MichaelS36

Well done, boy.

Yes it is about power. And I'm greatly relieved you find it's acceptable. I wish you well with your hunt for a switch. M

Contrary to popular belief, I smile often. However I do not suffer fools. But your post is smile worthy.

Smiling.

First, I do not abuse. No decent Dom abuses. Abuse is not love and I love my sub. I control tim by telling him what I want. It's quite simple. He obeys because it is what I want and its his nature to please. Again quite simple. I do use denial of pleasure. M

I hope you get what you desire molly. I am here to comment on your final sentence and the reason i do not use restraints with tim. I don't because it is a huge challenge and something he has to work hard for.

Again, up to you and your Dom.

You should do what is right for you. I do not require physical restraints, my sub is still wherever I put him. It maybe something you'd like to try.

Thank you Lyssa!!!

I'm sure others will appreciate your input and suggestions. However, I should have been clearer. I am not interested in bondage therefore I do not have a use for physical restraints. If I put my sub in a position, he remains there because he was told to. He is aware of the consequences should he move.

Well, it's like choosing your life partner, you don't just pick anyone do you? There has to be a connection just like any relationship. Whether you are married and in a vanilla relationship, and seek to submit outside of that relationship to a Dom or Domme, you still need a connection. That said, and going back to your previous point about vetting. While I didn't ask him how he felt about John, i could tell there was something there after we all spent time together. Had I not seen that, no matter how much I trust John, I could not ask tim to just serve the man. There has to be a connection. It has to be right.

Still LitLover, I don't believe, and you are welcome to ask him, that tim chose to be a submissive. I think it is simply his nature. And like other creatures with symbiotic (mutualism) natures there isn't a choice, it is simply what we are. Some I suppose do choose, like for sex, it's a bit of fun to be tied up and submit. But for us it is everyday, in all we do and are. M

I came back to speak to this term: their gift of submission. They are not gifting me with anything. To me and I'm not trying to offend, is very 'internet' speak or BDSM romantic novel. It brings up visions of subs in flowing, veil and other nonsense. This so-called gift is no greater than what I bring to our table. This relationship is more symbiotic. We need each other equally.

Does it surprise? Hmm. We are committed, very much so. But I would share tim with another, if it felt right. In fact I will be and have started that process. what tim wants, requires another because it is out of my range of experience. And it needs someone who knows exactly what they are doing because it could hurt him both physically and mentally. tim knows the requirements which will be submission to John the other Dom, in all ways, and myself. That said, I will always be with tim. I've known John for thirteen or so years. He knows what he's doing having been doing it for 25 years. So I trust him. I wouldn't just hand tim over to someone I don't know. But again, I will always be there. I've spoken about this in our PM group. I have not taken tim's right to make choices. tim is what he is and he has given me control, because it is right for him. It's got nothing to do with intelligence but more nature. tim is bright, intelligent, funny, and talented. he has love for live and is a great writer, and cook and partner. he needs someone to take care of the rest, of him. That's my job. I have wanted to bring in other partners, but tim resisted. Forcing him, yes i could but that would ruin our dynamic. what we are venturing into, tim asked for. he discovered something he wants to try, he understand this means submission to and serving another, so it suits us both. I get to see tim with another Dom and he gets to stretch himself and become more, which pleases me, which is really what submissives want. let me know if you have questions M

Subs, in my opinion, should be respectful to all Doms, by calling them Sir. I am aware that tim talks with @MacGreg. This doesn't bother me. If he'd kept it a secret and I'd discovered it, that would be a problem. But frankly I've never had issue with sharing or poly relationships.

I don't use physical restraints, so I really have no opinion to offer. I would say if you prefer metal, you should use it.

And that is the Dom's decision. I'm not sure what @MacGreg would say but I've never had a sub avert their eyes.

Personally don't like tim to call me Sir, I prefer my full name. Other subs that are not mine call me sir. tim is my boy, even though he is also my husband. But each relationship is different it's up to each to decide. Also I'm not part of the averting the eyes thing. Because our scenes are mainly silent, tim has to look at me for clues, so we are eyes on.

Ask if you have questions.

There's nothing I can add, I agree completely.

Beautiful Love you too. M

Not a big poetry lover as you know, but I think you change some minds. Michael

He was a piece of work, but I get it. M

Babe, I'd marry you again tomorrow. I remember you jabbing those poor green beans! I knew you were for me from the day you told me to piss off! Geez tim I never knew you could write like this. M