centexhairysub
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Everything posted by centexhairysub
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I felt this was a very uneven chapter; it just didn't flow well to me. While the fight was not unexpected; it seemed to come out of no where; maybe there just wasn't enough of the backstory to why the fight was so bad given. This is the first disappointing chapter to me.
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Until F'rian can deal with whatever happened in the past, I am not sure that he and J'day can ever fully come together. J'day needs to tell F'rian about the move before he finds out from someone else...
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I just want to shake J'day and F'rian both, they can't seem to get their stuff together at the same time.
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I don't really understand F'rian's reluctance to take credit for anything that is his idea. Is there something else in his past that keeps him wanting to stay in the background that we haven't been given some idea of?
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They act like an old married couple instead of the tentative first stirrings of being together for the first time. I suspect that at least once, F'rian was coerced or out right raped; either way, it will take patience on both their parts to overcome that history.
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Interesting first chapter, decided to read because I found it was linked to the Pern stories. Will be interested to see how the story develops.
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Another person added to the group, and he appears to be good as well. Why so much gold for a boy with no memory of his past? Agree that neither a spell or artifact is rarely good or evil in and of itself; it is how the spell or item is used that determines the outcome.
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Knowledge for the sake of power is often misused and corrupted. In the learning there is a process and often that is needed to truly understand what the knowledge is and how to use it properly.
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I wonder if those around the necromancer were his actual family, did he raise them from the dead, after going mad with the power he acquired? Excellent chapter.
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I too expected the fight with the spiders to be more involved. I have to wonder what is drawing all the necromancer issues to this group, what about them is pulling that type of negative energy toward them. Being at peace with your actions can help you in more ways than you can ever imagine.
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Interesting chapter, but I felt this was a little off key, or rushed maybe. It did not flow as well as the previous chapters had.
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No new addition, but the group seems to be melding into a fine form. Excellent chapter.
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A merry band seems to be forming; wonder who the next to join will be?
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The desire to send the friend away to protect her; and the fact of becoming ill on his first kill shows a kind heart. That being said, a kind heart is often not the winner when fighting to the death, you can give to much to others to protect or spare them and not see what you need to see to save yourself.
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An interesting start to what appears to be the start of a long journey and adventure.
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Loved the sparing, especially since none of those involved knew who he was. Some good suggestions by Adan in the War Room, maybe he understands more than he thinks.
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Finding who can be trusted and who has to be watched will be among the hardest things that Adan will have to do. Hopefully, Roku will help him with this; a feline's instincts are usually spot on.
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I swear, the second he showed up in white robes, I just knew he was destined to die. This was a twist that I would never have seen coming, well done. At least Dennet and Jacob went together, and maybe that is all that can be asked in the end.
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Great chapter, I love the innocence of Roku, but I have to wonder how long that will last. Like most felines; Roku really doesn't like water. As to your question, I believe this maybe the first of your stories that I have read, although won't swear to it; as I read a lot. In this story, I think that both Adan and Roku are very interesting but want to get further into the story before I give an answer.
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An excellent second chapter, knew information added; but so much still left to uncover. Curious about the idea of if there is a fight to flee, what was all the training for; unless the master expects more than the pupil can endure.
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A truly interesting start to this story, can't wait to see what you do with it next.
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What's next? -- After Spirit of Fire
centexhairysub replied to Stellar's topic in Stellar's Fan Club's Topics
I went with Veil of Shadow, more because I think you might need to let your muses marinate on just how to continue, or finish, Spirit of Fire. That said, I truly believe you should work on what you feel is trying to come out. -
Loved this story from start to finish, yet not at the true end even yet...
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Truly an epic chapter, so many revelations and yet so much left undone.
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An interesting start; but so many unanswered questions already...
