[Altimexis] Love in a Chair--by Altimexis

[C James]

The emotional turmoil, and the sidestepping of grief was excellently done. I was amazed by it.

 

However, what amazed me the most was Brian's dissertation on how to find out if someone is gay. That was brilliant!

Sounds very realistic too.

 

The issue I see here is that Brian, to me, sounds to be in a state akin to denial; the reality of his situation hasn't hit him on an emotional level yet. When it does, watch out.

 

GREAT chapter!

 

CJ

[Bondwriter]

Yes, another fine chapter. Lots of hard facts, but the little couple makes it all the more emotional. And yes, Brian certainly has tough moments ahead.

[Altimexis]

I just wanted to say a quick "Hi" to Dylls and Brad, a couple of gay 15 yo boys in Manhattan who are a real life Brian and Aaron, respectively. It's good to know that my story is touching so many people, and that my portrayal is so real. To quote Dylls, "ur story touched my heart so much is made me start talking about how i feel and its funny the flash backs are starting to ease uo some." I'm gratified to be able to play a role in helping someone to cope with their own recovery from something like this. Not so coincidentally, Brian will discuss his own flashbacks during a counseling session toward the end of the story. My apology to Bondwriter and others who'd rather not know what's ahead, but I don't really think this is giving much away - it's just an example of the care I've put into making the story realistic.

 

Dylls and Brad, I wish you guys the best of luck. I hope to hear from you again as the story develops. If you're reading this, please feel free to post to this thread - I think all the readers would like to know what it's like in real life to be gay, out, proud and experiencing love in a chair for real. I know I would.

[dyllane and brad]

hi just to let you know both Brad and i love your story and i too can understand what the guys are going thorugh all our love and please keep writing dyllsnbradxxx123

[C James]

hi just to let you know both Brad and i love your story and i too can understand what the guys are going thorugh all our love and please keep writing dyllsnbradxxx123

 

Welcome to GA!!

[dyllane and brad]

Reviewer: dyllaneandbrad Signed Date: 03/24/07 - 11:04AM Title: LIFE IN A CHAIR

 

 

 

Life in a chair is not only well written but emotionally accurate portrayal of how the hopes, Fear, and lives of two teenaged boys cope with gay life with one of them able bodied and other in a wheelchair . You will I'm sure find yourselves on an emotional roller coaster ride that will have you going from happiness , sadness , anger , and even guilt . The strong underlying love that is so obvious throughout the story will touch the most hardened of hearts.

 

From a personal level I found myself feeling the both highs and lows of their relationship. The stresses and problems of being a young gay teen who is now in a wheel chair after an auto smash . Being told that I can no longer walk was not only scary but made me feel angry and withdraw.

 

The uncertainties about sex being too afraid to ask the question. The quiet reflection. Times of utter despair & loneness. The what if or he wont need me that will and often creep into relationships. Altimexis writes about these very topics and is able to bring forth the love shown by Aaron toward Brian, made me realize that I too could learn from the story and with my boyfriends help and love and encouragement that I too, sorry We both together could have a future. If you to know someone or is someone who is going through life in a chair, be it Gay, Lesbian, Straight or Bisexual then I can honestly hand on heart say please, please read this story and even if your not in the situation as both Brian, Aaron Brad and myself are in then you too will get something more then a good read.

[C James]

I really enjoyed Ch 17, and the obstacles faced by someone in a wheelchair were spot-on in my opinion.

I was in a wheelchair for a few weeks as a teenager, and I knew it was temporary so it wasn't the same thing, but the difficulties

are all too real.

 

There is something I'd like to add here; All too often, I've seen people in wheelchairs be avoided in public; people won't make eye contact. Making eye contact and smiling can mean a lot to a person, especially a person oft deprived of it, so I always make a point of doing so and suggest that others think on this issue too.

 

I was amazed that a 15 y/o would quote the ADA as Aaron did, but I can see why he's been reading (as mentioned in the text).

 

The one thing that blew my mind was Brian discussing Sex with his parents present!

 

BTW, one question regarding the exchange on HIV; isn't there a delay of up to a few months month between initial infection and the ability of a test to detect the infection?

 

Great chapter!

[Altimexis]

The one thing that blew my mind was Brian discussing Sex with his parents present!

 

BTW, one question regarding the exchange on HIV; isn't there a delay of up to a few months month between initial infection and the ability of a test to detect the infection?

 

Great chapter!

 

There is a reason for the discussion in front of the parents, and current recommendations are to test and then retest in 6 months. Aaron and Brian are pushing it by assuming they were already HIV negative, since they were complete virgins before they met. Much of this is discussed in the next chapter, and there is a lengthy disclaimer at the end.

