs and I felt an emotion skitter across the tether. Apprehension. I didn’t blame him. He was right. Not that I would say that aloud if I didn’t have to. If the book was able to reverse dark Magik and purge it from a long-suffering victim, it was strong.

“I know, but I think I found something.” I lifted my hand and Talon wisely took a few steps back. My fingers lit first and then the light spread down my wrist then farther until it reached my elbow. I hissed softly and let it continue up to my shoulder and then across to the other to slip down to my opposite hand.

“Okay. Pretty. The fuck is it?” Talon raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms.

“I think, if I’ve translated correctly, that I can burn the poison out of my body. The only requirement was a healing ability.” I let it go and gasped as I tried to remain on the counter. I kept using up my reserves. At this rate, I’d never be at full power again.

Talon’s head tilted. His eyes lingered on my fingers before following the route my Magik had taken over my body, “Does it hurt, or is it because your strength is depleted?”

I frowned, holding my head as it started to hurt, “Well…I’ve only tried while not at my best.”

“Yeah. That’s what I thought. You’re going to sleep. If you don’t do it by choice, I will put you to sleep.” Talon said as he swept me off the counter and threw me over his shoulder. I struggled a little but it was useless. Talon had his mind up. There was no swaying the man. I went limp and his free hand smacked my backside. I yelped and he quickly shushed me.

“Kalian. There are people sleeping. Don’t be rude.”

I rolled my eyes and let my hands hang as we left the alchemy room and Talon carried me through the house. I sighed softly after he dropped me on the bed, none too gently. I even bounced a bit. I sent a glare his way, but he was already crawling in on the other side and trapping me in his arms. He covered us with a blanket and I tried to relax. Eon had mentioned a meeting with the Council. I was sure it would go about as well as the last few had and I was not looking forward to it.

Hopefully, we made some decisions and our grief didn’t influence too much of our behavior. It was a fool’s hope, but I could never deny myself any light I found in the darkest situations.