AFriendlyFace

No, but now I want to! Thanks for the idea

Crud, I might as well go back to being blonde......uh what website are we talking about here? Do you mean like the Dom Luka/Domaholic section of Gayauthors? Or is there some page you guys have been sneaking off to without telling me? ***leaves mud all around the door for tracking purposes*** Anyway if you mean this page: http://domluka.gayauthors.org/ I pretty much like it like it is, but wouldn't mind too much seeing some change. I would kinda like to keep the stories themselves on the color scheme they have. With TLW on a pale blue, TOU with the pale green, and DD with the yellow. I know I'm silly but I've grown to like it. Any other enhancement would be welcome though, and I'll probably get over it if you change the other stuff too. As far as suggestions go. BLUE, lots and lots of BLUE. Royal blue or a deep, fairly dark blue ideally. That said I'm not picky, and I'm sure you'll do a great job Nate! Thanks for undertaking this for us, I think it's awesome (assuming I've got it straight in my head which site we're actually talking about). Take care, Kevin

I was trembling. I'd carefully avoided it all day, but now the withdrawal was getting stronger. My nerves were shot. I couldn't stop pacing. Thinking back I realized that I couldn't pinpoint the exact time the addiction started. At first it was something I only did occasionally. Maybe as a way to celebrate, or after a stressful day. Then I gradually began to need a fix everyday. I'd promised myself those days were behind me now. I'd even told everyone that, that part my history was just that, history. Yet at this moment, I knew it was hopeless to even contemplate continuing my night unless I had just one more hit......one more and then I could be free. It was late, and cold. Only a junkie would be going out on a night like this. I shrugged and tried to dismiss the thought as I hurriedly left my apartment and began my lonely walk. Oh I knew all the places to go for it. I eventually settled on a location not too far from home. Sure it was risky. There was a greater chance of someone I knew seeing me, but I didn't think I'd make it if I had to go further......they all thought I was clean now, and that was fine with me.....besides it was no one's business but mine. I'd walked fast; I was there before I knew it. I had second thoughts. Perhaps I can fight this. Maybe if I go home and can just get through this night, the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel will be in sight........no, no I couldn't resist, not this time. And anyway I was already here. He knew what I wanted as soon as he saw me. "Back again I see" He stated with a smug, self-satisfied smile. "yes, yes" I replied, fervently anticipating my next fix. I bought more than I needed. This much would probably last a typical person a week and a half at least......I'd be lucky to get three days out of it. I quickly paid and left. Eager to make my way home and get the relief I so craved. The walk home was a blur. I remember wrestling with myself, forcing back the urge to just stop right there and get reacquainted with the bliss I so desperately longed for. I wanted it....No I NEEDED it......not here though; no not here.....too many prying eyes. Eventually I made it home. After fumbling with the lock I finally slammed the door behind me and breathed a sigh of relief. My deliverance was at hand now. I took out double the standard amount......I was no greenhorn by any stretch of the imagination. And then! OHHHH what ecstasy! What a sublime ride I was now on! The next few minutes are hazy. It was all gone almost before it started. The only thing I can say for sure is...... God I love chocolate!

Bev's Right, Nick. Writing/talking/thinking about your dreams (and feelings) is a great way to make peace with them and ultimately feel better. Lately it seems I can't remember my dreams at all. Yesterday I was on campus and got so sleepy I took a nap in my truck, lol. And I know I was having a pleasent dream that I wanted to remember, but darnit if AS SOON as I woke up I'd forgotten the whole thing. Anyway I hope you feel better, and let us know if you want to talk about it. Take care Kevin

Thanks guys! Glad you liked them

Great story, Green. I'm eagerly looking forward to the next installment

I'm not speaking to myself right now. I had this horrible argument with me earlier, and after some of the things I said, I've decided that I'm just an unreasonable jerk. Still I can never stay mad at me too long, before I know it I'm sure I'll be joking and laughing with myself just like old times.

