Trials and Tribulations

[Billy Martin]

I apologize for the delay on the story. Some offline issues have come up that has taken priority over the story. I'm sorry. But as soon as I can, I will pump out the second half of the story for you. Lets just call this an... intermission.

[Benji]

I apologize for the delay on the story. Some offline issues have come up that has taken priority over the story. I'm sorry. But as soon as I can, I will pump out the second half of the story for you. Lets just call this an... intermission.

 

[Billy Martin]

I'm sorry?

[Billy Martin]

Okay, sorry for the delay, but chapter 13 is now in the hands of my team for the polishing and corrections. So, in a few days it will be posted. Again, I'm sorry for the delay, but sometimes real life gets in the way.

[Billy Martin]

No April Fools, Chapter 13 will be posted this coming week!

[Billy Martin]

Chapter 13 is now posted as promised

[Benji]

......... Great chapter, JT's father is a real piece of work. I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. I wonder if that is it for JT, and he heads for Juvie? But his dad is the more dangerous one, so we have more of this story to see where it heads to. I'm thinking of that something is going to happen at the overlook!

[Billy Martin]

Thank you Benji. We all might be surprised with the next chapter. Hang on for the ride

[Billy Martin]

You know, I don't mind answering any questions you might have. And I'm always willing to listen what the readers desire as far as the direction of the story. Just leave a post, let's chat

[Billy Martin]

I noticed the reviews are down on this chapter. I'm really sorry I wasn't able to get this chapter out faster than I did. Please forgive me.

[Bleu]

Don't take it personally and don't be hard on yourself, Billy. Readers are a fickle bunch And no need to apologize.

 

In any case, don't lose your drive to write... the award you received proves that people are interested in your story

[LJH]

I wanted to read a story that would create a tsunami of emotions. I wanted a story to fill a void I had been missing so much. I wanted red, yellow, black and grey. I found this story, eventually. Trials and Tribulations by Billy Brat has everything. Boy meets boy. Boy loves boy. Strong, feisty guys. It has crime. Hard boiled. A touch of police procedure so far. It could attract both male and female readers. It is also a thriller where lives are placed in danger. Fast paced. As a romance, it is written well. Loosely. Fairly detailed descriptions. Sensuous. And above all, these sensuous descriptions are often tied directly to emotional responses. It has suspense, where the plot is always more important than setting, with brief physical descriptions. Crisp. Underrated. The tone at times, is chilly.

 

Before I go onto the characters, let me say something about the setting here. It’s a school. A normal, living, breathing school. It’s a small town, just as alive with it’s own culture. Hence, the setting in Trials and Tribulations will define the characters. And it does, in heaped spoonfuls.

 

Quote

 

I’m a fifteen year old sophomore in a small town high school nestled away in the Appalachian Mountains of Eastern Kentucky. I guess you could say I lived in the heart of the coalfields where coal is king. Everything revolves around coal. The stores, the restaurants, the banks, the vocational schools, even the churches are all here for the miners and their families. Most boys grow up knowing that one day they’ll be miners or working in some way supporting the mines or miners. But I have no intentions of walking down that road.

 

I had finally decided that I would somewhat follow in my father’s footsteps and become a lawyer. But, I would find a job in a big city somewhere and get away from small towns like Pine Hills. I’ve lived here all my life; and the one thing that bugged the crap out of me was everyone knew everyone’s business.

 

I didn’t want everyone knowing my business, because I had a big secret, I’m gay.

 

 

The naïve character of JT and his father; the over the top character that is Joey’s violent and abusive father, are crucial in this setting. I found, whilst reading, that the writer has weaved the setting to form his characters into what they are. His lead characters, Andy and Joey, use the current environment to further the story, to create obstacles, to move them out of their comfort zones and to make us believe that what is happening is possible. The environment is not unique, by no means. There is a plethora of stories that take place in small towns and schools. But, Billy Brat has made the setting unique by placing one eccentricity. One observation:

 

Quote:

 

Most boys grow up knowing that one day they’ll be miners or working in some way supporting the mines or miners.

 

Once again, before I move onto the characters, I’d like to say something about description in Trials and Tribulations. I like to read stories that show instead of tell. The trend in modern fiction is to stay away from gilded prose as far as possible. Simplicity is the key to description now. Maybe Billy Brat knows that he is competing for a place in a crowded market. The internet, television, movies, magazines, newspapers etc., have all taken their toll and today’s reader will not tolerate long flowery sentences and page upon page of boring backstory. Having said this, Billy Brat knows that it is even more important to make his descriptions work for him and he packs a punch with a single word or phrase…

 

Quote:

 

For the second time today, I saw the back of that curly blond head.

 

I guess it was time to pay the piper.

 

His shirt had streaks of blood across his back.

 

 

This writer weaves the details in and doesn’t waste time writing them in long blocks.

 

Quote:

 

I really did have a love/hate relationship with this town. I mean when people were hurting, generally everyone rallied behind them with all kinds of help. But, if you cross some moralistic line, holy hell would descend upon you from every direction and from everyone. I had no intentions of crossing that line publicly.