[C James]

There is a reason for the discussion in front of the parents, and current recommendations are to test and then retest in 6 months. Aaron and Brian are pushing it by assuming they were already HIV negative, since they were complete virgins before they met. Much of this is discussed in the next chapter, and there is a lengthy disclaimer at the end.

 

I'm DELIGHTED to see that you will cover the HIV issue; A pet peeve of mine is stories wherein the protagonists get tested within hours

of risky behavior (willing or unwilling) and then are portrayed as being guaranteed HiV free.

 

Hmmmm, I can see where both Aaron and Brian already have risk factors for HiV given that they were in an accident and received medical treatment, Brian certainly, and there are likely other factors that I'm missing.

[Altimexis]

I'm DELIGHTED to see that you will cover the HIV issue; A pet peeve of mine is stories wherein the protagonists get tested within hours

of risky behavior (willing or unwilling) and then are portrayed as being guaranteed HiV free.

 

Hmmmm, I can see where both Aaron and Brian already have risk factors for HiV given that they were in an accident and received medical treatment, Brian certainly, and there are likely other factors that I'm missing.

 

Fortunately, the blood supply is so well tested that you're about a likely to get an STD from kissing. The risk isn't zero, but it's less than one in a million. I hadn't really included that in the story because, frankly, it's an insignificant part of the discussion.

 

My pet peeve is with authors who have their characters fastidiously use condoms for anal sex, but then suck each other off and swallow. This includes the vast majority of net authors out there. The fact is that oral sex is definitely unsafe without the use of condoms or a dental dam. People can and do transmit HIV, Hepatitis, Gonorrhea, Chlamydia and a host of other STDs and other viral diseases through oral sex. Even if Aaron and Brian were virgins before they met, they could still transmit Herpes Simplex type 1 to their partner's genitals. All of that said, there are reasons for wanting to include unprotected oral sex in Love in a Chair, particularly with respect to demonstrating functional sex in a paraplegic, so I needed an excuse for them to have unprotected oral sex, hence the need for the disclaimer.

[Bondwriter]

Cheers to this new chapter, that still manages to mix successfully the informative/ educational aspect and the fictional/ narrative one with talent. Great info above, and thanks to Dyllan and Brad for adding a little freshness in this thread through their comments.

[dyllane and brad]

Reviewer: dyllaneandbrad Signed Date: 03/31/07 - 08:57PM Title: Familly & Friends

 

Chapter 18 families and friends.

 

Well we had to say we both enjoyed this chapter as well as the other 17.

 

I'm sorry this is more than a review but a observation of sorts please bear with us and sorry for use off the words marked with .**

 

My Dad kind of let me down when I came out to him in fact he left home and tried to have me "FIXED" at a religious camp. It failed I'm glad to say. At times the people that are supposed to love you/us the most are often the ones who don't show the love we need or fail they just us at our most vulnerable times in our lives either by design or by accident or by pressures of how will the Guys at work or church think of me if they find out my son is gay/or a fagot** .(sorry for choice of word**)

 

A lot of our instincts or behaviour as we grow up come from the way were taught as youngsters. Very small kids don't see color at first. If you place some two yr olds in a play pen or room together they will happily play and interact in a loving way and even hug each other openly or even bed down and sleep hugging each other.

 

As the children grow up and if one of the children is shown a racist point of view or a bigoted point of view then often the child becomes racist or bigoted themselves as well not really understanding why. Or if a child is told not to play with the disabled kid or the "queer** kid" (sorry for choice of word**)then often the bigotry is transferred to the next generation often a gay kid is a bully to other gays or a racist as a cover in fear of punishment of retribution from family or friends.

 

Although this is not all ways the case and of course there are always those who do turn out to do the right thing.

 

My dad has finally come round although he's still not 100% happy with my sexuality or me having relationship he's more accepting towards us both as a couple. and classes Brad as a son . Especially during my illnesses brad has also show him that in fact it is love and not the fact Brad want to get his rocks off.

 

It transpire his hate is more to do with him being scared that we will be hurt and maybe killed but in his way of protection he hurt us both far, far worse than a school bully or bigot could have done. Just as Brian's Mom and Dad were at first so against their son being gay and having a gay relationship, but in this wonderfully written chapter it seems the fact the two of them are now changing their outlook as they see their love and commitment the boys are showing towards each other.

 

Also the fact that Alan is gay or now at least bisexual and he is able to admit this fact openly is a huge step forward in their family healing.

 

We're glad that and hope that both the boys and families can continue to over come this part of their live but I think they may face problems as we often all face some prejudices in our own lives.

 

 

 

Once again thank you Altimexis

 

writen by Brad for

DyllsnBradxxx123

 

There is a destiny that makes us Brothers,

 

None goes his way alone;

 

All that we send into the hearts of others, Comes back into our own.

