LJH

My heart cries out for you bro. People who judge others better make sure they are perfect, that includes parents ans siblings friends and enemies. People who have this attitude have mastered the art over the years. Generally, people like this always come off second best, yet still they persevere in making a misery of another's life. You must train yourself to not see the faults. You must always remain positive for in one moment of weakness, darkness has a knack of filtering through. I am sensing that you do not show your frustration. A good thing. But maybe you need to rant at him instead of bottling up. Maybe you need to chat and find the deeper edge that will enlighten you as to why he is like this. Comminicate. Understand. Take action. Dont let him control you, and dont allow him to make assumptions. Hope u face the cliff and come out of it feeling better, bro. Hugs n respect

A glimpse into a frightful future where man simply plays out and becomes God. The concept is brilliantly thought out and well constructed. I look at this from an editor's pov and i can say u was fixated by the great mechanics of the writing. If your intent was to speak to to the reader, you achieved this. As a reader i was interested to see where this story would take me, and i am happy that you left it open ended. Now a hero could come along and destroy these remedies for the greater good of all mankind. (thinking out loud). Your discussion and narrative was easy to follow. The relgious, political and social aspects well thought out. Then i thought, well, ofcourse the powers that be will create all if this chaos. There would be a rise in the price of food, in medical sssistance, in fuel and of course this whole thing will make millions of dollars for the top 100 companies worldwide, so in reading between the lines, i looked at what was not stated. A story well written. Something that could def come to pass.

These sentences gripped me: In the beginning there was light People dont want to die Self-delusion is a human trick Anger only creates more anger I just wanted someone to love me I am quite ready to go on another journey Now, i have researched death and heaven and hell and life for one of my own stories and i was completely drawn into this insightful tale of death. But then again, i looked at your stories inside it and wondered: Hang on a sec. This isn't just about death, its about life. The living. And i was like wow! Amazing how you manages to intertwine these two dimensions. In this tale, it would be impossible to not merge the two as with out life, death is nothing, and without death, life is nullified. Immortality is only found in death, isn't that strange. So here comes WL and immortalizes these stories viewed from different ports of call. Characterization was excellent. Narrative was excellent. Dialogues were superb, and those gems i listed above, to me, were striking and true. I wanted this to continue, but alas, as you gave life to this story, so you applied its death, and for that i shall forgive, but never forget lol

Oh the demons that reside within us. The labels. The pressure. All hurt. Intrinsic. Ensconced in what society wants from us. Living a lie for rhe sake of orhers always ends in tragedy so im happy he is coming out now and hw is willing to put inro plaxe a plan b id his career nosedives. I enjoyed the read. Thank you

I have always believed that if a story can bring tears to my eyes and a hefty lump in my throat, then that story deserves accolades. Passion and tenderness is hard to write. It takes a lot of soul searching. I enjoyed this story on many levels, one is because in a limited amount of words you showed how a young mans mind can play tricks with him, two, that sometimes even the manliest of men can break because of the live he harbours for his children or child and three, because it is well written and i know, superbly edited. In my view this is a stand out tale because it shows angst and the suspense is evident from the first paragraph. It is a huge step and a difficult step for any child to make, your showing of this was brilliant. Well done. (dofs hat)

Yup intense. I enjoyed the twist and more so; cold shivers in the unused diner. I love the way you show the scenes because showing draws the reader in and you did that remarkably well. There are really two twists to the story: the one could be that it was all a dream and the other may just be reality and you subtly tell the reader to make up his own mind about it. Whichever, i felt that destiny has her roots in everything. We choose to live by the choices we make, and when one choice turns bad, we can always correct it. The beautiful thing about life is that our creator did not give us a limit to our choices like some human game show does, like some jobs do, like some relationships do. Our choice base is limitless. That was something quite ironic to experience in your story, the fact that he could physically go back to change the course of destiny, which of course, our creator has not bestowed on us. I loved it.

Ja....another bravo! Man this was such a lekker story. Hooked from the first word. Drawn into it like a bee to a hive. I actually got goosies. The way in which you switch between monologue and dialogue and narrative bit me and i honestly did not want it to end. The morality of being gay is a huge issue with youngsters, particularly those who are confused sexually and those who have just come out. I remember discovering the word homosexual I was like, "0h, is that the word. I like it." The issues expressed in your tale are true for all the generations that have passed and to come. Well done and brilliant in style and concept.

Bravo, Sam. I did laugh. But i was saddened too. You evoke pathos and adjust the collimation for both characters. One understands and knows the other does not and runs from it. The collusion between the two characters is respectful and a work of art. I must admit tho, the deliquesence i felt when the two friends came together warmed and satified me. Your tale infused me with warmth. Thankyou

Marky....thank you for liking it. I was hoping you'd see the humour in it. LOL

I'm sorry I see this from another angle. Almost a comedy. Been there done that if you will. I was in a very long relationship. I had need for a good hammer or mallet a few times. Well written. thanks Richard. I write everything from romance to the bizarre. This one came suddenly and quickly. So I had to end it quick before it got lost in character building. Twist was more important here than anything else. One thing I have learned in my relationship is understanding, something my character in the story did not possess. Thanks once again.