I have two if you want to borrow one, RK?

Awww! What an adorable and fun conversation! I want one! (cute, sexy guy to have similar conversations with that is.......though without the panties.....boxers work don't they? ) Anyway I hope your lunch (and desert ) were awesome! Take care and have a great day! Kevin P.S. now we'll know the reason why if Stephan develops an underwear fetish in your story

I just listend to the song. I really like it, I love the melody and the singing is definitely highly euphonic. I just wish I could understand what they were saying. Do you know of any sites that would have a translation? But really though that doesn't even take away too much from my enjoyment. And also you've got a point about wanting to hug happy people, I often get that urge myself.....though I often want to hug sad people too, and of course pretty people Anyway thanks for suggesting them, take care, and have a great day. Kevin

...Actually my final semester started Tuesday. At least I'm almost finished though. Anyway I had an awesome break! And I'm actually kinda looking forward to this final semester. How's everything with you, Tony? Hope you're having a great time! Congrats again on everything going so well with you mom, and good luck with your dad. And it really sounds like you're handling it all SO well, I'm really impressed, way to go! Anyway take care and have an awesome day. Kevin

Well Done! Now you have me tempted to join too lol. Awesome job!

wow Nicole! I'm impressed with the skillful and mature way you've been handling this, way to go! As to your mother's reaction denial is a normal phase for parents to go through, and I'm assuming that once everything else is out in the open, and you're explicitly talking about your girlfriend, and spending time with her, and the "phase" doesn't go away, well she'll more than likely eventually come to terms with the fact that you ARE bisexual (and hopefully also be OK with it). As for your dad's reaction, well perhaps I'm being overly optimistic, but I didn't see that as such a bad start. I mean of course it would have been better if he'd been like "oh he's gay! Great! I've known so many teriffic gay people." But just the fact that he's OK with having Edwin in the house, willing to meet him, and "doesn't have a problem with gay people" puts him WAY ahead of MANY people. I'm inclined to re-ask the question Howie posed: "was he specific about anything or just vague like that?" If he didn't say anything in particular it's possible that that's just his loosely held opinion, and it's very open to change.....This is a rediculous analogy and please forgive me for using something so trivial at a time like this. But I clearly remember saying to many of my friends just a few years ago "I don't like mustard, I don't mind that other people like it, and I'll even keep it in my fridge incase someone wants some, but I don't like it myself."......well now a few years later I've gradually been exposed to mustard, found out it's good for me and not at all untastey, and welll I LIKE mustard now...........what I'm saying is, once he actually finds out he has a bisexual daughter, and is more exposed to that sort of thing, there's a good chance he naturally come around, especially if his beliefs aren't too strong or closed-minded. And assuming that Edwin is a good person, and a credit to gay peopole everywhere, having them get to know each other might also help. This is an EXCELLENT point. It doesn't sound like your situation is too bad, but if there is any chance of such serious repercussions you might want to wait until you're "on your own" so to speak. Speaking for myself, I was never really THAT worried about how my mom would take the news. I mean she always made it apparent that she'd love and support me no matter what, so I figured even if she didn't like it she'd come around, BUT I have to admit that one of the most comforting and confidence inspiring thoughts was the fact that worst case scenario I was on my own, supporting myself and there was really nothing she could do about it. In fact a few months earlier I'd lent her a bit of money (at my insistance), and when I told her she was visiting me for the Thanksgiving holidays, so again worst case-scenario at least I was "on my own turf". But of course if these aren't concerns for you then I wouldn't worry about it, also you probably would have resources to fall back on with the gay cousins etc. And, just my opinion, but it really doesn't sound like your parents are that type to me. I suspect they'll be fine with it sooner or later. WOW Tony! I'm seriously impressed, way to go dude! You handled that like a professional! I'm so glad for you, and hope everything goes as well with your father! Anyway I wish you all the best Nicole (and Tony with his dad) and let us know how it goes. Take care Kevin

