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This is why I don't do this.

GREEN

Entry posted by GREEN

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Today I ran into my highschool crush who so happens to be a good guy. First thing he asks me about Chaz. My face was so red that you put a heinz ketchup bottle next to it and not know the difference. He starts telling my how much he digs Chaz and how he would like to see him again. Meanwhile I feel like a deer caught in the headlights because of what happened last night.

 

"He's such a great guy I hope he gives me answer soon," he says as I slowly die before him. "Hey maybe you and your boyfriend could go on a double date with us." I feel so guilty at this point and I just want to crawl under a rock and die. So much for having Chaz as a boyfriend.

 

This is all that comes out of my mouth. "Chaz kissed me last night. I didn't cheat Julio dumped me."

 

"God I knew it," he says shaking his head. "I knew it the other night at that bar. He kept looking at you," he says. I'm like why was this so ovbious to every one but me? He asks me what happened with Julio and I explain every thing. I'm still waiting for him to hit me because I took his gorgeous man when he looks at me with a weird smile.

 

"Maybe you could hook me up with his brother," he asks me and I'm like damn boy slow down. I kindly explain to him my policy against hooking up friends. Not that I would want him to date him anyways.

 

My second encounter of the day would Be Chaz's brother himself. Not five minutes after I said goodbye to my high school crush I run into Chaz's brother who is looking very agitated. I walk over to him and I ask him what's up? (In retrsopect I don't know why I did this). He then gives me this whole drowned out story about his whole meager existence that I really could care less about. As you know Chaz's brother and I arent exactly best friends but I am civil towards him because let's face it's Chaz's brother.

 

So I give him some advice that seems to calm him down. Then he starts asking me about my ex. I'm like OH NO I don't play cupid. So I give him the same rundown on my rules that I gave my highschool Crush. he seems to understand and I go about my way.

 

Class was good and fast today so I didn't need to do much before I headed back home. When I got home I found Julio sitting on the front steps. "Hi," he says. I notice his bags and he just smiles. My whole world just stopped. I was angry and hurt and I wanted to kill and hug him at the same time. I can't deny what I still feel for him but I wasn't having this. NO he can't just decide to leave me then show up a week later. Hell no!

 

"Leave," I told him and he looked at me.

 

"Green look I know I messed up but I thought." Slam the door went and I locked it right away. He still outside waiting for me to let him in as I write this. I know'll I'll eventually let him in and then a huge fight will ensue. I am just preparing myself and my fists.

 

GREEN slamming the door in Julio's face.

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NaperVic

NaperVic 161

Posted

He still outside waiting for me to let him in as I write this. I know'll I'll eventually let him in and then a huge fight will ensue. I am just preparing myself and my fists.

 

OMG!!!! I know this is your life Green and I'm not making light of it, but it's still a cliffhanger!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

libbonobo

libbonobo 1

Posted

Don't you yell at him. Rather, listen and try to understand. He didn't leave for no reason. Part of what I was trying to convey in my previous posts is that it is completely possible that he has felt taken for granted & treated like a second class citizen. Had I been Julio and reading your blog, I would definitely have felt that way.

Rocketcnj

Rocketcnj 2

Posted

Green,

 

Good Luck and Lots of Hugs....and well, you know I am biased...I am hoping you and Chaz end up together (and um, not that my vote counts..trust me it doesn't..only yours does)

 

Any how.....Hugs and Good Karma sent your way..and I hope that fists are avoided and conversation is in depth and closure achieved, if that is what you want. (fingers crossed it is the start of real healing for you:)

 

Michael

NickolasJames8

NickolasJames8 807

Posted

:hug: No matter what happens, good luck. :hug:
reapersharvest

reapersharvest 3

Posted

I swear, Green, you could sell tickets to this drama. I rank your blog up there with Days of our Lives.

Bardeara

Bardeara 132

Posted

So I know you are going to let him in because that is just the kind of guy that you are. If you don't want him back that is fine, if you do that is fine too. Either way you need to talk to him to find peace within yourself in order to properly move forward from this roller coster that you are clearly on.

 

Good Luck Green I know your in need of it.

 

PS. anymore news on that wacked out kid next door?

JamesSavik

JamesSavik 24,779

Posted

Angry Flashback

_________________________________________-

When Lee left me, I was crushed. I didn't take it so well. I felt like he was my last chance at being with someone.

 

I begged him to talk to me but it didn't work. He hooked up with a chick that was a real piece of work. She knew that Lee's family was loaded so she latched on to him for the ride.

 

It took a little while for me to figure something out: if he did come back, how could I ever trust him again?

 

After all, the night before we had wild hot outrageous sex and the next day when I got home after work, he was gone. No note, no explanation, nothing. Just gone.

 

It took a while to get over the hurt but I learned a hard lesson. I didn't want his cowardly @ss back. He was afraid of who he was and he was hiding behind a golddigger so he could get back on the family gravy train.

 

Well, that was 10 years ago. He's divorced, bald and fat now and as far as I'm concerned, he can f* himself. I wouldn't take that cowardly piece of dung back if he shat gold bars and pissed champaign.

 

He didn't talk to me because he was ashamed of what he did. He knew that it was weak and cowardly to cave in to his redneck parents for money. He didn't have the guts to face me.

 

As much as it hurt, I don't need that. I'm glad that he's gone and that he didn't stick around to betray me when something came up that really mattered.

 

Yeah. I'm mad. I've been out since I was 13 and taken the heat for it. Full grown men that are cowardly little bitches just piss me off.

 

:pissed:

 

 

****Sorry. This triggered an issue that I've still got issues with. I'm not mad at Green, Chaz, Julio or anybody here. Once I got rolling, it kinda just came out. Guess I needed to talk about it. Sorry for being an angry jerk in your blog Green. I hope it works out for you man.

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