Even Stars Die

[LJH]

Any advice will do. Always will reciprocate a read. I'm writing the end chapters and playing around with endings...such fun. But I'm reposting Even Stars Die and adding new chapters and tighter, leaner writing. The first two chapters are posted. Constructive crits and reviews are always a good place to start. Hope you enjoy the story as much as I had fun writing it and seeking direction from all my friends and fellow writers here on GA. have a blessed xmas and a perfect new year.

 

Louis J

 

 

[AnytaSunday]

Louis!!!

 

How did I not get that the last chapters of this were up?!!! Well, glad I found them.

 

 

OMG, he was a ghost! AND was one of them killed in the accident. This is so sad. Yet the end is so sweet--although still sad.

 

 

The story really whisked you away when reading, it really defied expectations. I loved the twists in that and I think your writing style is easily approachable and fun to read. I like that you give us just enough hints to detail a scene but keep the action speeding along taking us to the point of each scene quickly.

 

I like the revised first two chapters--it feels like it fits the story better now, I think that is to do with the added foreshadowing. good. In particular the lines: Alex doesn't know me but it seems we've known each other a lifetime. Alex scares me. And I'm drawn to it.

 

Though Alex really goes for the lies with the birthday talk there, huh? Or was the 25th party also the night when he died or shortly thereafter? which makes him quite a bit older than Keegs, right? Maybe add in the photo of newspaper article at the end that he was in costume? To show it happening soon after that night, or alternatively just to give us an extra link to the beginning of the story? Just a thought. Probably not important.

 

Chapter three felt entirely new. I liked this. There was humor here.

 

Wow, thanks for writing and sharing this with us, Louis!

 

Wonderful.

[Nephylim]

The last few chapters were just totally perfect, there were so much in there and the last chapter!!!! I don't think you could have written a better one.

 

I am in awe of this story

 

 

Oh and did I mention how much I love Alex

 

It is kind of ripe for a sequel too don't you think ?

 

 

[LJH]

@ Anyta...beautifully observed...and your observation brings me to another quirky fact in the tale. Keegs had the accident at age 15. He is now 22. Alex died at the age 22 at 7 years to that and he is now 29. So he could not have celebrated a 25th....thank you for that. Right throughout the first 7 or 8 c hapters there are cryptic lines that suggest all is not as it seems with Alex and you noticed that. Of-course it's a subtle build up. Take a look at that beautiful build up to the antagonist's madness in The Shining...only Steven King has got it down pat. I also tried to be subtle spiritually. One doesn't expect Alex to break down in parayer but it is inevitable that he will...I played with a few endings, and when it comae down to actually writing it, it just flowed out. My cvharacters didn't stop, and I hop[e they're not one dimensional, instead, they became dynamic entities that wrote the story themselves.

 

Thank you for enjoying it.

 

@ Neph...You are Alex's number one fan...he told me he wants to meet with you to tell you a few things about himself. He says he's not lost, but if he was, he'd love to be lost with you. Both you and Anyta have been such wonderful inspirations to me because I have enjoyed reading your stories so much too. And Neph, forgive me if I don't comment on the vamp stuff, but I'll get to it. I promise.

 

Thank you both for your thoughts and sharing

 

hugs

[Andrew Q Gordon]

Okay, took me a bit to realize you had everything up and posted, Sorry, guess I wasn't as attentive as I could have been.

 

I understood from prior chapters that Alex had died and come back, but I didn't realize he was killed by Keegan's dad, nice twist.

 

As I said in the review on your story, the end is great partly because it left so much unresolved; the parents & Keegan, the other passenger who died, the Meyers, what about Greece? Thanks for leaving it all to our imagination.

 

So much resolved so fast it was truly good stuff.

 

I think I read in a status update of yours about how this was going to be a movie, True?? If so, that is pretty great. best of luck.

 

Andy

[Nephylim]

@ Anyta...beautifully observed...and your observation brings me to another quirky fact in the tale. Keegs had the accident at age 15. He is now 22. Alex died at the age 22 at 7 years to that and he is now 29. So he could not have celebrated a 25th....thank you for that. Right throughout the first 7 or 8 c hapters there are cryptic lines that suggest all is not as it seems with Alex and you noticed that. Of-course it's a subtle build up. Take a look at that beautiful build up to the antagonist's madness in The Shining...only Steven King has got it down pat. I also tried to be subtle spiritually. One doesn't expect Alex to break down in parayer but it is inevitable that he will...I played with a few endings, and when it comae down to actually writing it, it just flowed out. My cvharacters didn't stop, and I hop[e they're not one dimensional, instead, they became dynamic entities that wrote the story themselves.

 

Thank you for enjoying it.

 

@ Neph...You are Alex's number one fan...he told me he wants to meet with you to tell you a few things about himself. He says he's not lost, but if he was, he'd love to be lost with you. Both you and Anyta have been such wonderful inspirations to me because I have enjoyed reading your stories so much too. And Neph, forgive me if I don't comment on the vamp stuff, but I'll get to it. I promise.

 

Thank you both for your thoughts and sharing

 

hugs

 

You really shouldn't feel obliged to read my stuff. That's not why i commented on yours. I really enjoyed the story for it's own sake. I'm glad that Alex likes me. I was wondering if he could be pursuaded to turn bi. I love dead guys. But I kind of like Keegs too, although he is a bit of a twat sometimes, so I won't try to get between them. I wouldn't mind being lost with him... just for a while though