That's a very good point. I definitely did think it was a very good movie, I just like to like the characters. I also wondered if Jack died the way Ennis imagined, or if that was just a mental image he'd gotten (I'm guessing the former, but it seems pretty open to interpretation). Also my opinion is that, that wouldn't have happened if he and Ennis had gotten a ranch or something together. Oh sure something similar might have happened, but that wouldn't have since Jack wouldn't have even been in Texas. Anyway glad to get your opinions, Ben. Have an awesome day everyone and take care. Kevin

That was such a great chapter! I loved it, I know I've said this about a few of the other chapters in the past, but I really think this one was the BEST! I cried for practically the entire chapter, and now it's raining so I think I'm going to have a nice melancholy walk in the rain. that was a really sad part in the movie, I remember crying too. aww ya shoulda just gone with it Shadows I cried WAY more with this chapter than with brokeback, but that could have been largely because I was in the privacy of my room as opposed to a moive theater. But also I think because it's easier for me to Identify with Rory. That was a really awesome and touching quote, and I read it several times too, but my favorite was:

I just saw it Thursday night. I'm definitely glad I saw it. I thought it was very realistic and the acting was great. I also appreciated the ending, and found it moving. However, I'm not sure if I can say I really liked the movie. I wanted to see it and I'm glad I did, and who knows I may watch it again, but liking it is something else entirely. **warning some spoilers ahead** I think the major problem I had was that I didn't really like any of the characters. I mean I started off giving them all the benefit of the doubt, but most of the main characters ticked me off. For one thing I find it difficult to like any character that's having an affair, which was a strike against both the main characters to start out with (and what I anticipated having the most trouble with). I tried to validate it by saying something to the effect of "well they're really in love with each other, but it's impossible for them to be together",,,,,but even with that said I still think it's pretty cruddy that they're messing around on their wives. If that had been the only thing I think I could have just ignored it and tried to excuse it in this complicated context But: Ennis I had a great deal of trouble "liking" as a character. I mean I felt REALLY sorry for him, and I didn't dislike him, and I even understood why he was the way he was. But I still hated the way he treated his wife and kids, and that waitress. Then when he scoffed at Jack's idea about running off together and living on some ranch....well that was the straw that broke the camel's back so to speak. I mean basically they DID have a chance at living happily ever after or whatever, and he not only threw it away but was insulting to top it off. Jack I liked for most of the movie. In fact I really liked him right up until the time he went to see Ennis and Ennis said that since he was going to be spending the weekend with his daughters, Jack would have to leave. Of course I felt really sorry for him, and briefly liked him even more......Then he hooked up with that prostitute in Mexico on the way home, and well that was it. I mean I'd more or less come to terms with the fact that he was messing around on his wife with Ennis, and that it was "true love" or whatever. But with anyone else, it's just a cheap, dirty affair. Also he was cheating on Ennis. I found it a huge perversion of their love. There just no excusable reason (in my mind) for him to cheat on Ennis and his wife. All that can be said was that it was an "anger F***" but understanding it doesn't make it right. I did of course have some trouble with the way they treated each other at times anyway, but I was willing to mostly ignore that because of the time, and context etc. Alma I liked for the most part. I just felt really sorry for her. I think what bothered me most about her is that it took her so long to confront Ennis, but I guess I can't really criticize her much. Jack's wife, Anne, I loved at first. Then she just grew progressively colder and more distant and I gradually lost most of my initial fondness for her. I'm thinking I liked the waitress and Ennis's daughter, Alma, the best. I have no real complaints about either of them, and seeing the way Ennis treated them probably did the most to make me less favourably disposed to him. Anyway it was definetely a great movie and I'm glad I saw it. I just wish I'd liked Jack and Ennis more, but I guess that's mostly irrelevant. Anyway I would recommend everyone see it! Have an awesome day and take care everyone! Kevin