Its a pleasure to be associated with this story, Billy. I have followed it and believed in it from chapter 1. Andy is a strong, determined guy and he takes full responibility for his identity as a gay person. I love the fact that he will not tolerate criticism about that, and that he fights back, always on the side of the underdog. Joey, to me is solemn, almost hiding from himself and that is due to his violent history. There is such a huge gap (personality wise) between Andy and Joey and its tangible. Roger is simply a great true friend to both and deserves accolades cos his character is growing with them. I enjoyed this chapter. It brings out certain aspects of the nurse that we never knew about. You have done some interesting research with the law here, and by doing so, you have made the story more believable. I like the idea of adoption for Joey. I love Roger's end scene. Im glad you were able to infuse some humour to the chapter. Well done bro.

Another hero writer passes on. I loved his work

Im asking myself if lucca is ready to accept himself. He seems to because he wants people to know but he just cant find the right time i guess. Im reading between the lines that matt is a very sensitive person and lucca realises his mistake from the first chapter. I dont know enough about matt but i hope he will feature on his own in a later chapter. He is mysterious while lucca is lively and impulsive. Im enjoying this work.

A multilayered storey is always a pleasure for me to read. You make your characters multidimensional too. I sense that somewhere along the line there will be a joining of the characters lucca/matt sam/jeremy. Your easy style of writing is clear and you show the story so far quite well. Lucca's feelings for matt and sams relationship with his family are vivid and ordinary which allows the reader to identify.

I like how you place me in lucca's world. I was hooked from para 1. You brought a smile to me for ending the chap this way coz it means there will be a journey for me and i love journeys. I hope matt sees how much lucca loves him in later chapters.

Neat and tidy. But there is something. This is where the problems start? I am itching to know where you will take us on this journey. I love it when a parent accepts. It took my. Folks a long time but when my younger bro came out they just accepted without question. I guess i paved the way lol

Hey stu happy birthday here's to a great day just getting spoiled rotten. Hugs

When i say Go. Make mistakes. I mean that its okay to make mistakes and i dont mean it in a harsh way. Sure, people do say "follow your heart" or "do what is right for you" maybe thats like saying "whatever" the thing is that following your heart can lead anywhere; down the depths of despair or up to heaven. Ultimately you must make the choice cos your life is based on the choices you make and only you control your destiny. We have s responsibilty to ourselves to make good of the lessons we have learned. No matter what the situation is my only rule is this: whatever you have chosen to do, make sure you feel good about it at the end of the day.

Um ... Its really very simple. Just dont ask for advice. Rather ask for confirmation of what you wanna do. If the friend cannot confirm, or conform, then just go ahead and learn by your mistakes. The only reason people give advice is because there are ethics and moral values attached to the advice. Personally i hate dishing out advice. I learned by the mistakes i made. Go. Make mistakes. You will be hurt for some time. But you will have learned.

I was thinking well look That bullet is probably in the fourth chamber. He's lucky i thought. He wont feel a thing. Or maybe there are two bullets. If the one dies, then he will shoot himself. Noooo! I thought. I screamed out when the fifth chance to die came I was like o my god! Is this guy some kind of crazy? The thing with an experience like this is that it lives on for quite some time in the mind of both protagonist and antagonist. In this case, who is who? Both have become each other. I felt for both of them yet hated both of them. Two wrongs i thought, does not make a right. The reasons given were really one sided. When the sixth opportunity to die came i was breathless. I did mot want either man to die. Yes its all about action and reaction. Deed and revenge. Endgame. Redemption. I loved it.

Aha. First reaction: wha! 2nd reaction: damn! You do colours well. From the sublime yellowish peace of the beginning to the wham red at the end.It begins as a warm summer day and ends as a white ice cold winter of discontent for Douglas. With the exception of the fog that belies a vague danger, there is no inkling of the tragedy that is about to strike. Your writing about SA made me smug with a smile. I feel totally relaxed reading a fellow SAfrican's work. You seem passionate about writing and that is all an editor like myself asks for. I especially liked the transition from comfy to pacy when the accident happens. I like your stories. I want more please.

Hmmm and i laughed to see such fun. I could see it all. Like i was in the room. Lord this was well written. A coupla gremlins but nothing to write home about. I remember my first love. We bunked school and found ourselves alone at home. I was like wowed by this guy and kept on thinking: is he going to touch me. Please touch me. I wanna b touched. And when he did I realised this is what i want. I was blown away. I like it that there was no sex in your story. I was surprised that Peter turned out gay. Well done bro

Marky marky. Paulo. The narrative drives the story at a consistent pace. Im feeling excited for mark and it seems he will have his way eventually. So far i am hooked on this mysterious but romantic seeming Paulo. He actaully stalked Mark. Thats not mentioned. But a sudden collision speaks a thousand words. I think there aregoing to be surprises galore in this story.

Your easy writing style, like walking through a busy mall, effortlessly, was the hook for me. You make writing seem so simple. I thotoughly ejnoyed the coming out scene. I think Mark was more in shock than the reader or Jo. Obviously the fact that her brother is gay, soes make it simpler to detect, so her gaydar was on full aspect. I look forward to reading more, and hope that Mark meets her brother, or someone just perfect for him. Cool piece. I love your descriptions. They aren't slab-stoned, and a lot of passion has gone into describing the characters Mark and Jo, that was the first thing I looked out for because it's so imprtant to get the image of the character as soon as possible. Yeah, really lekker stuff, bro.

He is writing in the sky now... Godspeed maurice...