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peter rietbergen

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  1. peter rietbergen

    Chapter 12

    I'm not normally commenting on the characters in a story - they are the author's invention, an I follow his rather than my own emotions about them. However, in this case I am struck with a more general issue, that occurs in so many gay stories. I really wonder what Dale "sees" in Cole - except for the handsome face, the winning smile, the dazzlingly white teeth. The author does let us know Dale would love C to be gay - but then what? What does D find in Cole, except the sexual attraction of male beauty (and in this case perhaps the allure of politics)? Are these enough to keep together a(n eventual) relationship?
  2. dear author, I'm not one to use this space to summarize what you've written. But a compliment on your ability to quick(-witted-)ly incorporate (sly comments on) very contemporary political issues is in order.
  3. Methinks you provide the answer: yes, we all "lie" - both to others, in our various guises and poses, and, indeed, to ourselves...
  4. Gradually, I'm reading the Parborough Chronicles as, a long time ago, I read the Chronicles of Barsetshire. Obviously, Hugill's Parborough is a thoroughly twenty-first-century place - and to chronicle it in a believable way, as Trollope did with his Barset, is an achievement. Indeed, as a nineteenth-century critic once remarked: "if the reader does not believe in Barsetshire and all who live therein […] the fault is not in Mr Trollope, but in himself". I believe - or, perhaps, should say: want to believe in Parborough.
  5. ha, that definitely has possibilities: titles with some sort of internal vocal rhyme...
  6. as to "besom": in Dutch a 'broom' is a "bezem" - and yes, it is traditionally asssociated with a witch - who, always, has a protruding nose, too.
  7. peter rietbergen

    Chapter 3

    very well done indeed.
  8. So far: love it!
  9. how about this one... A Victorian tycoon's fantasy...Though, admittedly, it is in Devon, not Essex...
  10. Interesting. From the description, I'd envisaged a house less symmetrical, Lutyenesque-Queen Annish, rather more irregular Norman Shaw Flete-ish, with turrets and a huge bay-window to accomodate the two-story hall. This one almost looks too cozy...
  11. peter rietbergen

    Chapter 7

    I'm willing to take a bet as to: Will or James...? I know ! But I'll let the author decide. I'm sure he'll take us through some complicated situations before he writes a grand finale.
  12. again: well done. This development is a clever way to avoid a long-drawn-out tale about J's trial(s) - that would have slowed down the pace of the story. The few words about Damian's tears had me tear up, too.
  13. in view of the - seemingly effortless - way you manage to infuse (especially) the dialogues in your Ludo- and Ralph-stories with life-like quality - thus making them, always, a joy to read - I can only wonder about the often clumsily-constucted texts that, alas, constitute some 75/80 % of the Gay Authors-site. Don't less-gifted authors read the work of their more experienced colleagues - and (try to) learn from it?
  14. peter rietbergen

    The Teacup

    well done indeed.
  15. I only "discoveerd" you an hour ago. But I'm already getting addicted. You're really doing a great job at writing convincing dialogue - so few here do... - and match it with convincing psychology.
  16. peter rietbergen

    3 PM

    This really is a neer-perfect story. I say: "near", because nothing ever is perfect - as you write about the Romeo-Jules relationship. But: Bravo. And, therefore: thanks !
  17. peter rietbergen

    Chapter 1

    a lovely tale indeed. Though admittedly I am not totally convinced about the acceptance of the situation by both the mother - yes, pehaps she would have, but not immediately - and the father...
  18. I'm nog going to add my dime to the above, but simply say: a Brilliant Chapter. Thanks.
  19. peter rietbergen

    Chapter 23

    Do adult, gay American men really call each other "babe"? On this side of the ocean, it isn't a term of endearment, but felt to be both sexist and belittling...Cultural differences, I suppose...
  20. There seems to be a mix-up between one Terry, and Fred....
  21. Another great chapter. And: I'm getting to appreciate Therese...I really do admire the way(s) you introduce her, and her changing attitude(s).
  22. peter rietbergen

    Chapter 22

    Will this saga leave us with an "end good, all good", i.e. "happy end" - a great couple living in an idyllic house, in an unexpectdely 'diverse'neighbourhood and with their perfect jobs, et cetera? Or will the author let us face reality - a world in which such ends rarely occur...?
  23. I'll confess that I do try to "feel" for Michael - for yes: many of us have had to go through a double live before accepting that to lead one is to betray and indeed harm other people. And yet: the ease - in words and in gestures, actions - with which M continues to betray Sarah makes it hard going.
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