Now back to reality and normalcy, I might be a trekkie, but I am a realist stuck in a world that needs answers.
My last day is this Wednesday at my current firm. The staff are throwing me a farewell potluck on Tuesday. It feels strange that I will be saying goodbye to them all after so many years, but that's life isn't it.
As my prior status indicated my new job has already booked me on a flight to Palm Beach Florida from 12/3 to 7. I know what this means for my future traveling plans, but I do love the idea of travel and going around the country to do numbers. I mean it's what everyone does at one point or another.
Part of me though feels sad and even lonely. I know boo-whoo, you have a job that is paying for you to travel to a tropical climate, while everyone else is freezing their ass off or some other guys are still without power from Sandy or are on the unemployment rolls. I know my issue is small in comparison to the problems of the world and I don't kid myself or anyone about where I stand. However, part of me feels scared that I will no longer have an anchor to anything or anyone. I am afraid that on my long journeys, I may never find that special guy of my dreams that I have always wanted.
Is that a real fear of being better off in your career that you can't find anyone?
To be honest, if I could trade all the money in the world for a desk job with moderate income and a guy at my side, making my lonely existence matter just a little bit, I would do it in a heart beat.
It's not to say I don't like this job, nor what the opportunities are out there. Hell, I think this will be great for my future. I just wish I had a reason.