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    Puppilull
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Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Puppilull's poetry prompts - 11. Poetry prompt 8 - Quatrains

Though the sun is still warm upon our skin

The leaves are speaking about something new

For something is changing from deep within

Against the clearest sky of vibrant blue

 

Sadness so fierce when I see you depart

Like a dear friend who turned from me in pain

Though far away you live here in my heart

As budding hope after cold winter's reign

A bit on the sad side, this one. Had my reasons, but I think the cold winter is over now...
Copyright © 2016 Puppilull; All Rights Reserved.
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Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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I had my own personal interpretation of this... bought up one of those memories... It's a lovely poem that resonates with me... cheers... Gary

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On 09/22/2015 04:17 AM, Headstall said:

I had my own personal interpretation of this... bought up one of those memories... It's a lovely poem that resonates with me... cheers... Gary

This unexpectedly turned out a bit more personal than I planned, so I'm glad you could get something out of it anyway. But that's what so great about poetry, isn't it? I intend to say one thing, you hear another and that's not only ok, but amazing!

 

Thanks for your review!

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It's a very tender poem. I guess it's autumnal in spirit as well as in form.

 

On thing I want to praise right off is how natural your flow is, imo. That extends not only to a smooth metre, but also to the selections of rhymes. They are all very comfortable to read and fall right into place. Another accomplishment is how you did not create a quatrain of four separate sentences, or even of two sentences put to together. You have done the hard work of making one sentence sing over the course of 40 syllables, and I know from personal experience that that is not easy.

 

Very well done, and thanks for taking the prompt challenge!

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On 09/22/2015 05:52 AM, AC Benus said:

It's a very tender poem. I guess it's autumnal in spirit as well as in form.

 

On thing I want to praise right off is how natural your flow is, imo. That extends not only to a smooth metre, but also to the selections of rhymes. They are all very comfortable to read and fall right into place. Another accomplishment is how you did not create a quatrain of four separate sentences, or even of two sentences put to together. You have done the hard work of making one sentence sing over the course of 40 syllables, and I know from personal experience that that is not easy.

 

Very well done, and thanks for taking the prompt challenge!

Your review makes me so happy! I have been struggling with my staccato tendency, so I tried very hard to not break the poem up in separate lines. I'm so glad it showed! Reading them out loud is a good way to check the flow and also to see if the rhymes feel natural.

 

Good rhymes (much like good men...) are hard to find. They can be awkward or too slick to leave the right impression. I try to make them almost unnoticeable, apart from the effect they have on flow. A lot to think about...

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On 09/22/2015 05:58 AM, JohnAR said:

I guess "Summer" can also be a person's name.

I felt your sadness.

Yes, it sort of turned into something else, about loss but with a hope for reconnection. It's sometimes hard when things change...

 

Thanks for your review!

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