pvtguy
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Passing out in an alley
pvtguy commented on albertnothlit's story chapter in Passing out in an alley
Very well written. Having worked with teens for many years now, you've captured the angst, mixed feelings, and the feelings that accompany dealing with a death. I await the coming chapters. -
Another great effort. Keep the gift flowing....
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I've just finished reading Second Shot and Second Shot Senior year. What a phenomenal work! I appreciated that you didn't use the trite sex scenes in Second Shot, only getting graphic when the sex was not an expression of love but of control and anger. Your talent needs to continue...I look forward to the development of this story. Thank you for sharing that talent with your readers! I, for one, am most grateful.
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Great chapter. Tony has grown but is still "young" in the relationship department. It will be great to see how they grow together. Keep it coming!
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The quality continues. I am interested to see the unveiling of Marcus...so far he has been absolutely perfect. I want to see the not-so-perfect, but all too human, side. Keep 'em coming Michael!
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Thank goodness there are people like Marcus. They really do exist. Tony is to be commended for his drive and focus. Brian, while wanting more and wanting it NOW, is doing well to keep Tony's priorities at the forefront. Good character development. Compelling story. I am looking forward to the development of this story. Good job, Michael. Keep it coming.
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Accurate description of some small towns (not all though!) and this type of "Christianity". All in all, a great story. Keep them coming!
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Forget the "ever child left behind" act...he was speaking cultural slang, not "white". Having been an educator for many years, I hear the difference daily. Anyhow, the story is great. You've created real characters and are great at showing the desires, emotions, etc. Wally's parents are stereotypical, but they are also real. I am looking forward to the development in this story.
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I love the development of the story. It is so much more real than the quick "electric" and gratuitous sex. The realization of Tony's sexuality and his coming to terms is presented well. I look forward to more chapters.
