Jump to content
  • entries
    44
  • comments
    803
  • views
    10,034

Down Time

Mikiesboy

Entry posted by Mikiesboy

1,248 views

 Share

Many of you suffer from depression, like i do. 

 

it's  a daily fight, a life filled with cycles of sadness, blackness, like carrying sandbags when it is at it's worst. usually i shut down, don't talk, don't work, the real me is flattened under the living darkness. Michael, my husband, said, as does my shrink, to try writing about it, speaking out, though writing is the last thing i really want to do. 

 

sleep. sleep is what i want to do, only that. But i can't, there is work, right? and Michael and home. shit still needs doing no matter how you feel, right? that's what drugs are for!! a nice anti depressant for breakfast!

 

i take it, the pill.  along with my regular meds.  i resent them you know.. i really do. the small handful of pills i am given daily. 

 

Michael doles them out like a nurse on the psych ward. 

 

That sounds mean. i mean He does it for me, cuz he loves me, he cares and he knows ignoring the pills is how i cope with the medical issues i have. 

 

i take them. but i still hate them.  maybe that's a good thing.  the hate.  means i'm still alive and fighting, right?

 

somewhere in this long, dark, tunnel i am still fighting

 

  • Like 6
  • Love 7
 Share

14 Comments

Recommended Comments

  • Popular Comment
MacGreg

MacGreg 39,552

Posted

  • Popular Comment

I'm here for you, boy, even through the downturns. 

  • Like 6
  • Love 1
  • Popular Comment
Carlos Hazday

Carlos Hazday 115,803

Posted

  • Popular Comment

You hang in there, you hear me? If I'm staring 60 in the face, I expect you to do the same when the time comes. Even if your road's had more potholes than mine.

 

Mental health days are good for us. I had one yesterday when cooler temperatures and a day-long drizzle soured my mood. So what if I wasted most of the day watching Property Brothers? I've accomplished more today so far than I did all day yesterday. Now, if you excuse me, I need to shower and go flirt with have my hair cut by a muscle bear. Write or call if you want to talk to a different person for a change.

  • Like 5
  • Love 2
  • Haha 2
Brayon

Brayon 40,953

Posted

Lots of virtual hugs, tim. :hug:

 

Jared Padalecki, who plays Sam Winchester on Supernatural, fights Depression as well. He has several sayings, he does as part of a mantra, that I've adopted a few of.

 

Always Keep Fighting

Love Yourself First

 

Those are the two I follow.

  • Like 5
mogwhy

mogwhy 29,863

Posted

i am glad you still are fighting

  • Like 5
Mikiesboy

Mikiesboy 143,937

Posted

6 hours ago, MacGreg said:

I'm here for you, boy, even through the downturns. 

i know Sir and i'm grateful

  • Like 3
  • Love 1
Mikiesboy

Mikiesboy 143,937

Posted

3 hours ago, Carlos Hazday said:

You hang in there, you hear me? If I'm staring 60 in the face, I expect you to do the same when the time comes. Even if your road's had more potholes than mine.

 

Mental health days are good for us. I had one yesterday when cooler temperatures and a day-long drizzle soured my mood. So what if I wasted most of the day watching Property Brothers? I've accomplished more today so far than I did all day yesterday. Now, if you excuse me, I need to shower and go flirt with have my hair cut by a muscle bear. Write or call if you want to talk to a different person for a change.

those pot holes behind me don't matter much anymore.. not much .. i try and look ahead.  i know you flirted shamelessly ..

 

thanks, C xo

  • Like 4
  • Love 1
Mikiesboy

Mikiesboy 143,937

Posted

2 hours ago, BHopper2 said:

Lots of virtual hugs, tim. :hug:

 

Jared Padalecki, who plays Sam Winchester on Supernatural, fights Depression as well. He has several sayings, he does as part of a mantra, that I've adopted a few of.

 

Always Keep Fighting

Love Yourself First

 

Those are the two I follow.

those are good things, thanks for sharing xo

  • Like 3
  • Love 1
Mikiesboy

Mikiesboy 143,937

Posted

2 hours ago, mogwhy said:

i am glad you still are fighting

i'll stop when i'm dead..

 

thank you

  • Like 2
  • Love 2
  • Popular Comment
dughlas

dughlas 109,647

Posted

  • Popular Comment

Mum and I send you our love little brother.

  • Like 6
Mikiesboy

Mikiesboy 143,937

Posted

4 hours ago, dughlas said:

Mum and I send you our love little brother.

thank you very much. hugs for you both xoxo

  • Like 4
  • Love 1
MichaelS36

MichaelS36 25,662

Posted

11 hours ago, Carlos Hazday said:

You hang in there, you hear me? If I'm staring 60 in the face, I expect you to do the same when the time comes. Even if your road's had more potholes than mine.

 

Mental health days are good for us. I had one yesterday when cooler temperatures and a day-long drizzle soured my mood. So what if I wasted most of the day watching Property Brothers? I've accomplished more today so far than I did all day yesterday. Now, if you excuse me, I need to shower and go flirt with have my hair cut by a muscle bear. Write or call if you want to talk to a different person for a change.

You had better be around for his 60th! 

  • Like 5
MichaelS36

MichaelS36 25,662

Posted

Michael doles them out like a nurse on the psych ward. 

 

Long as I don't have to wear the uniform. ..don't have the legs for a dress!

  • Like 2
  • Haha 3
dughlas

dughlas 109,647

Posted

11 hours ago, Mikiesboy said:

thank you very much. hugs for you both xoxo

Mum says to tell you love and hugs from grannies are the best.

  • Like 3
Mikiesboy

Mikiesboy 143,937

Posted

1 hour ago, dughlas said:

Mum says to tell you love and hugs from grannies are the best.

:) i'm sure that's true .. and it's nice being adopted... :) 

  • Like 3

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...