 

(Author unknown)

[Bondwriter]

Another good chapter indeed. A lot has changed in Aaron's and Brian's lives since the beginning of the story! The church episode is great, and the change Brian's dad has gone through is even more impressive than the boys'. As apparently it rings true to lots of people's ears, cheers to this great character.

Aaron won't be spared the hearing. But at least there's now serious evidence of the reckless driver doing it. Though there's little hope the police will apologize for behaving as jerks.

[C James]

Great chapter!!

 

One thing bothered me though;

That, and the fact that you have a sterling record,

 

How can Aaron have a sterling record if he doesn't have a driver's license?

 

I liked the disclaimer at the end, and the listing of the fact that HIV has a latency period (and thus, a negative test is not proof conclusive, and may very well be a false negative during the latency period, especially the first month after contact).

 

The "being out at school" sounds ominous. Brian isn't exactly in a position to defend himself, or run.

 

I loved the scene in the Church. That was a classic.

[Bondwriter]

I don't know if many people saw this was up. Lots of love showing in everyday life in this chapter. Both between Aaron and Brian, and through the whole family circle. Really glad there was this turnaround in Brian's family, it helps out big time. And the fact A&B have been intimate before does play a part in them being able to cope with all the everyday cares Brian needs.

Now, the big cliffhanger: the hearing. Quite anxious to read it.

[C James]

I don't know if many people saw this was up. Lots of love showing in everyday life in this chapter. Both between Aaron and Brian, and through the whole family circle. Really glad there was this turnaround in Brian's family, it helps out big time. And the fact A&B have been intimate before does play a part in them being able to cope with all the everyday cares Brian needs.

Now, the big cliffhanger: the hearing. Quite anxious to read it.

 

Completely agreed.

 

That hearing looks ominous to me. I'm wondering how the law works on things like that. I've heard (not sure if it is true) that in drunk-driving cases, the drunk driver can be prosecuted for an accident even if clearly not at fault. I'm wondering if the same applies to unliscenesed drivers?

 

Poor Brian; he's starting to face the permanence of it all.

[Bondwriter]

Phew! The hearing went well! A really nice feelgood chapter. I cannot imagine the drama had Brian's parents kept acting as they did just after the accident! The romance is really sweet (as it has been from the beginning actually).

[C James]

Phew! The hearing went well! A really nice feelgood chapter. I cannot imagine the drama had Brian's parents kept acting as they did just after the accident! The romance is really sweet (as it has been from the beginning actually).

 

This chapter was one heck of a releif, and I was happy to see that Aaron didn't get the book thrown at him.

I liked the courtroom scene, and HArvy.

 

That was a touch of a cliffhanger though, alluding to the next day, which if I recall is their first day "out" at school?

[C James]

This chapter (21) illustrates all too well that for many people in wheelchairs due to spinal injuries, there is far more involved than merely being unable to walk.

 

Brian passing out is (guessing here) a complication of his condition, but I'm at a loss as to what it might be.

[Bondwriter]

Maybe Brian suffers from a respiratory problem as he's playing the trumpet?

This chapter does not hide the problems both guys have to face.

Maybe the way Brian has Chad changing his mind over Mrs Sampson is a bit over the top. Whereas some really nice kids do exist, if Aaron and Brian could be shown having (some minor) flaws, it would enhance the moments when their goodness really matters.

[C James]

Maybe Brian suffers from a respiratory problem as he's playing the trumpet?

This chapter does not hide the problems both guys have to face.

Maybe the way Brian has Chad changing his mind over Mrs Sampson is a bit over the top. Whereas some really nice kids do exist, if Aaron and Brian could be shown having (some minor) flaws, it would enhance the moments when their goodness really matters.

 

Bondwriter got it, I think, on all counts, per Ch 22!

[Bondwriter]

These boys sure are full of resources and have a way to turn wrongs into rights. Another nice chapter, in which they earn respect at school. And are they lucky to live in a supportive environment. For me this has become a nice feelgood weekly read. Thanks Altimexis.

[C James]

OK, I've been stewing regarding what to say about "Love in a Chair" for several chapters. I do have some minor concerns, but the reason for my recalcitrance is that I don't know if this is just a matter of my personal taste (which should be ignored) or if it is more general, and might be useful. I still can't decide, so I thoguht I'd share it with the caveat of "a large grain of salt" and let you decide.

 

The detailed descriptions of Brians bowel and urinary problems are a negative for me. I know it's important to mention them, but could you refer to them in the narration in passing rather than describing them in detail? Or via dialog (always a good tool when you don't want detail).

 

The other thing that bothered me was the description of Brian and Arron's lovemaking, with Arron rubbing the scar over Brian's injury. That gave me goosebumps, and not the good kind. BUT, the reason may be personal and thus meaningless; I have a scar , from an accident when I was 10, that took a lot of stitches. I have a rather large scar from it. Still, to this day, I hate to touch it, it just gives me the creeps. I certainly have never let anyone else touch it, and the odd time that's happened, I end up literally leaping away. It doesn't hurt, the problem is psychological, but as a result it struck me as very odd that Brian would be ok to be touched on his wound.

