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Over When It's Over


Sasha Distan

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So, my husband has gone away again. Work need him to be in Canada for four whole weeks. He left this morning. Neither of us even pretended to be anything other than devastated. We don't do well apart, over ten years of seeing each other everyday, living together, buying a house and raising our boy together will do that to a couple.

 

Four long weeks.

 

Don't get me wrong, I'm more grateful than anyone outside my head could know for the life I have, for the love we share, for the job which offers him happiness, fulfilment, and financial security, but four weeks without him hurts. Hurts more than anyone outside my head could know. But I have to be strong for our son, he has to not be upset that Dada is gone for now. He'll be back, and we'll be waiting.

 

But I swear to Gods everyone else is scared of that the people who tell me "the time will fly by" all need punching in the mouth. Trust me, last time he was gone, three weeks felt exactly like three weeks. This time, four weeks, will feel exactly like four weeks. Each day is a long day, each night is a long night, and I'm sitting here now, looking at the stairs and knowing when I get up there, the bed will be cold, and there won't be a light on in Cris's office or the sound of tapping. No, there is no joy to be had in sleeping alone.

 

The time will not fly by, and when he gets home again, I will break down and cry. Big strong cowboys are allowed to cry on their doorsteps, trust me on this.

 

Oh, and someone at work asked me if I was worried about Cris being away so long, and the temptations of long distance travel for work. I laughed at her, because apparently you're not allowed to deck your colleagues. It would be funny, if it wasn't so fucking offensive.

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I get it. My husband was gone for a week for work, and it was a week. And the bed was cold and the house too quiet. Just me and the pup. 

 

Yeah, I get it. Hang in there. 

 

Cuz then he was there, standing beside the jeep, waiting for me when he got home. Picked me up from work. And at that moment, there was me and him, and we were the only two people in the world. 

 

Hang in there. 

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You're right, of course, four weeks is a long time to not have Cris by your side. 

 

One thing you won't be without, I'm sure is knowing that his love knows no bounds. You can't cuddle up to it and it may not warm your bed at night, but I'm hoping it will warm your heart. 

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I was lucky that my hubby's old job meant he was only away at night. But, those nights he worked i didn't sleep. I know exactly what you mean about a cold bed. And it's too quiet as well. 

 

Time never goes fast and i hope you find things to keep yourself busy to help the time going by not hurt too much. 

 

As for the colleague? I would have dropped something 'accidentally' on her. from a good height. Trust me I've done it, it works 0:) Well, as long as you don't get caught of course. :) 

 

Hang in there and plan how you're going to welcome your man home :hug: 

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I have the worse time with missing the person I love. As hard as I try, it affects everything I do. My sympathies, Sasha. No platitudes. :hug:

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Sasha,

 

The days will be long and the nights cold, but remember the good times will return one day sooner each night.  Try to think warm thoughts, keep your boy warm and happy, seek friends and company (no not that kind)  :).  Use the phone and computer to keep in touch and share things about each  others day and most of all, tell each other you miss them and you love them and you will see each other one day sooner.....  The time will pass at its own speed, but it will pass and he will return to you.   Hugs and warm thoughts for both of you   :hug:

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I maybe have a suggestion, if you want one. As a writing person write love letters and perhaps Cris likes to answer them. Thats what B. and I are fond of. Sitting down, taking good paper and a pen not using modern communication.
B. sometimes even has no possibility to use internet or telephone, but there is most often a postbox everywhere and I love this little box with letters, I am hoarding like a treasure under my bed, even get butterflies in my belly, go looking into our mailbox.

:-)

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I can't even stand, when hubby is working on Saturdays or has the late night shift. Time drags on, suddenly the kids are all in bed and asleep and it's too quiet.

There are some funny colleagues everywhere, hubby's coworker said him he should always phone home, before he actually arrives, so I have time to remove evidence :D It was so weird, I had to laugh him in the face :D

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