Black Sheep Part 1 - 15. Chapter 15

Oh, shit! I see Jack flee to the living room, hearing him curse out loud. Tom looks at me, then at the door and back. A couple of minutes later the cursing hasn't stopped and my anger rises.

Tom stands up and offers me an apologetic look. “I'll get him to quiet down. You take care of Vic.”

I breathe deeply and say through gritted teeth, “You should, or I'm gonna make him shut up. And right now I don't know how that would turn out.”

Tom softly squeezes my shoulder. “You take care of Vic. That is the most important thing right now.” He leaves the bedroom and quietly closes the door behind him, shutting out most of the noise from Jack's cursing.

Vic calms down and falls asleep in my arms but the cursing and accusing haven't stopped yet.

I'm still full of anger and desperate to take it out on something... anything, or anyone. I gently put Vic down and cover him with a blanket, realizing that he's still fully dressed. I leave him like that for now, there are more important things to attend to.

I softly close the doors of the bedroom and the living room behind me as I fully face Jack, who is pacing up and down the living room. I try to keep myself together but as soon as he sees me he explodes again.

“Don't worry? You call THAT nothing to worry about? This is crazy! You're all crazy!”

Even though I feel like exploding too, my anger is more quiet.

“Don't. You. Dare.” I walk up close to him, hands clenched into fists, my jaw locked and I spit through gritted teeth. “Don't you dare judge him!”

“Judge? Judge? I'm just calling things as I see them!” He tries to use his height to intimidate me but it only triggers the explosion I had been holding at bay.

I smack him in the face and fume. “How dare you! I thought you deserved him but apparently you don't!”

“Maybe I don't deserve him, but at least I'd have a normal life. This is wrong!”

A loud bang startles us and we all turn towards the front door. The thud of army boots running down the stairs make us realize that Vic heard everything and is now gone.

My anger immediately leaves me and I slump down on a chair quietly cursing my own stupidity, this is going to be a long day.

After a while I look up. Jack is standing still as a statue, eyes like a deer caught in the headlights of a car, breathing in shallow gasps. All the anger and energy in the room is gone and leaves us both drained.

“So, can you finally act normally again?” Tom startles us as he walks in with two cups of tea. “Now, you guys sit down and have a normal conversation before I kick you both out.” He puts the cups on the table and gets a cup for himself from the kitchen.

“I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking straight. Those scars freaked me out. I'm sorry.” Jack sits next to me, resting his head on his arms on the table.

I put my hand on his head. “It's okay. I get it. It is scary when you see them for the first time.”

“Will he be back?” Jack's voice wavers with insecurity.

“Of course he will. He just needs to cool down for a bit and he'll call when he's ready.” I put my hands around my cup and sip at the hot liquid.

We sit in silence for a while before Jack sighs deeply.

“Why?” his voice is calm but it has an edge to it.

“Why what?” I look up at him.

“Why did my finding out about the scars freak him out so much?”

“Haven't you just answered your own question? Or do we have to repeat that fight?” I try to make it sound like I'm joking but it comes out almost angry.

“Guys, easy. I will throw you out if you start that again.” Tom warns as he watches us from the other side of the table.

“Sorry, but maybe it would have been better if he'd told me before. Or warned me or something,” Jack sighs. “Or, I don't know, anything?”

“And then? You'd dump him before you really got to know him? Or would you have freaked out and hurt him, instead of taking it out on me?” My voice is dangerously low, this conversation is going in a direction I don't want it to go in. I abruptly stand up and walk to the window while quietly muttering. “Like Dave did. Asshole.” I sit on the windowsill putting my head against the cold glass, looking out onto the street below.

“Who hurt him?” I hear Jack ask from the table. I shake my head, signalling Tom he isn't supposed to tell.

“Vic's ex freaked out when he found out about the scars.” Tom says turning to me. “I see no use in hiding this. I know Vic doesn't want us to tell, but this is the least we can do for them.”

“Yeah, I guess.” I rest my head against the window again as a hand cautiously rests on my back.

“I'm sorry I freaked out.” Jack whispers.

“You should tell that to Vic, not me.” I say roughly.

“No, you too. I did the exact same thing as his ex did and you were right, I have no right to judge either of you.” He holds me in a loose hug and sighs. “I hope he'll forgive me.”

“He will. You're a good kid.” I close my eyes, praying I'm right.

“I'm sorry, I shouldn't have run away but I couldn't handle you guys fighting. Especially not about me. Especially not about that.” Vic is standing in the doorway looking like a lost kitten.

“I'm sorry. I love you.” Jack is hiding behind me, scared that Vic is going to rip him apart for the fight, but Vic smiles and pulls us both in a big hug, crushing me between them.

“I love both of you, but please stop fighting.” Vic moves us towards the living room “Lets go watch a comedy or something, I could use a laugh.”

“Are you really okay? I don't think I can do it like this.” I quietly say to Vic as we sit down on the couch.

“Nah, I'm okay now, I just needed it out of my system. We can talk about this later.” Vic smiles and ruffles my hair, but I see the pain in his eyes as he sneaks a peek at Jack.

“You guys should talk about this now, not later.” I look Vic in the eye but he avoids me.

“We really don't, there's been enough anger here for one day.” Vic sighs.

“So you really are mad at me?” Jacks voice is unsure. “I am sorry for the fight. Please forgive me.”

“I'm not mad at you.” Vics voice wavers as he whispers. “I'm mad at me. Just, me.” He hangs his head and Jack cautiously puts a hand on his hands.

“Don't be mad at yourself, there is no reason to get mad at yourself.” Jack softly whispers.

“You're hurting because of me. I don't want to hurt you, I promised myself not to hurt you. Never to hurt you. But I did, I don't deserve you. I'm sorry.” Vic slides off the couch and rolls into a ball on the floor while repeating the last sentences as a mantra. “I don't deserve you, I'm sorry.” I want to hug Vic and make him feel safe but Jack is faster.

Jack covers Vic with his body and whispers “It's okay. I'm okay. I love you. It's okay, I love you.” I smile to myself as I see Vic relax in Jacks arms. Maybe they were getting somewhere...