 

Description is all about creating exciting sentences. Sentences that move the reader where he wants them to go. The writer becomes the artist. He is taking his reader on an emotional journey in this story. He wants us to encounter people and places we have never met and probably never will. Mr Brat makes this memorable for us. He has created emotional images in our minds, forming a perfect picture, without interrupting the flow of the story. From locker room to stadium to the school to the church, he does it with ease and class.

 

Now onto the characters: I don’t want to read about just anybody. I want to read about interesting somebodies, characters capable of evoking in me some measure of emotional response. This writer has achieved that. Why do I say this? Well, it’s very simple. I demand that homo fictus be more handsome, or ugly. Joey is handsome, so is Andy. I see JT and his father, and Joey’s father as over the top ugly inside and outside. Homo fictus must be more ruthless, nobler. JT is ruthless, so are his father and Joey’s father. I see Andy’s father, our Judge, as being noble, and so is Roger. Homo fictus must be more forgiving, brave, or cowardly. Andy’s father is forgiving. The principal of the school is forgiving; some of the town folk are forgiving. Andy is the bravest soul I know, but then Roger and Joey are also brave. JT and his father and Joey’s father are cowardly. Homo fictus must have hotter passions. Colder anger. Fights more. Loves more. Changes more. Has more sex. Lots more sex. Homo fictus has more of everything. Even if he is plain, dull and boring, he’ll be more extraordinary in his plainness, his dullness and boringness than real life counterparts. His characters have stature; the Judge. Presence, Andy. His characters are memorable, because Billy Brat knows them inside out as well as he knows his sister or father or mother. Andy and Joey are people I care about. JT is someone I care about too, because I actually hate him, and yes this is an emotional response and I know he is being forced to commit acts of violence by his father. Roger, I love Roger for he is noble and wise and funny and easy going and he takes care of his friends. Andy’s family is just such a beautiful family to care about. The story is essentially Joey’s story but it is also their story, each and every one of them and I want to know what happens to them for their motivations drive this story. Andy is made powerful enough to make his own decisions. Joey is the centre of attraction. The other characters talk about him all the time. They think about him. Joey’s actions as well as Andy’s actions are important and memorable. They incite the reader to respond to every action they make. The reader is sympathetic towards them.

 

Having said all this, it is clear that I love this story. There are gremlins, sure. But even published stories have gremlins. The editing on this story is first class. I would like to have seen a lot more line by line edits to make the story free of all imperfections. I have this advice: once you have completed the revision of the last edit, return it to your editor for the go ahead to publish. Do not publish without his go ahead. This way, the editor will see where the gremlins are for he must read it.

 

This is a powerhouse of a story. Absolutely stunning. If it is true I cannot say, but it smacks of authenticity.

 

I would recommend this story to everyone.

[Billy Martin]

Don't take it personally and don't be hard on yourself, Billy. Readers are a fickle bunch And no need to apologize.

 

In any case, don't lose your drive to write... the award you received proves that people are interested in your story

 

Thank you and you're right. I just don't like to let people down. I guess the best way is to write awesome chapters

[Benji]

........Yeah, don't worry about the small stuff, leave an evil cliffhanger in a chapter and you'll get plenty of grief!!

[comicfan]

Meanwhile your beta will try to play catch up and make sure it continues out at a steady pace.

[Billy Martin]

Louis Harris.... WOW. What can I say? WOW. Thank you for writing your review and recommendation. Your review blew me out of the water. Everyone author dreams for a review like you have given. You have let me mostly speechless, and anyone that knows me can tell you that's hard to do.

 

Again, THANK YOU!

[Billy Martin]

Meanwhile your beta will try to play catch up and make sure it continues out at a steady pace.

 

Wayne, you're always awesome and the best beta there is!!!

[Billy Martin]

Okay folks, the first draft of chapter 14 is completed, just a few more days

[Billy Martin]

The next chapter is now with my awesome editor Ryan now. So, it won't be long until Chapter 14 is posted.

[comicfan]

I'm trying not to keep your stuff too long Billy. Honest.

[Billy Martin]

Wayne, you're awesome and you know it! I don't know how you do it, but I think you're the best!

[Billy Martin]

Okay, I thought chapter 14 was ready, but I was sadly mistaken. However, the finishing touches are being done on it, and it shouldn't be long now, at least in the next few days

[comicfan]

Do what you have to, I already know how it is. lol. Advantages of a beta.

[Billy Martin]

Chapter 14 is now published. I hope everyone likes it and click on the "like It" option ,AND leaves a review. I really do like reading your thoughts on the story, chapter by chapter.

 

Thanks to all you awesome readers!!! YOU make it worth while

[Benji]

.................Well that was interesting, did not see the turn of events for JT, I should have expected though seeing that JT was so controlled by his father. We wait for that other shoe to fall, however the mythology/mysticism was lost when you brought in theocracy of the religious christian concept. You started out using 'spiritual' beings, but ended up pinpointing a secular G-D. Otherwise a great chapter!