An interesting question with thought provoking answers.
You were probably feeling down when you wrote it but there was nothing suicidal or depressive in it.
Choices are not as real as we want to imagine, there's lots of probabilities involved and there are many things we can't choose, let's face it we're given a character to play with. We can't change it. Our sources are limited and our friends too. We can change a few things if we get lucky .
As for the legacy, i don't see children as our legacy, if I am here it was a combination of luck and my own attempts, if im successful, it's my own work. If I'm a fucked up faggot, same difference.
So that's why I'm working on my phD, maybe I win some prize one day😅😂