GanymedeRex

This youth-focused story covers a series of events in a small Wyoming community. It his quite melodramatic with numerous characters. Some of the characters are quite interesting and there are some likeable couples formed, though many of them are not explored to a satisfactory depth. There are some very unlikely scenarios and a lot of highly extreme religious zealots who appear to be attracted to this town and offended by the homosexuals attending high school there. The youths and a few adults form a Sherlock Holmes inspired group and even take out an international securities fraud conspiracy and anti-gay church league. There are a few bright moments, like a very enjoyable twin brother and a neat discussion of Richard III. As the story progresses, it devolves into blatant oppression porn that gets increasingly ridiculous. Character development falls by the wayside and it gets more bizarre and disjointed. The story would have been better if it ended about 2/3 of the way through.

As these chapters progress, this story is devolving into oppression porn and a lot of cliché. It should have ended several chapters back IMO.

The Richard III thing was really cool, as was the story bringing the boys together. I particularly liked the reciprocity discussion - I think I'll use that someday. As it happens, Richar II's body was located and examined about one year after this story was originally posted. He DID have a deformed back due to severe scoliosis. Now we know.

Toby is funny. Polio would be super unusual in the last 3-4 decades - there have been 0 cases in US since 2000. I wonder what year this is supposed to be?

Uh, I don't understand how the guy Marty violated anything. He did not divulge anything from the meetings - it was because of a personal relationship. Not that it was cool; it wasn't. Not sure high school clubs can go around banning people and ostracizing them. I think they are required to let everyone in who wants to.

This would have been a good stopping point (but there's more!) This seems to be the first Chapter with a mobile phone - it seems characters were completely dependent on house phones for all other chapters of the story....

Is there really a Billy Chase video production? I'd be all over that.

I remember being the 'Ryan' in this exact situation. There was someone infatuated with me and aggressive. I didn't see I and my 'Randy' behaved similarly. Well done.

If your profile looks anything like you and.you are nice. It won't be a problem. Go get 'em.

omg. That chapter was so damn funny. The video game descriptions were absolutely delicious! I also like the ten year old butts d sitting like puppies fighting over butter milk. This chapter was inspired!

Yes. It certainly puts a time limit in how long he can keep his secret.

I think about the insecure Christian kid that Sean seduced - I can imagine the wreckage he created in that kid's life.....

I learned something about gaydar today because of this Chapter

Wilson is so hilarious...

Wilson reminds me of myself at that age when I used to torture my older sister when she had boyfriends over. hehehe.

Wilson is a refreshing character. He's good for some comedic relief and he asks questions like a 9 year old does. He's a good one. I especially like how Randy understood he was just a kid and treated him accordingly.

Okay interesting. I don't see why press would be following these people.

I know a "IV" kid, who is called IV ("Eye Vee"). Its awful. This story is lively and interesting so far. My only advice, ditch the "rents" phrase. I work with and know a lot of kids. Nobody under 25 uses this term.

Interesting development. I am enjoying this so much. There is a richness to the storytelling - the dialogue, actions and internal monologue flow so easily and the transitions are not noticeable.

Agreed. Mike's writing craft is quite decent. I'm enjoying the slow pace.

Cultural perceptions are very different from UK-->US and US-->UK. It's interesting to see some of them play out in this chapter.

Ah nice times exploring nature. So far we've got a decent setup for an unwelcoming school environment.

What a delightful moment. I think I remember experiencing something like this as a kid, but it didn't turn out so well. Oh, at least there is a possibility for wonderful things with this boy and his Crispen.

It is very difficult to reach someone like Zach you is in a mental prison. It's hard to do. The portrayal of Brody is pretty amazing - he's like a fantasy figure of the hero savior that someone in a desperate situation wishes for but believes doesn't think is possible. Being able to reach somebody like Zach on the part of someone like Brody doesn't work most of the time, which is part of what makes this story exciting, yet it still seems realistic. I see those "I've rescued and abused child" by an adult with a RV or cool farm (or lottery winner) on storylovers, but those are mostly pedo fantasies. Abused kids aren't fetish objects just clamoring for affection; they build a fortress of fear around themselves. Comicality depicted this very well - it is amazing to watch that fortress crumble.

I wonder about Mr. Raffe. I wonder if he represents a teacher Comicality could never please in his life and that this aspect of the story is a way to relive and engage in a victory over this antagonistic teacher. On the other hand, with regards to Zack, I wonder if Mr. Raffe could have helped him become a better writer and that the impression of unrelenting criticism from the teacher is a fair and objective assessment by Zack or not. Between the option of antagonist and misinterpreted but well intended teacher, I'm provisionally going with the first impression rather than believing something more elaborate until the evidence of the story indicates otherwise.