Cid (working title) - 18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen

Valentine’s Day. Not a day that usually sat well with Cid in general. He never got the overpriced flowers, the jewelry ads, the candy, the sex toys, or whatever other crap they couldn’t move fast enough in retail they shoved down people’s throats to get them to buy it in bulk for one freakin’ day.

In grade school, things were different and better. He’d get the most valentines from the girls in his class. His hair was long, and black as night. His true eye color was a dark brown and everyone was drawn to them. He was the smartest and most creative kid in class.

But that all changed in high school. His foster family changed again and times got tough. He had to work in a drug store and sell most of the local candy and cards that the locals insisted they needed on that day. Not that he didn’t love chocolate, he did, but Valentine’s Day never held too much of a special place in his heart.

The last two weeks had actually gone pretty well; Cid met up with Kellen and they studied like mad for the economics class. Both of their grades had improved and participation was up as well. He could honestly say at least two facets of this college thing were doing ok; art and economics. Well, the studying anyway.

“Hey, speed demon.” Kellen’s tease broke him out of his internal reverie as they reached the line for the cafeteria. “I thought you’d wait for me.”

Oh shit, he did say that. “Sorry, just wanted to get some chow.”

Kellen rolled his eyes. “No worries. Just wait for me next time. It’s V-Day ya know and your buddy might be looking for a hookup.”

That’s right…that Kurt monster. “Damn. You’re right. I was hoping I’d miss him again but he’s pretty random.”

“Exactly. Think two steps ahead of the enemy, always.” Kellen sighed. “So, what looks least-disgusting today?”

Cid shrugged. “I dunno. At least they have cookies though.” He pointed to the heart-shaped iced sugar cookies at the front of the line. His artist’s eye picked up every flaw of the makeshift cursive writing. Such a lost art he thought…but he could do 15 times better than they did and he was right.

“Sweet.” Kellen cocked a brow. “I’ll get you one, if you want. I have a serious sweet tooth.”

Now what to say to that? “No…it’s cool. I don’t need it. I ate enough candy as a kid to last me a lifetime.” He brushed it off.

“You sure? They’re buy one get one.”

Aw hell, why not? “Fine. Gimme the free one.” He jested and Kellen bumped his arm.

“Dude, chillax. Now to find some real grub.”

They made their way through the food line and took a seat at the furthest table they could. After a few bites, Cid put his food down and stood. “Dude, you inspired me. Be right back.” He headed off down the hallway to the bathroom.

It was super crowded in the hallway and there was a short line for the mens’ room but it moved pretty quick. Every time he was alone he feared Kurt would find him but his obstinate side made him want to get over the ‘threat’ of him and not have to be tethered to Kellen’s side. Like that was a bad thing? Not at all, the guy was smart and funny and full of Scottish charms. But no way was he gay; he was just friends and that’s where things would stay. For good.

Luckily, Cid managed to get back to the cafeteria and didn’t see Kurt at all; but he did catch a glimpse of Billy…with Frank. Good! He was moving on. But was he? Kellen was just a friend, a straight ally and classmate and that was it. That’s all he had, right? He’d let Billy go out of fear and luckily found shelter under the Scottish flagbearer.

Then why did he want to bolt from the room?

He sat again and started in on his lunch without a word.

“Dude? You ok? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Kellen asked.

Cid jerked his head in the direction of the window and Kellen nodded. “Ah. Got it. The infamous Billy and his buddy Frank.”

“Yeah.”

“We can bail if you want.”

Now there was a great offer! “I’m all for that. He needs to be with Frank and not talk to me anymore anyway. I made that pretty damn clear.”

Kellen raised his brows. “Fair enough. Let’s go back to my room and warm up. I’m even cold today!”

They packed up their lunches and trudged through the snow to get across to the dorm halls. After they got inside and got settled in the nice, warm room, Cid felt like he could relax a little.

“Your room is kinda my hideout, man.” He admitted. “But we’ll need to goto mine too. I have a coffeemaker.”

Kellen grinned, but Cid didn’t know why. “I know you do. You’re a coffeehound if I ever met one.”

They fell silent as their lunches were unpacked and eaten. Soon the wrappers were in the trash and Cid took a seat on the bed and pulled his backpack up to join him. “So, I guess we’ll study again?”

“That sounds good to me.” Kellen admitted.

Cid dug around in his backpack for his book and notes, when a pop of color caught his eye. He furrowed his brow and tried to figure out what he was seeing. Was that..yellow? Wtf? He all but emptied his pack and arranged the items on Kellen’s bed before he reached in and extracted the item which he held up and looked at his friend.

“What the…?”

Kellen grinned. “It’s called a flower. A rose to be exact.” He explained.