So I was just in one of those reminiscent moods this evening and I got to thinking of all the funny little moments in my life over the last year or so. SO for your reading pleasure, and in the spirit of my reminiscing, I'll recount a few. ************************************************** Setting and background: Me, Kim and a couple of other co-workers were all at work and somehow the conversation turned to underwear. Kim: "My pants are so lose, I wish I'd worn some cuter underwear today, just in case . I bought several really cute ones pairs the other day. One had "thrill me" written across the back. Another "love me" and the third pair had "tease me" on them" Me: "Don't worry Kim, I'm sure if your pants fall off people will tease you anyway." *************************************************** Setting and background: Again we're at work, this time it's me, Amber, and Scott. Amber: "Did you guys see that girl? She had the exact haircut I want to get." Me: "Which girl?" Amber: "The one that was just in here, Scott was flirting with her." Me: " *laughs* like that narrows it down." *************************************************** Setting and background: I'm hanging out with a friend of mine at her apartment. She's just taken a temporary job for the holidays working in a department store, and she's showing me photos she took with her phone. Amanda: "So that's what the place looks like, oh and this is one of my co-workers, she's a wrapper" Me: **very confused ** "That preppy looking white girl is a rapper?!?" ************************************************** Setting and background: I'm at work and handling hot pans when I accidently touch one against my stomach. Amber: "Oh no are you ok?" Me: "huh?" **Noticing** "Oh yeah, wow, didn't even notice, it didn't hurt at all." Amber: "whew, must have been all that padding (I'm wearing 2 shirts and an apron)" Me: " I really wish you'd rephrase that" ************************************************** Setting and background: Again I'm at work (can you tell I work too much?), and we're trying to remove an ugly, sticky stain from something. We had another co-worker who was REALLY obsessed with chemistry. You could be talking about anything and he'd tie it into chemistry somehow. Lauren: **sigh** "If only Ruston were here he could whip us up a solvent that would take that right out" ************************************************** Setting and background: I'm with my mom and she's telling someone about the new car she just bought, a Ford Focus. Friend: "what kind of car is it?" Mom: "it's a..uhh, oh shoot I can't remember the name now" Me: "Focus" Mom: "I'm trying" ************************************************* Setting and background: This actually took place about 2 years ago. My cousin had just finished telling us all a very sad story about a friend she had, who'd fallen into the tragic pattern of "cutting" or self-mutilation, and had to be hospitalized as a result. Grandmother: "Hmm, I just can't understand it. I'm one of the last people I'd want to mutilate." Everyone else: ************************************************* Setting and background: I was sitting in my Latin class last summer, and our professor was going over last night's assignment. Suddenly he became distracted. Professor: **Squinting and trying to read one of the girl's shirts** "what's your shirt say, and what's the arrow for?" Girl: **very embarrassed and laughing** "It says "I'm up here pervert" " ************************************************** Setting and background: This final one actually took place about 5 years ago, but it's definitely one of the worst incidences of bad timing I've ever experienced. I was in my high school speech class, and we'd just drawn our topics for the final speeches we had to give. Speech Teacher: "now remember everyone, I don't care if you guys swap topics, as long as SOMEONE does a speech on each of the topics." Me: "what did you get Philip?" Philip: "I have to give a speech about drug use among teenagers" Lacy: "I'm giving mine on premarital sex." Me: "eughh, I hate mine. It's about politics, I can't stand talking about politics." ***At this moment our Religion teacher walks in. I think I was one of her favorite students, and as well as telling the speech teacher something, she was there to let me know that I'd made an A on her final** Me: **turning to Lacy, without noticing the religion teacher walk in** "Hey Lacy, can I have your premarital sex?" R. Techer: "Kevin!!" Me: "No wait you don't understand!" R. Teacher: **walking out** "I don't want to hear it." I guess it coulda been worse, Philip could have been the one with the premarital sex ....I was so hot for him that year anyway!