 

The last concern I have is the same as Bondwriter's; So far, Brian and Arron have come across as far too well-adjusted to a new and devastating situation. I've seen no trace of anger from Brian at all, and I'd have expected anger, at least. Just my opinions.

 

CJ

Edited April 29, 2007 by C James

[Altimexis]

OK, I've been stewing regarding what to say about "Love in a Chair" for several chapters. I do have some minor concerns, but the reason for my recalcitrance is that I don't know if this is just a matter of my personal taste (which should be ignored) or if it is more general, and might be useful. I still can't decide, so I thoguht I'd share it with the caveat of "a large grain of salt" and let you decide.

 

CJ, constructive criticism is always appreciated.

 

The detailed descriptions of Brian's bowel and urinary problems are a negative for me. I know it's important to mention them, but could you refer to them in the narration in passing rather than describing them in detail? Or via dialog (always a good tool when you don't want detail).

 

You're not the first person to mention this, actually. One of my editors (I won't mention names here) also mentioned being grossed out be mention of Brian's bowel care, so much so that I had to clearly mark these sections so he could skip them. The problem is that it is just these aspects of living with a spinal cord injury that are so important to the story. Of course I could have glossed over them or put them into a narrative, but it wouldn't have been real. IMO it's very important that these aspects of Brian's care be discussed, that their impact on sexuality be considered and that they ultimately be treated as if they are completely normal. Any of us could find ourselves in Brian's shoes, so to speak, some day. One of my closest friends from school (the guy I had the crush on in The New Job) is now a quadriplegic, thanks to a skiing injury (and he was an expert skier).

 

I'm curious, however, to know what other people think. Why is it that people who are perfectly comfortable with descriptions of fingers and even tongues being stuck up people's assholes are squeamish at the thought of a suppository being stuck up the same place?

 

The other thing that bothered me was the description of Brian and Arron's lovemaking, with Arron rubbing the scar over Brian's injury. That gave me goosebumps, and not the good kind. BUT, the reason may be personal and thus meaningless; I have a scar , from an accident when I was 10, that took a lot of stitches. I have a rather large scar from it. Still, to this day, I hate to touch it, it just gives me the creeps. I certainly have never let anyone else touch it, and the odd time that's happened, I end up literally leaping away. It doesn't hurt, the problem is psychological, but as a result it struck me as very odd that Brian would be ok to be touched on his wound.

 

Actually, scars can be highly erotic, but only if one has incorporated them into their own body image, first. Simply massaging one's scar daily can help one to get over their squeamishness and to accept the scar as a part of who they are. I'll discuss this in quite a bit more detail in the sequel to Love in a Chair (yes, there will be a sequel if there is interest), in which a teenager with an amputation must learn to deal with the loss of a limb.

 

It's interesting how different people adapt to an injury. A good analogy is diabetes. Most of us would cringe at the idea of sticking themselves to check their blood sugar, or injecting themselves with insulin and, yet, many people do this every day. I guess you could say that we all adapt to the best of our abilities. I just wanted to make Brian's adaptation seem as normal as possible.

 

The last concern I have is the same as Bondwriter's; So far, Brian and Arron have come across as far too well-adjusted to a new and devastating situation. I've seen no trace of anger from Brian at all, and I'd have expected anger, at least. Just my opinions.

 

CJ

 

Oh, you are so perceptive. We are on the cusp of decent into Brian's anger, grief and despair, and I'm not going to say anything more about it for now.

 

Altimexis

[Bondwriter]

The detailed descriptions of Brians bowel and urinary problems are a negative for me. I know it's important to mention them, but could you refer to them in the narration in passing rather than describing them in detail? Or via dialog (always a good tool when you don't want detail).

The latest suggestion is a good one. Though these scenes did not fill me with joy, they did not get me sad as the accident or the police interview, which were quite detailed themselves. That was my comment in a previous post, that their intimacy before the accident made this possible. And you made it sound like it was one occasion of being close to each other. So maybe using other narrative devices could be good, but I'd say these are important in the whole endeavor, and to me, it makes Aaron more heroic.

 

Oh, you are so perceptive. We are on the cusp of decent into Brian's anger, grief and despair, and I'm not going to say anything more about it for now.

Then, unless you've seen cases like this in real-life (as I would imagine there isn't one single reaction to spinal cord injury), I'd say it's a bit mean for the reader. Here we are, with two really nice kids, whom some would call goody-two shoes even; most people they meet are sympathetic (and gay!); and it's not about to end happily with health issues under control? Without the least hint of Brian difficulties to get by, we'll see how it goes down, but I'm not sure it's going to be pleasant.