Duh, dumbshit, he knew it was a rose. He didn’t know what the yellow meant though; he’d only seen red.

“I know it’s a flower ya doofus.” He teased. “Where did it come from? Why do I have it?”

“Aughhhhh Cid, Cid, Cid.” Kellen shook his head and walked over to join him. “It came from the florist, and before you freak out, yellow means friendship.” He brushed his fingers along the petals and looked into Cid’s eyes. “It also means I care.”

He cared? About what? Him? Economics?

“Kell…” Cid fought for words but his dry throat made it difficult. No one had ever bought him flowers. Ever.

“Relax…friendship. But I like you a lot and care about what happens to you, Cid. Why do you think I protect you from that bastard?”

It did add up, Kellen was his friend, classmate, and bodyguard.

“You’re a great friend, Kellen.” He admitted. “I’ve never met a straight guy so willing to help a gay dude like me.” He risked a lot just admitting that but figured that his friend knew, just because of Billy. It was so obvious, right?

Kellen was quiet for a long moment and his expression was unreadable. He walked away and went to his pack and pulled out two heart-shaped cookies from the cafeteria and presented them to Cid.

“I figured we could use these to give us a sugar buzz on this crazy ‘holiday’. He used air quotes. Apparently Kellen wasn’t a fan either, which only deepened their growing bond.

He didn’t say much, but looked at the cookie and traced his finger over the bad writing and he could smell the icing’s sweetness and couldn’t wait to taste it. He bit off a corner and savored the taste and texture of the baked good.

“You did know I’m gay, right?” he tried to get Kellen’s gaze back and was worried that he’d gotten so quiet. For once, the introvert was worried about someone else. Now that was a switch and a feat unto itself.

Kellen nodded. “Yeah, I figured that out pretty quick. But I gotta say, your powers of observation aren’t very good.”

Cid fell silent and his eyes widened. “Huh?” was all he could muster to say. He saw Kellen move a few inches closer and held up the yellow rose between them. His green eyes were clear and gorgeous, like a Scottish field, and his face had a bit of growth on it; a fledgling beard in the works.

“I guess I never announced it to the world; I’ve kept to myself actually before I met you. But we’ve gotten a little closer and I feel comfortable with you. At least, I’m starting to.”

What announcement? Cid felt his face blush. His thoughts were a mile a minute and he looked Kellen up and down and sniffed the rose. “What?” he coughed out.

“I’m gay too, Cid.” Was all Kellen had to say and Cid felt a wave of relief paired with a jolt of fear. What if the others knew way before him? He wasn’t into being pda-out and proud, but was Kellen? Is that what he even wanted? What did he want? Why couldn’t his thoughts slow down for a millisecond? Holy fuck he needed to calm down.

“Omigod…” he cupped his mouth and tried to stop the spell of hyperventilation that wanted to overtake him. “I didn’t know…I…”

Kellen slapped his friend’s back. “Relax, hey, hey…shhhh. Chillax, dude.”

Cid chided himself for acting like this, whatever this was. He couldn’t deny that he liked Kellen too, but had always thought he was straight and never even dared himself to think beyond that. Plus any residual feelings for Billy were tangled up in there too. He was just dead scared.

“I had no idea!” he managed. “I…I like you, Kellen.” He admitted out loud. He felt the cookie in his hand. “Thank you for the cookies.” He grinned. “It’s so awesome that you’re gay too. I’m….relieved!”

Kellen sniffed the rose and held up his cookie in his hand. “A toast then? To friendship?” he offered. “Plus one more thing?”

Cid froze mid-bite. Here it comes.

“A real hug and let me buy us dinner? We can make this day special…in our own way.”

“But…but that’s it? A hug and dinner? Nothing more?” Cid wanted to make sure. “I like you but I can’t…” here came his famous speech again.

“Relax…no pressures. If I can make one promise to you I’ll never, ever pressure you into anything you don’t want. I’d rather spit on the Scottish flag.”

A laugh was shared between them and Cid ate the rest of the cookie. “Those were good cookies.” He confessed. His eyes barely left the sight of his friend and he felt safe, warm, and very cared for. “You’re a terrific guy, Kellen. Y-“

“Shhhh.” Kellen put two fingers over his lips. “I’ve heard your speech and it’s sad. You are worth it, Cid Walker. I don’t think I could do better, honestly. If I could, I don’t really want to find out.”

Cid felt his eyes water and he blinked the tears away. That was the nicest thing anyone had ever said to him. “I pray you’re right.” He whispered.

Kellen shook his head, finished his cookie, and took Cid into his arms for the longest hug he’d ever had in his life. He wouldn’t dare let go first. Not a chance!