I clearly remember this one incident when I was a kid. My mom and I were on our way home, and someone cut my mom off in traffic. And the "F. Word" slipped out of her mouth. Well a couple of hours later, I go to the fridge for ice, and the ice maker is blocked up. So I pop downstaires to tell my mom and grandma. So in I walk and promptly exclaim: "The Ice maker's F-d up"

So I was just preparing my dinner and I thought up this little joke. I hope you guys like it. Take care and have an awesome day everyone! Kevin "Let goooo!" whined Billy as his neighbor, Mr. Louis, held onto his ear with one hand and pounded on Billy's front door with the other. As soon as Billy's mother answered the door she took in the sight with a gasp. "what's going on? What did you do this time Billy?" Billy opened his mouth to answer but Mr. Louis cut him off. "I'll tell you what he did! I caught him in my garden taking a leek!

Shirley that wouldn't bother anyone

***so this probably won't really be very interesting to anyone, but I still wanted to post it just in the general "journal" sorta way people do, ignore it unless you've got extra time on your hands or think I'm a much better storyteller than I'm guessing I am.*** So last night I was just getting into the shower. I'd adjusted the water temp. and I pulled the stopper up on the faucet to turn on the shower stream and......the little plastic washer thing that blocks up the water and makes it go up into the showerhead fell out. It seems it's worn out and nearly torn in half. So I turned off the water, laid down on my back and got my head under there to have a look. I think I can fix it if I have a new washer thing, it's just a matter of finding the right one, getting some needle-nose pliers, streatching the washer wide enough with the pliers to get it over the big plastic thing and all the other junk that's on the inside of the faucet, and then scrapping it off with some sort of hook or something, and into place around the bottom of the stopper. Sure I could just call the maintenance man, but that would be like admitting I couldn't do it on my own. Plus no telling when he'd show up, probably when I'm not home. I'd be worried about the cats getting out if he left the door open, and I know they'd get into the bathroom and mess stuff up after he left. Plus in general I think it'll be fun, and it's something I should be able to do. I replaced my sink fixture a year or so ago, and I've fixed countless toilets over the years, so a little plumbing isn't beyond me. Now I just need to run over to the local hardware store and see if I can buy a replacement washer. So classes are going okay I suppose. I had a completely dreadful night class on Thursdays "Industrial Psychology", I had to take it because we have to have a certain number of hours from each of the several sections, and it was either this or some horrible reseach methods class or something, and anyway I like night classes in general. This guy went on for two hours about the history of industrial psy., which probably isn't that riveting to begin with, but in his emotionless monotone it was even worse, anyway at the end of two hours he says "I know I gave you guys a quick history but...." and I'm thinking "NO you really didn't!". Anyway my other night class on Wednesday night, advanced child psyc, is with a much more interesting prof. It's funny I also took regular child psyc. and adolescent, those two with a different prof, and I only took them because she was really cool and fun, and now I'm only taking this because this prof. is really cool and fun (I had him for abnormal,,,actually adv. child psyc. is another class I pretty much had to take, or take something awful, but this one I kinda wanted to take and think I'll enjoy). By and large I'd have to say that psychology and sociology professors are usually pretty cool people, but occasionally you get a dull "normal" one, and it just sucks the fun right out. Anyway I also have a sociology class, I think it's an advanced study of society or something, it seems pretty good. The prof. sounds like the classic old Southern gentleman, but I think he's also got a pretty good sense of humour, so it probably won't be too bad. I'm also taking an introductory level English class, because I took like 12 hours of these Honours lecture/seminar things while I was in the honours college, which I thought I was going to use to exempt me from my remaining english requirements (I tested out of 9 hours). But apparently they're going to fullfill my history requirement, and some other requirement. Anyway I'm actually kinda glad, I like English and it'll be a chance to brush up on Bristish Lit. (which is