He still outside waiting for me to let him in as I write this. I know'll I'll eventually let him in and then a huge fight will ensue. I am just preparing myself and my fists.

OMG!!!! I know this is your life Green and I'm not making light of it, but it's still a cliffhanger!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Don't you yell at him. Rather, listen and try to understand. He didn't leave for no reason. Part of what I was trying to convey in my previous posts is that it is completely possible that he has felt taken for granted & treated like a second class citizen. Had I been Julio and reading your blog, I would definitely have felt that way.

Green,

Good Luck and Lots of Hugs....and well, you know I am biased...I am hoping you and Chaz end up together (and um, not that my vote counts..trust me it doesn't..only yours does)

Any how.....Hugs and Good Karma sent your way..and I hope that fists are avoided and conversation is in depth and closure achieved, if that is what you want. (fingers crossed it is the start of real healing for you:)

Michael

I swear, Green, you could sell tickets to this drama. I rank your blog up there with Days of our Lives.

So I know you are going to let him in because that is just the kind of guy that you are. If you don't want him back that is fine, if you do that is fine too. Either way you need to talk to him to find peace within yourself in order to properly move forward from this roller coster that you are clearly on.

Good Luck Green I know your in need of it.

PS. anymore news on that wacked out kid next door?

Angry Flashback

_________________________________________-

When Lee left me, I was crushed. I didn't take it so well. I felt like he was my last chance at being with someone.

I begged him to talk to me but it didn't work. He hooked up with a chick that was a real piece of work. She knew that Lee's family was loaded so she latched on to him for the ride.

It took a little while for me to figure something out: if he did come back, how could I ever trust him again?

After all, the night before we had wild hot outrageous sex and the next day when I got home after work, he was gone. No note, no explanation, nothing. Just gone.

It took a while to get over the hurt but I learned a hard lesson. I didn't want his cowardly @ss back. He was afraid of who he was and he was hiding behind a golddigger so he could get back on the family gravy train.

Well, that was 10 years ago. He's divorced, bald and fat now and as far as I'm concerned, he can f* himself. I wouldn't take that cowardly piece of dung back if he shat gold bars and pissed champaign.

He didn't talk to me because he was ashamed of what he did. He knew that it was weak and cowardly to cave in to his redneck parents for money. He didn't have the guts to face me.

As much as it hurt, I don't need that. I'm glad that he's gone and that he didn't stick around to betray me when something came up that really mattered.

Yeah. I'm mad. I've been out since I was 13 and taken the heat for it. Full grown men that are cowardly little bitches just piss me off.

****Sorry. This triggered an issue that I've still got issues with. I'm not mad at Green, Chaz, Julio or anybody here. Once I got rolling, it kinda just came out. Guess I needed to talk about it. Sorry for being an angry jerk in your blog Green. I hope it works out for you man.