the subject I selected). Besides it seems like it'll be pretty easy. This prof. is really neat, he seems EXACTLY like a prof. out of Harry Potter, and speaks with an exaggerated, diction and carries himself with an over-done pompous deportment. I'm pretty sure it's all for theatrical effect, and even if it isn't it's quite fun and fascinating anyway. I'm also taking an Anthropology class. I was so excited when I found out I needed another humanity that wasn't socio or psyc. I'd been wanting to take some Anthropology classes all along but didn't think I had the room on my schedule. Anyway this is a nifty class, and my prof. is this youngish, not at all bad-looking, Indian woman. I often find Indian women attractive, there's something exotic about them, and I dig the accent. Anyway she's really fun too (I loved the way she said "derogatory" today), the really neat thing is that when you answer a question correctly she throws little snickers bars to you, and it's a big auditorium classroom, so it's fun when she's aiming at someone like way in the back. And yes I did get a snickers ...probably largely because I kinda like speaking up in large classes, whereas it seems many people are reluctant, so even though there were a couple hundred people I (and the other handfull who answered), had less competition. Anyway she was talking about how people naturally embellish stories when they tell them, so for the sake of this story I'm going to add that whenever she threw us a candy bar, she'd hop up on the desk and dance provocatively, progressively removing an article of clothing each time. My Latin class is of course what worries me the most. I'm rather lazy about stuff that demands a good bit of time, and as such I got bored and dropped the 2nd Latin 3 times before I finally finished it (I was never even doing that badly, I just got tired and apathetic about it), and I've dropped the 3rd one once before too (I WAS doing badly then). It's funny the only two classes I've ever dropped are Latin and Biology, but I dropped them each A BUNCH before finally finishing biology and getting to this (final) point in Latin. Anyway I successfully completed the 2nd Latin last summer. And in this class there was this cute guy named Nick, who I thought was possibly gay I couldn't really tell for sure, I just kinda got a vibe (then again I suck at that sorta thing so he's probably a raging "Casanova" ). Anyway he was obviously very shy and quite so I didn't notice him right away until our seats were pretty routine so I didn't get a chance to talk to him. Well anyway I'm taking the 3rd one this semester with the same prof. and who should walk in on the first day of class but Nick! So of course he goes and sits in the back, but this time I'm thinking "well next time we have class I'll try to come in a little late (or almost late), see where he's sitting and make a point to strike up a coversation with him to see if I can tell one way or the other." So today was the second day of class, but I'm disappointed to say he wasn't there. So I don't know if he dropped it, or if he was just skipping. Only time will tell I guess. Anyway I feel kinda hopeful about getting through the class this time, I did pretty well with this prof. last time and we're on pretty good terms. Anyway on a side note I got a call from an old friend/coworker who quit about 6 months ago. He wanted to see if I wanted to go have sushi with him and his girlfriend and then maybe hit the casinos.....which of course I DO want to do, so that'll be fun! I can practically taste the edemame and hear the clank of the machines already! Well I've got about two hours before we leave so I'm going to run to the hardware store and see if I can get the washer, then I'm maybe going to go for a quick run. Take care and have a great day everyone! Kevin

Aww I'm sorry Nick, that does suck! Thanks James, I definitely hope to find someone who'll be both

Oh boy, I new chapter! I'm gonna go read it now . I think it's great that you're doing the walk, I like to walk too, I wonder if they have that kinda thing in my city (I'm sure they must). LOL that is funny about your son, I hope he doesn't say it at an inappropriate time "Son, meet our new minister." :wacko: It is ashame about Eric not being around much, I hope he's doing well and comes back soon. Anyway I'm going to go read that new chapter! I'll letcha know what I think, take care and have a terrific day! Kevin

Don't worry it's probably just a headache or nerves or something. I'm sure that sort of thing has "never happened" to them before

........ ............ ......... oh and life's been unbelievably awesome as of late thank you very much !